WrestleMania 36 Review

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hidden. This is such good shit. Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to the podcast arena. Coming to the ring

at this time... Oh, you didn't know? You know

I better call somebody! First, representing this

week at Geek, and from parts unknown, he is...

Mike, the Birdman. This is what you asked for,

right? This is what you wanted. Hello and welcome

to Mayhem Mikes. I'm of course TFU and Mike.

Joining me is Mike the Birdman Dodd. Hello, sir.

Oh my God, you dragged me back for this. But

yes, I am indeed here. Yes, you are here. And

also joining us is Alex the producer. Hello,

sir. Yeah. The only person in our group of what

of all of our friends that are like 10 or 12

of us that are chatting. I'm the only one that

watched it live. I'd also like to point out that

my disinterest in WrestleMania has reached a

peak because before this show recorded, I decided

to take some of my THC edibles. So this will

be an experience for both you and I. Should have

taken them before the show started like before.

Oh, believe me. I did. Oh good lord Then it the

three and a half hour second day must have felt

like ten hours Oh my god That being said seeing

John Cena argue with a hand puppet was amusing

I'll grant you that. Yes, but I think we're getting

a little ahead of ourselves. So yeah, here's

a couple for anybody listening. How did we all

watch this? I'll start out. I signed up for the

WWE Network for another free trial under a completely

different account, you know, because you can't

use your same email twice. And I'm like, okay.

And then I forgot that because I'm in Canada,

they want me to have a cable subscription to

be able to access it. And I went No, so I had

to use a VPN to get around it to get my free

trial up and running and then I watched it laying

in bed Watching it on a PlayStation 4 and almost

fell asleep two or three times. I realized that

laying in bed was a bad choice And my experience

was watching it completely live no breaks No,

no being able to fast forward and not being able

to leave because I wanted to experience the whole

thing and what that entailed was Uh, including

the pre show four hours on day one and four hours

and 23 minutes on day two. Good Lord. Um, I watched

this via, um, a friend's WWE network accounts

on Monday and Tuesday, uh, as of this week's

recording and, uh, well, that was a thing. That

was, that, that was the most certainly a thing.

This could have been truncated in so many different

ways. And that really disappoints me. Cause I

remember when I used to hang out with Alex and

he'd come, um, and we'd do wrestling pay per

views, but we'd never do mania. That was always

him and his friends thing. Um, but we'd always

chat back and forth. What was going on this year

was Yeah, mania and summer slam. I had other

group of friends that I had been hanging out

with beforehand and they just dropped off the

map anyway too. But we tried to make a point

of pretty much everything else. Uh, except I

think we'll, yeah, we did a couple of rumbles

at your place, but, um, the rest were at my place,

but like it got to the point where we were only

doing like two a year. Yeah. Like this one, like

this was, I mean, obviously this is a historic

year for many. unfortunate reasons, but this

was certainly a WrestleMania. So let's get to

Mike. And then I guess we'll go into the situation

surrounding this WrestleMania such as it was.

Yes. So for me, because I just, I don't know,

I watched it through some other means, let's

just say, um, some other sort of edited means,

but I still watched it and it was there were

certain things I did like but we have a few few

things to get out of the way first here um as

of this recording this actually won't be released

until the 13th of April but as of this recording

we are two days ago we celebrated five years

of this podcast I didn't think you and I were

gonna make it five years Mike Yeah. WWE is killing

us. It really is. Cause you know what? I used

to be really hype, like coming into 2014 and

you know, I was pretty excited for like the whole

Daniel Bryan yes movement. And as I explained

when I came back a few podcasts ago, I got interested

again, but then Alex and I had a really frank

discussion last summer. Um, about me and WWE

Network. And he's like, why do you pay for something

that you hate? And I'm like, you know what, you've

got a really good point. I'd be much happier

with the 12 or $13. And now I spend that on comic

books and I'm significantly happier. Yeah, yeah.

Our discussion was, hey, why don't you just subscribe

for when you when you hear about a pay -per -view

that sounds good. It's not like it used to be

where you had to pay like 50 or 60 bucks. It's

just like, oh, I'll just pay $10 to watch WrestleMania.

Yeah. Um, so yeah, this year, um, was historic

for many reasons. Obviously the big pink elephant

in the room or the big pink big show in the room

is this is the result of the COVID -19 pandemic,

which is affecting everywhere across the world.

As of this recording, 1 .2 plus million cases

reported 100 or tens of thousands of dead. unfortunately.

And the United States response has not been great,

but particularly in Florida, they were delaying

this thing till the last possible frigging second.

So eventually WrestleMania got moved to a two

night event where they shot it at the, at the

performance center over the course of like a

week. So things kind of got out here and there.

I don't know whether there were too many spoilers

or not, but regardless, people like Roman Reigns

got pulled because he has leukemia and if he

gets the COVID, not good. He's gone, yeah. The

Miz had a fever the day of. That's why that tag

team match turned into a ladder match with the

three guys. Which, I mean, obviously with the

WWE performers being in such close contact, exchanging

bodily fluids such as it may be, It's a wonder

any of them haven't gotten sick yet. Well, that's

the thing. Everybody's watching is the Miz because

they have, they said he had a fever and that

was it. They won't comment on it. Um, I'm assuming

he's okay. But the, the thing was, um, he had

a fever and he's also got like two babies at

home. So I'm assuming he's like way off somewhere

on his own recovering because he can't risk anything,

but it's kind of surprising with, in light of

all this, that none of the major companies. any

of them. None of them have anybody that's been

affected so far. You know, knock on wood. It's

only been a couple. You hear about like indie

wrestlers that contracted it, but that's from

other means. Yeah. By the way, breaking news.

Speaking of WWE, we just got an interview offered

to us with Mandy Rose. Really sweet. Yeah. Um,

we'll talk about this off air I guess but breaking

news. So Interesting. Thank you random PR people.

Okay, like me. We'll see what happens All right,

so the kickoff match for night one was Cesaro

versus Drew Gulak This is how far down Cesaro

has fallen in five years or six years since I've

been watching It's crazy. Like I was like, wait

a minute. Didn't he used to be a champion? Yep.

He used to be a guy. He used to be a Paul Heyman

guy. And now he's like, I hang around Shinsuke

Nakamura. He's basically like, he was one of

like before, you know what, what it was when

Tyson kid got hurt and then his career trajectory

went to crap because they were for about a year,

the best tag team in the company. Yep, they were.

And I would argue Cesaro's charm, because when

he got talking a little bit later on, he got

a lot better on Mike. Tyson Kidd, great performer

in the ring, but no charisma on Mike. But Cesaro,

yeah, he's just become steadily a joke as time

has gone on, which is really unfortunate because

he's always been one of my favorite guys to watch,

especially when he gets a chance to really cut

loose. Um, but now he's a sidekick and so Shinsuke

Nakamura now, but we'll talk about that match.

Yeah. I would say one last thing on Cesar. The

reason he's in the position he's in and he hasn't

laughed is they keep paying him good money because

he speaks five languages. So they can use him

for every promo, basically for every region of

Europe. It's like, you need somebody to speak

German. Sure. I'll do it. You need somebody to

speak French. I'll do it. Okay. No problem. You

need somebody to speak Swiss. I'll do it. Like

he can, he can. capture so many different markets.

Uh, you know, it doesn't say much for his, uh,

his position in the company though, it seems.

Yeah. And I'll, and I'll say this. I mean, I

enjoyed the match. Um, and it's, this is something

that's going to come up as we continue to talk

about this two night event, watching a WrestleMania

with no audience with nobody in the, in the seats

in the whatever. It's stranger than watching

regular Raw and SmackDown or any AEW shows because

that's their crown. That's WWE's crown is WrestleMania

and they always boast about and Cody even made

fun of it on AEW. We've got 80 ,000 fans when

there's really 60 or whatever it is, but it's

one of those things where it's like, holy crap,

there's nobody, there's no crowd noise, which

means you hear it. everything, not just what

they're saying, but what they're doing and how

their bodies are hitting that mat. And it's crazy.

There was something I actually, I'm really glad

you kind of brought this up because a lot of

the matches this entire weekend, you could tell

certain performers do okay with no audience.

Like they'll still give it their all. I mean,

think what you want about say Baron or King Corbin

and, um, Elias, those guys gave a good match

despite no audience compared to the women's,

um, tag team titles, which was the Kabuki warriors,

which my God racist, um, versus Alexa bliss and

Nikki cross later on. Those people need an audience.

They're still like, you think there's an audience

there like, like doing the whole, come on. And

like trying to raise the crowd like, or not just

that it's just how. the gibberish they spout

like it's not about like you can yell at your

opponent and you can tell a story and have a

dialogue and do, but they're just chanting the

same sort of stuff that they would do to try

to get the crowd riled up. Yeah, here it comes

off as weird. It comes off as weird, but I think

also it's more of that's what you're supposed

to be doing because like you look at Asuka, you

look at Kyrie, you look at Alexa and Nikki, Alexa

especially, since she debuted, she's always played

up to the crowd, whether she was a heel or a

face, it doesn't matter which she's better as

a heel, obviously. But she's always playing up

to that crowd. And when there's no crowd, and

you have to figure out how to rewire your entire

brain and muscle memory and all that, I think

Alex said it in our in our Facebook chat the

other day, it's basically just the muscle memory

of what you already do if there was an actual

audience there. Well, and taking into account

the vast majority of the women in the division,

and even a lot of the guys now, if they've only

been with the company a few years, a lot of them

got their start directly with WWE. They've been

trained on only to do things one way. Right.

They didn't travel around and learn from the

Indies or go to Japan or Mexico. So they've only

ever dealt with crowds that... uh, are WWE crowds

that are like conditioned to like a certain thing.

Well, that's what happens when you're farmed

through tough enough and then, and, and nothing

against tough enough or NXT or any of that, nothing

against it. But that's what happens when you

are applying to the world wrestling entertainment

company, you go through tough enough where you

go through NXT and you come up through their

thing. Sometimes they let you go off, but most

times they don't. Only one person. in five years

has gone straight from being signed to main roster.

And that's AJ Styles. And we'll talk about him

later. And, you know, had he not done his Japan

stint, it probably wouldn't have happened. But

at the same time, he's like, some of these people,

they say they're vets, you know, in quotes, because

it's like, oh, they work for TNA. It's like,

yeah, but TNA would record maybe 30 days out

of a year. And then they were doing their indie

shows. But when some of these guys like AJ went

over to Japan, they're working three nights a

week. They're working, like, doing the same thing

they do in the WWE. Or if they come from Mexico,

same deal. But these these girls, oh, they were

so bad. And you could hear every you can hear

them whispering, OK, now pull my hair. And I'm

like, oh, come on. I had to turn my headphones

down because I'm like, I can hear them saying

what they're supposed to be doing. It's like,

all right, now flip and grab this. And it's like,

stop. There's some, there's microphones everywhere.

And some of the refs are really bad for that

too. There was a point in that match, the tag

team match, and then one of the other ones where

I could hear Vince McMahon yelling in Michael

Cole's ear. Oh, wow. The mics were so hot and

I had my headphones turned up. You could hear

him muttering commands into and stage directions

into Michael Cole's ear. And then Michael Cole

two, three seconds later saying what he was told

to say. Hmm. That's another thing too. Like,

like because there is no crowd noise and it's

just them hitting the mat. You could hear some

of the spots being called out pretty obviously.

I noticed this a lot during, um, unfortunately,

um, the women's tag team titles on night one,

there were more than a few spots that I heard

them saying, okay, are you ready? Sort of thing.

Um, plus just some bad spots in general and It

really bothers me because I like the look of

Kari Sane, and I don't say that in a disgusting

kind of pervy way. I think she looks cool, but

Asuka has talent, and I don't think the other

one really does. Correct me if I'm wrong. She's

like 85 pounds, and her whole deal is that she

looks like a pirate. Yeah, I mean, it'd be different

if she was super athletic and could do like ninja

moves or something, but... i think that's the

thing i think they need to get cuz i remember

and i remember enjoying kary when ryan and i

think it was the first may young classic or what

she was on one of the first may young classics

first or second when i think it was the first

one i'm pretty sure yeah i think so um you know

i remember seeing her and i remember really liking

her i think now that she's at main roster and

she's with oscar as say what you will about the

name but the kabuki warriors um I think she just

needs a slight character change. I don't, I mean,

Ninja Kairi would be cool as hell to me, like

switching from a pirate to a ninja. Ninjas are

better than pirates anyway. Her and Asuka. Yeah,

that'd be really cool. Her and Asuka have been

in the country like four or five years. They

need to learn English. They're at a point now

where they need to have a manager. They let Asuka

speak. She speaks a little bit and then they're

just like all right speak a little bit and then

switch to Japanese squirrel girl racism gibberish

and Because yeah, if you ask people that speak

Japanese, she's not speaking anything. It's literally

racism gibberish Yeah, that's the problem sometimes

it's real there or the best thing is when they

do speak actual Japanese They're yelling out

their shots to each other what to do. So any

any Japanese fan or anybody who understands Japanese

will know how the match is going to go because

they're literally speaking in plain, you know,

plain English or plain language, what they're

going to do next. Yeah. The one thing about this

match besides the athleticism between the four

women that I noticed was the constant, um, referee

warning Asuka. And she's like, I know, I know.

Like, like really. Wow, it really makes a difference

when there is no crowd. Now, correct me if I'm

wrong here, because you and Alex would know better.

Is Nikki Cross just a happier person now? Because

she seemed a little too bouncy and happy with

Alexa Bliss during this. It was kind of weird.

It's a little odd. I think she's a terrible wrestler,

like just absolutely abysmal. I think she used

to be OK, like from what I remember seeing her

when she was a lot more aggressive. But now she

seems to run. The thing is, she runs in place

like a cartoon character winding up their legs

to run at you. So which is so like the hedgehog.

Yes, which is the most stupid thing I've ever

seen in my life. She has the first design of

Sonic the Hedgehog. Yeah, she has no moves. She

just runs at somebody and then gets thrown around

and does nothing like. Yeah. Was she the girl

that had, was she the girl that had like the

Tomb Raider look for like a year or whatever?

Is that the one that I'm thinking of or somebody

else? See, I usually get her confused with say

the one Sarah Logan, the one that was Sarah Logan.

That's who I'm thinking of. Yeah, that's the

thing. Sarah Logan had the tan, I don't want

to say brassier, but basically it was a... The

booty short, right? Yeah, it was the booty shorts

and the and the the crop top bra kind of thing

or something. Yeah. So she did have the tumor.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Because for with like this

match like Nikki cross when her and bliss came

down to the ring. It just had this really weird

energy like they had just come out of gorilla

position and we're just gossiping and they were

not taking this very seriously. I mean, obviously

as the match went on, it got a little bit better.

I've always liked bliss. Um, when you give her

something to do or she's with the right person,

I think she can perform, but if you mismatch

her with the wrong person, yikes. Um, but ultimately

this one was kind of a snore fest. None of them

have enough experience between like, like Oscar

might have more, I think over She had a couple

years in Japan before she came over But if you

add up all of their like all four participants

if you add up their years of experience somebody

like John Cena has more or somebody like like

and there are people that have around the same

like like Charlotte flair, but they're just infinitely

better, but so with that match out of the way

I knew I was like, oh we're in for some crap

Up next Elias versus King Corbin Fast forward

I Actually, yeah, we don't have to spend too

much time on this I'm gonna say this is probably

the first time and I haven't watched like I haven't

I Haven't actively watched raw or smackdown until

we were preparing for this in months But I You

know, I gotta say though. It's probably the first

time ever since Elias has been on roster that

I actually actually liked what he was doing.

He hasn't ever wrestled as far as I know until

this. True. Elias? Yeah, this is one of the first

times I've ever seen him fight. He would come

in, he would throw like a clothesline and bash

something over your head and that was it or get

knocked out. I think this is the first real match

he's had ever. And I mean, it wasn't terrible.

You know what he reminds me of? Like if he was

still alive, people would have been like, He

would have been branded as like macho man jr.

Or something because he has that late 90s macho

man on way too many steroids look You know what

I mean? We're like the veins are popping out

of his head like bone saw is ready sort of thing

Hey, that's what that's what he looks like if

you just gave him if you dyed his hair jet black

like like shoe polish black and Then gave him

the sunglasses and the hat He's basically macho

man. Hmm Baron Corbin Oh, there's so many bad

things I want to say about him, but it won't

make it to air. But basically, I wish he would

go off somewhere and then never show up again.

And not because like, here's the thing. He's

a bad guy. He's playing a king, but he's playing

a king in like a children's TV show. Yeah, it's

kind of weird because they want to go for this

Game of Thrones King of the North look like he's

supposed to be like fucking Ned Stark, but he

comes across as just a little too goofy for that

role he's acting like he's on like like like

peewees playhouse or like like he's like i'm

i'm an evil king from mr roger's neighborhood

like basically who who he is who he reminds me

of is um i forget which animaniac special this

was but um he's basically the duke of dun likeus

there was a time it was a Episode of Animaniacs

where they had this this evil villain ruler guy.

It was one of the movies He was the king or something

rather and he reminds me of that guy Well, and

he does he has no charisma. He can't wrestle.

He can't talk. He just it's weird I've only ever

heard Corbin do an interview I listened to an

interview he did like late last year and it was

just him out of characters him talking as Whatever

his real name is And he was surprisingly articulate

and charismatic, yet you never see him look more

than an aggressive Olive Garden waiter when he

was in his normal Baron Corbin outfit. And then

when he became King Corbin, as Alex said, like

a PBS type after school special King. It's kind

of weird. He's part of that group of either be

fat or be fit or be gigantic muscular. You can't

be a string bean. And he looks like a string

bean. Yep. Up next, the raw women's championship

match, Becky Lynch versus Shayna Baszler. Oh

my God. The lead up to this match. It's like,

Hey, needed a crowd so bad. They shouldn't have

used the truck. they should the truck was cool

but they shouldn't have used the truck uh but

the lead up to this because again like i said

and i'm probably gonna say this again i repeat

myself a lot folks i have not been watching so

the preview that they gave to you know to catch

people up they really want to compete with aew

because she bit the crap out of what it looks

like i'm sure she actually didn't because you

know hello that would be stupid you could get

coronavirus like that I don't know, whatever.

Point is, she bit the hell out of Becky's neck

in the... She bit the hell out of her neck and

magically her neck has no scars. Also has no

bandage because they don't even bother selling

anything. Oh, one final thing for the Elias one,

in the go -home show before Mania... Elias was

thrown off a 15 foot roof onto the ground and

was taken away in a stretcher and he came to

this WrestleMania without a limp, without anything.

No reference to it other than the video that

they packaged where they showed him falling.

Dude fell 15 feet, was carried away in a stretcher

and it was like nothing happened. That's not

cool. Although I will say at least those two

tried to put on a show. I felt the energy was

there from a performing standpoint. I don't know.

They need a crowd for sure. Yeah, like although

these two to their credit Tried as best they

possibly could it's just whoever wrote this match

There it wasn't compelling to me anyway and a

WrestleMania every match outside of the go take

a piss match Which is clear this one was supposed

to be should mean something half of these matches

were go take a dump in a shower and shave matches

Yeah, this is a perfect time to browse Reddit.

They were all waiting on every single match in

WrestleMania this year should have been 10 minutes

or less There was no reason to make anything

longer than that and this one Really accentuates

how Shayna Baszler has no charisma. She knows

she doesn't she's a great wrestler like as far

as real life, you know us wrestler and You know

Becky Lynch has great has great charisma, but

they both aren't to the level where they can

perform without a crowd I thought this match

was actually okay. Um, this one actually kind

of stuck out to me as it was somewhat memorable,

but you're right. They need someone to bounce

it like, cause performing in front of a crowd

brings up the energy, brings up the intensity.

It's, I don't know. It's like any actor who steps

in front of the camera. You're willing to give

that extra 10 % to get you over that hundred

mark. So you're right it just it needed more

but it should have but i'm i'm happy with the

way that it it it ended it was solid as far as

the match goes just it was hard what was the

next one again i i'm drawing a blank next one

was intercontinental yeah next one was intercontinental

between sammy and daniel bryan oh boy okay here

you go before we go into this uh so birdman did

you ever think that daniel bryan would put on

one of the worst matches of WrestleMania, let

alone beyond like third or fourth out of an eight

hour show. No, I like my Marys of Daniel Bryan.

I hold that guy in pretty high esteem and as

a Daniel Bryan mark. This is pretty disappointing

and to see him perform the yes chant to a grand

total of two people and Camera people was sad

pathetic in in its own way The thing that made

this match hurt even more not just Daniel Bryan

looking sad. Yeah Daniel Bryan is What happened

when Sammy Zane comes out which by the I still

loves Sammy Zane's pop punk Scott intro music

He's gotten great as far as his like mic skills

way better than I ever thought. Oh God. Yeah.

Oh yeah. Like he is a wonderful heel. He's hilarious,

but I love how he has like, do you guys remember?

I can't remember what cartoon we're showing.

I think it was like, um, Sylvester and Tweety

and there'd be those two angry looking cats that

would hang out with the dog or either way, some

dog had sidekicks. I like how Sammy Zayn has

sidekicks of Shinsuke Nakamura, who used to be

one of my favorite guys. Now he's reduced to

a sidekick role. Cesaro, one of the most promising

people in the company for years. Now he's reduced

to a Acme Wiley Coyote gag. My God. This sucks.

WWE is going down the toilet, man. It's just

crazy. And people, I don't know. how many of

the people that are actually listening to this

have been listening to us for the last five years

that we've been doing this show. But I know we

haven't had very many episodes in the last six

months or so, or the last year and a half or

so. I wonder how many people are actually wondering

if we're even going to continue on with this

show because WWE has gotten - Oh, we will. Well,

we will. It's just, yes, yes, yes. I know, I

know, but I'm saying like, because we're saying

so many, and they're all true, like, don't get

us wrong, folks. we absolutely love and respect

and whatever the wrestlers and all this and all

that but the writing the storylines the writing

all of that and just some of the decisions well

one of the worst parts about this match i mean

sammy zane as we just said is wonderful on the

mic But when you don't have the crowd noise mixed

in with him talking, it takes away from the mass,

as in all you're hearing is Zayn Zayn. Please

don't hit me. Oh, no, Brian, don't do this. If

you notice that his look has changed, he's he

started to look like a mixture between that.

What was the name of the bully on the cartoon

Doug? Mixer between that that guy. Oh, yeah.

Skeeter, not Skeeter. The other guy. Yeah. whatever

the cloths or something like that um he looks

he looks like that guy mixed with crusty the

clown hair oh my god yeah like i i don't get

what they're going for here i mean did you notice

something too the the lapses of logic in every

one of these matches like for instance um what's

his name the Daniel Bryan Jr. Sidekick knocks

out the other two guys and he must have kicked

them so hard they went into another street because

they disappeared for five minutes completely

off screen. That's crazy. Yeah, this was disappointing

to say the least. And I never thought I'd see

a bad Daniel Bryan match, especially at WrestleMania.

But Jesus. Yeah. Next up was the Smackdown Tag

Team Championship Triple Threat Ladder Match.

John Morrison. This was fucking gold. Yeah, this

was really good. Think about how good this would

have been with the crowd. Yeah, exactly. So it

was John Morrison versus Kofi Kingston and Jimmy

Uso of the Usos. And John obviously retained.

But wow. This was really this is one of the better

ladder matches I've seen in at least seven years.

I normally hate ladder matches because I think

they're gimmicky and stupid until I saw this

one. I was legitimately impressed with all the

athletics, with all the story that was being

told. There was a lot of great back and forth.

A lot of this shit looked like it hurt. So, yeah,

it was just really cool. Plus, this is one of

the few times I've seen. I think Alex said this

guy used to be known as Johnny Mundo for a while.

He goes wherever he is. He changes his name.

So like he was, uh, Johnny nitro Johnny impact,

uh, Johnny impact for whatever show he's on.

I'm surprised he's not being called Johnny raw

right now, but that might be a little sexually

sounding. As I say, that's kind of party. Yeah,

I mean, this like seeing these guys do the stuff.

Like there's one spot where Johnny walks across

the ropes from one turnbuckle to another then

jumps off. I think with like J. So wrapped around

him or was it Jimmy? I can't Jimmy, Jimmy. So

and it looked fan. The flips they were doing

and landing like it's the kind of stuff you see

the really tiny guys do from like lucha But they're

these guys are all like 200 ish pound Yeah And

like the big deal here is these guys aren't like

steroid II so they can actually move So some

of the, and just the sound of when like they're,

when they fall and hit the ladders and that it's

way creepier sounding because there's no crowd

there. So it's just like, you're like, Oh, well

they just hit metal and something hurt. And then

I think I heard, was it Uso or one of them when

he landed? I mean, you could hear like the wind

get knocked out of them. And he's just like,

Oh yeah. And then the cameras turn away and then

they're like, I know I heard it. I know I heard

Uso at one point he he gets jumped by Morrison

I think it is and he gets driven no wait it was

Kingston Kingston hit him with with the ladder

and he says I'm sorry man but I got to keep you

down or something along those lines and he drills

them right in the gut with it and Uso goes down

to the pavement and I am pretty sure I heard

him say fuck because it sounded like it really

hurt me hurt yeah up next is um i know alex wait

wait sorry and good and yeah we should say who

won so it's uh mundo john in a yeah whatever

his name is now he retains in a funny way at

least like he basically falls with with the titles

yeah that was hilarious Up next in the my lovely

cohorts here will probably disagree with me on

this but Honestly, this is one of the better

matches of night one for me Kevin Owens versus

Seth Rollins and Kevin Owens won by DQ and then

he won with no DQ I Just love seeing these three

work You mean, uh, it's Kevin Owens versus that

lady in that old viral video where she's tripped

with his crushing grapes? Because all we hear

is Seth Rollins going, Oh, I think I heard him

say my ribs. Yeah. Fakest sounding selling ever.

Yeah, it is the fakest sell, but Seth. Oh my

God. When did he become Jesus by the way? I don't

know. He's the Monday night Messiah now. I have

no clue. It was the first week of the new TV

deals. Oh, of course. Okay, because the last

time Birdman saw Seth Rollins, he was known as

the Kingslayer and now he's Monday night Messiah

with a Michael Jackson glove at one point. I

was very confused when I saw this. He stayed

on USA on Mondays and um he came out with white

on and he's like i'm the monday night messiah

love me praise me something like that but he

yeah he doesn't hate but he has that nasally

way he talks that just doesn't sound right i

just love seeing kevin owen's work I think that

guy is still still a huge, huge talent. I think

both of them are still a huge, huge talent. Say

what you will about Seth's storyline and whatever

else and all that. But I love seeing the two

of those guys work together. Having him. Kevin

Owens has been even better in the last, what,

two years or so since he dropped about 50 pounds

because he was always able to do crazy summer

assaults and stuff. But like. As he's going to

get older and getting closer to 40, it was going

to get harder and harder to do that when he was

sitting at what, like, he was probably nearly

300 pounds at one point. And he's, he's not ever

going to be trim, but he's like really athletic

for what he can do. And the flips and the jumps,

like the Kevin Owens we saw five years ago or

more. you would not have seen jumping off the

top of the the sign like it would have been unsafe

for him to do that yeah it would be very unsafe

for him to do that it's still unsafe now well

that's what i love the way he landed i showed

my brother today and my brother starts cackling

laughing and he goes oh he hit his elbow right

on the side of his ribs and that's where where

you can hear Seth go, my ribs. Yep. You can see

he landed not 100 % right. And you see the weird

cuts they had to use? Because this wasn't live,

they cut, I think he hit him pretty hard in the

wrong spot. And I think he did too. Then they

had to move it to show that it was, you know,

to make it a little less, not that they don't

want violence, but I think it was going to show

that he hit like with his elbow. They might've,

I think they might've reset where they were.

think they did too because this was something

and this is again like I understand why they

want to do stuff like this why they want people

to at WrestleMania go off signs or go off a cage

or something like that I get it but if you land

wrong not intentionally because it sure as hell

isn't Kevin Owens intention to hurt Seth Rollins

I mean not at all well right but I'm saying he's

not He landed wrong. It wasn't that Yeah, wrong

or he hit him too hard, but it wasn't the fact

that like Kevin Owens is like, oh I'm gonna do

this and I don't he's not one of these Inexperienced

wrestlers. Yeah would do that and not give a

shit is my point He's a guy who I would trust

because he seems pretty yeah. I have absolutely

Well, you feel like the way he jumped I feel

it was at a weird angle. The table wasn't directly

in front of them. It was at an angle. So you

have to launch up into the left instead of going

straight down. So you've got that going against

you. And then also the way they cut it and they

did this for the few matches. I think people

were screwing up left and right. And normally,

you know, you just deal with it, but then, you

know, Vince, now that they have the ability to

tape. I swear, I think he didn't hurt him, hurt

him, but I think he knocked the wind out of him.

And I would be surprised because that abrupt

cut, the way like he lands and then it's immediately

cut to a different angle that they shouldn't

have been prepared for. And I didn't remember

seeing a camera there ready. I feel like I think

they paused for like two minutes to get up, let

him catch his breath and then started recording

again. By the end of this match Seth Rollins

still couldn't breathe so something was Obviously

from this this jump off the sign to this hit

and whatever else and this is what? Anyone that

says that wrestling is fake now Today because

there is currently no audience. They're all fucking

liars. Yes, it is choreographed Yes, it is planned

out but this move right now shows that Kevin

Owens and Seth Rollins they Like Mike said could

have killed, you know, he could have killed him,

but he didn't obviously he just injured him to

the point of whatever but with no crowd it's

much more Apparent of what these superstars do

what these yeah. Well, I don't care what more

people don't get caught up doing like Ladder

matches for example because like if you bend

that steel that steel can Bend a certain way

that it will cut you well people do you notice?

They don't use they don't use the very big guys

anymore. Like you're not seeing Bubba Dudley

doing that You know what I mean back when Bubba

was 400 pounds Like when he was when he was 400

pounds and he was doing that they were getting

cut up every time Yeah, but the reason you didn't

notice it was because we had standard def TVs

tube TVs that were 480i So you saw that's right.

You didn't see we're like all the micro cuts

and all the bruises. Mm -hmm Up next was and

don't get me wrong folks. I am a huge New England

Patriots fan I have been since I came out of

my mother's room in Massachusetts back in 1980,

but Rob Gronkowski was the host And he and Mojo

Raleigh were kind of tag teaming the hosting

duties. And apparently Mojo defeated R -Truth

for the 24 -7 title. Which, by the way, R -Truth

is the most entertaining person in the entire

company. He was more entertaining in 30 seconds

than the rest of the entire show. But with that

Gronk guy, again, I don't know anything about

him. I don't know about football really, but

here's the thing. He came across as like... Are

you sure he's not like one of the make -a -wish

kids? They're just helping? They signed him to

the company, but I'm like, is he special needs?

Because he's trying to talk like Hulk Hogan,

but then he comes across as like a dumb goof.

I think he tried something and it didn't work.

It's his first time. I mean, I'm not going to

give him too much of a whatever. He signed on

as a full -time wrestler now. And this is how

they debuted him. Wow. Well, I didn't know that.

Yeah. From what I understand, Gronk, um, was

a former NFL guy. Obviously they wanted to sign

them to be WWE. Now as a guy who's trained to

be on camera, like that's what I went to school

for though. I specialize in radio watching Gronkowski.

He doesn't have the on camera. skills yet like

obviously I'm surprised they gave him this but

because they spent so much money to sign him

he probably asked and they probably didn't have

anything millions of dollars for a multi -year

contract yeah so he was signed because he was

a name and the thing is he's trying to figure

out what is Online persona is and it's just he's

not gonna have one. He's gonna be partnered with

mojo Raleigh They're gonna waste five million

dollars and have him basically come out to whenever

they go to a big event like Saudi Arabia and

all these different places and have him win and

then he'll job out on regular TV and They're

gonna be yeah, they're basically wasted money

on him because he doesn't have to build he doesn't

have the talking skills he Mojo is better than

him and Mojo is just his friend Yeah, exactly.

All right. The Universal Championship match,

Braun Strowman versus Goldberg. You mean Santa

Claus? Wasn't he in Santa's sleigh or something

years ago? Something like that. Yeah, I think

so. A white bearded white chest hair, which means

that when Goldberg had been coming out the last

couple of years, he had been dying his chest

hair. But a white haired Santa Claus chewing

bubble gum. Yeah, this is how little Goldberg

gave a shit walking those narrow hallways. He

just chooses gum just doesn't care. He doesn't

do the breathing of the smoke. He's just like,

Yep, I'm here. Let's get it over with the upper

cuts or anything. He just he was like, Hey, I'm

in my 50s. I don't want to catch a virus. How

much Vince, are you giving me a hundred grand

to come out here for this? Okay. I'll come, but

I'm, I don't have to care. I have, I have contractually

obligated to do seven spears. Anything more than

that. You have to pay me. So if he comes back,

I don't want to see him come back. Not at summer

slam. I wanted to come back at the Royal rumble

as Santa Claus, like, like have him grow like

a white beard, make it really long. And he just

comes back as, as, um, Yeah. Yeah. Old Berg.

Wow. That's funny. Old Berg. That's pretty basically

what he was. He's still in great physical shape.

Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't fuck with them, but

still. Braun Strowman. He's been making stupid

remarks in public lately. Oh, boy. Are going

to bite him in the ass later on. What does he

said? He was telling people that was telling

other wrestlers that the that they shouldn't

complain about the coronavirus stuff, that you

should just save your money if you're a wrestler.

And it's like, you realize that you were given

a multimillion dollar contract when you were

a useless wrestler, and then they spent another

million dollars taking you to training over the

course of a year to make you the next big guy.

When the average wrestler out there is making

12 grand a year, and then they have to supplement

that, you doing something else. And then he's

like, Oh, uh, you shouldn't be canceling your,

your shows or you shouldn't be canceling your

appointments because of coronavirus. You should

make your commitments. And it's like, Hey motherfucker,

it's a lot easier for you to do when you're doing

it in a closed building, uh, with the company

in the world. Cause it was, he was mad at people

for starting go fund me for their, for wrestlers.

Oh, that's incredibly tone deaf. That's yeah.

so he called he was calling them he was basically

calling them beggars and and lesser lands for

that's for go fund me that's bullshit so brawn

is the new universal champion uh and then on

this is the final front of brunner's the universal

champion until they can get crowds back again

exactly and then to end night one part one of

wrestlemania the movie 2020 this is where i this

is where all the money went and I think all three

are like you guys might be on one side of this

I'm probably gonna be on the other this is actually

one of my more enjoyable moments of the night

absolutely because it's enjoyable for the wrong

reasons yeah it kills any credibility they had

left well actually no that's the day two does

that this kills a lot of credibility it makes

me question something this is a billion dollar

company Why does it not look any better than

the broken Matt Hardy stuff? They filmed on iPhones.

You know, I'm glad you brought that up. So I

found out now someone's going to have to source

this from me, but a guy I trust to be fairly

reliable said the same guy who did the broken

Matt Hardy stuff for TNA also shot this. Yeah.

Yeah. So it looks the exact same. So I said,

where'd the money go? That's what I'm wondering,

too, because I said to Alex in the chat, like,

you're telling me WWE that has all this money

couldn't hire anybody better than what they got

in their back pocket. I mean, yes, I realize

flying somebody up from Hollywood will be expensive,

if not outright prohibited. Yet they have really

good packages they film when they film them at

their headquarters. So yeah, like like this is

here's the thing. The broken hearty stuff from

what? Like four or five years ago, that was Filmed

with I believe it was one camera guy Jeremy Borash

did some of the camera work himself They filmed

it edited themselves They edited themselves like

at like on their own computers, you know I mean

they didn't have an editing studio or suite to

work with they did all that on a shoestring budget

for like a couple hundred bucks and Why does

that from five years ago? Look the same except

the only difference here was they paid Metallica

money and they paid to have a laser light show

and pyrotechnics yes no that was black magic

yeah oh right i forgot he's got zombie powers

so the reason why i enjoyed this okay there's

that but i know i'm in the minority here but

you have absolutely loved it i just think well

no no no Right. But what I'm going to say is

I know I'm in the minority here on the, on the

podcast and probably in the world. I grew up

obviously in the eighties. I'm the oldest of

the three of us because I beat Mike by eight

months. Um, but it's one of those things where

I grew up in the eighties. My dad used to take

me to, I remember seeing barely remember seeing

as a kid, six, seven years old. hogan and piper

and junkyard dog and all all those guys i watched

mean gene every time he was on whatever they

were running whatever i dropped off from i'd

say 90 to about 97 98 99 so right around 98 99

right when i was graduating high school i picked

it back up And where I found the Undertaker was

the American badass. I get it. Nobody likes it.

Fine. Whatever. That's whatever. And everyone's

like, oh look, the American badass is back against

AJ Styles. I don't think it's necessarily the

American badass. It's kind of like that. Yes,

he does have the bike. Yes, he does have the

bandana and whatever else, but. he didn't he

was wearing basically all black it wasn't like

he he was decked out in american flags or anything

like that well there's a story to be told here

and i think they're smart enough to uh to go

forward with it did you notice something interesting

he wasn't able to control the druids so it's

almost like i did it's almost like he relinquished

some of his other worldly powers yeah his dead

madness yeah like he's he's relinquished some

of the powers he still retains some So he, he's

really like, like Prince of darkness hybrid taker.

Yeah. Bit of both. And, and I liked it. I enjoyed

it. And I got to say AJ, as much as I like AJ

when he's not against people that I like more,

like John Cena or somebody like that. I got to

say this storyline of him going after Michelle

McCool and all that and everything else. I think

AJ played this really well. i think aj did all

his promos for this all all the stuff i saw leading

up to this so so good and i just dug this because

it was finally something different i have been

clamoring ever since wrestlemania 24 i have been

wanting them to do an outdoor wrestlemania again

they have not since wrestlemania 24 i think it

was in florida somewhere i could be wrong i don't

know uh I remember that was outside and I think

maybe WrestleMania 31 was outside but it was

like barely outside that's the one that was I

think it was the 31 or 32 that was out in Los

Angeles and it didn't get dark until like the

second last match yep yep that's yeah um but

I like this I thought this was for what it what

it was I thought it was Fairly interesting AJ

Surprisingly like since going to Japan and all

that has become really good on the mic because

he he was always a really good athlete It's just

an impact. He wasn't really good on the mic and

he's really coming to his own And I mean like

it's it's it's that match that people thought

like okay. Well Who can give a good match to

him? Well AJ can give a good match, but who can

also you know stand up on the mic with him and

This is the most takers talked in probably five

years since I've been watching again Yeah, since

he was probably the most he's talked since like

the Shawn Michaels matches. Yep, pretty much

Yeah, and he looks at her health his knees like

he's not limping anymore. He's moving around

quite well I loved how he looked so good how

he was selling it when he's and AJ's like you

old man. He's like And then AJ puts him in there

and then he teleports behind AJ and he's like,

how are you standing? I buried you. Yeah, I love

that. I love that about this man. How are you

standing? You're dead. You're supposed to be

in the... It was such a Robocop moment. I couldn't

help but laugh. And this is Sparta kick too?

Oh my God, when he Sparta kicks AJ into the grave,

I almost shit myself. I was laughing so hard.

of like jesus yeah overall they paid a lot of

money to metallica for this too you can tell

uh so you know you mentioned that this is the

most he's talked it was either right before this

it was some point up to this point that i saw

in the video that i had an advertisement for

a, I believe it's a 10 week mini series or something

like that. Like behind like the undertaker, the

last ride on WWE network that this is why I love

WWE network. It isn't for the pay per views.

It's for these like 24 and 365 and you know,

table for three. It's for these behind the scenes

things that undertaker special, whenever it does

get to the network. We're so covering that whether

you're here or not Mike we got cuz First time

ever Behind the scenes like I watched the preview

of this there's a 13 minute like first look kind

of thing on there They call him out by name.

Obviously they talk about his wife They you know,

he's like, you know what happened to me what

this what that whatever? It's basically chronicling

his his career from like 2017 to this year Like

what the hell happened for the last ride kind

of thing. I know it looks really interesting.

I think he had experimental knee surgery that

also included stem cells, which are technically

a lot legal in most of the States. So I think

he had to go to like Guam or someplace to get

it done, which is actually what Edge did too.

He had to go outside of the States to get stem

cell stuff done. And now he's magically able

to wrestle again. Wow. Interesting. So that was

night one. Before we get to night two overall,

how, if this was just a regular, let's say WWE

put WrestleMania back at a regular two or three

or four hour pay -per -view, how would you guys

rate this zero to five as a regular WrestleMania?

This was a shitty episode of Raw. This was basically

impact from six years ago. Oh. This was like

Slammiversary. Now there are elements that are

cool. It's just a terrible WrestleMania so far.

If you took every good element from both days

and made one two hour show, it'd be about a six

or a seven. Yeah. Cause the ladders match was

okay. Becky versus Shana was all right. Kevin

Owens and Seth Rollins to had some cool moments

in it. But as a package night one was kind of

a wet. And the Goldberg thing was like wet. And

then yeah, the Goldberg thing was what that was

a waste. Like there was no point. They could

have done that at another day. It didn't have

to be done there. Uh, I would say if you included,

um, the ladder match, Shana match, and then.

the maybe the little bit of hijinks with with

our truth and then put in the boneyard match

and you just kept those and then mixed it with

a couple from the next one you'd have a solid

two two and a half hours yeah that's true all

right I accepted a challenge because I believe

in what I said WWE needs to invest in its future.

In my opinion, Bray Wyatt is not that future.

It's good to see you again, John. You don't really

think we think that you care about the future,

do we? John Cena cares about John Cena, right?

Six years ago, at WrestleMania, you took something

from me. In his hands, he's got the whole world

in his hands. One day I stopped fighting the

Voices. You had your chance. You failed against

John Cena. And I started listening to him. And

I realize now, if it wasn't for John Cena, the

Firefly Funhouse, it wouldn't even exist. You

broke me, John, but the Fiend. He put me back

together. In fact, he wants you to step into

our world of madness and mayhem. A world where

anything goes and the fun never ends. So he is

officially challenging you to a firefly funhouse

match at WrestleMania. This WrestleMania match

is gonna accomplish what should have happened

six years ago. Ending the existence of the most

overhyped, overvalued, overprivileged WWE Superstar.

He is waiting at WrestleMania. The Fiend has

dominated the WWE landscape with uncertainty,

fear, and panic. It's going to be a slaughter.

I will not panic. I sure as hell am not afraid.

Night. to kickoff match Liv Morgan versus Natalia.

Liv Morgan wins. She's very pretty. That's all

I got to say. All right. Stephanie welcomes everybody

tonight too. And we start off with the NXT women's

championship match with Charlotte Flair defeating

Rhea Ripley. Charlotte Flair has been reduced

to NXT. Did she get injured and has to? What's

going on there? Okay. Evidently, according to

the recap package, she's like, you're cocky and

I want the gold back because I've done everything

else. I might as well take this from you because

I'm an evil flair. Oh, and here's the thing.

WWE is trying to market her as a baby face. Oh,

yeah. She's better as a heel. Yeah. So sorry.

It was boring and terrible. And it's going to

be defended on Raw and on NXT. Let's just fast

forward. It was not a good match. No, Alistair

Black versus Bobby Lashley. It was supposed to

be Rusev versus, but then Rusev refused to work.

I think it was something. No, it has partially

to do. He's got heat with the office for wanting

out of his contract about a few months back.

And that's why they're still having his real

life wife married to Bobby Lashley. This match

made no sense. Nobody gave a shit. Bobby Lashley

has no charisma. Lana should keep her mouth shut

at all times because she's gotten worse on the

mic as time goes on. Which is weird because when

she was Rusev's valet, I thought she was freaking

fantastic. Yeah, because she said like three

or four words in front of a crowd and that was

it. Stop talking. You're not good at that. And

she had a character. Have I I talked about this

I think with you privately What the fuck is going

on with her and like she's tanning herself till

she's like a different skin color completely

To the point where it's like she's gonna damage

her skin like it looks like and you know This

is mandated from the upper office like it to

me like she looks like and this is not like this

has nothing to do with like racism or anything

she looks like she's gonna bend her arm and have

her skin crack open like it's like a layer of

like it's not even bronzing she's actually she

looks more like sand and sand color and like

orange colored than uh than like carmella does

which i've always had a problem with so whatever

they're doing to her it's just it can't be good

for her skin i don't know like it's just it's

a weird image that they want to have her portray

on tv she looks like an oscar statue it just

it doesn't look right i i don't like it because

I really like her. Like I follow her on Instagram.

Um, I even accidentally stalked her and Rusev

in Toronto a couple of years ago, cause we kept

following them and we didn't mean to. Um, but,

um, yeah, this match was boring to the point

where I looked down at my phone. And by the time

I looked back up, it was over. Go from the company.

He is terrible. He had a cool intro. He used

to be alright, didn't he? He'd come out of a

coffin and that's how he'd enter the ring. It's

like cool, but he is horrific in the ring. Terrible

on the market. Didn't he used to be good? No,

he was packaged. Really? He was packaged to look

good. He has the laziest kicks I've ever seen.

He's got the wrong body type and I just can't

stand somebody who has terrible tattoo ideas.

Like, I'm sorry, there's no rhyme or reason to

the pattern of his tattoos. It's just like, let's

just get, let's get a dog's anus tattooed on

my knuckle. And then we're going to get, we're

going to get a balloon put on my elbow and we'll

get some, um, some shiny stars put on my shoulder.

Like he's one of those guys where it's like,

there's no pattern. There's no, why you look,

he looks like he looks like a homeless bum. Geez.

Up next, Otis defeating Dolph Ziggler. This was

surprisingly amusing. A storyline of the entire

mania. In fact, it's the only storyline that's

been longer than three weeks. I'd say the John

Cena, Bray White thing's been there forever.

They only drummed up interest for it two weeks

earlier. True. So like that that's a callback.

That's okay. I'll give it that but this was this

has been going on for two years. Oh Wow, yeah,

like it started at NXT and then they brought

it over to the main roster and they kept going

with it And for once the big guy gets the girl

Wow Once Yeah, I'm still like I'm still not a

fan of Dolph I just, yeah, I've always liked

him because he is a very hard worker and he's

got a big sense of humor about it. Waste of talent

though. That's a huge waste of talent. You got,

you got Sean Michaels there and you're not using

it was basically what it's like with him. Uh,

I will say this, uh, Otis has the best shirt

in WWE. Yeah, he does. Ham and slam. Yep. Up

next was the last man standing match between

two old dudes edge and Randy Orton Good match.

This is the match I fell asleep at twice and

actually snoring and woke myself up if I was

supposed to feel bad for this one goes like I

just didn't care and that's the thing cuz edge

is From the next town over from me like a girl

that I'm friends with remembers watching edge

wrestle in the hallways of her high school I

know people I know people that like babysat them

so Like it's a case of really bad timing to come

back to the company. Yeah. Yeah, it is. I mean,

I liked seeing them work. I think it's still

great. I mean, it's too old. But what was Randy's

story? Randy's story is I love you more than

your family. So I must kill you. Yeah. God let's

reunite rated RKO and then stupidness. At least

they both know how to cut a promo. Yeah, exactly,

but I'm telling you last man standing is not

a match you need to have with no people Yeah,

you know makes no sense. Yeah I was laughing

out loud at how stupid it got to like he sits

Randy in a chair and then does like swing one

two three So he can swing towards him and land

with his crotch in his face to knock him to the

ground Also Randy Orton I wouldn't put it past

him to have made a big boo -boo. And he tries

to hang him with those weird, you know, we add

those pieces of like strength things, yeah. Kind

of evokes a little Benoit thing, doesn't it?

Considering that the Benoit episode aired right

before this. Randy Ordon's also gotten in trouble

a few times for talking about Benoit publicly

when he's not supposed to. So why did he choose

to strangle him with... the barbells and all

that stuff. That's not good. Not a good image,

but I feel like he's like, what's this going

to do, fire me? At this point, he needs anybody

that he can get. Overall, horrible match. Way

too long, terrible refs. You could hear them

calling spots. Edge is great, needs to be in

front of a crowd again. Yeah, he does. Gronk

versus Mojo for 24 -7. Champion, Gronk wins.

So there's that. With the worst moves I've ever

seen. I'd rather have Regis Philbin win. I hear

a certain presence on his way out so he can always

win it. Raw Tag Team Championship match the Street

Profits versus Angel Garza and Austin Theory.

I know these names, but they mean nothing to

me. Who are these people? You do not know Austin

Theory because he didn't show up on TV until

like a week or two ago? I've heard his name before.

You're thinking of Austin Aries, who's good,

but who is a good guy, but an asshole. So they

fired him and every company fired him. Okay.

He's the guy that just come to the ring eating

a banana. Wait, I think you showed me this before.

Yes, he did. Anywhere like a kindergarten kids

cape Yeah, I remember this it was so stupid.

You're like Mike You're never gonna believe this

and I didn't and you did and you proved me wrong

Guys I yeah this I didn't even I didn't even

watch this I actually left the room. Yeah, I

Was forwarded through it. I tried man, and it

was like what the fuck cuz I didn't know who

any of these people were I'm pretty sure the

Street Profits one Um, some of their moves look

really pretty. I'll say that, but they don't

land any impact with me, but as, but as Alex

has said, I have no connection to these people.

So. Yep. All right. Three matches left on this

one. Smackdown women's championship, fatal five

-way elimination match Bailey versus Sasha Lacey,

Naomi and Tamina. What the hell is Tamina doing

in WWE? I'm pretty sure it's whoever was living

around the area. They just got. I swear there's

blackmail she's got on Vince because there's

always that rumor that or that went around. Well

actually sort of truth. Vince walked in with

a briefcase full of money to the police station

when Snuka was arrested for murder. Walked out

with Snuka and without the briefcase. And that

is in the police deposition. It's in what happened.

So there's some shit she's got on him or he's

loyal to her because of her father. She's terrible.

I've never seen somebody more cross -eyed in

a sport ever. Like she's looking one way and

then she can look at the other person across

the ring in the other direction. Like it's like

she has no physique. She has no strength. They're

like, she's so strong. She's like lifting like

two 60 pound girls. And then she's terrible.

She gets winded, like walking to the ring. I

remember when she used to be someone's bodyguard.

I think it was who, who was it? Was it Peyton?

It was, no, it was Naomi. Not Naomi. Not Naomi.

It's, uh, God, the Nia Jax, Nia Jax. Yeah, she

used to be a goon and I saw her pull off one

or two things. I thought were kind of neat. But

as at the whole, I kind of agree with Alex. Like

you don't have a personality. You don't have

a move set. She looks like nothing to define

you as anything special. She looks like Humpty

Dumpty with a big wig on. Like she has no strength

or power. No, she has no move set. She has no.

Nobody ever believes she'll win anything ever.

So she's in a fatal five way. Here's an idea.

You take Tamina, and you take Shayna Baszler.

You put them together, and hopefully Shayna makes

Tamina a little bit better physically, and they

each help each other to get through their...

I thought you were saying you mix them together.

If you mix them together, you end up with Awesome

Kong? Like as far as like a good, a good wrestler

with, with that physique, like, you know what

I mean? Like, but yeah, like she's never, she's

literally there for some sort of black male reason.

There's no other way you could ever keep that

job. If, if, if there was anybody else or if

there was a guy like that, it would have been

gone immediately. Also, I just realized something.

There are some people that didn't show up in

mania at all, even though there was like eight

hours of mania. There was there was no No job

squad or whatever. They're calling themselves

the beats B team or B team. Yeah. Yeah, there

was there was no Heath Slater there was no Curtis

Axel and there was no Bo Dallas at all I think

yeah, but yeah, this was this was the this was

the worst match of the entire show Yeah Yeah,

there wasn't. Although one thing that really

stuck out to me, and this was before the match,

but tied to it, is the lady did an interview

with Bailey and Sasha. Bailey sounds atrocious

as a heel. What the hell happened to her? I told

you she turned into a gangbang sex genie. That's

all she does. Like she looks like she looks like

something like a porn parody. Uh, like she's

aging terrible. It's a terrible haircut. She

has no charisma. She she's almost taught. She

talks like she's had a stroke. And her ring gear

is terrible. Her in -ring work's gotten bad.

Like what is she even doing at the company? I

don't know. It's crazy. Cause they, you know,

her and Sasha used to be really, really cool.

Whether they were doing whatever storyline they

were doing, best friends, whatever the hell you

want to call it. It's like. But now and I've

known for years now since we've been doing the

show since she debuted Bailey just can't pull

off being a heel or a bad guy. She can do the

good guy thing. She can do the hometown I'm from

San Jose or whatever it is and I love this I've

loved this and so she can do that Well, but she

can't do bad. Well at all. She never has energy

of charisma She's always like flat. You know,

I mean like she doesn't she never projects a

character It's always just like, Hey, I'm here

to win and I'm here with my friends and nobody's

going to beat me. You can't beat me. Nobody can

beat me. See nobody. Nobody can beat me. You

can't beat me. It's like, you can't see me. We

don't want to see anymore. So I'm going to say

let's, let's, before we get into the, the firefly

finance, let's actually talk about the last match

because it's only like two minutes long. Yeah.

So Drew Mack and the WWE championship match,

Drew McIntyre versus Brock Lesnar. Okay. I want

to talk about this first because I knew Drew

McIntyre. He'd been coming up. He got kicked

at a three man band. Then he came back after

he spent some time away and he got Jack pretty

frigging hardcore. He went to England, worked

there and then went to impact. And in 2016, Uh,

I believe he won at their version of WrestleMania.

Slammiversary became their champion and he was

jacked there. Uh, he basically, he's one of the

few guys that used impact to become a better

worker. Yeah. So I was pretty impressed to see

him get something at WrestleMania. That's pretty

cool. Plus he won the rumble. Cool. All right.

I'm pretty excited. He's facing Brock Lesnar.

a little less excited now because Brock only

works about an hour per year. So, okay, fine.

Maybe I'll get something good. Occasionally Brock

can put on a good match. Him and John Cena almost

never disappoint me. So, maybe I'll get something

neat out of this because why not? What did I

get? Looked down at my phone for about two minutes

while I was doing something else because I figure

this should last longer than that. Claymore!

Claymore! Claymore! Claymore! Drew McIntyre's

the new what -the -fuck -ever champion! Wait,

what? The actual WWF champion, the old school

champion. Yeah, this was, if you timed it, I

think it's the same length as the Goldberg fight

and was basically the same fight. Wow. Yeah.

It was really weird. So... Heyman was great,

though. Yeah, Heyman's always great. Do it all

night long! Yep, keep on him. Keep on him. Just

do it again. Yep. Do it again Just do it again

and just like just locking him like that was

great. Yeah. Yeah, that was amazing Here's the

thing I Get Brock is who Brock is and he's put

in what he's put in and Whatever, but again going

back really quickly to undertaker Brock Lesnar,

even though he beat the streak he is no undertaker

part of that thing uh part of that upcoming special

that they're gonna run in the preview takers

talking about how he basically works once a year

and he basically has to train all regardless

of his age i mean yes he is up there he's 50

something whatever but you know the fact that

i mean brock is maybe 10 years younger And Brock

only really does what Brock wants to do and that's

fine. But I'm kind of glad this WWE Championship

match was. Basically a one and done. I'm kind

of glad like yeah, I don't I don't I don't mind

seeing Brock do things I don't mind seeing Brock

get the belt every now and then but I hate it

when Brock goes on a tear and He wants to stay

the champion. I love that drew on this I don't

think he cares if he's champion or not. It's

Vince needs him for the draw He hasn't had to

work hard and do dynamic matches since his stuff

with Kurt Angle like 17 years ago. Yeah. He,

and he did when he initially came back, he worked

a little better. And then it was suplex city

nonstop, which was great for, it was great when

he was destroying John Cena because John Cena

had had 10 years of everybody going, Oh, great.

Cena wins every match. So it was, it was, but

it wasn't, it was refreshing. It wasn't so much

that we were like, Oh, ha ha. He's beating scene

of that same way. Every time it was ha ha. Look

at the audience. Look at the fools that, that,

that wants you to win. That's why we were all

cheering them on. And then we're like, Oh no,

this is all he's ever going to do for the next

six years. It's crazy. So speaking of our buddy,

John Cena. This is the best and worst thing the

company has ever done. The best thing for, for

internet trolls ever. And, but the worst thing

for the business of wrestling ever. Let me tell

you watching this was a frigging. trip. Okay.

So, um, and again, you were prefacing this, but

this is the kind that did edibles before watching,

right? Yes. So, um, this was a fricking trick.

John Cena's arguing with a puppet at one point.

He's hiding behind the TV. There's this evil

looking buddy. He's like, Hey John Cena, I saw

Bray. He went behind that door. Be careful or

we're going to get you. Go on. You can trust

me. And John Cena's looking. utterly, legitimately

confused, which means he's an amazing actor.

What's weird about John Cena is he looks like

he's dropped about 30 pounds while maintaining

zero body fat. And with hair, he's getting bald,

though. He hasn't got a bald spot on the top

of his head. But with that hair and everything,

he's looking so much like Ernest P. Worrall.

It's not even funny anymore. If he were to drop

the muscles, he could just play Jim Varney in

an autobiography. So my favorite part of this

and I am, I've never made any, any notions about

my disdain for the character that Wyatt does.

My favorite part of this is when the Doctor of

Thuganomics came out. That was so fucking hilarious.

But for anybody that wants to go, like it was

a trip through the history of Cena, but a little

bit of WWE. The only thing that was missing.

was they never traveled to his, uh, OVW debut

with, with the company where he was the prototype.

Yeah. Um, the closest they got was when they

went and did his, when, when he did his version.

No, it was a little before that when they did

the, uh, Saturday night main event, his eighties

character was a little bit closer to what his

original indie look was. Yeah. But like he goes

in and it timed time travels and. Each he basically

follows each era of his character trying to Fight

his demons or something. I guess or to unseat

him somehow Yeah, and like it gets goofier. There's

Looney Tunes sound effects when he misses And

there's teleporting puppets yes like God like

I wouldn't the Saturday's main event one was

great where he's Johnny large meat He's just

pumping he's just pumping dumbbells we like yeah,

look at me I'm large meat. I heard somebody call

it the bodybuilder dance And like the dolls are

like want to have sex with them from they're

giving them the sex eyes And like, you know,

ridiculousness pumping. And then he's got linguine

arms so he can't attack. It's so weird. I mean,

watching this, honestly, Bray White and John

Cena must have said, what's the goofiest thing

we could do and get away with? And that's brilliant.

And they're even making fun of, like, Vince McMahon,

like even had the Vince puppet go, that's good

shit. And like, okay, well, they're allowed to

swear now, apparently. It's basically copying.

This was better produced than the Boneyard match,

but this kills any slight semblance of credibility

the company ever had left. As far as being a

pro wrestling company, and they've gone full

meme. This was something like if they were going

to make a Edge and Christian show the Total Lyrics

of Awesomeness movie, this is what I would have

expected to happen in that. Yeah, exactly. Not

as the co -main event of WrestleMania. It was

so strange, though. I mean, the puppet swearing

and the... Yeah. And then he transports into

his ruthless aggression era. And then he transports

into, like he said, Dr. Thuganomics, where he's

talking about everybody getting hard on. Husky

Harris. We call Husky Harris. What was it? Everybody

just went from six to midnight. So, OK, well,

there's an erection joke. Then then right after

that, his rap involved putting was putting a

puppet on his dick and having you suck it or

something. I was like, OK, and then put rubbing

these nuts on your face. I'm like, what is they

are really? Yeah, they're really trying to prefer.

This is a PG company, right? Not anymore, apparently.

I guess John Cena can do whatever the hell he

wants. He has Hollywood now. He only shows up

because he's bored. He shows up because Vince

says, I need you. That's really why he showed

up. He's going to be like Taker. He'll come back

and do these every so often. But I did like the

nitro. The NWO and they, but they got the NWO

effect wrong. They clearly use like whatever

default effect was in, uh, in like after effects

and they didn't use the original filter. Um,

and then they, they twist and turn and you know,

the, the fiend finally wins. But the best part

of this is at the end when it cuts to Titus who's

now in charge of, of announcing and Titus is

like, I have no idea what we just saw. I hope

that was a genuine reaction. I'm pretty sure

it was. So, I mean, I think it was great. I think

it was great from an entertainment perspective.

I think it's terrible from wrestling because

it wasn't really. But here's the thing. As with

the Taker one, I think this is how Taker should

do his matches every single time he shows up.

I don't think he needs to have a live show other

than to hype people in to get the crowd in there.

And then. You know, maybe show up whenever he

wants to do something over in Saudi Arabia because

they play them a million dollars. Because here's,

here's the thing. This, the way the boneyard

match was, that's how you can do a taker versus

sting. Yeah, they could, they're not going to

have to hurt each other. They can take as many

takes to take a break because they have to get,

catch their breath or whatever. You could, you

could do a boneyard match and do it against the

crow. Crow's day Similarly, this is how you can

do you know for some of the older rest was like

I was really hoping They were gonna put Hulk

Hogan or something in here because Hulk Hogan

lives in Florida When they would do the Saturday

Night Man event, I thought it would have been

great to have Hogan there You know dressed like

he used to dress introducing his tag partner

as being Cena Even if it was just for that little

scene and then have and then have him Blink and

look and look to his left and then Hogan turns

into or like flashes and turns into Bray Wyatt,

right? Yeah, that would have been cool Like we've

said certain parts of this were enjoyable other

parts were cringe -worthy It's a very different

WrestleMania. I mean we started When we started

may and Mike's we started with WrestleMania 31

and we're now up to 36 And WrestleMania 36 is,

like Alex said, you cut certain things together,

you cut certain things out, you have a good show.

But overall, I'm glad they did the two night

thing. I really am, because - Here's the question.

Why was the show that was the only show ever

not in front of an audience, why is it the longest

WrestleMania ever? It's eight hours plus, including

the pre -shows. Yeah, this was a long watch,

man. I couldn't have done this live, no way.

I was glad I had to take breaks. In our group

chats, why I was having a wall of text come up.

And if you look, the part where the John Cena

match starts is when I had the wall of, oh my

God, LOL, LOL, LOL, LOL. This is so stupid. And

I was hoping we'd have more reactions from the

people, but I feel like even the rest of our

friends aren't even going to bother to watch

it. I think this is the kind of thing where you're

going to be able to pick out a match or two and

they're going to put WWE is going to put it on

YouTube, individual matches, three to one. The

ladder match would be on there for sure. Probably.

Yeah. Although one thing I, we never did talk

about this and this is just two things I noticed

from a production standpoint. The camera work

felt very different. Uh, it felt like they were

using whomever the NXT people. Yeah. Well, it

wasn't. It wasn't at Full Sail where they film

NXT, but I felt like it was using, it felt like

it was using university students. It didn't feel

like they were using it. The other thing that

was off is the lighting was poor. For somebody

who has millions of dollars in lighting, I felt

like they were limited because they could only

have one lighting guy. Like they didn't have

enough time to set these things up properly before

they were shut down. The sound was off like for

something that was edited clearly there were

some scenes in the the final match with Lesnar

where they cut weird angles Weird stuff like

he knocks the guy down and then it cuts to the

right -hand side They were breaking the line

of continuity so many times which is a big no

-no for anybody knows filming You're not supposed

to turn the camera beyond 90 degree angles There

are certain things that they did that were weird

shots that just felt like very amateur hour,

stuff that even AEW wouldn't do. And I don't

know, like kudos to whomever was able to cut

together. the two nights, whoever Vince had working

on that, because they did a hell of a job considering

the situation. Also, could you imagine how much

money they had to spend to get Johnny Depp to

do - Yeah, I was gonna bring that up. I was like,

why is Captain Jack here? And almost in character,

but not just - It was in character. He says his

name in it. No, he says - Something along the

lines of, and as a certain rogue like Jack Sparrow,

it was just enough that he couldn't get nailed.

I have a feeling that originally he was planned

to be there live. I think so too. Also, what

the hell is with the Pirates of the Caribbean

theme? Even if they had filmed there, it was

not going to be on a boat. So maybe there was

going to be something with The Rock or something

with Johnny Depp. What does Pirates of the Caribbean

have to do with Florida? How about this the music

for the theme was the weekend the lamest sounding

song for WrestleMania what no No flow right at

this time. No, no what they couldn't get pitbull

to Belch out some garbage. I just keep yelling

Miami over and over again Or was this in Tampa

or something, right? So this was yeah. Oh, so

you can't just yell, you know Miami over and

over and over and over again His entire songs

are just screaming Miami and then a bunch of

Spanish gibberish. You know, as much as everybody

else but me and Jonathan Todarian give them grief,

they really could have used a Nickelback song.

They could have used Burn It To The Ground. It

would have been fine because it would have fit

in with the times. Anyway, not wrong there Anyway

going forward on man mics. Like I said, we may

cover the occasional WWE pay -per -view, but

I've been kind of dipping my viewership into

a W I've watched the last two episodes last two

or three episodes of a W dynamite We will, I

don't know how, we will cover the AEW TNT championship

tournament. I'm not sure how we're going to do

that yet, but that'll be kind of the next big

thing. Which, to be honest, seems more exciting

than what Vania was. Of course. Well, I mean,

you know, that's, that's kind of AEW's thing.

They want to, you know, kill the king. Speaking

of, there was no Triple H at this event at all.

No, there wasn't and I'm actually very happy

about that. I loved And nobody's no no Vince

at all either So I guess Vince wasn't there because

they would make the news that a 70 some odd year

old man was breaking curfew to be on TV And with

with Triple H. It was like why he had no this

is the first mania. He's not had a match at Since

he signed with the company Yeah, you know I'm

not even like He's the kind of guy that could

have put on a really cool Firefly Funhouse type

match. They could have done something like that,

but he's nowhere to be found at all. That was

weird. Yeah. I don't know. The only other thing

I want to bring up is the one guy that did show

up. JBL on announcing. Wow. I haven't heard that

guy in forever. Yeah, because he's been problematic.

Well, yeah, I know he's there because remember

they they had to cancel the the Hall of Fame

Stuff so they were trying to get like can we

get a Hall of Famer in here to talk? They can't

have the king because it is not a good idea for

a guy his age He's like 70 or whatever to be

traveling The best line in the entire thing from

all the first of all the commentators 99 % of

them terrible fire fire Byron Saxton and the

other dude, Tom Phillips, they're horrendous.

Yeah, they are. And then even during like the

edge match, they were like whispering. It's like,

no, be exciting. But JBL, he did say one thing

that made me laugh. It was when. When what's

his name? When Otis won and he picked up the

girl and they go, she goes to kiss him and he

goes, oh, somebody called PETA. He goes, that's

animal cruelty. And I was like, okay, that was

good. Okay. If you're going to do a fat joke,

do that one. That's funny. So yes. Um, I don't

know when the AW stuff is going to come folks.

The undertaker last ride documentary thing I

mentioned, um, that'll happen when it. airs on

WWE Network. To my knowledge, WWE Network is

still free for everybody except for WrestleMania.

I think the first episode of The Undertaker thing

aired right after Mania. Yeah, it was like a

first look. It was like a 13 minute first look

thing and it said it's coming soon. It did not

say when. Will Alex and myself and Mike if he

so chooses and whomever else in our mayhem Mike's

group on Facebook We will figure out how we're

gonna do the AEW thing with the TNT Championship

Which is essentially just the TV title I guess

I don't know. It's like their TV slash Intercontinental

title. Yeah, well at least it's a at least it's

a TV title versus an Intercontinental title because

Like you, I think it was you that said it in

the group, Alex. I never understood why an American

has the intercontinental title. Well, it was

like, I think it was supposed to be, they made

that title to go against the U S championship

because everybody else has the U S champion.

And WWE, when they were trying to expand in the

early eighties, they're like, no, no, no, we

are better than that. We have an intercontinental.

It's everybody from North and South America.

And then they said, like, they made up that bullshit

about Pat Patterson winning it at some tournament

in South America, like Brazil. And that was the

idea is, oh, no, this title is more important

than the NWA USA champion. Good Lord. Yeah, that's

literally how petty it was. Any parting thoughts,

Mr. Dodd? Are you over there punching yourself?

My God, this was a fucking atrocious watch. I'm

not sad that I left WWE. I'm sad I left certain

performers, but on a whole man, Jesus, I don't

know whether I could do another WrestleMania.

This is the quality that they're pumping out.

I imagine next year, as long as it's not another

pandemic thing going on, it'll be worth watching

to see how they, you know, counter program this

one, but yeah. You know, other than that, Mike,

or Mike's, I guess, you can always just wait

and hope that some of them get released from

their contracts and go work for the NWA or for

AEW. Because at this point, what I found hilarious

was this is this Mesomania, the with Drew McIntyre

headlining. He's the first person to be. He will,

he's the smallest draw for a champion ever because

there's nobody there. Uh, but on top of that,

he headlined slam aversary for impact where he

won his title there in 2016. And that was in

front of 1200 people. So he's the only person

that can say that as champion, he drew more people

to impact then WWE like it's unprecedented. Like,

I don't even know why they bothered. Like if

they were going to do instead of WrestleMania,

they should have done. Like six vignettes and

done like and done a two -hour special with each

match being like Boneyard and Firefly Funhouse

and done a different thing all together say WrestleMania

has taken a break but here we'll get out here

is is it's WWE after hours blah blah blah made

up some sort of bullshit and Honestly, what they

could even do to expand upon that is they could

film a bunch of these over the course of the

year And if they need quick emergency programming,

they've got it. Cause you could film these in

a weekend and cut them over the course of like

a week or two. Yeah. AW recorded nine weeks of

programming last before they were shut down.

So they're stacked for the next nine weeks. Uh,

WWE has nothing. They were trying to record it,

but if they could, they were shut down right

after. So stuff that airs this week is the last

bit they have prerecorded. Good Lord. You know,

it's funny. I just had a. Really, really bad

thought. If they had said, you know, I understand

like Stephanie was like, you know, when she did

her introduction, she was like, I want everybody

to, you know, we want everybody to have some

sort of entertainment. And I agree, we need entertainment

right now. I just don't think a company that

relies on a live audience, especially at their

crown. quite literally quote unquote crown jewel

pay -per -view every year. I just don't think

it should have been done the way. And I agree

with you, Alex. It should have been done the

way you're saying. And you know what they could

have called it? WWE turn off the dark. Yeah.

The crib and something like that. Yeah. Like

it, but instead we, we cut garbage. Like it's

just amazing to me what they ended up, uh, you

know, doing and trying to do. I seriously hope

to God that none of our listeners are still paying

40, 50, $60 for these pay -per -views. Get the

WWE network once or twice and yeah. And if you're

out in like a rural area where your internet

speed isn't fast enough to get the network or

stream it, just don't watch. There's literally

no point. Like there's really no point in watching

if it's that bad. Here's the thing. Well, I was

going to say you could watch like the WWE movies

instead, but to be honest, this was still better

than anything that like the Miz did for the Marine

three, four, five, or six. At Bank of Ireland,

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folks with that. I think we're gonna get the

heck out of here. You can find me on social media

as well as geek cast radio network I am at TF2

and Mike on touring and find us at geek cast

radio on Twitter Obviously go to the website

geek cast radio comm Alex. Where can they find

you? All over the interwebs. I basically monitor

and run the socials for this week in geek. So

it's at this week in geek Feedback at this week

geek net on Facebook. You know what to do Mike

what about you? Yeah, if you want to find you

I'm kind of taking a break from the whole social

media thing I mean I still post a little things

if you know where to find me You know where to

look but the best way to get a hold me is simply

at this week in geek Alex or I will Reply to

you or Mike at this week and geek net I do answer

each and every piece of fan mail usually as soon

as I get it Very cool. Very cool. We will catch

you next time folks because next time at least

here on geek cast radio We're gonna do episode

199 of the flagship podcast here And I believe

it's gonna be myself and optimus solo he posted

a magazine cover from entertainment weekly That's

like 25 years old or something or it was like

the top 25 stars of like 30 years ago or whatever

else So we're gonna have like a little discussion

on on that kind of thing for the next episode

of geek cast radio For twig, what's your all's

next episode? I don't know Oh 13th that is a

little bit of ways Fuck if I know the regular

show turd or treasure and yeah 13th dropping

on the 13th. We'll have one of our regular shows

Well, I guess as long as well I guess nobody's

doing anything for Easter necessarily So I was

gonna say we're uh it'll be the same day uh depending

when you drop this our regular twig show drops

at 7 a .m on mondays so so cool right around

there so there'll be some sort of ridiculousness

happening yeah we're not um we're not doing anything

for easter either we have a white chocolate rabbit

and a white chocolate duck who's yeah we're we're

basically i'm staying and doing nothing I am

going to continue the work that I have to get

finished because that's just kind of Oh, yeah.

Yeah review. Well, I've actually correction I'll

be playing Final Fantasy till I pass out and

then rise rise from the dead like Jesus Yeah,

I'm looking forward to getting into Persona.

I'm looking forward to getting into Final Fantasy

VII Remake as well. I'm just finishing Persona

V Royal. And then I'll have some thoughts about

some other big games that came out this month.

So good times. I'm also looking at the Judge

Dredd role playing game from, I got it from Modiphius,

but I think it's from one of their retail partners.

So anyway, that's all I got. Alrighty. I think

it's probably going to do it for the show. So

Without further ado, take us out. Should I play

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