Cocktail Review

You're not a goddamn thing any one of those professors

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at Audible underscore com. And now the latest

and greatest in movies with MWIRE. What's the

matter? Find a hair in your quiche? No, I'm looking

for a job. I see. You want to put a hair in somebody

else's quiche. Just get canned. I'm looking.

Looking for something better. Coughlin's Law.

Anything else is always something better. Coughlin's

Law? Douglas Coughlin. Logical, negative. Flourished

in the last part of the 20th century, propounded

a set of laws that the world generally ignored.

To its detriment. Me. Ever work behind the bar?

My uncle's in the business. You know how to make

a red eye, Mr. What's -Your -Name? Brian Flanders,

I know. I'm sorry I haven't had the pleasures

yet. What about a vodka martini with a perno

flute? I'm a fast learner. Throw a 400 -pound

psychopath out of a bar? Guess I could if I had

to. What about a 100 -pound ballerina that's

been speeding for three days? Just open the door

and let her pirouette out in the street? Well,

these are just some of the tasks you'll be asked

to perform, young Flanagan. This is the Upper

East Side, the saloon capital of the world. Big

time. Are you ready for the big time young Mr.

Flanagan? See, the name of the game is woman.

Little darlings come in a panting, the little

hearts a pit of patting for the handsome, all

-knowing bartender. And in their wake, a parade

of slobbering geeks with one hand on their crotches

and the other hand on their wallets. You get

the women, you get the bucks, and boy, oh boy,

you've got them. Buttons were popping, skirts

were rising. When you can see the color of their

panties, then you know you got talent. Stick

with me, son, I'll make you a star. Hello and

welcome to M -WIRE Movie Week in Review, brought

to you by the GeekCaster, Radio Network, and

Audible .com. I am one of your hosts, Tio John

Mike, and joining me is that crazy Canuck, JT

from Saskatoon. Good day sir, and I've never

been diagnosed as crazy. Everyone just tells

me I am Everyone from Canada is crazy. I mean

look at a lot of the people that we interact

with from Canada How many people do you interact

from Canada? Sadly too many And today we are

going to be I don't know, this might have a fine

line in the sand. It might be me trying to convince

JT of my opinion of episode 88's film. We are

not in a DeLorean. We are not ramping it up to

88 miles per hour since that was done all the

way back in episode 1 of Movie Week in Review.

But we're talking about the 1988 Tom Cruise...

Cocktail today so and oddly enough it came out

in 1988 so that's 88 I That's why I use it if

people go back in from episode 80 to 89 if they

go back and look at that I tried For the most

part tried picking films that we talked about

that came out in that year. So episode 81 Well,

Addison Avon was actually Adventures in Babysitting,

which I'd come to find out didn't come out until

87, lovely. I screwed that up, but Episode 84

was Days of Thunder. You can grandfather Adventures

in Babysitting in. Yeah. It's kind of like saying,

I consider the movie Tremors kind of an 80s movie,

even though it came out in 1990. You can grandfather

it in like that. And see, that's the thing. It's

like a lot of the great films. And I think that

was, I didn't so much have that problem. And

this is actually a discussion for GCR. But now

I can separate decades. Back then as a kid, I

couldn't separate a decade. from another decade

to save my life. My 10 year old self still says

new kids on the block is 80's music, even though

I know it's not. Because it came out in 1990.

Shut up, AT. Stop snickering over there. I can

hear you through the internet. I can just visually

see you. I'm not snickering, Mike. That might

be my fan that you're hearing. So without any

further ado we're gonna head on over to JT with

his Just the Facts setting up the film for Cocktail

and we'll come back after that. Blue shirt, fifth

row, wake up! Ah, light dawns on Marblehead!

Hey guys, JT from Saskatoon here. I'm here with

today's Just the Facts. You know, they tell tales

of a movie from the 80s, a movie that is so divisive

that to this day, people cannot agree whether

or not it's good or bad. Oh yes, such a movie

exists, and that movie is 1988's Cocktail, directed

by Roger Donaldson and starring Tom Cruise, Elizabeth

Shue, and Brian Brown. Based on the book of the

same name, the film follows Brian Flanagan, played

by Cruz, an ambitious young man trying to make

it in the New York bar scene as a bartender.

But as we are shown early in the film, he lacks

the necessary skill and experience. But all that

changes when Doug Coughlin, played by Brian Brown,

takes Brian under his wing and teaches him the

trade, which also includes a lot of flair bartending.

As time goes on, their actor was popular and

the duo began working at a trendy nightclub.

Around this time, Brian reveals he wants to open

a bar with Doug. The world -weary mixologist

scoffs at the idea, but says that they should

name it Cocktails and Dreams. However, their

friendship comes to an end when Doug lies to

a woman Brian is sleeping with in order to win

a bet. Brian then takes off to Jamaica to find

work as a resort bartender still intent on opening

his own bar. He meets and falls in love with

an artist from New York named Jordan. Eventually,

Doug, who is by now married to a wealthy woman

with a wondering eye, re -enters Brian's life.

He manages to get Brian to take a dare to sleep

with Bonnie, a wealthy bar fly at the resort.

Jordan sees Brian do this and takes an overnight

plane back to New York. devastated beyond repair.

Despite what feelings he has for Jordan Bryan

under the impression he will get a high paying

job at her company goes back to New York with

Bonnie. This however does not work out for Bryan

and he angrily breaks up with Bonnie and goes

to seek out Jordan. Brian finds her and discovers

not only is she pregnant with his child, her

family is very wealthy. When Brian goes to plead

to Jordan for another chance, her father tries

to buy him off with a check for $10 ,000. Brian

rejects the money, despite the fact it would

help him get his bar started, saying he loves

Jordan and wants to be a good father. Jordan,

however, stays away from Brian, not wanting to

be hurt again. Needing a friend, Brian goes to

see Doug. Brian finds that things are not going

very well for his old friend. Despite the appearance

of wealth, Doug is nearly broke and then his

wife reveals herself to be unfaithful when she

tries to seduce Brian. Out of respect for his

friendship with Doug, Brian refuses her advances

and goes to check on his friend. Sadly, Doug,

upon realizing his life is a lie, has committed

suicide by cutting his throat with a broken bottle

of cognac. Reeling from the loss of his friend,

Brian goes back to Jordan to beg for her forgiveness

one more time. Despite protests from her father,

she relents and leaves with Brian to be married.

Brian eventually realizes his dream of opening

a neighborhood bar called Flanagan's Cocktails

and Dreams where he and Jordan hold their wedding

reception. Jordan reveals that they're having

twins and the film ends with Brian happily announcing

that the bar is open. Opening on July 29, 1988,

Cocktail made a huge splash raking in $170 million

at the box office. The film was filled with a

plethora of popular 80s actors, such as Tom Cruise,

Elizabeth Shue, Brian Brown, as well as appearances

by Kelly Lynch and a very young Gina Gershon.

However, it was not all wine and roses as the

movie drew considerable flack from movie critics

and moviegoers. Many critics, including Mr. Roger

Ebert, said the film was empty and fabricated

and did not have very much going for it. However,

some critics did give some praise to the film

for its music and the flair bartending sequences.

And, as I said earlier, the casual moviegoers

are still split in this film. In the course of

research for this Just the Facts, I found that

about half the people who have seen this movie

still either love it or hate it. It's either

just plain bad, or you put it in the so bad it's

good category. You know? Like Roadhouse. Despite

what one may think, Cocktail has left its mark

on the pop culture landscape. Twenty years later,

the film is still referenced in television and

film, and the film is still remembered for its

soundtrack, which contained many songs from artists

such as John Cougar Millencamp and Robert Palmer.

The most well -known part of the soundtrack for

many people was the Beach Boys song Kokomo, the

video of which featured John Stamos, TV's Uncle

Jesse, on conga steel drums. Cocktail is a movie

that It tries to be like The Graduate, but comes

off more like Roadhouse. Not that that's really

a bad thing. It has style, it has flash, but

ultimately it's up to you. You either love this

movie or you hate this movie. Myself, still undecided.

This has been Just the Facts Cocktail. I'm JT

from Saskatoon. Back to you guys. A word some

of you will get to know well in the future. Like

Mr. Ron Lemaster. Where is Ronnie Lemaster? Yes,

our cosmetics magnate who hopes to make his fortune

selling makeup for pets. Fetch, Ronnie, fetch.

Good boy. And my own personal favorite, Mrs.

Sheila Rivkin. Oh, my God, he's got my paper.

Mrs. Ripken has spent the last 20 years burning

her husband's dinners, but now decides she wants

to become the Donald Trump of the cookie business.

You. You. You have something to contribute? I

just said it wasn't worth getting upset about.

What's your name? Brian Flanagan. Now speak up.

Let the class hear you. Brian Flanagan. Oh, yes,

Flanagan. Mr. Flanagan. Mr. Brian Flanagan. Let

us see. Yes, Mr. Flanagan is determined to revolutionize

the bar business by franchising his version of

the local New York tavern to every suburban shopping

mall in America. Tell me, Mr. Flanagan, do you

intend to provide the smell of stale beer or

perhaps a surly bartender and three boring drunks

to each outlet? I don't know. Are you looking

for another job? Ah, a diamond in the rough.

The dreamer who can't take the criticism. Not

from a guy who hides here because he can't hack

it in the real world. Okay, Flanagan. Let's see

how well you hack it in the real world with an

F in this course. F! So there you go. That was

JT from, oh, you're actually here this time around.

I know. It's kind of a weird dichotomy in the

grand scheme of things, but, you know. But, glad

I could help. Yes, you pretty much essentially

set the whole stage with the plot and the actors

and the box office and all that stuff but I mean

really honestly as far as setting the stage I

It's weird for me. It's I guess this is more

of a general memory than setting the stage for

the film, but the funny thing is in I've said

this before on this show and on other shows my

mom pretty much let me watch anything And I think

the first time I ever saw this was whenever it

hit VHS. I don't know if it hit VHS in 88 or

89. I'm assuming it hit obviously at least six

months after it was in theaters. But it was either

late 88 or sometime in 1980 when I first saw

this film. I was eight or nine years old. We

rented this and returned to Oz. And I watched

them back -to -back and I have no idea why Which

came first? Return to Oz then cocktail so it

was like that's Really weird It's kind of like

you get a you get a joint in one hand an alcoholic

beverage in the other And either way you're gonna

get fucked up spoilers Gotta say the first time

I didn't actually see cocktail until I was almost

in high school Yeah, like it Just never really

came up. I mean my biggest obsession with this

movie is a friend of mine in grade school, you

know, he had the soundtrack and I mean I listened

to Everything my parents listened to growing

up in the 80s You look at the soundtrack. I mean,

we'll get into a little more in depth later,

but there's some great songs on here And, you

know, I borrowed it from my friend, and I loved

it. And he's like, yeah, I'd like to see this.

And I remember my, you know, eight -year -old

self, 10 -year -old self, when I see the poster

for this, like, on the front of the cassette,

I thought it was badass. You know, the way Cruz

is posed like that, he's looking at you all intense,

and when he pours, he rains. I look at it now,

and I'm like, that is the goofiest. king poster

i've ever seen like it's trying to be all intense

and whatnot i look at it now it just makes me

laugh so all right talking about the poster since

you brought it up looking at it on the on the

wikipedia page i remember as a kid and ever since

you know since i've grown up since then i'm like

who is that moron on the cover because the only

reason why I say that and it's not it's I'm not

saying anything bad about Tom Cruise in the 80s

the only reason why I said that to myself as

a kid was like who is that guy on the cover because

I you know yeah okay yeah you see his name on

there but like Tom Cruise to me was Pete Mitchell

was Top Gun was all this other stuff and that

cover unless you like really look at it up at

least for me maybe it's my vision issues i don't

know that cover to me when i would just glance

at it i couldn't recognize who the hell it was

for the life of me whatsoever what i did just

didn't it just didn't even register with me yeah

as as a kid um but no i mean this film i don't

understand why this oh god You have to bring

this up again, son of a bitch. This film has

hatred on a Nickelback level, and I just don't

understand it. Oh, yeah. I mean, and I mentioned

that in the GTF that literally, like, I did pull

some of my friend, like, my coworkers at my work

there, the off sale on Maguire's, and, like,

half of them were like, oh, yeah, that's a great

movie. It's like, really? Really? Yeah, it's

it's like I said in the JTF. It's like Roadhouse.

It's like movies like Barry Gordy's the last

dragon You know, it's it's in this weird nebulous

state where it's so bad. It's good, but it's

an entirely Personal choice or aesthetic. It's

yeah like Nickelback It's either you love it

or you don't and like I said in the JTF Not entirely

undecided. I do there's a lot of this movie.

I like But it's like here and there there's so

much I like and there's so much that I just want

to smack my own brain For why am I watching this?

You know like okay? Like I said you look at the

cast like you look at you got Tom Cruise you

got Brian Brown who I've I've been a huge fan

of his ever since I was a little kid for basically

the FX movies which was the only other thing

i had seen him in and yeah well i've i've seen

him in like a lot of direct to video right so

i i i'm a little bit maybe i'm a more fan of

his uh... catalog but you know i like him and

it's it's not just because i like my brother

i like the way he plays you know that coglick

which is and these are memorable characters i

mean these are characters that You know, once

you see this film, you can't un -forget Mr. Twirly

Teacher Mustache Man Head Face. You can't un

-forget Tom Cruise. You can't un -forget Doug

Coughlin. You know, you can't un -forget those

characters, and they brought them to life. Well,

yeah. If I made, just the top of my head, if

I made a top five favorite Tom Cruise roles in

the 80s, Brian would be probably number three

right after His it escapes me the name of his

character in the movie color of money and then

you know Pete Maverick Mitchell and Top Gun Yeah,

you know cuz it's just the way he plays him like

it's not so much his character was bad He plays

him as this very kind of very almost naive You

know energetic You know just that scene where

he's in in the movie where he's in his city college

class Yeah, and he's getting like berated by

his professor mm -hmm is he he I forget the exact

turns me basically uses He asked him a question

based on some advice. He got from Doug. You know

from Coughlin's law And his professor just looks

at him like he's retarded Yeah, cuz and I love

that cuz I've I've heard tales of that from friends

of mine who are in college where they take actual

real life experience that just totally blows

like, you know, what's the word, it just basically

tears apart this college knowledge that, you

know, and their professors have blown up at them

because they've basically torn apart their argument

and kind of invalidated it. well i think what

the and and we are in by no means say anything

bad about college professors or teachers in general

i think the thing with this film was is that

his morning to go to business school and get

a business degree and you know find a way to

open a business was a complete contradiction

to the night life of You know the bar they were

in at first and then of course, you know cell

block later in the film You know that was a complete

contradiction and you know what one of his lines

in there is You know not a goddamn thing any

one of those professors says Makes a difference

on the street and then Doug's like well if you

know that you're already ready ready to graduate

Yeah, I know and I love that I've always my whole

life like I once I grew old enough to appreciate

that line because I mean I've always been More

street smart than book smart, you know, I'm more

about the practical than the theoretical but

yeah, no, but I mean Brian Brown's character

of Doug Coughlin. Yeah, I mispronounced his name

in the JTF. I apologize He just has this Not

necessarily Sheister. He's got this very roguish

quality about him Like even the way the guy lights

a cigarette or drinks a beer just the way he

played this character in the movie Even right

up until the end when you see everything circling

the drain form You know, I love that character

I also love Gina Gershon's character, but that's

only because I've had a crush on her since I

was like 10 You know see see her come up watching

this on the other night and I was just like,

oh yeah She didn't really add a whole lot to

the overall movie except for bringing up the

whole Jamaica plot but Yeah, it's still it's

Gina Gershon. I find no fault with that Yeah,

the one the one that I Like I absolutely loved

like it said the main three is Tom Bryan and

Elizabeth shoes character Jordan Yeah, I mean

you look it's Elizabeth shoe. It's just yeah.

I can't not love this woman It's it's mrs. McFry

before she was mrs. McFry And I mean she's the

replacement Oh God I've watched the show all

the time that she's like replace Mark Heldenberger's

character on CSI CSI yeah, she's backing up Sam

Malone Yeah, chill. But yeah, no, I love her

in this movie because she played she's got this

very and in all her movie. She's got this very

Girl next door ish quality, you know, she just

it seems very natural to me And I love the whole

what the most baffling part of the Jamaica sequence

where Brian meets Jordan is you know He meets

her and he's flirting like mad and you know,

they're falling in love and then Doug shows up

again and Yeah, and Doug shows up again and everything

goes to shit It kind of does because Doug makes

a bet with him and you know It's like he's he's

the virus and all of a sudden Brian's got this

wondering dick syndrome again I mean it's granted.

It's only with one woman, you know, because I

love how he shows up and he's like, hey It's

me. I'm back and Brian's like hey, buddy, you

know, he's like Despite how the relationship

and and I still think that's like one of the

most douche baggiest moves in an 80s movie the

way Doug, you know lies to Gina Gershon and then

Brian and her break up and he decks him in the

club and You know, you'll thank me for this someday

and I'm sitting there. No, he won't You know

I literally said that way That was the ultimate

80s dick move over a bet I had to win my money

back Are you serious? Are you sure like dude?

That's like it gets the bro code But I love the

way he shows up again you You as much as you

might dislike his character for the way he treated

Brian back in New York. He shows up again. He

lights that cigarette You know he's all like

hey, buddy. You know just talking all this wonderful

bullshit like that's the other thing I love about

Brian Brown's character this guy can pile up

bull like nobody else but I love that scene but

then he's like you know I he starts talking and

it's almost like he's working a con to like you

know he seduces Brian back into like I bet you

can't take her home you know she's bitch and

yeah you know the thing about this movie is is

that It takes, the way I look at the chronological

events of the film, this film takes place within

a four year, five year span. Because if you look

at it in the beginning, Brian's coming home from

the service, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He

eventually meets Doug. They hang out for X amount

of time until, you know, you get to the cell

block scene. I would say up to the cell block

scene, they've probably known each other for

six months to a year. And then the breakup happens

three years past, because Brian, you know, Doug

actually says it, you know, I've known this man

for three years now. So you think that... It

has to be three or four years in total of the

film. And of course, the five -year mark comes

at the end when he does actually do what he says

he was going to do. And I think that's one of

the best points about this movie is you don't

necessarily notice the progression of time. But

at the same time, you do. Well, yeah, yeah. But

I mean, you don't realize that it's like... Five

six years have gone by in the course of this

film it might only seem like one You know because

he's he's in Jamaica And you think he's only

been there for a while until Doug shows up, and

you know drops that knowledge You know but like

I said Brian there's something about Doug that

just Brian gets wondering dick syndrome again

And he goes home with this bar fly because he's

like gonna get this you know he's gonna be like

cabana boy for because he thinks he's gonna get

this job and, you know, he's kind of... What

was he thinking? I don't care how good the sex

was, she was fugly. Yeah, no, I can't disagree

with you on that. I mean, I love Doug's wife,

like Kelly Lynch, back in the day. I mean, now

she's still good looking, but I mean, back then

it's like, wowza. That was Kelly Lynch? That

was Kelly Lynch. Holy shit, I so did not find

her attractive. Yeah, well, I grew up in the

middle of nowhere, so that's pretty much... No,

no, no, no, I know, but... Okay, okay, maybe

I need to rephrase. Kelly Lynch herself, she

is attractive, but the character of Carrie, I

so did not find attractive because she was just

a total, you know... Slut? Standing on the street,

sticking her leg out, slut, essentially. It's

like, hey, sailor. Yeah. Yeah, whereas, you know...

Mama, white legs, I'm pulling over for that,

joker. Yeah, I was actually just watching the

bad world's finest Bad world's finest I just

love the way she's like wow mama. Yeah No, I

mean, but you look at another like couple years

down the road Kelly Lynch was also in another

one of my favorites so bad It's good movies was

Roadhouse With you know pain don't hurt Dalton

But no, yeah, in this movie, I think the one

scene that I actually found her attractive is

where Doug rolls up. He's like, I am married.

I am in love. And the best part is she's filthy

rich. You know, and as soon as you drop that

line that she's like loaded, it's like, oh, it's

not going to end well from a boy. You know, but

that whole scene in Jamaica. I actually got like

in my mind watching this movie like now, not

back when I was a kid. Right. You know, where

Ryan, you know, goes from like romancing the

girl next door to, yeah, I can sleep with whoever

I want. I was like, really? Are you that much

of a tool? You know, and they go back to New

York and he's sitting there and he's probably

banging her 24 seven. I mean, I don't know how

a setup like that really goes, but you know,

and then he's like calls her on it and she you

get he finally dawns and he's been banging fugly

for so long now however long it has been and

then he just finally blows up is like you know

give me what I want in our walk -in yeah and

then I love that you see how he's absorbed some

of Coughlin's laws where he drops that line you

know everything ends badly otherwise it wouldn't

end that's the part see that's the thing though

that's what makes this film so great is how quotable

it is It's well, especially Coughlin's laws.

I mean exactly but again, that's the only line

that I really and I I may be a doofus as as a

32 year old now the only one I still don't get

is the spam line When he's like, oh I left a

can of spam in the fridge or whatever, you know

what it was when yeah, I still feel like you

bastard I just I didn't didn't understand that

part of it. No, I mean I didn't get that either.

But yeah, then he goes and he goes to see Doug

again cuz you know, you know everything's Gone,

it's again. He's Brian thinks everything's circling

the drain for him and he finds out that you know

Doug's money is gone his he finds out his wife's

a complete whore you know, I was like Just watching

I remember watching it the other day and I'm

just watching is like How did you know cuz I

remember back when I saw this the first time

how I was so like shocked That she you know,

she's coming on to Brian and I remember was watching

the other day I was thinking how did I not see

that coming? Because that first time you meet

Carrie in Jamaica and she's like flirting with

those guys and hear Brian talking about her and

shit How did that not smack you upside the head

is like look, she's a whore You can tell just

looking at her But yeah, it's just weird Yeah,

it is very very very weird Although it has one

of the funniest seeds that for me anyhow It has

one of the funniest moments in the movie where

she's like I can't endure being married to one

man forever I was like that's kind of what marriage

is, honey Yeah, yeah calling him a coward and

blah blah blah and then Yeah. You know, since

we're up to the point of that thing, when he's

going back, it just, as a kid and even now, I

did not expect that. Just did not expect the

suicide of Coughlin at all. Gets me every time.

Well, that's yeah, I mean and that goes every

time is me as well I I can't agree with you or

it says and that goes that's a credit to Brian

Brown's performance is That you like this character

the guy might be a douche, but he's a likeable

douche. Yeah, and it well I would necessarily

say that the The dog is a douche. I would say

that he's done a couple of douchey things well

nine years in the friendship between them yeah

but you know it's one of those things where he's

he's not the greatest friend in the world but

he's still brian's friend so yeah exactly you

know and that whole the whole line of um oh god

what was the line it was um uh bury the dead

they stink up the joint yeah yeah bury the dead

they stick up the joint but then no that wasn't

the letter i'm trying to think of like when they

went to, when they went to celebrate because

I don't know, they made a bet about a $500 bottle

of brandy and, and, oh, the bet was, was the

chick. Yeah. What was the old lady? Um, and Brian

brought it and paid up and, and he, he, he's

like, shouldn't we let it breathe a little? It's

breathed for 5 ,000 years. It's breathed for

1 ,000 years. I forget the year number he said,

but it's breathed for X amount of years. Let's

just drink it. This film is just so quotable,

and I think that's what's so great about it.

There are so many great quotes. I find it really

strange how a lot of people on the internet review

stuff. make fun of me and, you know, chide at

me for, you know, making initial opinions off

of trailers and whatever else. But as I've said

before, that's what the trailers are there for,

to get you to want to watch something. And if

a trailer doesn't grab me, okay, sure, I'll wait

till it gets to Netflix or Redbox or in Punisher

Warzone's case, I'll never, ever fucking see

it. Oh, he totally should. no it'll make you

laugh like anyways you know and and and but I

don't get why how people can see I read a review

at one point of this on the internet and of course

the internet is very I guess subjectable to whoever's

writing the shit but someone said that the plot

was heavy -handed and You know plot themes were

overused and this that everything else and I'm

thinking What was so heavy -handed about it?

It's not like they're hitting you over the head

there. You know they're trying to Between the

friendship they're trying to teach each other

life lessons Yeah, because Brian is going in

this direction of he wants the book smarts He

wants this he wants that whereas Doug for the

last ten years at the point of when they first

meet Has had so much street smarts that he can

teach Brian. Yeah You know, I just don't understand.

Maybe people can comment on the episode here

and tell us why exactly. Not just say, oh, this

movie sucks. Tell us, give us a good damn reason

why you don't like this movie, listeners. Am

I saying it's the best movie ever? No, it's an

enjoyable bar movie. You know with Tom Cruise

and Elizabeth shoe in it and I mean come on that

waterfall scene everybody loved that waterfall

scene Yeah, no, it's There yeah, like you said

there is so many those nipples were two two inches

too too low from being seen Not that there's

anything wrong with that no I know what I'm saying

is like If the water moves slightly just a little

bit more, I'm sure full frontal Probably But

I mean like I said with Doug It it's just that

you grow to like the character so much Over the

course of this film. That's why it's really I

think it's like Truly it is kind of truly tragic

for on a lot of for a lot of reasons I mean,

I mean when people say this movie sucks. It's

not that it's There's there are certainly bad

parts. It's just I think it's just so over -the

-top A lot of times in this movie Like they maybe

you look at the whole bars cheering them on where

they're doing the flair bartending It's like

I've been to bars that have flair bartenders.

They Don't get the whole crowd like that going,

you know, but Yeah, but but yeah with the whole

thing with Doug like it's You establish him as

being this kind of very row roguish type You

know kind of like an 80s version of a swashbuckler

if you will Just in the way that he acted and

everything. It's you grew to like the character

so much and then you get that You get the letter

Yeah, and you see Brian just is motivated to

like try one more time Because he the one thing

is like before this he goes and tries to get

Jordan back and it doesn't really happen And

then I noticed that her dad is paid played by

a cybox box brother from Star Trek 5 As like

I almost didn't You know didn't recognize him

and I kind of paused it the other day when I

was watching the other day And I just kind of

looked mentally drew a beard on it was like holy

shit From the Shatner directed movie, but that's

besides the point. Yes, and he goes back again

to get Jordan and you know Basically fights his

way to her like he's fighting for his child and

the girl the girl he loves and If there is a

true douchebag in this movie, it's Jordan father

Yeah, cuz on the way out you'll get no money

from me and Brian's like fuck you Yeah, does

it actually say that he's like that's the way

I want it Yeah, but it's basically like a big

middle finger to the dad and Jordan's like She

you see it in her eyes as they're going out of

the apartment. She's not so completely sure but

then you see her after and you know at the Wedding

reception at his uncle's bar. Yes, you know like

that and she's like Fuck it. I love the man and

I love how I love that scene the beginning where

he's talking about we should open a bar together

and You know Coughlin's like, you know, she called

cocktails and dreams. So that's you know, what

he ends up naming the bar Which is a pink neon

think think think any blink or whatever he said

Yeah, I love that seat and again. It's the it's

the Australian accent I mean for never mentioned

this before but for those that don't know Brian

Brown is an Australian actor Yes amongst other

Australian actors is notable for having almost

always played an Australian character So he's

never lost his accent right? Yeah, and But no

I love that at the end there like it flashes

back to the scene in the cell block where Ryan's

or Brian's doing the whole the poem so everyone

I thought everyone was yelling speech speech

speech no it's poem poem poem yeah so they do

uh he does the poem and it has that line where

she's like I bet I could still spook you and

you just see this holy shit look I love the look

on his uncle's face at the end yeah drinks are

on the house he's like hell no and the bar is

open and like scene you know what honestly I

do like this movie like I'm not it's not the

greatest movie in the world but I love this movie

because it's partly because it's so over -the

-top partly because of like Brian Brown's and

Tom Cruise's performances there's a lot in it

I don't like but it outweighs the bad The good.

OK, well, what don't you like about it? I mean,

what specifically? Like, if you had to pick three

different things, what would they be? This might

just be me aesthetically now, not so much as

when I first saw it. I liked every scene in that

neighborhood pub where Brian and Doug first meet.

Right. With the oak paneling and the brass rails.

That's a bar for me. And when you get to cell

block, it's not. I wanted to slap. everybody

in that place. I wanted to enter the movie and

run around like the Flash just cock -slapping

everybody in there. Like, I can't stand bars

like that. I... Oh, the bile rises in my throat

every time I see a movie with a bar like that.

It's like, if not for Gina Gershon, I would have

just fast -forwarded through those parts. Like,

really, I just... Oh, I hate that movie. Kelly

Lynch, I just... yeah, it's not so much the Like

you're married to like Doug becomes your best

friend while watching this movie as much as he

is Brian's best friend He becomes your best friend

because I mean if you you know because you end

up loving the character so much And then you're

just like bitch, please Yeah, you know And that's

mostly the stuff like there's other like I said

the whole city college scene where Brian's getting

picked on by his professor because he's challenged

is a see I like that because he stands up to

the dude after a while because He does stand

out. I'm just saying it's just the way he's like,

you know, you're an educator It's your opinion

is not the be all and all the alpha the Omega

You know, you've got somebody who's obviously

learned something beyond what you're putting

down, you know, maybe just pick it up and run

with it. Oh, God. I sincerely hope a certain

Texan does not turn into that teacher. Oh, wait,

he already has. But you get what I mean. I know,

I know, I know. Sorry. But I said, like, good

things. Soundtrack. What pisses me off, though,

is that... Wikipedia says that the soundtrack

has extra tracks. It does not! The actual, both

the cassette and the CD only have ten tracks.

I'm actually going to go ahead and go through

the track listing. You've got Starships Wild

Again, which played at the beginning of the movie.

Very, very awesome. Fabulous Thunderbirds Powerful

Stuff, which played during the cell block scene.

Robbie Neville's Since When, Don't Worry Be Happy

from Bobby McFerrin, Hippie Hippie Shake by the

Georgia Satellites, and of course, and this is

one of the reasons why everyone remembers this

movie, Kokomo by the Beach Boys. I mean, you

can't hear that song and not think about this

movie. Actually, most of the time when I hear

that song, I just think, why? Because as soon

as I hear Kokomo, it's in my head for like three

days. This is the earworm, ladies and gentlemen.

And then I love the fact that when I first got

Satellite Dish in high school, I got one of the

big old C -band Satellite Dishes and we had VH1

and MTV and I'm watching like, you know, best

of the 80s video show on VH1 and they had Kokomo.

And I saw it's like, Is that Uncle Jesse? That

is Uncle Jesse. Holy shit. Uncle Jesse was playing

with the Beach Boys. And then years later, I

actually looked. It's like John Stamos actually

was like a backup. Yeah, he was. He actually

played with them several occasions. And that's

kind of like one of those things is like, wow,

he's more than an actor. Yes. You've also got

stuff from John Cougar Mellencamp and Ray Vaughan,

Ry Coulter. with All Shook Up, Preston Smith

with Oh I Love You So, and of course Little Richard

with Tutti Frutti. Now those are the ten tracks

that are actually on the soundtracks. The extra

tracks are in the film. So technically it's part

of the soundtrack but not what was released by...

What was released, yes. You've got Addicted to

Love, Robert Palmer, Shelter of Your Love by

Jimmy Cliff, This Magic Moment by Leroy Gibbons,

and when will i be loved by the everly brothers

and they were uncredited doing that song no i

i mean everyone like addicted to love that was

that was still in the pub bar not cell block

i think yeah yeah well as you're doing that and

yeah no that the song like i said this is you

know the 80s was the decade of the soundtrack

and by soundtrack i mean most of this most if

not all The songs on the cocktail soundtrack

are in the movie unlike something you pick up

now where it's from and inspired by So you're

lucky if you get like three scenes out of the

movie that have a note you notice the song You

know because I mean you look they've got entire

soundtracks not just the score but a soundtrack

for the Transformers movies and the only song

on that soundtrack aside from whatever Stan Bush

might contribute to those films is You know,

whatever Chester Bennington and the rest of the

boys from Lincoln Park have decided to squeeze

out that day. Stan Bush had nothing on any of

the Transformers live action. Yeah, but he made

like that new, what's it, Sam song. Yeah, but

that wasn't on the soundtrack. Yeah, he made

that to see if Michael Bay wanted it on the soundtrack,

which he didn't because they went with licensed

music. So yeah, but anyway, Stan had nothing

to do with it. Yeah. but yeah no like i love

the soundtrack uh uh you know it's like i remember

listening to the cassette soundtrack back in

the day i was like where's addicted to love you

know why isn't that on you that was in the movie

so but no i mean i mean what do you like and

not like about cocktail like i okay the just

the pretentiousness of bonnie oh yeah Because

she is the older the older woman versus his his

young man thing just her pretentiousness and

The carrot juice crap and the exercising every

fucking morning You know, I didn't like that

too much The character of Carrie is just god

-awful You know it doesn't matter how hot Kelly

Lynch was I'm sorry that is one of the worst

characters in film I would rather be subjugated

to thousands of ghostwriter sequels than ever

watch that character ever again I don't know

Mike, I don't think we can make it to that second

one that's punishment enough What else don't

I like? I think that's really where it ends.

I don't like her father, but what is so great

about those scenes, her father, I mean Jordan's

father, what is so great about those scenes is

you see that Brian is the bigger man because

he does rip the check up, because he does love

Jordan. He does want to provide for their child,

obviously. What I do like about it is pretty

much everything else. You know, the whole half

-drunk chantilly lace falling downstairs scene.

I absolutely love that. But they are allowed

to fall downstairs. Here, try it. Zoom. There

you go. I love that. Just overall, I just I really

enjoy like this is a movie I can sit down and

I can enjoy it for what it is in 1980s staple.

Oh yeah, that's the thing. You know most of the

most movies in any decade are. are a staple or

an imprint of that decade but I think the 80s

movies are so ingrained in what the 80s was and

how the 80s looked and I think that's one of

the reasons why I absolutely loved it because

it was so it was just so so cool I mean you know

I know Greyhounds and buses and Amtrak's and

trains and all that stuff still exists today

but I mean really who really you know All the

time nowadays you hear about people flying to

and from places or driving to and from places.

Back then, you know, people were taking Greyhounds

into the city or out of the city and stuff like

that. And I don't know, I just, I really love

how the overall story of the movie plays out.

Oh yeah. No, I mean, and just look, I'm just

looking over on the IMDB, like the quotables

line. Like, you know, I left a can of spandex

still that doesn't make it what the one that

was really puzzling to me was from in the Early

in the movie where you see the interview sequence

where Brian's trying out for all these jobs He's

like I'm willing to start at the bottom. You're

aiming too high. Yeah How does that make any

fucking sense? Like he's willing to start like

what I'm assuming is the mailroom Or a copy boy

or something like that's too high like what he's

gonna have three degrees in a couple of years

like fuck you Like that is just the most arrogant

piece of shit that I've ever heard in a movie

Okay, I've probably heard worse, but you get

my point. Yeah No, it's Overall like I love I

do love this movie for a lot of reasons, but

it's mainly Doug Coughlin. I mean He's probably

my absolute favorite thing about the movie outside

of Bryan. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah, totally. I mean,

that's the thing. It's like, you know, at the

end, in the letter, he's like, as for the rest

of Coughlin's laws, ignore them. Just, you know.

just an old guy's sentiments, and I'm paraphrasing

here until I get to the end, an old man's sentiments,

blah blah blah, you know, who was always full

of shit, essentially. And it was just one of

those things where, I don't know, this movie

just kind of spoke to me in like, you know, learning

lessons. You know, granted, it's a movie, it's

make believe, I know that. You know, I'm not

like a lot of today's geeks where they like drawing

the line between fantasy and reality. That's

an inside joke that I'll also explain to JT later.

But overall, I absolutely love Cocktail. It's

a movie I will always watch and thoroughly enjoy

for what it is. Just a classic staple of the

80s just like you know Days of Thunder is a classic

staple of the 80s Top Gun is a classic staple

of the 80s I just really really enjoyed it so

What I did during the episode here I've done

some math and next year is the 25th anniversary

of Cocktail so if they came out with a 25th anniversary

Soundtrack and included those additional four

tracks that would be great I don't think it's

going to happen, but it'd be great. Yeah. So

with that, we are going to go to a commercial

break and we'll come back to close the show after

that. And when you download Stitcher to hear

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It's Stitcher Smart Radio. Don't forget to enter

promo code KEYCASTRADIO when you register. Coughlin's

diet. Cocktails and dreams. Hey, that's not a

bad name for a joint. You know, we really ought

to think about setting up our own place. That

takes money. The kind of money your sacred books

dangle but never deliver. They deliver. Just

got to know how to read Come on we could make

a fortune I mean, that's why you came to New

York that sure as hell why I left Queens positive

positive thinking You can't let a little thing

like cash stand in our way cocktails and dreams

cocktails and dreams I say it in pink neon blink

blink pinkity blink That is a little corny, isn't

it? Double don't worry Be happy I'm Chuck. And

I'm Justin. Join the four of us every week on

the internet's number one and longest -running

GI Joe podcast, What's On Joe Mind? It's Joe

news, reviews, and interviews like you've never

heard them before delivered right to your mp3

player. Our guests include Jason Marsden, Kevin

Michael Richardson, and Matt Yang King from GI

Joe Renegades, Larry Hama, Robert Adkins, and

John Barber from IDW Publishing, and many more

from around the online Joe community. Yeah, it's

guys talking about Joe. Think of it as Joe Talk

meets Sports Talk. And we make fun of Chuck.

Right, and we, hey, again? Come on, Chuck. We're

just kidding, kinda. Sometimes Chuck makes fun

of himself. Right, and we, okay, seriously, this

is just getting ridiculous now. It's What's on

Joe Mind, every week on the Geekcast Radio Network,

InsidePulse .com, Stitcher Smart Radio, and iTunes.

Download and listen today. I suppose I still

can't say something about Transformers, can I?

Come on, man. Good grief. What about sports?

Yeah, that's alright. Jesus, everything ends

badly. Otherwise it wouldn't end. So we are back

and closing thoughts on Cocktail, sir. I like

the movie a lot. Like I said in the show, there's

a few things that makes my blood curdle like

bad milk. But overall, it's an enjoyable movie

to watch. It's Doesn't like it If you take it

too seriously, you're kind of missing the point

of any movie Yeah, so I just gonna say like,

you know, if you're a kid a child of the 80s

more than likely you're gonna like it but you

know entirely up to you anyhow, so Yeah, I'm

just saying, you know watch it and Make your

own decisions Yeah, I totally agree with that

Same thing for me as I you know, I There are

certain aspects of it where I will fast -forward

like, you know, the old lady scenes and stuff

like that But overall, I think it's a well thought

out Plot and it's it's essentially a buddy movie

It really is and when you really boil it down

because it's more so about their friendship Then,

well, it starts out with being their friendship

between Brian and Doug, and then it turns into

Brian and Jordan's romance at the end, obviously.

If you want a staple of the 80s, get this and

watch it. And as we said, the soundtrack is just

amazing. Off air, I implanted a... A weed in

JT's brain because he said during the show he's

like as soon as I hear even two seconds of that

song I can't forget it. I was like, okay, I'm

gonna hurt you somebody Alright so that's it

for us here on MWire you got anything you want

to pimp out before we Before we close the show

out not right now. No, unfortunately not already

then Of course, for you, the listeners of Movie

Week in Review, Audible is offering a free audiobook

download with free 30 -day trial to give you

an opportunity to check out their service. Use

audibletrial .com slash GeekCastRadio. We hope

you enjoyed this episode of MWR, and we shall

join us next time when we will be finally finishing

our 80s films with the classic. The guy who can't

decide on anything he wants to do in life. And

he's got a bullet car. As well as Macaulay Culkin's

debut when we do episode 89, Uncle Buck. For

now, I am TFG1 Mike with... JT from South Tattoo.

Are you thung -fied now? Thank you for listening.

Until next time, keep those film reels reelin'.

or rollin' or whatever. Shit, I fucked it up.

Not dignified to get this drunk. You are in training.

I'm in training. For stardom. For stardom. I

don't care how liberated this world becomes.

A man will always be judged on the amount of

alcohol he can consume. Always. And a woman will

be impressed whether she likes it or not. Now

come on. I'm not gonna make it. You are. A star

never pukes or passes out in public. No. Holy

shit. Hey, are you okay? You alive? However,

falling downstairs is allowed. Wanna see a grown

man cry like a baby? Hey Bartender, you know

how to make a red eye? What, no tearful greeting?

Coughlin's law. Never show surprise, never lose

your cool. Ah, my sons. My rebellious sons. Tell

your old buddy how great he looks. You look like

a guy who dyes his hair and shades with a brillo

pad. The guy who gets an erection on his birthday

if the wind is right. Isn't this great? Two years

we haven't seen each other and we just flow into

the old act. Please, stop molesting the customers.

A daiquiri, if you will, bartender. I taught

this young man everything he knows. I doubt that.

Don't you waste your loyalty on him. He'll dump

you after Valentine's Day. Isn't that clever?

What the hell are you doing down here? This lad

is the best bartender south of 14th Street. It's

his downfall. I don't see how being good at something

can be your downfall. Thank you. I grant you,

it's not an easy concept to grasp. Now, you take

our hero here. I haven't seen him for a while,

and I've never been in this joint before, but

I will bet my bile duck he's got some kind of

success manual behind the bar. Come on, Flanagan.

I know it's here. Touche. Voila. You see, Flanagan's

a believer. Always will be. He doesn't realize

the doors are shut to people like us. Well, maybe

he wants to open them. Then he has to steal a

key, sweetheart. Something Coughlin here has

been unable to do. You know, there's a guy who

makes these. One guy? He must be exhausted. Yes,

he is. But still, he gets up in the morning and

he kisses his wife and he goes to his drink umbrella

factory and rips off ten billion of these a year.

This guy's a millionaire. How about the guy who

makes these? How about that guy? You mentioned

him. The guy who makes these. And those little

wrappers are made by another guy? What about

these plastic things at the end of these laces?

Mm. It's probably got one of those weird names,

too, like, uh, Lugalbinder or something. Lugalbinder,

right. We sit here, and we're surrounded by millionaires.

You rack your brains day and night to try to

come up with a money -making scheme, and some

guy corners the flugalbinder market. Aw, poor

baby. He's... Frustrated. You get a bar job to

keep your days free for your real gig. After

work, you're so charged up, have a few drinks.

You know, hey, it's party time. Days get shorter

and shorter, nights longer and longer. Before

you know it, your life is just one long night

with a few comatose daylight hours. Stop feeling

so sorry for yourself, Flanagan. Hey, Doug, take

it easy, huh? Relax. The luck is gone, the brain

is shot, but the liquor we still got. My dearest

Brian, a guy like me looks in the mirror. He

either grins or he starts to fade away. And I

haven't seen anything to grin about in a long

time. This may not be the most graceful exit,

but I know when the bottle's empty. But the only

thing I'm really gonna miss is the conversations

we had going. At least I get the last word, even

if I had to mail it in. Coughlin's law. Bury

the dead, they stink up the joint. As for the

rest of Coughlin's laws, ignore them. The guy

was always full of shit. But I guess you knew

that already. This poem is entitled, Flanagan's

advice to his unborn child. Now, if Jordan gives

birth to a fine Irish son, there'll be cocktails

and dreams for him one day to run. A business

that shall yield a financial windfall. It better!

To be franchised in every... suburban shopping

mall. A dynasty! You're burning a dynasty! Now,

if a daughter arrives to bless our clan, I guess

the shit will certainly hit the fan. But this

I shall promise to thee. I'll never let her marry

a guy like me. But still... If our child's the

naughtiest of girls or the wildest of young men,

I swear I'll be the best dad I can and never

ever get spooked again. Bet I can still spook

you. No way. Twins?