Maid of Honor and Hearts and Minds

The Secret Origins Podcast, Episode 8. Hello

and welcome to episode 8 of the Secret Origins

Podcast. I am your host, TFG1Mike, and joining

me is the very tired, overworked, underpaid,

and hopefully passing school, Lupus Convoy. Hello,

sir. Hello, good sir. How are you? Uh, the better

question is how are you? Seeing you notice me?

Um, if there's any professors or teachers out

there, I just, I want to say, if you're going

to put on your final, especially if that... Part

of it is online, that it's six simple, short

answer questions. Don't expect two pages a question

with research cited off of EBSCO. If you do that,

you're just evil. Evil teachers. Where's the

faculty when you really need it? Funnily enough,

this same teacher has tried calling me seven

or eight times. Wow. For other reasons besides

the school. But she can't tell me what it is.

She can't leave a message. Hmm. Probably going

to need some more questions. That's a little

strange. Yeah. But anyway, how are you good,

sir? Well, I'm not really going to get into too

many specifics on air yet. It's just, I've got

shit going on in my life that... I don't know

what's actually going to happen, but we are recording

this Sunday, May 9th, 2010, Mother's Day evening.

And this past week I've gotten several calls

from my boss saying, well, I need you to come

in, I need to talk to you, blah, blah, blah,

blah. So I postponed it and postponed it until

tomorrow at 5 o 'clock, so Monday the 10th at

5. I don't know. The short answer is probably

I'm going to be homeless in about a month. I

honestly don't know. I really don't want to go

into too much more detail than that. So, let's

see. What else? Oh, yeah. I believe this is the

first show that I will be able to say this that

isn't a pre -recorded show. This month, with

whatever money I had left over, which I should

probably have put towards more incidental items,

I bought the Matrix set. Oh, wow. Yeah. Well,

I got it, I think, about $40, $50 cheaper than

I would from the Shout Factory site. Without

the shipping, it was $98 .49 on Amazon .com.

Wow. So it's not too, too bad. Let's see, what

else is going on? We actually have, Geekcast

Radio Network has a new partnership, sponsorship,

I don't really know what the heck to call it,

with blogomatic3000 .com. I will put their website

link in the show notes, and hopefully Steve can...

get it in the RSS feed as well. But yeah, there's

a lot of geek websites out there now, general

geek websites, not specifically Transformers

geek websites like TFW, but like Geek Tyrant

and ComingSoon .net and all these sites. Logomatic

is kind of like that. They actually are quote

-unquote UK affiliate, is what Michael Wilson,

our co -host on Beast Unleashed, wants to call

them, which is fine. I mean, they are based in

the UK. So I guess it could kind of give us a

little bit more international coverage. But,

yeah, basically, you know, I give them a weekly

thing of what episodes are coming out or what

episodes have been released. And they're going

to make a blog post about it, and we're just

going to, you know... Like, maybe I'll talk about

one or two of their articles or whatever. Their

head, the guy that runs the site, Phil Wheat,

did an awesome, awesome job on an Iron Man 2

review, which, by the way, I did go see Friday.

How was it? Oh, I love that movie. It's not as

good as the first one, but it's not a bad superhero

sequel. It's no Spider -Man 3. Everything was

handled very, very well. At first, when the recasting

of Howard for Cheetle was mentioned, oh God,

a year and a half ago or whatever it was, I was

very, very skeptical because I liked Terrence

Howard as Rhodey in the first movie and I wanted

to see him in the suit as War Machine. However,

seeing Cheadle in the role, actually in the movie,

it's not as bad as I thought it would be. Now,

Don Cheadle is an excellent, excellent actor.

I'm not disputing that whatsoever. It's just

when I heard his name in association with War

Machine and James Rhodes, Rhodey, whatever, it

just wasn't clicking for me at all. Until I saw

it, and I would have to say he hit it out of

the park. Awesome. He kind of looks a little

weird in the War Machine suit with the face plate

up, but other than that, it was awesome. How

was the chemistry between the actors? I mean,

I know they supposedly had really good chemistry

in Tropic Thunder. Oh, uh... Well, see, to me,

and I'm trying not to talk too much about it

because we're going to do a Geekcast Radio episode

reviewing Iron Man 2, like, first, you know,

theater dawn impressions, but I'll go ahead and

say this here. Honestly, the second movie, to

me, I don't know if you've ever seen the Iron

Man 94 cartoon. There was a two -part episode

called Armor Wars, or The Armor Wars, where Justin

Hammer... had basically stolen Tony's designs,

and in the cartoon he couldn't do anything about

it because he didn't copyright them or patent

them because patents are public knowledge, and

he didn't want the knowledge of his designs out.

The second movie is basically that plot line

with the whiplash stuff thrown in. It's not bad,

but when Rhodey and Tony are doing their thing

when they finally team up in the battle sequence,

It's Iron Man and War Machine going against a

bunch of drones, and it looks just like the Armor

Wars cartoon episode, except it's live action,

obviously. But no, the chemistry between them

is very well written. It's very well done. I

don't know if as far as it would be chemistry

from Tropic Thunder, because I think it's more

of character chemistry. Like, they really nailed

the chemistry between Rhodey and Tony as far

as at his birthday party, Tony was drunk in the

suit. He actually whizzed in the suit. Oh, no.

Yeah. And Rhodey shows up, and he's under orders

from the U .S. government and everything else,

and he's like, Pepper, look, you know, you've

got to put a stop to this or I'm going to have

to. And Tony's not listening to Pepper and blah,

blah, blah, blah, so... Rhodey goes downstairs,

suits up, comes upstairs with the faceplate up,

and he goes, I'm just going to say this once.

Everybody get out. Puts the faceplate down and

just repulsor blasts Tony. And it was just awesome.

It was just awesome. Everybody needs to go see

Iron Man 2. I want to go see it, but I don't

know when I'm going to be able to see it. Yes.

Anything else we want to bring up in the general

chat here? I might have something to report next

week, but I'm going to make a report this week.

Okay. That is comic related, and yeah. Okay,

good deal. Alright, so we are going to get into

some episodes. Previously on Justice League.

War brings you to the City of Lights. I never

miss a good party. Diana, I'd like to introduce

you to my fiancé. Vandal Savage is a Nazi war

criminal. He was... My grandfather, Vandal Savage

III. A pleasure to meet you. Look at what we've

got so far. A Kazanian operative stealing military

secrets. Kazania spearheading the International

Space Station. Good cover to circumvent the weapons

embargo they're supposed to be under. Platform

One is ours. It's Wonder Woman. Why don't you

have a word with her? It's the king. He's had

a stroke. If my father cannot rule, my duty is

clear. For the good of Cosmere, I must assume

the throne until my father is able again. The

people need reassurance of the royal family's

continuity. Our wedding will take place immediately.

First, we'll be starting off with Maid of Honor

Part 1. And Princess Diana, deciding she should

get out more, attends an evening party in Paris.

Besieged by curious onlookers, she is rescued

by none other than Bruce Wayne, who asks for

a dance. They're obviously enjoying each other's

company when terrorists drop in through the ceiling

and seize the young Princess Audrey, heir to

the throne of Kasnia. Don't you hate it when

they do that? Yeah. Bruce is about to slip away

and assume his secret identity, but finds it

unnecessary when Diana single -handedly rescues

Audrey and takes down the terrorists. Audrey

thanks Diana enthusiastically and invites her

to spend the evening with her club hopping. Audrey

explains she's getting married soon and wants

to enjoy her last night as a free woman. Later

that night, a trio of burglars break into Star

Labs' Paris facility to steal a microchip, but

Batman appears. He captures one while the others

escape. He tells Diana that the burglar is a

Kasnian Special Forces officer, part of a team

that has been stealing classified weapons and

technology. Diana confronts Audrey, who swears

that neither she nor her father know anything

about it. At her engagement party, Audrey introduces

Diana to her fiancé, Vandal Savage. Diana recalls

the Savage's involvement in World War II, but

he claims to be Vandal Savage III, the grandson

of the Nazi -era Savage. He is now administering

Kasnia's substantial contribution to an international

space station. In space, a team of Kasnian operatives

board the space station and take the crew hostage.

In Kasnia, a maidservant poisons the king on

Savage's orders, giving the appearance of a paralytic

stroke. Hearing the news, Audrey flies home immediately.

When Diana hears the news, she flies to intercept

their plane and warn Audrey. but is knocked out

by a sonic blast from Savage's henchman, Colonel

Vox. In Kasnia, Audrey decides that she needs

to assume the throne for the good of her country,

and as a sign of the royal family's stability,

announces that her wedding to Savage will take

place immediately. Oh, Joe. Oh, okay. Oh, God.

I have a note about that later. My first three

goes, excuse me, and then she flies up to the

chopper, knock, knock, like, you give up, right?

That was awesome. I gotta say, though, you know,

her not having to, or Bruce not having to, obviously,

become the goddamn Batman, she just rips the

lower half of her dress off and basically creates

a black version of the Wonder Woman outfit. That

was awesome. Well, if you're wearing a tight,

stinky dress, it's not very good in combat. Uh,

clubbing, huh? Diana's gonna learn a lot from

that. How to properly, uh... interact with people?

Yeah, really. Bach, your foreign language don't

faze the goddamn Batman. That was awesome. Even

in a foreign language, Batman can be a badass.

That is so awesome. And extremely intimidating.

I do, and you will. Yeah, exactly. I hate the

Audrey character. I honestly do. I cannot stand

her. She is such a bratty kid. I mean, it's nice

that she finally realizes in the end, and of

course we're not there yet, but it's nice that

she finally realizes in the end of what she has

to do as far as being responsible, but I hate

the whole setup. It's a long time getting there.

Oh, God, yeah. It's like 22 minutes of hell.

Paris Hilton animated. No, we've got to give

Audrey a little bit more credit. Well, in this

first part, it's pretty much Paris Hilton animated.

Oh, yeah. She was another little chihuahua. Yeah,

really. I have no idea why I wrote paparazzi

to the max, but I did. I have no idea what fucking

episode that happens, but... Cue the Lady Gaga.

Oh, God. Well, dang. No girl -on -girl action.

That sucks. Are we sure? Even I was like, huh.

Well, there's part of that scene where they're,

like, linking arms and blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, and I could have sworn there was a very,

very fast pan to where it looked like Audrey

touched her ass, but I don't know. See, I didn't

catch that, but it definitely made me go, hmm.

Exactly. Okay, and it's having a little bit too

much fun. Yeah. Eek! Vandal Savage is back. This

is the second time we see him in Justice League.

I believe the next time we see him is in Hereafter.

He's getting up there with Lex Luthor. That's

for sure. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, the end of

this one. Your services are no longer required,

Your Majesty. That was just... That was just

cold. It was. And this first part, I think the

rest of the lead finally shows up in the end

of the second part, but this first part is so

just a Batman and Wonder Woman episode. It's

a very shippy episode. Yeah. What about you?

What are you thinking about this one? Okay. In

the beginning, Diana looked absolutely amazing.

Yep. That was just awesome. Bruce saving the

day. And then... Let's see. Yeah, Bruce is a

chauvinistic pig making Diana do all the work.

No, he's not. He's like, oh, go to it. No, not

at all. Whatever. I disagree with that because,

you know, she's the first one to throw it in

everybody's faces that she can do whatever she

wants. Technically, he's not being a chauvinist

pig. Of course, they'll have a pig moment later

in Justice League Unlimited, but we'll get to

that way down the line. Oh, that was bad. That

was a bad pun, sir. Yeah, a bad pun. I explained.

Let's see, the whole chopper part. Uh -huh. Audrey

says, I've never seen somebody break a chopper

in half. She's like, oh, it was my first time.

Yeah, there's not innuendo there at all. No.

Let's see, I like what she said. How Audrey was

like, not many people like Kasnia. Not many people

in Kasnia like Kasnia. She does know how bad

it is, and she isn't trying to help her people.

She's more interested in partying. Yeah. I don't

know if they did that just to put that dichotomy

between now and her character development. Well,

you mean the whole Kasnian thing? Yeah. Well,

the whole Kasnia thing is... Kasnia is... Oh,

man, how... What can I link to here? Basically,

Kasnia is the DCAU's version of, say, Russia

or Iraq when Saddam was still in power. It's

pretty much the de facto military, you know...

Tutorialistic society. Yeah, pretty much. because

Casnia was first introduced back in Superman

the Animated Series with John Corbin stealing

the Lexo 6000 or something from Lex, some battle

suit that Lex was actually giving to Casnia.

So it's just one of those things where it's the

DCAU bad guys, general bad guys that have no

superpowers. Mm -hmm. Oh, okay, um, my brain's

kind of... Mush. Yeah, I'm trying to think of

something. Okay, so we see, uh, General Vox,

Colonel Vox, sorry. Yeah. Um, the only thing

I could think of when I saw him was one of the

guys from Venture Brothers. One of the villains

who had, like, this giant metal... Oh, um, Baron

Underbite. That's who I kept thinking of. Baron

Underbite? Yeah, he just has this giant metallic

chin. What the hell kind of a name is Baron Underbite?

Oh my god. That's funny. Well, he's this giant,

you know, metal chin, basically. Let's see. Again,

we already touched on them being very, very close.

When Diana went into the club, it seemed like

her mind was just totally blown. Among other

places. Yeah, she went to Hugh Hefner's party

in the prior episodes. I think that would have

inoculated her a bit for that culture shock,

but... What else? Audrey making the joke about

how Diana has feet of clay, which is kind of

a throwback to one of her origin stories. Yep.

How the hell can Diana afford, like, that apartment?

I don't think it was her apartment, though. Was

that the hotel she was staying at? Yeah, that

was the hotel that she was staying at, I think.

Yeah, because they were in Paris, still. But

how could she afford that? I don't know, maybe

she's making Wonder Bars or something on the

side like Flash does eventually. Um... helping

out Steve. That's not all she's helping Steve

with. Thank God for Viagra? Oh, damn. That's

even more wrong than my pig pun earlier. Think

about how old is he? How old is Vandal? Oh, God.

Oh, God, no. We'll get to that in part two. Oh,

my God. Okay, what else do I have? Bad dictator,

know your staff better. What are you still doing

here? I'm going to drink this poison drink. Really?

You didn't order wine. You would have thought

about that, maybe. Okay, I did notice that when

Vandal was holding onto the princess, and he

says, as you say, princess, the art quality really,

really jumped up tremendously. It was really

high -detailed, and I was like, oh, why couldn't

we have this all the time? It was very weird

to see Bruce, an actual image of Bruce, without

the whole Cape Cow in normal business clothes,

speaking with Batman's voice. It just seemed

really out of sorts for me. Which scene was this?

You mean when he was in the hotel room and they

were on the phone? Yep. Yeah. He's done that

several times throughout the DCAU. There have

been times... It's really weird. Well, I actually

like it because it's kind of cool. It's kind

of like, hey, I'm Batman, but I'm really Bruce

Wayne talking to you as Batman. It kind of goes

to the whole thing of, I forget who... Who stated

that, you know, Batman is the main personality

and Bruce Wayne is the mask more than the cape

and cowl? I know people have said it over and

over and over again, and I know people right

now are screaming at their iPods or iPhones or

fucking iPads, you know, saying, you know, it's

this guy or it was that guy, but somebody said

that, I think it was Kevin Conroy, actually,

now that I'm thinking about it, who said that

he thinks that... Batman is the true personality

and Bruce Wayne is the disguise. But I actually

like it because he's done it a couple of times

in BTS. I can remember specifically, what was

it, Over the Edge, which is the BTS episode that

the Scarecrow was in that supposedly it basically

showed what would happen if... Commissioner Gordon

found out that Barbara was Batgirl, and it's

basically Batgirl slash Barbara Gordon's worst

fears coming true. The fact that, you know, Commissioner

Gordon would find out that she's dead, and, you

know, he would hunt down Batman and everything

else. There was a scene in that episode where

he calls, Commissioner Gordon calls Bruce Wayne,

and, well, he calls Batman, and, you know, Wayne

picks it up and speaks in the Batman voice. He's

like, oh, you can just drop it, Bruce. We know

who you are. So I like it in certain parts. I

don't know. It just depends on when he does it

because it's so freaking cool, I think. Well,

that's just me. What the hell was that? Nothing.

Shall we work on the second part then? Yeah.

Because I think I'm out of points. Okay, good.

Okay. Actually, I did, for the briefest moments,

it was like Audrey put aside that childish stuff

and then was like, okay, I'm in charge. I'm my

daddy's girl. I'm taking over. I'm going to set

things right. And then she says that she's going

to marry Vandal. Way to just go back to that

backseat, girl. Proud of you. Okay, um, part

two. Yeah. In part two, Diana awakens in a French

farmhouse after her fall. Batman informs her

of Audrey's impending nuptials, and Diana flies

to Casney in a rage, followed by the Batwoman.

In a fight with Casney's military forces, she

throws a tank through the wall of the palace

chapel, just as Audrey is getting married. She's

incapacitated by Savage and taken prisoner. Feeling

humiliated, Audrey refuses to listen to Diana's

warnings. Audrey becomes queen, making Savage

the de facto ruler of Kasnian. He immediately

announces his plan via worldwide broadcast an

orbital whale gun has been mounted on the space

station, capable of firing asteroids at Earth

with pinpoint accuracy. To demonstrate, he fires

one at the ocean, creating a tidal wave that

sinks a U .S. Navy aircraft carrier group. Savage

claims dominion over all the nations of the world.

Seeing the broadcast, a Justice League team,

The Flash, John Jones, and John Stewart, head

for the space station in the Javelin, but are

shot down by the station's defenses. Audrey confronts

her husband. Savage admits that he's the original

Vandal Savage and is, in fact, over 25 ,000 years

old, and that he had poisoned her father. Audrey

flies at him in a rage, but is dragged away by

her own guards and locked in her room. In space,

Green Lantern's ring has kept John... Flash,

and himself, save from the explosion. They board

the station and fight to retake it. On Earth,

Batman frees Wonder Woman, and with Audrey's

help, they fight their way into the control center,

knocking out Savage and his henchmen, but not

before Savage initiates a meteor strike on Paris.

They are unable to prevent the real gun from

firing, but Batman changes the target to the

palace. He hits the evacuation alarm. While the

conscious guards and servants flee, he and Diana

evacuate Audrey, the unconscious guards, and

the paralyzed king. The asteroid hits, with Savage

still inside. In space, the rest of the League

evacuates the space station, which then self

-destructs. As Diana and Audrey inspect the ruins

of the palace, Savage emerges from underneath

the rubble, disheveled but apparently unharmed.

Audrey's guard sees him and drags him away. Diana

teases Batman, saying that they never finish

their dance. Batman says he doesn't know what

she's talking about. She smiles and says, if

you say so. but insists that they still have

to go dancing together. Okay. I think I like

this one a little bit better than... Part one?

Yeah. A lot of good quotes in this one, I thought,

especially from Wonder Woman. When Batman tells

her the wedding is happening now, like Hades

it is. I love that. For a minute there, there

was a scene when they're flying off, and Batman's

in the Batwing, and she's just, you know, flying

whatever. For a minute there, I thought he was

going to let it blow up, but he does eventually

let it, well, he doesn't let it blow up, it gets

shot down. But, yeah. I like how they switch

to the wedding with the bride music, and then

switch back to Wonder Woman fighting with the

bride music still playing. Yep. That was kind

of cool. It actually seemed really reminiscent

of the opera scene from The Fifth Element. Yep.

It was just that beautiful dichotomy that they

had going. Yep, very much so. Not that I dislike

Wonder Woman or Batman, but finally some other

leaguers show up. It's not some guy that can

speak to pigs? We've kind of hinted at this earlier

in season one of the show, the first six episodes,

that Jon Stewart is pretty much a hard -ass military

guy for the most part. What do you think of his

assumption of astronauts are military, they knew

the risks as far as saving them? I totally, totally

disagree. Well, because he also says, if it were

me, I'd want you to save the world, not come

after me, and then Flash goes, yeah, but we'd

come anyway. Yep. He seemed like a total... the

tool from season one that we've grown to hate.

Yeah, pretty much. Um, what a weak -ass javelin.

That thing blew it up real good. It does kind

of explain what happened to Javelins 1 through

6. Yeah, really. Uh, yikes, he's over 25 ,000

years old. Ew. Ugh. Um, another Flash one. Uh,

hold these, would ya? Sucker. Um, Well, that's

another thing we gotta bring up. This whole being

in space thing. Like, you know, they eject Flash

out into space. Technically, he should no longer

be. I mean, Green Lantern does get out there

and save him, but it's like, what the hell? I'm

trying to think of all the physics, and I don't

really even know what happens to a body in a

vacuum other than He should be exploding because

of the internal pressure. But I imagine with

his metabolic rate, he would have been out of

oxygen a long time ago. Yeah. Actually, my note

for that was, oh no, he's flash flaming in space.

He should be dead. It's like, really? GL is going

to fly out there and save him. Really, I'm pretty

sure by the time he got out to the airlock, he

would be dead. I forget who said it. Oh, no,

it was Wonder Woman. Okay. To Colonel Vox. We

need to bring up that she borrowed Audrey's diamonds

to put in her ears as blockers. She goes to the

end when she crushes his vox box. Not another

word. Somehow the comedy alternative to that

would have been quiet, you. Oh, God. You're still

taking me dancing. I like the fact that she kind

of knows or she either knew or figured it out.

I mean... I don't know. What about you? Well,

um, just when Diana says, like, Hades it is,

and then flies away, Bruce has got this, like,

crap -eating grin on his face. I'm like, yeah,

he just likes some feisty. And then she's going

in there, and I'm thinking, so you blew up part

of your new BFF's military might. How's that

working out for your friendship? It's going to

go well. So they're at the wedding. There's no

real paparazzi, yet she's doing this for a publicity

stunt to unify her people. That seems totally

illogical to me. But again, she's not that smart,

apparently, because she's, you know, marrying

Vandal Savage. And he becomes prince when he

marries a princess. But she gets bumped up to

queen. I'm not sure how that works. Well, now,

it's another thing we need to talk about. They

brought it up on the World's Funnest Podcast,

and I didn't listen to what Mike and James had

said about it, but they got a whole bunch of

emails as far as that goes. If the actual king

is still... but incapacitated. You can't become...

If you marry in, you can't become a king until,

I believe, that person passes away. I don't know.

It's a whole convoluted thing. I'm not really

sure. It didn't really bother me that he was

called Prince Vandal Savage because, as we all

know, it didn't turn out so well. No, but he

would probably just bump off everybody else in

the royal family eventually anyway. Yeah. What

else? KO the KO Black Bolt when she knocked out

Vox. Oh, yeah. It just popped in my head. Did

they actually get the king out? Because I don't

remember seeing the king leaving. That's the

other thing that was a point of contention. I

didn't see it either. I mean, there supposedly

is a frame where they were carrying him out,

but I don't know. I didn't see it, so I was like,

okay, just going to leave your daddy there? Or

did she already take him off life support? I'm

not really sure. I can't say. I have no idea.

And then the actress that played Audrey, her

accent slipped when she was being pulled away.

To general English, no European accent or vowel.

I was like, oh, okay. Diana's held up by some

sort of restraints against the wall. Just her

arms. She's about as strong as Superman. Why

doesn't she just, you know, kick out the stones

underneath her and take down the wall? No, her

legs were pinned, too. Were they? Yeah. Okay,

because I'm like, wow, she can take out the wall.

She doesn't want to take out the wall and offend

her friends, you know, damage her friends' jail,

but she can take out, like, four -fifths of the

military might of the country. No problem. See,

that's the other thing that pisses me off about

some of this stuff. I mean, honestly, restraints?

Seriously? And that also goes back to the Enemy

Below episode. Restraints in them... I mean,

come on. These people are fucking superheroes.

I mean, we've seen Superman breathe in space.

We've seen him breathe underwater. We've seen

Wonder Woman do similarly the same things. We'll

get to a later episode where she has to go up

against Devil Ray in Justice League Unlimited

where she actually has to go up. to the surface,

catch her breath, hold it again, and go under.

That makes no damn sense to me. I mean, we'll

get to it when we get to it, but it's one of

those inconsistency things. You know, you're

right. She could technically, whether her hands

and feet or just her hands were shackled, it

wouldn't have mattered. She could have still

pulled off that freaking wall. I don't know.

It just goes to show you that they're still trying

to find their footing. I mean, they've found,

like Bruce, Tim, and company, they found it in

season one, and they're going for it here in

season two, but it still shows that there's inconsistencies.

I guess it's just going to be the way it is for

a while. Yep. Okay, so we see the Flash. He comes

back. He's all, like, you know, not able to breathe.

really hungover from being out in space. And

he gets up and, like, takes out everybody. Mm

-hmm. And it's like, where has this been the

entire, like, season so far, the season before

that? Where the hell has this been? Well, I don't

know. But, uh, yeah. And it was funny about that

because, um... It also goes back to, you know,

what effects does space have on them? Because

when he was coming, when GL brought him back

in, Flash had his arms crossed across his chest,

and he's like shivering like he's freaking cold.

Obviously, space is probably cold. I don't know.

I've never been there. I don't plan on going.

But it's one of those things where... he's shivering

like he just came out of a deep freezer. It's

like, you know, it's like Jay and Silent Bob

locked Randall and Dante in a deep freezer or

something. I don't know. And then all of a sudden,

like you said, he gets up and goes punching everybody.

It's like, another thing about that, did you

notice after he punched the last guy, he shakes

his hand and says, ow? Yeah. It's nice to see

that he's actually being, he's useful. He's useful.

He takes out all the guards. He, like, does the

whole, oh, here, hold these, that sucker. You

know, it's nice to see him actually showing some

use instead of just being comic relief. Yeah,

I agree. Do we have anything else to say about

Inmate of Honor? Yeah, if you've got an international

space station with a giant weapon on there, why

didn't you just take out the weapon part? It's

an international space station. It's not belonging

to just one station. Well... And then boom! I'm

like, way to go, GL. Only you would cope with

something like that. Maybe your girlfriend Hawkgirl.

Oh, God. I can kind of explain it away. It goes

to the whole fact that Kasnia is on a... They're

supposed to be under a weapons embargo. And...

What's to stop them in the future of creating

weapons on the space station? Because they are

the ones that... Casnia was the country that

primarily funded the space station. So, you know.

No, they don't need it. Boom. It was just one

of those, like, it's an international space station

new tool. Why don't you blow it up? And then

what... Honestly, if you were Vandal Savage and

you know you have to deal with the Justice League,

they've foiled you once before. They happen to

have a floating space station. You happen to

have a railgun in space. Why didn't you blow

them up first? That's the other thing I want

to bring up. You know, they show the Watchtower

being in space. Okay? And they show this space

station being in space. Yet they don't ever show

them in the same frame or whatever. It makes

no sense to me how the space station can exist

in space and the watchtower can exist in space,

yet they never come into contact with them. Unless

the watchtower is over one side of the Earth

and the space station is over the other side

of the Earth. That makes no sense. Unless they

were... at different parts of, um, of that asteroid

belt. Yeah, true. I... It's just one of those,

um, analytical things that is gonna make our

brain hurt if we... If we... Yes, yes. I think

that's all I got, actually. Oh, wait, no, Vandal's,

uh, re -emergence out of the... Yeah. on the

Earth. He's all broken up, like, distorted, and...

Yep. ...the bone's resetting. It's like, how?

Kind of reminds me of, uh, the aliens in, uh,

uh, Secret Origins 3 -part from Season 1. All

right, well, we are going to move on. Fire in

the hole! Wait! Stop! What are we waiting for,

the Pythons? It's a sentient being. A what? It's

alive, in pain. It wants to make contact. Not

this time! I can almost connect with it. Charge!

We are officially spooked here. Hear me, oh children

of Kalinor. Behold, I am the Pytar, the living

soul of this planet. Gesperl is a great deceiver.

He has misused my power for his own petty ends.

I say unto thee, the Pytar is not a source of

hatred, but a beacon of hope. In times gone by,

Kalinor was a paradise. It can be again, but

thou must reject the dark ways of Despero and

scuttle into the night. The choice is thine.

Vaitar, do not forsake me! Oh, Vaitar. Now I

see. It's a miracle. It's just the normal life

force of your planet, reasserting itself after

centuries of entrapment. And you won't have to

worry about Despero anymore. Where is old Three

Eyes? He finally saw the light. Finally up today

is Hearts and Minds. Oh boy, here we go. Starting

off... for part one. On Randstad 7, a squad of

four Green Lanterns under the leadership of Cat

Matui are fighting an invasion force. They are

losing back to the caves. Four soldiers surrounded

by energy assault, uh, energy, uh, weapons assault

them, but the energy from the Lantern's power

rings is unable to pierce the shields. Uh, Galeus

and Arcus are, uh, attempt a breakout, but they

are killed. Catma orders Kellogg to get it to,

to escape and warn the guardians of the universe

how dangerous the enemy is while she covers his

escape reluctantly killer log leaves on earth

jon stewart and hot girl are making some repairs

to the station but hot girl made the mistake

of telling Lantern to adjust them clockwise,

which is counterclockwise on Thanagar. Oh, jeez.

I'll get... We'll get to that, but Jesus. Suddenly,

an unidentified object is detected on approach

towards Earth. Hot Girl, Flash, and Jon Jones

head for the Javelin 7. Wait, shouldn't that

be the Javelin 8? It got better. It got better.

Well, John goes to see what it is. Reaching the

impact site, he finds Kilowog barely alive. He

manages to tell John that they, quote -unquote

they, got Cadma, but passes out before he can

say any more. John tells the League to take care

of Kilowog and then heads off. No, he doesn't

just head off. He blasts out of that blast site.

I mean, he's just like, whoosh! Oh, jeez. Yeah,

really. Jean is able to heal Kilowog at the infirmary.

Kilowog says that his unit was trying to stop

the Legion of the Third Eye, a phatical cult

led by one Despero of Kalinor. Unfortunately,

Despero's forces were powered by something that

rivaled even the energy of the lanterns. He also

explains that Kamaturi was Jean's trainer in

the Corps. Kilowog is fit for duty, but he needs

to recharge his ring. And the only one available

is Jean's power battery. Meanwhile, John has

found Rancestead 7 and the remains of the G -Class

cruiser. His ring is able to track Cap Maturi

to Kalanor. Arriving, John finds a desert world

with broken people, two soldiers entertaining

a Kalanorian for having books, and John knocks

them out, only for the people to run in fear

of him. John decides to head undercover. On Earth,

Flash has taken Killhawk to John Stewart's apartment.

Oh, God. One thing with the battery is there,

as Kilowog searches fast just a little, exploring

and finds a full quart of Bob and Terry's. Nice

Ben and Jerry's reference. Oh, jeez. And a tape

of Old Yeller, both of which Kilowog eats by

mistake, declaring both delicious. I'll get to

that in a minute. You've got to remind me to

say something about the... the eating of Old

Yeller. Suddenly, Jon Stewart's landlady finds

them aware of Jon's day job. She assumes that

they're aliens and begins attacking Flash for

the broom. Calinor manages to find the battery

in a pocket dimension and the two leave. On Calinor,

Jon has tracked down Cat Maturi's living quarters.

Despite some initial resistance from Radoko,

He manages to enter the house and find her power

ring. Two brides subdue him and take him to the

royal palace. There he meets Despero, leader

of the Legion. Despero explains that once he

was an outcast for his third eye, but while traveling

in the desert, he was assaulted by robbers and

was saved by the flame of Pytar. The Pytar foretold

that Despero was to lead Kalanor to paradise.

Using the Pytar's powers, Despero took control

of Kalanor and... where the hell? and Despero

now intends to spread the glory of the Pytar

throughout the universe. Jon has heard enough

and attacks, but Despero's Pytar -given powers

are quite formidable. Fueled by his rage and

hatred, defeated, Jon is knocked to the ground

at the feet of the newest priestess, Kat Matui.

Despero orders her to sacrifice Jon to the Pytar

as she complies. She takes him to the Pytar's

central room, revealing the Pytar to be in massive

fire. Massive purpley fire, actually. Despite

John's pleas, Katma throws John into the Pytar.

In a room underground, Raduko and another Kalinorian

are working on a matter transporter. Despite

some technical trouble, they are able to rescue

John Stewart from the Pytar. The older Kalinorian

introduces himself as Shiflet, leader of the

Anti -Despero Resistance. The matter transporter

is not much, but it has saved a few. It was also

made by their newest member, Green Lantern, Cat

Matui, who enters to see John and overjoyed John

Runster and gets a right hook from Catma, who

chastises him for nearly blowing her cover. Catma

explains that Shiflet and his people rescued

her and helped her get into the palace as a priestess.

She knows that Despero is raising a massive force

for conquest, but doesn't know the specific plans.

John gives Catma her power ring, and they share

a passionate kiss. At the palace, Despero empowers

his soldiers with the power of the Paitar, which

they will use to spread the greatness of Despero

and the Paitar across the universe, and the Legion

of the Third Eye goes forth as horrified Catma

watches. Uh, thoughts? Let's see, uh, yay, more

Green Lanterns! More Green Lanterns! Um, when

at first I saw Catma, I thought it might be,

um, someone else, but it dawned on me, oh wait,

this is probably Catma, considering we've got

John in this. Um, let's see, uh, at first I didn't

know what the bad guys were. I thought they were

accordions, maybe. But they killed two Green

Lanterns right from the beginning part of it.

Yeah, my first note, there goes Galleus and that

bearded guy. Because I never could remember Argus'

name. Because I've only seen him once before,

which was in Blackest Night. Right. They showed

up like just once. God, what else? Yeah, we got

to see... We got to see Kilolog again. Him actually

say Poozer, which was just like, oh, yes! I'm

surprised they're bringing in Kat Mature and

they're not bringing up the fact that in the

comics they were married. Which was the whole

monkey wrench and the whole romantic triangle

thing. Well, see, the thing with that is, though,

because he's actually supposedly going to start

dating Hot Girl. You know, I mean, that... We're

building up to that. That'll actually happen

at the end of Wild Cards. But, I mean, they showed

that they have a passion or had a passion, so

I don't mind it, but, you know, you're the comic

guy. I'm all for it. An interesting side note

is that Cat Matui is from the same planet as

Sinestro. That's kind of scary. The landlady's

freaking awesome. I love that landlady. Yeah.

If we need a replacement for Hawkgirl, we'll

let you know. The VA for Desperado. The voice

actor was just... Oh, Keith David is amazing.

It was awesome. Keith David is just one of the

best voice actors. Um, as far as voicing, like,

this type of role, you've seen, um, New Frontier,

right? Yeah. He was the voice of the Void thingy.

Oh, that's true. Completely forgot about that.

Oh, what else do we have? Um, Deathbro's whole,

like, uh, monologue, I guess? Yeah. He's going

over, like, feel my heat, feel my rage. Yeah.

Red lanterns represent heat, rage, and they destroy

green lantern power. So it was like, oh, that's

a little Easter egg there. Probably not intentional,

but very cool. I like that. All right. There

was an animation error where suddenly the rings

on John's fingers disappear again, as usual.

I don't know if it was an animation error. I

think it was... From when Desperate blasted him

or whatever, when they blasted each other and

they both ran out of energy or whatever, and

Desperate won, it's kind of like when they cut

the ring off, completely off, they destroy the

ring in Starcrossed. I think they were kind of

going for that same type of thing where, oh,

wait, he broke his finger. The ring can no longer

work anymore. Sure. Yeah, so he's kind of got

a little thing going on with her girl, and then

he's smooching Katna. Okay. Two -timing bastard.

Hot wing threesome? Barbecue hot wing sex threesome.

Yeah. You can go for that. Let's see. Yeah, was

it totally intentional to make her look like

Slave Leah? Possibly. And, um... Leaves very

little to the imagination, I'll tell you that

much. I've been wondering, though, she gets the

ring back. Yeah. Where the hell did she put it?

Because that thing doesn't have pockets. Yeah,

exactly. Yeah, I've got a note about that in

part two, so we'll get to that in part two. What

else do you have? The salute that they were doing,

was that intentionally supposed to be like Nazi

Germany salute? Could be. Just to drive home

the whole fascist situation of the state? Probably,

yeah, I would say so. That's all I got. Go for

it. What do you got? Okay. Well, I already mentioned

the whole Gallius and Argus getting killed. Kilowog

was the only survivor from the Lantern team that

was in that battle. Does that mean he gets a

million bucks now? Oh, my. You sound like an

old married couple, which I believe is what Flash

says to GL and Hawkgirl. And they're just stunned

in silence, and he goes, oh, that's better. Yeah.

Flash reads comics. Good man. He was teacher's

pet. Go GL. Oh, that was the... I mainly, most

of my notes are mainly just one -liners. One

of the ones from GL was, I'm here on business

from Despro. He was trying to get rid of one

of the guards or something. I don't remember.

You already mentioned if we ever need a replacement

for a hot girl. I don't remember what the hell...

I wrote down in all capital letters, Hey, she

can't do that. And I don't remember what the

hell it was about. Probably throwing him in.

Oh, yeah. You're right. Yep. Wow, Despot is just

a power -mad despot. Yeah, but that's pretty

much all I have. I don't know. I like this episode,

but it's not one of my favorites from Season

2. I mean, this batch of episodes we're talking

about here today, these are not episodes I will

go back and watch for fun. These are episodes

that, if I need to watch them, I'll watch them.

But, I don't know, this one just doesn't really

enthuse me at all. It's basically, you know,

honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, it's

basically Vandal Savage with a third eye on a

different planet, colored purple. With Keith

Cannon's voice acting. Alright, so getting into

part two here. At the resistance base, Katma

informs the group what is going on and that Desperado

will be able to expand his legion by bringing

in a new converse. John decides to mobilize the

Green Lantern Corps and prepares to head to Oa.

However, a legion task force reaches the base

as Katma springs to action. Which I'll bring

up in my first note when we get to that. John

finds that he can't use his ring. Grabbing a

weapon, he gives covering fire as the Resistance

scrambles for the secondary site. Unfortunately,

tanks block them off and Resistance is corned

when the Justice League and Kilolog arrive and

help them out. The Resistance and the League

regroup at the secondary site Ancient Catacombs

with untranslated inscriptions. Jaune is able

to interpret some of them, and they indicate

that Kalinar once was a thriving ecosystem instead

of the desert world of today. Shiflet does say

that there are legends of a paradise, but...

Raduco dismisses them as ancient drawings. Meanwhile,

John and Catma are trying to figure out what

is wrong with his ring, but Catma soon realizes

that it is. Despero did something to John, who

does admit that he feels like something is missing.

Catma decides that the only way to help him is

to retrain him step by step. At the palace, Despero

reviews the... Reviews the officer in charge

of capturing the resistance, Despero orders the

officer to go into the desert and await a vision

from him as a penance. That guy had gone back.

The officer gives his praise to Despero, who

informs his minister, Chris Black. Wow, that's

a horrible name to have. Oof. that the officer

won't be back. Chris Black asks why the resistance

is so dangerous if there are so few, and Desperate

replies that they could corrupt the movement.

Only Desperate is the voice of the Pythar. No

one may challenge him. In the catacombs, John

is still having trouble concentrating with his

ring. He angrily decides to take a break and

vents to Hot Girl. The captain still treats him

like a raw recruit. Hot Girl says that that's

common for people to see others as they best

remember them, and she says that as someone who

knows him in the here and now, she wants him

to get back to work or face her wrath. Meanwhile,

John... has reasoned that Despero is using a

PyTar similar to the energy of the Green Lantern's

use, which powers his legion. They must destroy

the PyTar to defeat Despero. But Katmiss says

that the PyTar is a self -sustaining nuclear

plasma reaction. Kilowog then announces that

he can build a carbon bomb, which will negate

the reaction. When all else fails, go for the

carbon bombs. It doesn't work better. Star Trek

reference. At the palace, Desperate is speaking

to the Pytar, assuring that the conquest is going

well. Chris Black enters with Roduko, fucking

traitor, who announced that he wishes to join

the winning side and will betray the resistance.

Desperate orders a strike force to take out the

resistance. All the Catacombs are at the Catacombs.

John has given up on retraining and is arming

himself. Catma fears that John will have to be

sent back for training on Oa and that Kyle Rayner

will take over his sector. I would have actually

liked that to happen. I know it didn't happen,

but that would have been kind of cool to see

Rayner in a full -time Justice League deal. Hot

Girl chastises Catma for giving up on him and

gives a few words of encouragement to John. Suddenly,

the Legion attacks, and Catma seals off the section

of the catacombs that Flash and Kilowog and John

are in. The Resistance attack, but the Strike

Force has Pytar -empowered soldiers with them.

Taken to the tunnels in the palace, Desper decides

to work his will on the two lanterns. At Hot

Girl, he overwhelms Cabba and prepares to do

the same to Hot Girl, considering making her

part of his personal, um, reason. Yeah, something,

I don't know what the hell that damn word says.

With an act of sheer willpower, John calls his

powering to him, frees himself, and attacks Despero.

John and Despero are evenly matched, but John

manages to score a symbolic victory by hitting

Despero's third eye, leaving the imprint of the

powering on it. I didn't even notice that. I'll

have to go back and look at that. That was kind

of cool. Elsewhere, Flash, Kilowog, and John

make it to the Pytar chamber with the carbon

bomb. Getting past the guards, Kilowog arms the

device and seals the doors. Before he can throw

it in, John tells him to stop. The Pytar is a

sentient being. In pain and hopes to make contact,

before he can further explain, John jumps into

the Pytar as the soldiers, priests, and priestesses

make their way to the chamber. Jaune rises from

the Pytar, bathed in flame and with a third eye.

The Pytar says that it is the natural life force

of Kalinor which has suppressed... Eons ago,

Despero was the release of the Pytar and let

it restore Kalanor's ecosystem, but used it for

his own petty ends. The Pytar offers paradise,

but the Kalanorians must reject Despero. The

Kalanorians bow down to the Pytar as the soldiers

cast away their weapons. Jaune falls to the floor

and the Pytar turns into a great tree. Wow. Knock

off all this tree -hugging hippie crap. Did you

think of beast machines? We'll get to that in

a minute. On Kalanor, green foliage spreads across

the desert. Shiflet declares it a miracle, but

Jaune says that it was just the state of Kalanor.

Kama and Kilowog will remain behind to help the

Calorians rebuild and readjust while the League

heads back to Earth. John takes them home, his

will restored, and he tells Hot Girl that some

things can't be taught. Some people get through

experience, and when she asks him what he responds,

it's clarity. Yes, I kind of did, but not really,

because Beast Machines was tech - or technorganic

or whatever the hell it's called. Yeah, I mean,

I guess you could draw that line, but I don't

know. It wasn't really... It was more trees.

It was more organic than it was anything else.

Let's see. Earlier I mentioned about the whole

cat thing. If she goes under her GL garb, doesn't

that give her cover away? Pretty much. Oh, God.

Katma trained Kyle. Very cool. That was very

cool. Why is it... I actually only have four

saw a hot girl smack GL's ass, I think of Puddle

of Blood song control? On my final note, which

will eventually become a running gag or a running

count, but this is the first time that GL says,

light him up! He does this again. Can you give

me a case of hair give me strength? Could be.

Sounds a hell of a lot better than that, though.

I'm trying to think. I think the next time he

says that would be the Amazo episode when he

comes back. The return in Unlimited. What about

you on this second part? A faulty ring. At this

point I was kind of wondering if Katma might

be under the influence of Despero. Um, so I'm

like, huh, did she switch rings? I didn't know

what was going on. Um, the flash hitting on Katmuk

because, you know, she's breathing and she's

female. I think he still is, you know, arguable

about the breathing thing. Um, the Kyle Rayner

name drop, that was awesome. I don't like Kyle

at all, but awesome. Um, a living flame, and

what does John do? He throws himself into it.

Isn't he afraid of fire? Isn't that like his

one big weakness? Yeah, I... I'm not sure. Well,

wait, isn't it yellow? That's his weakness? Or

not yellow, but... Yeah, isn't it like... It's

fire. Well, it's fire, but... This fire was purple.

Anything purple, it rolls. Okay. Yeah, the whole

spooky -looking John, I think that was really

badass when he was possessed. Yeah, that was

a good image there. And now we start seeing John

really starting to make shapes in other forms.

We saw it happen a couple times in other episodes,

but this time it was really brought to the forefront

that he can do something else besides simple

laser beam and Big Bubble. Right. Yeah, I got

G -O -H -G. I have no clue what I wrote that

down for. G -O -what? Oh, GoHotGirl. GoHotGirl.

Oh! Okay, yeah. GoHotGirl. Smack that ass. Pretty

much. Yeah, and then at the end, just big, big

shippy moments. Yeah. That's one of the reasons

why I don't like this two -parter, is because

Now that I've re -watched it, I really kind of

get what, and I know you don't listen to this,

but I will constantly be comparing our notes

to World's Funnest Podcast notes because they'll

bring up stuff that I may not catch on at first

when I'm first taking my notes, but Michael David

Sims over there said that this could have easily

been a one -parter. I mean, you could have easily

gotten this story done in 22 minutes. and not

have it seem too rushed. I don't know why this

needed a two -parter, but that was their format

in the first two seasons of two -part stories.

I don't know, it's just one of those episodes

where, meh, it's not the worst thing ever. I

don't think anything in season two can be compared

to the worst thing ever so far. But yeah, that

episode that shall not be named. It's not one

of their best ones. I don't like the plot. I

really don't like the plot at all. It's not exactly

the best, no. No. Not at all. You have anything

else, sir? That's all I got. All right. We are

going to move into the outro. Target destroyed.

Vandal, what do you think you're doing? Destroying

the Justice League, building a railgun, assuming

total dominion over the nations of the Earth.

You're ranting like your grandfather in an old

newsreel. Sweet foolish child. Wonder Woman was

right all along. Ridiculous. You'd have to be

over a hundred years old. I'm far older than

that. The first time a meteor granted me power

was over 25 ,000 years ago. While my fellows

cowered with fear, I dared approach the strangely

glowing rock. It was warm. The night was very

cold. I slept curled up next to it, not realizing

what its rays were doing to me. But over the

millennia that followed, as I watched those around

me grow old and die, while I remained unchanged,

I discovered the truth and came to accept my

destiny. Destiny? I live to rule. Delusions of

grandeur aside, I rule Chasmia. That's why I

married you. It's also why I poisoned your father.

You... This is quote number one of episode eight.

Who are you working for? This is quote number

two of episode eight. You know, we never did

get to finish our dance. I don't know what you're

talking about. If you say so, but you're still

taking me dancing. All right, well, before we

get to the outro, just overall, for me, made

of honor and hearts and minds, they're okay stories.

They're not the worst stories in Justice League

Seasons 1 or Season 2, but they're just not something

I'd watch for fun. I like them. I mean, they're

not stellar performances, but it's something

to put on the background. Yeah, I mean, there's

certain things that I liked. Like I said before,

the whole Diana, Bruce, Batman, Wonder Woman

thing, that's cool. You know, there's certain

aspects that I like, but the overall plots for

both two -part episodes kind of sucked. Yeah.

They could have been one -shot episodes. Yeah,

they could have. All right. So, thank you for

joining us here on the Secret Origins podcast.

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you enjoyed this episode of the Secret Origins

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we will be reviewing three more stories from

Justice League Season 2, those being A Better

World, Eclipse, and the terror beyond. For now,

I am TFG1 Mike with this cover. Thank you for

listening. Until next time.