The TeleCast

You Can’t Do That On Television

September 23, 2011 1:22:32 EXPLICIT
The TeleCast You Can’t Do That On Television
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About this Episode

Episode 26: The guys start a brand new block that can only be described using words like crazy, zany or off the wall!  The block begins with the original insane Nickelodeon show, You Can’t Do That On Television. Before Double Dare, Clarissa, Hey Dude, or Salute your shorts was this epic show. Nothing before or ...

This is Nickelodeon stay tuned for you can't

do that on television, but first this As you

said I'm your host Optimus Solo and I would like

to say hello and welcome to the 26th episode

of the telecast brought to you by the GeekCast

Radio Network and today we begin a brand new

block of shows that I can only describe as our

off -the -wall block I guess we've had game shows

we've had You know, like the Save by the Bell

block. We've had the Educational block. And I'm

just going to call this one the Off the Wall

block. And what better person to join me for

an Off the Wall content than JT from Saskatoon.

Hello. Hello. It's like I have a rep amongst

the geek cast. I don't know where I was going

with that, but I thought it sounded good. It's

hard to say. Everything I say is completely kosher.

Exactly. So today JT and I are going to be talking

about That's right folks we were talking about

you can't do that on television So apparently

we can do that on the podcasting But before we

get too far into our discussion quick background

information on you can't do that on television

it debuted Apparently not everybody knew this

talking about you Blanchard 1979 and it ran until

1990 it was a Nickelodeon show eventually it

didn't start off as one obviously It was a 30

-minute show I guess technically it's listed

as lasting 10 seasons. I've seen other things

that say it lasted 15 seasons. I think it depends

on when you count the actual beginning of this

show versus its early incarnations. And there

were somewhere around 143 episodes. For those

of you that don't know, You Can't Do That on

Television was basically a live action sketch

comedy slash variety slash Slime show for kids.

I don't know what other way to describe you can't

do that on television JT It's almost like SNL

for kids in a way. Yes SNL for kids and then

place it in the 70s or 80s version and Yeah,

it's basically a show with all kids except for

about two people Yeah, what do you remember about

this show? I remember when I was really young

and I first started getting into TV and I'd see

just the intro for this, it kind of freaked me

out. Yeah, because you got the conveyor belt

with kids getting put together on this assembly

line and then they're pouring out a water tap

and then this guy is getting a stamp to the face

and he, you know, basically goes Humpty Dumpty

and splits in two and... That always got me a

little bit. It almost looked like it hurt. Well,

yeah, I mean when I was like four, five like

that, it's like, okay, I don't know where this

is going. But no, I loved watching the show.

It had like a lot of the recurring skits and

everything was just, it was funny. And it's like

that type of jokes that I still love to this

day is just dumb gags, you know, the belly laughs,

you know. It's kind of like the living embodiment.

I saw this quote from John Lithgow once that

says, Intelligent comedy is all well and good,

but nothing's better than a good, dirty laugh,

which is kind of what I got from this show. It

just made me laugh and I enjoyed it. There's

very little I didn't like about the show, if

any. Right. And this is basically, to me, this

is the earliest show I can ever remember watching

on Nickelodeon. I didn't even know this was on

Nickelodeon until I was doing research for the

show. I mean, that's kind of cool, you know,

something goes together. It's kind of like Superman.

It was born in Canada. Right. I mean, besides

Pinwheel, which is kind of like was its own channel

at one point, I believe, which transitioned into

the 1979 launch of Nickelodeon. And this, I believe,

was one of the very first shows and for sure

was the first popular show that really got Nickelodeon

some attention. Oh yeah. And it just dominated

ratings when it came out. And like I said, this

is just what I remember. This came before everything

that everyone else thinks of when they think

of Nick. This is way before Clarice Explains

it all. This is way before Pete and Pete or Hey

Dude or Salute Your Shorts. This is the early

days of Nickelodeon. It's kind of like what we

talked about in another episode. When a channel

is first starting out, they're usually willing

to push the limits and go places no one else

has gone in order to get themselves recognized

and some attention. Oh, yeah. No, it's like how

Fox started in the mid to late 80s. They had

the Monsters Today and Werewolf and all sorts

of stuff that was just married with children.

It's just stuff that they were pushing the envelope.

And I just find it odd, it's like they're doing

something new and different so all of a sudden

they're pushing the envelope, you know, finger

quotes, because no one else, you know, it's just

they're staying true to formula. It's like to

break through the barrier that is whatever else,

the other established channels, you have to go

crazy and like off the wall to get your name

out there. And then it seems like after so long,

then all of a sudden you almost become just like

all the other channels and you don't do any of

that stuff anymore. You become irrelevant, you

know, and it's weird that you say this is like

one of the debut shows Nickelodeon I didn't know

Nickelodeon started that late You know like the

the late 70s early 80s. I thought it was like

late 80s or something No, no, yeah early 70s

and it was it was this it was Stuff like mr.

Wizard's world, you know today's special pinwheel

special delivery And then it kind of transitioned

into the 80s once you get into the Double Dare

years and stuff like that. Cartoons and all.

Yeah. But at the beginning it was a lot more

of this live action, almost sketch -like shows.

And like I said, this is just one of my earliest

memories of Nickelodeon at all. So hopefully

a little history lesson for people out there

that thought Nickelodeon started with Clarissa

Explains at all. No. But yeah. from the top.

I love the show. It's a combination of that intro.

It's a combination of all the regular sketches

and the characters. It boils down to what you

said before. It boils down to stuff that kids

aren't allowed to do or aren't allowed to say

or things that would be looked at as questionable.

That's the thing. When you look at this show

and you just look at how it goes with the We'll

get into characters later, but you had the really

gross chef, Barth, who basically runs this cafeteria.

The guy cooks rad. They talk about him cooking

rats and cockroaches and cutting up health inspectors

and putting them into the burgers. Not that he

ever actually did all that, but it's because

he made such gross food that kids would go, well,

this has got to be. You know, cannibalism. But

you couldn't do a suggested humor or suggested

jokes like that nowadays because some parents'

right groups, some busybody soccer moms, some

political correctness. This show would not get

put on the air today because of all the PC Nazis

out there. You can't have originality in television.

People might get ideas. Right. If there was a

kids' sketch comedy today, it would be so cheesy.

It would be iCarly. Actually, though, there is

a kids' sketch comedy today. It's called So Random

on the Disney Channel, and it sucks. Since you

mentioned it, we might as well get into some

of the cast and the characters and whatnot, but

we're not going to talk about all of them, folks,

because there was over 100 child actors that

appeared between 1979 and 1990. There was always

kids coming and going. There was obviously some

that stayed the course for most of it, but there

was way too many people to mention all of them.

I'm just going to start with the ones that I

know for sure and then I'll let you touch on

some of the ones that maybe you remember. Everybody

should remember the adults in this series though.

The main man, the guy who played every male adult

on the show was a man named Les Lye. Oh yeah.

And he is the guy that's in the introduction

getting stamped on the forehead. He's playing

Barth the chef. He plays the dad. He plays the

Latin executioner. He plays the principal slash

teacher. I mean, just all the male characters

he plays. And to me, he is this show. Oh, yeah.

More than anything, I mean, we'll get into another

character or actor who's just as much the show

as this guy. I mean, he was there from beginning

to end. You know, he plays, you know, Barth,

like I mentioned, Barth, the nasty cafeteria

chef, you know, just, I heard that. And his voice

was just awesome. I know the guy just, you know,

he could tweak it just so he knew it was always

less lie. And it's just the dude was funny. And

he's kind of a contemporary of another live action

kid show that I watched growing up. Cause I would

watch like two, cause the show, it was from what

I read in doing my research, it was originally

an hour and then they cut it back to a half hour.

So I would watch like, you know, two shows back

to back. And then I would watch the hilarious

house of Freidenstein, which was this horror

kind of monster -themed, you know, semi -educational

kids show that was debuted in the very early

70s, and it was all built around this guy, Billy

Van, who played like 90 % of the characters on

screen. He was very much a contemporary of Les

Lye. You can see why, because they're both these

workhorses and Les Lye just had all this fun.

As much as I liked Barth and the dad, my favorite

character he did was Ross the stagehand. He was

on the show. He was, you can't do that on television.

I talk about his voice. He also was the voice

of Professor Coldheart in all the Care Bear specials.

Oh, don't bring the show down. I'm sorry. But

anyways, but yeah, to me, I don't know. Yeah,

you said this Ross the stagehand was a good gig

where he was just interacting with the kids and

giving them stage direction and stuff like that.

The dad was so sloppy, creepy, like married with

children type dad. Just the way he was made up

and he was like so disgusting. It just, he really

looked. like he was a zombie. They just give

him that wigged out look like that. And I really

liked the executioner and Barth, but we'll get

into those individual segments a little bit more

later. But Les Lye was, like you said, he was

there from the beginning. He was basically the

show. And then the other adult who came in in

1982 was a lady named Abby Hagyard. And interestingly

enough, I actually just talked to her on Facebook

the other day. Oh, really? Yes, I did. because

I was trying to, I know you're not going to like

this, but I was trying to find out some more

voices from these Care Bear specials because

it's uncredited on, or they're credited but not

as which characters they do. And so I looked

her up on Facebook and I actually had a discussion

with her on the chat in Facebook as she was talking

to me about this or that. But she was the main

adult female and she would be the mom to Les

Lies' dad in most of the scenes. If there was

ever a need for an adult female, Abby was that

one. Oh, yeah. No, it's the big red Afro, basically.

Big head of curly hair. She's always like that

June Cleaver. It's like, oh, that's fine, dear.

But then something disgusting. It was definitely

not the set of parents you would want. My parents

were never like that, but I wouldn't put it past.

society produce parrots like this? You'd have

to worry about yourself every time you sat down

for dinner if you were in this household. I mean,

there's only so much river and Brussels sprouts

that a man can take. Exactly. As for the kids,

I really only remember a couple. The first one

would be Al Stair, Al Stair Gillis. He was kind

of the second official host. He was on for a

few years in the mid -80s. He's just the main

kid that I remember as far as boys go. And then

the other one that I remember is the first host,

the first official host, which is Christine McClade.

She was the brunette. And she was on there for

a good seven years or so. And she was a little

bit older than the rest of the kids I do remember.

Yeah, I think she had like three or four years

on everyone else. Yeah, I think she started when

she was about 15, whereas most of the other ones

were probably starting more in like sixth grade

age group. like 12 or something. I can't believe

I forgot to leave. I left her off my crush list

and maybe I'll have to amend that but I had the

biggest crush on Christine or Moose as she was

known. She just had that face but she was funny

and she did kind of lead the show. Like I said,

as much as Les Lye was the heart of the show,

she was up there too in terms of You know being

the show. Yeah, and occasionally she would play

like some adult roles kind of yeah, if there

was a need for another one She's almost the straight

woman to like everyone else. Yeah She was just

bigger and older than everybody else. I do remember

that like bigger. I mean taller And then there

was there was a few other people and I remember

them on camera but I don't necessarily connect

them with their names and of course we would

be we'd get some stuff thrown at us if we didn't

mention the One person who showed up who okay

before you mentioned that the one guy one character

I want to mention and I didn't know this until

I was doing my research for this yesterday One

of the kids was on there for just like one of

the last years towards it was Vic Sahe Who if

you watch Chuck he plays? Lester Patel Who's

like this, you know Smarmy little East Indian

dude who thinks you know just way he thinks he's

way more than he actually is I didn't know that

him and his brother were actually on this show

I Just thought that was really cool. It's like

holy crap. I Wow You know he was Canadian There

you go learn something new every day exactly

And then the person I was talking about, of course,

that everybody connects with, You Can't Do That

on television, was Alanis Morissette. Yes. For

the pop star. In 1986 and 1987, Alanis Morissette

was in the cast of You Can't Do That on television.

So you can see her before she became what she

later on would be. And there are YouTube videos

of her online as her characters from You Can't

Do That on television. Now one thing, basically

all of these people When they're on You Can't

Do That on television, they're playing themselves.

There's no characters outside of the adults.

Basically these people are all playing them and

they were called by their names. They were playing

their own roles. Minus one, there was one character

that did get a show name because he was related

to somebody that worked for the show. And I can't

remember which guy that was. But basically they

all are playing themselves. It was interesting.

I mean the one thing that kept the show kind

of fresh to me was that the kids were always

changing There was always new kids on different

episodes and as the years went by kids some people

left some people came and you know I remember

my time at the time when I was watching this

as a kid having some that I liked better But

I would really have to sit down and watch a lot

of episodes today to remember which ones I were

my favorites and which ones You know, I didn't

care for I Just remember those that were on I

guess longer than the other ones Yeah, no, I

I knew mainly the cast from like, you know, basically

85 on was really when I started watching The

show that's kind of where I went from but you

do remember kids like Alice there. There was

a Little blonde boy. I forget his name. He was

usually the one that they would give a lot of

He would usually the one that had like a lot

of you know, just the snappy comebacks already

in their place He was kind of tiny Yeah, he was

like one of the smallest kids they ever had on

the show And I will say that the kids you know

I mean you're gonna get some bad acting because

it's all amateur 12 year olds basically doing

this But it almost added to the charm of the

show No, it certainly did something about like

I said earlier. It's just it was kind of dumb

jokes But it's when it's told from the kids like

that. It's just It just seemed funny because

it seemed a little more innocent. They told the

joke because it was funny and that's it. There's

no afterthought. Where are we going to go from

here? It's just like, boom, funny, done, let's

move. It kind of worked because you had two amazing

actors and the two adults paired with kids that

really didn't know what they were doing. It made

it somehow as a formula that works. I know some

people would probably watch this today if they've

never seen You Can't Do That on television. They

didn't grow up with it. They'd probably watch

it on YouTube and be like, �This is terrible

acting or this is terrible this or that.� They

kind of played it almost straight, the comedy.

That was the thing. When it was a joke, they

would laugh, but when they're doing the skits,

they're just playing it straight. That's where

the humor came from. It's entirely subjective.

Totally relatable for people that are watching

it. Exactly, you know, it was just funny like

we got like, you know, you mentioned like the

execution Like we're listening would play that

sound like, you know, the you know Castro ask,

you know South American Dictator and which is

one of the best bits of the show It's just the

way they played it. They almost played it Completely

straight and the humor just spun out of the situation

more than what they were saying Well and as a

kid you could easily picture yourself on screen

as in place of one of the kids that was there.

Oh yeah. It's not like you were like, oh I can't

do that or you could easily fit in and play those

roles. Exactly. Alright. Anything else on characters

that we didn't talk about or any individuals

that you want to mention? No, I mean, like I

said, there was the executioner that I really

liked. I liked Barth. As much as Leslie was a

character in the show as much as his character

Russ Barth was like the big Recurring skit who

was like this disgusting cafeteria worker, you

know cough and sneezing the dude was smoking

on camera That's another thing. You could not

do the show today How far smoke you could get

almost everything else on but he couldn't smoke

right? He also couldn't cough over the food because

then you know Somebody would complain, but no,

Barth was like the great character because he

would sit there telling the kids about, you know,

the health inspector, you know, being high. It

was like, what did you get him a burger from

across the street to get him off your back? He's

like, no, I gave him a Barth burger. They're

like, yeah, what happened to the health inspector?

And they always had this recurring, well, two

recurring gigs with Barth was, you know, what

do you think's in the burger? And then Barth

would go, ah. Then you know something would happen

the kids would all start puking over the side

of the booth and then bars there with a book

It's like oh wait, let me get that. Let me get

that Yeah, you know, it's just fun. And like

I said, you just couldn't do stuff like this

nowadays It's got to be like, you know, I Carly

or Hannah Montana or some crap like that Because

you know, it's PC. It's safe and the lawyers

have given the stamp of approval. Yeah, I Think

that transitions really well then into our next

segment, which is The Bad. The Ugly. That's right,

it's time for the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

Oh, you can't do that on television and there's

a little of everything. Starting with the theme

song. The theme song basically is the William

Tell Overture, which is played a little bit different.

I mean, it's William Tell Overture performed

in like a Dixieland jazz arrangement. And the

theme song itself stays the same throughout the

series, but the animation behind it changes somewhat.

Yeah, and very Monty Python -esque. Yeah, it's

Monty Python slash Pink Floyd slash, I mean,

it's very interesting visually. Oh yeah, because

like I said in the beginning, it's basically

the original setup was basically someone launching

the Peace Tower from the House of Commons into

orbit like a rocket. I don't remember it too

much. I only ever really saw it the one time

in doing my research, but I remember everything.

The original is basically kids getting put together

on this assembly line, like I said earlier, and

they're pouring out of a water cap in a bus and

taken to the TV studio, and they run over Les

Lye in one of the many, many roles the man played

on the show. You know then like the stamp and

the crack and there you go, but it's It's just

yeah, you just it's one of those things that

sticks with you because it was so completely

original And it was a cool version of the William

Tell Overture. Yeah, I didn't even really realize

that until you mentioned it's like That's great

because you know it has Like I remember the William

Tell Overture. It's just I've never heard you

know, and I know that song It's just I never

put you know two and two Like that, and the opening

was great. I mean, the original was, because

it started in Canada, and the original, like

I said, the House of Commons, which is not unlike

the, what do you call it, the Senate building,

the big building in the States. I don't know

what you call that. The Capitol building or the

Pentagon, both. Yeah, it's kind of like the Capitol

building, and one part opens up and these balloons

come out and have Pierre Trudeau, who's the leader

of ... I think it was the Liberal Party at the

time, I'm not sure. I know nothing about my country's

politics. But no, it was just, like you said,

this Monty Python -esque sort of opening. And

then it transitioned into, for a while the show

shifted from you can't do that on television

to whatever turns you on, which I've never seen.

And then it went back to the classic, you can't

do this. And then it's just stuck like that through

most of its 11 year run. Yeah, basically it started

as You Can't Do That on television in 1979 in

just a Canada broadcast basically in Ottawa.

And then that's when it was an hour long. It

was a much larger cast. Les Lye was there, but

he was the only adult. The idea was successful,

but I don't really know what exactly happened.

I mean, it was a successful first season, but

then the Whatever Turns You On kind of changed

the format, shortened it to a half hour. Ruth

Buzzi came in. I do know her. It shrunk the cast

down a little bit, but it was placed on a 7 p

.m. time slot on Tuesday nights and apparently

had poor ratings. So apparently, whatever they

did there between that first season and this

Whatever Turns You On version, did not work because

the show was canceled after one season. And then

it was then when Nickelodeon got a hold of it

and the rest is history. Yeah, they retooled

it, took away the disco music, thank God, and

went from there. Yeah. Another thing like we

kind of talked about before was there was some

stuff that you probably wouldn't be able to get

away with now. Well, there was some stuff that

apparently you couldn't even get away with back

then. They had quite a number of controversial

episodes. One in particular, which was called

Adoption, was so controversial that it was actually

banned after being shown twice. They put a big,

bold Do Not Air sticker on the master tape. Apparently

that was the only one that was banned in the

U .S. And it was the second one banned in Canada.

There was also an episode called Divorce that

was banned in Canada. Because basically every

episode had a theme. Yeah. Smells, adoption,

divorce, this or that. And apparently a couple

of these proved a little bit too, could not quite

get past the censors once people saw them. There

was one called Cosmetics. There was one called

something about drugs. Addictions is what it

was. That was not dropped, but the cosmetics

one was. I don't know, there was a little bit

of controversy here and there. I'd have to look

up those episodes to see exactly what happened,

but I'm guessing it was just touching onto so

much of a sensitive subject. Oh, yeah. Whereas,

you know, smoking and drugs is just so passe.

Yeah. I didn't know that they had banned episodes

and for a kids show especially in the 80s like

that like they must have been They must have

probably put hitting that right on the head to

get them banned like that, right? I'd have to

look I got to look some of these up to see exactly

what happened in them if you can even find them

I don't know but I do find it interesting that

there were some banned episodes from these kids

shows and that just proves that this was really

pushing the envelope and trying to do things

that Hadn't been done before Oh yeah. And then

after it's run on Nickelodeon, which basically

lasts until 89 or 90, kind of the end of the

era was that 1989 -90 season, where it no longer

was the ratings guru that it had been earlier.

It dropped to fifth as far as ratings just on

Nickelodeon. And basically the network at that

time was producing more of its shows in its new

studios at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida.

So the combination of moving stuff to Florida

and the poor ratings basically led to the cancellation

of You Can't Do That on Television, which ended

officially in 1990. But it did continue to air

reruns until about 1994. Oh yeah. I remember

up until I was in high school, it was on Saturdays,

Saturday mornings for sure, on YTV, which is

basically Nickelodeon in Canada. Saturday like

during the weekday afternoons or early evenings

on white TV as well But yeah, it was it was a

staple of a lot of Canadians TV diets such as

it was Right, you know for the longest time and

how could you not? You know love the show any

show that lasts over ten seasons has done something,

right? Oh, yeah And then that there was a reunion

in July 2004 a reunion special called Product

131 was produced at CJOHTV starring five members

of the original cast. That was Brody Osum, Marjorie

Silkov, Vanessa Lindorz, and Justin Cammie, and

Alistair Gillis made cameos. There's been a couple

reunion type conventions that have been had.

SlimeCon, I believe, is the name of it. And I

believe they've had two of them, where they've

gotten almost the entire cast. I know there's

YouTube videos of some of this, SlimeCon, where

Alistair Gillis and Katherine Moose is on there,

Wes Lye is there. So it had to be a few years

back, obviously. But apparently they did have

a couple conventions where they tried to reunite

most of the cast of You Can't Do That on Television,

or at least those that had been on the longest.

So that's kind of the history of you can't do

that on television Do you have anything to say

on anything about that before we get into some

of the recurring skits? No, I'm pretty much like

I knew it ended but I didn't know the specifics

like that. So yeah Here's the fun part. Here's

the good part of the good the bad and the ugly

here and that is the recurring skits segments

gags trademarks of the show because this is really

what made the show so memorable First of all

right from the beginning they would do a Trademark

quote -unquote preempted shows gag. Oh yeah,

I know I'm watching I saw this twice they had

Watching episodes which you know get into it

later where I saw the episode but they had one

like You know Knight Rider once a Ferrari will

not be seen tonight to bring you this crap My

favorite was probably Hulk Hogan versus Punky

Brewster, mismatch of the century. Will not be

here this evening. I was like, okay. See, you

don't do stuff like this. Not necessarily because

someone complains, because I think a lot of humor

like that would just go, you know, today's ADD

adult generation would just go, you know, over

the head. Basically, what we're talking about

here is beginning in the 80s here, a title card

would appear at the very beginning of every show

which would feature a parody title of another

TV show with some type of silly picture and then

it would always go with the line, whatever the

parody was will not be seen today in order for

us to bring you this blank production, depending

on the topic of the episode they would put in

different adjectives there. And the preempted

shows were always, you know, some type of parody

of a current TV show or a current movie or some

type of pop culture icon. Some of the other ones,

the A -Team makes one cup of coffee last five

hours will not be seen today. Let's see, Top

Gun gets put on latrine cleaning duty. Boy George

without makeup will not be seen today. There

was just some great little humor bits that were

very well thought up and very funny for those

people that would get them. I guess Saturday

Night Live did similar things. I guess You Can't

Do That on Television has preempted itself on

three occasions. And then there was another one

where instead they had a disclaimer that read,

the following program contains certain scenes

which may not be suitable for mature audiences.

Audience's juvenile discretion is advised. So

just kind of a flip of the standard thing. And

apparently there was one episode where there

was no preempt because they just didn't come

up with one or something, I don't know for it.

But I just loved, that's just a great way to

start the show was just having this such and

such will not be seen and they did it perfectly.

Oh yeah, I know. Kind of vaguely recall that

from a kid, from my own memories. It's just,

yeah, it's signature pieces like that that stay

with you for whatever reason. Maybe just, why

can't we have something good like this? Why?

Why, God? God! Another recurring thing that we

had just about every episode was something called

the opposite segment. Yeah, no that that was

probably for for like a cast centric thing that

was probably like they would Sorry brain fart

it's basically is for as Much as there were individual

skits with different characters this the opposites

and you'll get into the locker sketch Was basically

I think their signature piece. Yeah And basically

what would happen is, like we said, every show

would have a theme. I remember watching one where

the theme was smells. And the whole show is about

farting and bathroom smells and skunk smells

and horrible smells. And basically what this

opposite segment was, which would happen basically

in every episode, is all of a sudden everything

would flip. They do a little transition visual.

someone would say or in unison they would say

oh this must be the introduction to the opposite

and also everything was opposite so everything

that was supposed to smell bad would smell good

like they'd be in the bathroom after less lies

character just taking a deuce or left a deuce

and they'd all be like oh this smells so good

and whatnot and yeah or they have the one with

uh... the campers you know like Well, kids, I'm

done setting up food that will attract all our

natural predators, skunks, bears, wolves, and

guys like tossing burger patties and fish all

around. Well, we're almost done smearing ourselves

with honey, sir. Basically, the opposite is complete

inverse of logic. Or the kids would actually

like the Brussels sprouts and liver that their

mom was fixing them or something like that. Sorry.

No, it was just kind of funny because it was

the reactions that you wouldn't expect, plus

going against everything that had happened in

the episode. And my favorite part was then when

it would flip out of the opposites mid -sketch.

So like in the smells one, they would be in whatever,

let's say they were in the bathroom, they're

enjoying the smell or whatever and saying, oh,

it smells so good or whatever. And then all of

a sudden the opposite segment would end and then

they'd all pass out. It's like, you know that

the sketch is over, kids. Oh, thank God. Yeah,

or sometimes that was actually the after gag

of the opposites. This is the next scene which

is done in this generic set. They would keep

going with the gag and they're like, no, no,

no. The opposites is over. Yeah. And this was

something that actually dates all the way back

to its very first season in 79. So this is a

sketch or whatever that has been part of the

entire show's run. And it was just fun watching.

It was just an added element that kind of made

the whole episode fun because it broke up the,

not necessarily monotony, but it broke up the

part of the episode that was the same. If we're

dealing with bad smells the entire episode, all

of a sudden this gets thrown in there and it

breaks it up a little bit and switches things

up for a little bit and gives you that breather

before you go back to bad smells. But I liked

the opposite segment. Not as much as I liked

the next segment though. And that is the firing

squad. All right, so before we get into it, I'll

just give you the gist of it for those of you

that don't remember it or maybe never watched

the show. Every episode would have one of these,

if not more. And Les Lye would play this, you

know, Latin American Fidel Castro military officer

with a sword in hand, and he would be preparing

to order a firing squad to execute one of the

children actors. Al Starr, for example, who would

be standing in front of a post. Basically, the

skit was the kids would be trying to find a way

out of getting shot. Every scene would have the

same basic format. Lesly's captain character

would say, ready, aim, and then the cast member

would say, wait a minute, stop the execution,

or they would try to distract him at some point,

and he would reply with, what is it this time?

Something like that. Obviously, I can't do a

Lesly voice. But as they are trying to get out

of the execution, at some point they would get

him to stand in front of the post and get him

to accidentally say the word fire. And then the

firing squad would basically shoot him and he

would fall over. Yeah. That's kind of like, again,

it's a skit from the House of Fright and Sling

where they would randomly have a guy in a gorilla

suit walk out of the forest and he'd be looking

around and keep going about his bit. Every time

he gets knocked in the head by a golf ball and

just ... But yeah, this was like the great, again,

another signature piece of the show. What is

it this time? And it's like, I got a doctor's

is a very original way of getting out of an execution.

Yeah. Well, unlike the one with the smells, the

kid kept farting or whatever and apparently set

the post on fire. So then he moves out of the

way and Lesly looks at it. said something about

fire and of course they shouldn't. The fun part

was you knew what was going to happen. You knew

that he was going to do the ready aim. What is

it this time? You knew eventually he was going

to get shot. The fun part was waiting to see

how the kid tricked him this time. Yeah. And

that just goes to the ingenuity of the writers

that did this over 11 years and almost every

episode. They just kept coming up with ways.

Like, how truly stupid was this dictator guy

that he falls for it every time? Well, this is

another thing why this show can't happen anymore

because it actually had good writing. And people

today don't have time to actually get good writers

that write good stuff over and over and over

again. I mean, people always want to take the

lazy way out and just do the same formulaic thing

over and over and over again. This was the same

formulaic thing but with different writing every

single time. Yeah, it's like it was funny. Yeah,

and this is easily one of my favorite skits.

I just loved it. I loved it First of all, I love

the fact that it's some type of dictator who's

got a firing squad getting ready to kill a kid

Yeah Yeah, it's just that that poop insane It's

like what is going on here? You could only get

rid get get away with that eighties Yeah, it's

like you wanted that to happen at your school

where the principal took out a certain kid and

just gave him the firing squad. Exactly. If you

tried shooting that nowadays, some busybody would

march onto the set and interrupt the whole thing.

Just get the hell out of here. Exactly. Probably

the most iconic skit from You Can't Do That on

Television and the one that most people remember

probably easiest is the locker room skit. And

basically what you have here is you have like

six to eight or ten individual lockers, each

with different colors. And then the words, you

can't do that on television, I think are painted

across them. And they would be just kind of sitting

alone, and a kid would pop out of one of the

lockers, call to one of the other kids who would

pop out of a different locker, and they would

just tell jokes or one -liners back and forth.

And then they'd close the door, and then another

kid would open it. And it was like, the jokes

are terrible. It was just something cool about

the kids popping out of the locker, I think.

Yeah. No, it's like, you know, for, you know,

Alistair would pop out and call Christine. He

would go back in. Christine would call like Marjorie.

Yeah. You know, it just, they would all kind

of go back and forth like that for a couple of

minutes. And yeah, it was, again, it was, well,

not lame, but you know, it's. They weren't necessarily

the best jokes, but they're like those growners,

you know those well the stuff that you'd hear

it from people at school It's like stuff you

could imagine your classmates coming up with

Exactly, and a lot of it gave it also because

we didn't really talk about this But throughout

the entire episode all the time the kids are

always making fun of each other. Oh, yeah And

each other but it's all good nature fun Yeah,

but I mean this is something you can relate to

because you know They pop out the locker and

make some type of joke about moose and that she

smells or that she's doing whatever stupid or

something like that. It's just fun stuff. She's

got cooties. What's that? She's got cooties or

something. Yeah, and it was just funny jokes

where they'd pick on each other. If one of them

was short, they'd pick on him being short. I

know it sounds mean or whatever, and oh, no,

we couldn't do this today because we've got to

have everybody have self -esteem and we can't

pick on people. But when you're doing it like

this, completely tongue in cheek, it made it

funny. Oh, yeah. You know for those that didn't

know that trivia thing like I only ever saw Like

maybe three or four episodes growing up, but

Rowan and Martin's laughing Originated this whole

sketch thing. Yeah Where they had like this big,

you know wall with like different in the the

wall that Rowan Martin uses more Captain Kangaroo

That was like literally all over the place It

wasn't just these lockers. But yeah, it's just

it's the idea that you can take some a joke the

joke wall idea. And they just played it up and

it was fun. I always wanted to be in one of the

lockers. That would never be a good... I always

just wanted to pop out of the locker. I don't

know. And this was also something that originated

in its very first season. So, some of these things

are stuff that they stayed true to the entire

run and they were so successful that they didn't

need to come up with new things or replacement

things. They got something right from the beginning

and they did it throughout the entire run of

the show successfully. Obviously, the locker

has changed a little bit throughout the years,

but the basic skit was always the same. You never

knew who was going to be in the locker or who

was going to be popping out, so that was kind

of fun. Exactly. Another thing similar to what

they did at the beginning of the show with the

preempted fake show titles is they would also

change the production company at the end of the

show every time and I forgot about this until

doing research but it would basically have the

closing credits and it would be followed by an

announcement of the company that produced the

program which would say you can't do that on

television is a blank production but they would

change that based on the topic of the show so

example for the bullying episode it would say

you can't do that on television is a black eye

production or you know the divorce show you can't

do that on television is a split down the middle

production and so they would change the title

every single time and then usually it would be

followed by one final sketch from the kids which

usually took place on the main set which we haven't

really talked about either I don't know how to

describe the main set It looked like the inside

of a geodesic dome. Yes. That is a perfect way

to describe it. Thank you, JT. And basically

what that was is the kids would just be sitting

on set. They would show Ross the stagehand. You'd

have cameras and stuff, and it was like they

were actually filming stuff there. It was just

kind of their home base, so to speak. And that's

usually where the last skit would take place

after this little production note. I didn't actually,

I don't think I ever actually noticed that gag

before. I didn't until I, but now that they say

that I realize, yes, they did do that. Yeah,

yeah, exactly. I think as kids sometimes you

just kind of tune out that part because you're

used to the same old, you know. Well, it's the

end of the show, I mean. Yeah, and you're used

to this nothing being exciting in the credits.

Yeah. No, I didn't know that, but... Again, that

just goes back to how they did the joke wall,

the execution. They did this every episode, but

they made it work. They're one of the very, very

rare shows that they found this formula with

almost the first get -go, and they just went

with it. Um and there's just so many things that

they hit right on I mean usually a show might

have one or two little trademark things that

you remember but this has like a dozen it seems

like and Along with the locker segment, which

is probably the one I think most people remember

the other one That's probably most the show is

most famous for as far as its impact on future

Nickelodeon shows And I don't think many people

realize this this is where slime was born. Oh

Yeah, I mean and before sliding they had the

water skin where someone would say wet or I'm

thirsty or something like that. Usually if they

said the word water they would get doused with

water and at the beginning it was someone throwing

a pail of water at them and then eventually it

would come from the ceiling the same way that

the slime and the slime and water both are excellent

skits but I just don't think most people realize

that the green slime Nickelodeon's trademark

green slime began with you can't do that on television.

It started in Canada. And the water would come

down whenever anybody said water. At one point,

you could say wet or something like that, too,

but eventually it was just water. And slime would

come down if you ever said, I don't know. If

you ever said, if someone ever asked you a question,

and they would always try to get to you, they

would try to ask you a question that you couldn't

possibly know the answer. If you said, I don't

know, the green slime would come down on you.

And just the water and the slime coming down

was just great. Yeah, because then you look like

they say, I love how sometimes the setup is the

I don't think that's the right answer. They would

play with it and then someone would finally say

I don't know. They get doused and whether it

was water or it was slime, as soon as it hit

they get that funny little smile on their face

because they're fighting to stay in character

for that scene to finish the gag. But at the

same time the smile also says I can't believe

I'm getting paid for this. Exactly. And the slime

did at times have different colors. Usually it

was green, but for a few episodes they would

change it up and have it white or red or brown

or, you know, multicolored or whatever, but it

was usually the standard green. And I didn't

know this, but they actually put down usually

some type of tarp to protect the set when this

was going to happen. So I guess if you're watching

real carefully every once in a while, you can

see it and you can definitely hear it. Because

when the slime hits the tarp it makes a different

sound than if it would have hit like a regular

floor And I guess I never caught this but apparently

sometimes the actors that we're gonna get Watered

or slimed would actually be barefoot during that

scene Yes, and if you just Who really wants to

be stepping at that? Well, yeah, but I guess

I never even saw it. I guess there was ways to

be able to predict who was going to get slimed

or who was going to get water poured on them

based on what they were wearing and where they

were standing and stuff like that. But it was

just cool. And this is something that has happened

now forever because I like the Nick Lodi and

the Kids' Choice Awards. That's a staple of that

award show is somebody getting slimed. Yeah,

usually the host. Yeah, and that started, I believe,

with Les Lye being on one of the very first Nickelodeon

Kids' Choice Awards and getting, I don't know,

if he got slimed or if Tony Danza got slimed,

and then from there it just kind of went on.

But, I mean, what would Nickelodeon be without

slime? There wouldn't be nothing. And apparently,

for those of you that are interested, the slime

consisted of a mixture of lime green gelatin

powder and flour. Uh, eventually oatmeal was

added to the recipe as was baby shampoo so that

I would wash out of the actor's hair more easily.

And that's why a lot of times you would see the

cast members as they're getting slimed look up,

um, because they were trying to make it hit their

face more than their hair. Uh, I don't think

it's really mattered. No, it didn't, but that

is just, I don't know. That's. Awesome and obviously

as the years went through with Nickelodeon you

would get slime on Double Dare and you would

get Gack and Goose being sold in stores and You

know Orlando has a green slime geyser But it

all started back you can't do that on television

It started in Canada can't say that enough and

most of the time it would happen on the main

set But I also liked it when they would do it

on a completely different set Yeah, in the middle,

one of their gangs. Yeah, I remember one time,

one of the kids being like... Because oftentimes,

and we've got to go through some of the segments

here that I don't necessarily have listed, but

one of these segments would be the home scene

where you would either have the kids at the dinner

table with the two adults, or you would have

them in a living room sitting on a chair, couch,

watching TV, or you would have... the bedroom

which was usually the two boys in separate beds

but in the same room. And I remember one of them

getting water poured on them while they were

in the bed. Oh yeah, where the little brother

is like praying and then God, you know, Les Light

does like this narration of God and he's like,

so do you want me to get rid of them or do you

just want me to make them stop smelling? The

kid's like, make them stop smelling. He gets

the water. No, I mean, yeah as far as other skits

like they had the the doctor Was like one that

recurred a lot. Oh, I remember that now where

Leslie would play this kind of Groucho Marx style

doctor. It was not something that you would want

your kids to see if they already were afraid

to go to the doctor. Yeah Sorry, no, go ahead.

Oh, it's just like the other guys sitting there

Like I said, there's very new Groucho Marx, you

know mustache eyebrows smoking on a cigar kids

behind the screen. Doctor, I think I'm old enough

now that I can see a different doctor. It's like,

well, the guy's a baby doctor, so the kid comes

out, and that just kind of showed the willingness

to do things, like the balls. It's like a 13,

14 -year -old boy dressed in a diaper sucking

on a giant soother. You can't do that nowadays.

Or it would be something where like it was like

something like a cold or he was stuffy or something

like that and then Leslai would come out with

like a drill or with like a You know something

crazy that would never be used to fix this ailment

and smells episode we cut like the one girl's

nose off Yeah, I mean it was just like the doctor

out of hell Like I said mentioned there was Barth

Barth, I love the Barth scenes because First

of all, it was disgusting. I mean, they would

have like socks in their burgers or they would

have, you know, something disgusting in the burger.

But it was just always funny when they would

start puking over the chair rail or the rail

there. And that was something about like every

skit, you kind of knew what was eventually going

to happen. Like in the execution skit, you knew

the captain was going to get shot. Exactly. In

certain skits, you know someone's going to get

slimed or something like that. This one, that

one you knew someone was going to throw up at

some point, but it's like waiting for how it's

going to happen and waiting to see how they get

to that point that was the fun part of watching

it. If four of them are sitting at Bar's diner

there at the table, which one of them is going

to be the one that pukes first? Yeah, and then

peristaltic chain reaction. Right. And then they

had that torture scene, which is another one

that was in a lot of episodes where one of the

kid cast is chained up in this dungeon, and then

Les Light comes in as this vaguely Germanic torturer.

Basically, he starts talking smack about the

skeleton that's chained on the wall, or the kid

comes in. Like you said, there's the little blonde

boy who's playing an arcade game. He's like,

why am I chained to the wall, and why is he playing

the arcade? Well, if he doesn't make 8 million

points, he's getting doused in hot oil. Stuff

like that. There's also the detention one where

a kid would be stuck in detention for hours with

Leslye as the teacher slash principal. I don't

know which one he was supposed to be, but that

was pretty funny and them trying to either get

out of detention or what they had to do while

they were in there. I just thought that was kind

of a cool scene. Like I said, the house scenes

were cool. Occasionally there was also scenes

at an actual school, I believe, like with desks

and stuff. Yeah, they had the teacher sketch

and then they had the detention sketch. Then

they had the ones where they would go to the

front door of the house where the female adult

would be living or sometimes Les Lye would be

living, where they would be trying to sell something

or go door to door with some type of fundraiser.

Or they're just picking up one of the girls for

a date. Yeah, and they'd ring the doorbell and

one of the adult characters would answer and

hilarity would ensue. I'm trying to think if

there's any other skits that we're missing that

were kind of ongoing. I think that was most of

them. Ross with the stagehand on the main set

giving directions and trying to get people to

read the cue cards. You should mention that Ross

got slimed and got the water quite a bit. As

far as regular carriers, I think him and Moose

like Christine, they're amongst the regulars.

They're the ones that got it, I think, the most.

Yeah, so so basically if we missed any cool segments

that you guys remember make a comment on our

post on the webpage geekcastradio .com and find

the telecast tab and let us know if we missed

any any cool Recurring scenes or segments skits

that that you liked so we can remember them,

too So I think that does it unless you have anything

else on the good the bad and the ugly We should

mention the pies. Oh, yeah, there was also pies

which is and I actually did watch that episode

on YouTube where You know, they compare the stupidity

of hitting oneself in the face with pies over

and over again is akin to taking drugs. And I

was like, wow, that's brilliant. Yeah. And they

were basically getting high off the pies. Well,

yeah. Or they're just like, man, I got to get

a custard in the face, man. I got to get a custard

in the face. And it was intelligent in the fact

that they were making fun of it. But at the same

time, they're And it's something that kids would

process. Well, if drugs is as stupid as hitting

yourself in the face with a pie, it wasn't heavy

-handed. Right, it wasn't preachy. Yeah, it wasn't

preaching to their audience. It wasn't talking

down to them, but it was talking to them. It

was like, guys, this ain't cool. Yeah, exactly.

It was just more good writing. Exactly. All right,

so I think we will move on to... Things that

make you go hmm That's right. It's time for things

you might not know about you can't do that on

television First thing that you might not know

is that less lie is the only cast member who

appeared in every single episode It shouldn't

be a huge surprise, but a little interesting

trivia tidbit Second thing you might not know

the kids on the show got paid extra For episodes

in which in which they were doused with water

orbs or slime They got $75 extra an episode for

the water and a hundred fifty dollars extra an

episode for slime Just kind of makes you wonder

whether they're like, oh, can I get it? I know

I would have been like bring on the slime This

is the third thing that I absolutely did not

know about this show and I find it fascinating

in all of Abby Haggard's roles Who is the you

know, the mother of the librarian and we forgot

about the librarian? Etc. She wears gloves in

all of her roles Yeah, the mother wears yellow

latex gloves the librarian words white cotton

gloves Apparently the the producers thought her

hands were too elegant looking for a hard -working

housewife So she wears gloves in every single

role that she plays Wow, I did not know that

yeah fourth thing that you might not know about

the Show was only three full episodes from the

first season are known to exist Apparently the

studio masters no longer exist But the episodes

apparently, some websites have those three episodes

or possible shows where kids videotape them.

That's the only way that this could possibly

exist is if you recorded them at home. So not

many episodes from that first season are known

to exist. And the last thing that you might not

know is you can't do that on television. It became

Nickelodeon's highest rated television program

in 1984 and will remain the highest rated television

program on the channel for two years, at least

until 1986. I can see it. So it was a... Because

I read that one thing, only three full episodes

from the... I kind of glossed over the first

season. Only three full episodes of the show

are known to exist. Wow, they didn't care at

all No, just that first season but I'm sure kids

out there somewhere saved them because that always

surprised me how kids Somehow recorded their

favorite shows back in the day and still have

the like the VHS tapes Yeah, I mean that just

kind of goes to show you that you think in today's

age of like you 500 plus channels and nothing

on Yeah, how they must have loved the show back

in the day when they only had like four channels.

Yeah, exactly I'm getting into a little bit about

where they are now, like I said, and we're not

going to talk about everybody because there was

over 100 people on the show, but the main people,

starting with Les Lye. He continued to live with

his family and friends in Ottawa, Ontario after

the show. He attended both SlimeCon 2002 and

SlimeCon 2004 in Ottawa. Unfortunately, though,

he did pass away two years ago in 2009, and he

was 84 years old at the time. I didn't know that.

So he is no longer with us. I did not know he

was that old though either, but I guess that

makes it in the 80s Yeah, he was in his 50s.

I guess when he was doing that show That surprised

me he looks younger But uh and Abby the Abby

Haggard the mom She's still like I said, I just

talked to her the other day. So she's still kicking.

Um She's written and produced six award -winning

plays She also created a live youth talent show

series that toured agricultural fairs across

Ontario. And she, I guess, regularly books cabaret

performances for four different shows. So she's

still very much doing stuff, mainly in Canada,

I guess in the Ontario, Ottawa area. Christine

McGlade Moose. One of the first cast members

anyone thinks of when remembering you can't do

that on television. She was the longest running

host of the program. She is currently a mother

and works as a producer and director for TV Ontario.

She also appeared at both SlimeCon 2002 and SlimeCon

2004. Alistair Gillis. He is apparently back

in school attending school or something, but

he's also done a few things here and there He

was at the slime con 2002 and 2004 there is a

website If you look up you can't do that on television

on Google There is a website that has tabs on

most of the cast So if you really want to you

know see where an individual person is now I'd

go to that website, and we will put the link

in at our page on on the post So you can get

to that link and you can look up your individual

people and see what they're doing now if you

would like. But most of them were just kids when

they were doing this and most of them are grown

adults at this point and not many of them I don't

think are still doing the entertainment business,

maybe outside of Alanis Morissette. There's a

couple people that have been doing some voice

work, Justin Cammie and one or two others, but

it's kind of a mixed bag with this group. Not

a lot of them, you know, went on to be humongous

stars, so to speak. And this might have been

also their only march stab at it, so. Yeah. So,

that is where a few of them are, and we're going

to take a quick break for some commercials and

some GeekCast content and some sound clips from

You Can't Do That on television, so enjoy the

commercial break and we'll be right back. Count

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on over to geetcastradio .com and click on the

telecast tab at the top of the page. Once there

you can find our complete Season 1 schedule with

all 35 episodes. Please look this over, because

we would hate for you to cast your vote for a

show that is already on our schedule. Once you've

done this, just scroll to the section titled

Listener's Choice and click on the comments button.

All that's left for you to do now is to cast

your vote through a comment. For example, you

might say, Hey, I see that Nick Arcade is not

in your Season 1 lineup, so I'd like to cast

a vote for Nick Arcade to be the Listener's Choice

episode. It's that simple, so please go cast

your vote for your favorite show and stay tuned

for Episode 34 to see which show becomes our

very first Listener's Choice. That does it for

now. This has been Optimus Solo from the Telecast.

I want to be just like Joan Rivers. Joan Rivers?

Why? Well, she can insult people every day and

get away with it. Oh, moo! Forget it, Lisa. You're

not Joan Rivers yet. Oh, Dougie. Yes, Ben? What's

your ambition? My ambition is to grow up to be

tall and handsome. What? You mean like me? No.

Watch it, Doug, or you'll never live to achieve

your ambition. Uh, Ben? Yeah, okay. I wouldn't

pick an old dog like that. Why not? Has he got

a gun or something? No, he's just got a belt.

A black belt. A karate. A dog down. Down. Sorry.

Ben, don't talk that doggy like it was a dog.

Of course, he won't get very jealous. Lisa? Yes,

Missy? Lisa, was it always your ambition to be

an actress? Yes, it was. What went wrong? Yes,

Alastair? I want to be a psychiatrist. How exciting

for you. Yeah, and I'll only deal with split

personalities. Why? So I can build them twice.

Get it? Split personalities? Oh, Christian? Yeah,

Ben? What's your ambition in life? My ambition

in life is to be trapped in an elevator with

Tom Selleck. Wouldn't that be kind of dangerous?

I mean, what if the rescuers didn't hear your

cries for help? Ben? If I was trapped in an elevator

with Tom Selleck, I would not be crying for help.

Well, it's not your cries for help, his. Hello,

nurses, and friends and nurses. Yakko Warner

here, and you're listening to a podcast on the

Geekcast Radio Network. Lucky you. Hey everybody,

it's Optimus Solo from Geekcast Radio Network's

new show, The Telecast, with some important information

on our theme song contest. The rules for this

contest are pretty simple. In Season 1 of The

Telecast, we will be covering 33 classic hit

shows from the 80s and 90s. Obviously, all of

these shows had theme songs, which sometimes

can be the most memorable part of a show. This

contest is going to test your memory on those

theme songs. How is that you may ask? Well, because

we have taken 32 of those classic theme songs

and smashed them into one three -minute clip.

Your job is to identify the order in which these

32 shows appear in that three -minute clip. Also,

you must be able to identify which one of the

33 shows was left out of the clip. Some of the

shows should be fairly easy for you to identify

while others may be a bit trickier. For a list

of all the shows in season 1 and more information

on the contest, visit the telecast page at geekcastradio

.com. Also remember to tune in to every episode

of the telecast because each episode will contain

that show's theme song in its entirety at the

beginning of the show as well as the 3 minute

contest song towards the end of the show. This

has been Optimus Solo from the telecast saying

good luck and happy listening. Ready... and...

Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute, stop the execution.

What? Oh, no, no. Why not? Because I want to

keep my job is why. It's nothing personal, but

the Generalissimo is very upset about the way

I keep messing up these executions. Well, you

don't mess them up. They usually turn out pretty

good. No, no, no, no. I'm not the one who's supposed

to get shot. You're the one who's supposed to

get shot. I'll tell you something else. The Generalissimo

has told me if I mess up once more... One more

execution, I get fired! Hey guys, Raphael here

at the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Did you

say podcast? Dudes, dudettes, you're listening

to a podcast on the Gatecast Radio Network. Cowabunga!

This week on You Can't Do That on Television,

Moose and the gang look at medicine. Rules and

regulation. and the world of the future. Watch

You Can't Do That on television. Monday, Wednesday,

and Friday at 3 .30 Eastern, 12 .30 Pacific.

And again at 7 Eastern, 4 Pacific. You Can't

Do That on television. Only on Nickelodeon. Now

back to You Can't Do That on television. Alright,

thanks for staying with us everyone and you may

be wondering how you can watch some you can't

do that on television now Yeah As great as this

show is and you know as long as it lasted and

as high of a rating show And you know for all

the things it did for Nickelodeon this show is

getting no justice No love as far as no love

as far as how you can watch it now and it's probably

because it's hard to get Clearance to put all

of this stuff on DVD It's not available on DVD,

it's not available on Netflix, it's not available

on iTunes. What the hell? There was rumors that

it was going to be on DVD, then it got pulled

back off of the schedule. But maybe it was Shout

Factory doing Hey Dude and a couple of the other

Nickelodeon things. Maybe they'll do this, but

I think part of it is the content that's holding

them back. Oh yeah. not so easily to clear all

the different hurdles they have to in order to

get this on some type of watchable format. So,

unfortunately, we're stuck with just YouTube.

Not that that's a bad thing. No, it's not terrible

because the content on YouTube is pretty clear.

For the most part, yeah. I mean, there are some,

you get a mixed bag, you get a little of everything,

but you can usually find some clear stuff. You

can find some complete episodes in like two or

three parts. You can find some skits just individual

skits You just kind of gotta be knowing what

you're doing on YouTube as far as searching and

being able to find The good stuff and weed out

the bad stuff What was your experience watching

some of this on YouTube or what you could find?

I actually found like I watched like six or seven

episodes. Yeah in three parts One of them I wanted

to there's one the malls episode. I couldn't

find the first part you can only find For some

reason, there's three or four different accounts

that had parts two and part three, but one had

part one. You'll probably run in, I mean, in

the myriad episodes that this show produced for

what's on YouTube, you'll probably run into that.

But yeah, no, they had a lot of good, decently

clear episodes. Yeah, I was impressed. Yeah,

it was as clear as watching it on YouTube as

when I watched it on TV back in the day. It was

basically VHS rips and it looked fine Yeah, I

agree and usually you'll find it, you know, if

you just look up you can't do that on television

You'll notice the episodes because it'll say

like you can't do that on television and then

like one word which was the theme for that episode

and it'll just say like one of three or part

one or Something like that and you'll be able

to watch it that way. You can also find some

of the slime con clips For example, you can find

the audition that Moose, her original audition

for the show. And you can find a few things like

that, as well as the actual episodes. But there

is some stuff out on YouTube, so if you want

to get a taste of what you can't do that on television,

you can find every single one of the skits that

we've talked about is on YouTube in some way,

shape, or form. So, I mean, if you want to find

an execution theme, you know, skit to remember

what that was like, it's on YouTube. The bar

scenes are on YouTube. I mean, you can find a

little bit of everything. You just have to do

a little bit of looking sometimes. So, time to

give our ratings. The IGN replacement crew, one

through four. One, which is you didn't like the

show back then and you don't really like it now.

Two is you loved it back then, but now it's terrible.

Three, you loved it and you'd still watch it

on TV. Four, you want this thing on DVD. I'm

going to give it a three. I still love the show.

And in the course of doing research, I kind of

remembered why I love the show. So I would give

it a three. I'm actually going to do something

I don't usually do, and I'm going to give this

one a four. I would actually buy this if it was

on DVD. Well played. If it was available on DVD,

I would buy it. So far, it's not. I don't know

how much of it I would buy. It depends on how

they put it out on DVD. But this is just something

that I would be like, yep, I am not ashamed to

own this one and put it right on the shelf with

the rest of them. But yeah, three or four is

good. I'm going to give it a four, though. This

show was so good and unique back then. And even

though the acting is not necessarily the greatest

thing to watch and some of the jokes aren't necessarily

funny, those skits are just so memorable and

the writing is really good. Oh yeah. And for

that, I would love to watch a series of episodes

of this on DVD quality. Oh yeah. So, I know a

lot of people don't like it because they missed

it, they missed the boat or they weren't watching

Nickelodeon until Double Dare and Clarissa and

all that and they missed some of that good early

Nickelodeon. But to me, Nickelodeon was never

as good as it was in those first few years. Oh

yes. It's kind of like chasing the dragon. You

hit the ball in the park once and you just never

seem to be able to do that again. Yeah. I mean,

somewhere in the 90s Nickelodeon lost, you know,

it jumped ship or whatever and turned into just

another channel instead of being the groundbreaking

push the envelope channel. And I got to appreciate

the first 10 years of Nickelodeon a little bit

better than what has become of it since. So I

would like to thank JT for being with me today

on this first of the off -the -wall topics that

we're going to talk about. And of course, I'd

like to thank you, the listener, for joining

us here on the telecast. If you want to leave

us feedback on the show, go to GeekCastRadio

.com. It's all new. It's revamped. Steve's done

a great job with it. So go to GeekCastRadio .com.

Click on the telecast tab and you can find all

of our episodes. You can make comments on whichever

episodes you'd like. You can also rate our show

and leave us feedback in iTunes. We did have

a new feedback left on iTunes and it was left...

Just a little bit ago, it's the August 29th by

Lizer345, a five -star review and it says simply,

five words, great, great podcast, just amazing.

So we are up to 16 ratings on the US side of

things and we are still maintaining our five

-star quality. So thank you all and please leave

more comments, feedback, what you want to see,

what you like, what you don't like so we can

make improvements. We're always trying to get

better. If you want your comments to be part

of the future show, you can call the voicemail

on 502 -526 -5821. And of course you can always

become a fan of us on Facebook, Facebook .com

slash GeekCastRadioNetwork and Mike will keep

you up to date with all of our new content and

what's going on there. Don't forget about our

theme song contest and our listeners' choice

episode voting. Time's running out for those

two things. So if you're not aware of what I'm

talking about, you can find the post on GeekCastRadio

.com. So that does it for now. We hope we succeeded

in entertaining you, informing you, and most

importantly, unleashing the geek in you on this

episode of the Tele... cast and we hope that

you will tune in for our next episode when we

will begin another off -the -wall topic which

is land of the lost not the Will Ferrell movie

we're talking 1970s Croft land of the lost I

know most of you are scratching your heads right

now for now I am your host optimist solo with

JT from Saskatoon. Hoping that you will tune

in in 10 days for another episode of the Telecast.

Bye! Discover this! You got any last requests?

Oh, yeah, I do. Before I go, do you think you'll

let me see a third part of the Star Wars movies?

I mean, I missed it, and I have to find out what

happened to Han Solo. You're a Star Wars fan,

so am I, like, 12 times, and the amigos love

the comic books. Hey, hey, hey! So then, you'll

let me go? No way, kid. Anyone who didn't see

Return of the Jedi and calls himself a Star Wars

fan deserves to be shot. Ready? Hey! You think

he made it up because he doesn't like you and

wants to hurt your reputation? Stephanie, because

I put in four rats and six cockroaches in each

one of my Vythe burgers. Quality sometimes costs.

Isn't it? That's it. This is grade A sirloin

of rat, you know. Nothing's too good for my kids.

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