Masters of the Universe Review

and the masters of the universe! I am Adam, Prince

of Eternia, defender of the secrets of Castle

Grayskull. This is Granger, my fearless friend.

Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the

day I held aloft my magic sword and said, By

the power of Grayskull! I became the mighty battle

cat, and I became G -Man, the most powerful man

in the universe! Only three others share this

secret. Our friends, the sorcerers, the nidans,

and our girls. Together we defend Castle Grayskull

from the evil masters of the universe! At the

far end of the universe, there is a planet ruled

by a being of utter evil. And there is only one

man who dares challenge him. They are locked

in a battle to the death. A battle that will

take them across the heavens. A battle that will

finally be fought. Across the face. Police! Nobody

move! Off first. I think I'm gonna need some

backup. Can you show us the way? Of course. No!

From a distant galaxy, they have come to Earth.

Dolph Lundgren as He -Man. Frank Langella as

Skeletor. Only they have the powers to be. Masters

of the universe, live the adventure. Hello and

welcome to the 40th episode of the MWIRE movie

we can review today We're going to be discussing

Masters of the universe the movie or the motion

picture or whatever the hell it's called under

the subtitle of it I'm your host if you on Mike

and I'm joined with Kevin Thompson from tooncast

and behind the voice actors calm. Hello It's

going how are you? I am pretty good. Yeah, what

are you been up to? I've actually been doing

a lot of work at my house. I've been, now that

it's somewhat nicer, I bought this power washer

thing from my aunt and uncle, which I've never

used a power washer before, and oh my god. Those

things are freaking amazing. I didn't even realize

my deck was the color that it is, but I've power

washed my whole deck and my sidewalk in the front

of my house, so I just have the back and the

sides to go, but other than that... Not a whole

lot. I haven't been on a computer a lot lately.

I've been out of town and doing this or that,

so I'm kind of out of touch with a lot of things.

I got on for a few hours yesterday and added

some stuff to BehindTheVoiceActors .com. I added

all the Alvin and the Chipmunks, the cartoon,

the Alvin Show cartoon, the Alvin and the Chipmunks

movies, and I don't know what else I did, but

not a lot. Getting ready to do some Alvin voice

compares. Yeah, you know, I'm about the same.

I haven't really been doing too much, just the

podcasting thing. Gotta upgrade the computer,

get more memory for it or whatever, that's gonna

cost an arm and a leg. Yeah. I hear ya. I did

forget, I actually made a couple purchases, actually

a couple weeks ago I bought the Clone Wars animated

movie. and I bought the He -Man, the 2002 or

2003 cartoon series. It was only like 20 bucks

for the entire series, so I bought that. I haven't

watched it yet, but I have some stuff I have

to watch here coming up whenever I get a chance.

Yeah, I want them by coming up next week on May

4th. X -Men... Volume five is coming out which

is the the fifth season of the 90s cartoon and

Iron Man the 94 Marvel cartoon the complete series

is coming out for that, but I don't think I'm

gonna be able to buy them Anybody wants to donate

them email me at tfguandmikeatgmail .com Yeah,

you know it's just been about the usual thing

still no responses from Any of the feelers I

put out for new interviews as far as voice actors

go But you know, hey, whatever So this show has

hit 40 episodes and I actually can't believe

we've hit 40 episodes already And we're going

to be kicking it off with what was originally

supposed to be episode 20 which is Masters of

the Universe which is a 1987 science fiction

film based on the toy line by the same name.

The movie stars Dolph Lundgren as He -Man and

Frank Langella as Skeletor. Other actors include

John Cipher as Man in Arms, Chelsea Field as

Tila, and Billy Barty as Gwildor, the short,

uh, the Morian inventor slash locksmith. It also

has, uh, Meg Foster as Evil Lynn, which, eh,

whatever. The film was released in the United

States on August 7th, 1987 after the popularity

of the toy line and cartoon had peaked. When

did you first see this? I saw this in theater.

I don't remember if it was a birthday party or

what it was, but I remember specifically this

is one of the first movies I can remember going

and seeing it. It wasn't the first movie I saw

in theater, but it's one of the first ones I

can remember. So, you know, I didn't go to see

a lot of movies when I was young. We didn't have

a ton of money, so. Yeah. But I do remember.

So I'm thinking this was probably one of my friend's

birthday parties where he invited a bunch of

people over and they took us out to a movie or

something. But I remember seeing it in the theater.

And then after that, I think I saw it once. I

don't know if it was on TV or VHS or something.

And then actually about a year, actually probably

more close to two years or so ago. When people

I hang out with, they get together every Sunday

night. Well, they used to. They get together

every Sunday night and they call it crappy movie

night. And usually what they would watch is they

would pick up one of those $1 Walmart movies.

The only rule was basically it had to be either

fantasy or sci -fi. And it was kind of like mystery

science theater or whatever. We would just watch

it and make fun of it and have a good time and

stay up until 3 o 'clock in the morning. One

of the weeks we watched Masters of the Universe

as our crappy movie night. So I had seen it about

two or so years ago, and then I just watched

it again today. Yeah, I hadn't been wanting it.

When I read about it, it was already on VHS.

And I didn't go to the theater to see it. I don't

know why, I just didn't. You know, I've been

looking for the DVD for a number of years now

and, uh, I don't know, earlier last year I finally

just said screw it. And I went, I think I got

it off Amazon for like six bucks. That's what

I got it off of too. Yeah, um... I have serious

issues with this film. I can tell. Serious, serious

issues. First of all... I don't get it. What

do you mean you don't get it? I usually, this

is the type of movie that I wouldn't like, but

I do it. Well, alright. They capitalized on the

toy line in the 80s cartoon. Obviously, this

came out in 87. The cartoon, I think, was already

done, yeah. He -Man and both She -Ra were done

by then. But, you know, they still wanted to

make money off of it, and I'm sure Mattel gave

the go -ahead, and I'm sure once I start getting

into the plot and the information that I have

on the script here, which I... I forgot to send

to you, oh well. I've been having computer issues

with, well my mom has been having computer issues

and yeah, I've been dealing with that and that's

kinda been a little bit stressful. Anyway, what

the hell was I, oh yeah, so you know, they wanted

to capitalize on the fame of He -Man and I just

think they fucking dropped the ball. I think

there's only maybe, I don't know. That's just...

I like the He -Man character in the film. I love

the Skeletor character. I love the fact they

got Frank Langella to do it. The effects and

the makeup on Skeletor were awesome. Uh, main

issue with Evelyn, she's not a sorceress. Well,

she isn't, she isn't. I mean, she morphs into

the mother to trick Julie, but... I mean, really,

other than that, what else does she do in this

film for sorcery? I mean, there's nothing that

she does whatsoever. I mean, Skeletor, you know,

you have him coming over to the sorceress' cage

and opening his fist and sucking the life out

of her and then closing his fist. You know, you've

got him at the end with the giant electrodes

coming out of his morphed, you know, yellow -gold

body. You know. You got him when he kills that,

kills one of his guys, kind of just sends lightning

bolts out of his... fingers or whatever. Yeah.

You know what? Honestly, I just finished watching

this before we started the record. We're recording

this Thursday night. It'll be up Saturday morning

of this week. And I am drawing so many lines

between this, Star Wars, and Spaceballs. Yeah.

When he zapped the guy that failed. The first

thing I thought of was Darth Helmet and, you

know, lowering the Schwartz and they're all covering

up their balls in space balls. The Star Wars

references, oh my god! Every single laser beam,

I guarantee you, they've used in the Star Wars

film that was used in this. Well, and actually

that would make sense. I got to preface this

with saying that because I had seen it so many

times and I remembered it, I remember what happened

in the movie, so I didn't necessarily need to

concentrate on the actual movie this time. I

watched it with the commentary on. Oh God, I

did that a while ago. I usually like watching

movies with the commentaries on because the commentaries

are usually kind of insightful and give you some

behind the scenes stuff. I will tell everybody

out there right now, never watch this movie with

the commentary on. He is, it's with the director

of the show. And he is by far the worst commentary

person I have ever heard in my life. He goes

through, and I'm getting sidetracked a little

bit, but he basically goes through the entire

movie and all he talks about over and over and

he repeats himself tons and tons. But all he

talks about is lighting and cameras and stuff

like that. And while that might be cool for people

that are into that type of stuff, That usually

means nothing for the average everyday fan. He

gave very few actual behind the scenes details

that were worth it, but one of the things I did

pick up on is he said his visual effects guy

was actually from Lucas films. So his main guy

in charge of all the visual effects, lasers,

etc. was actually straight from George Lucas

and his company, so that kind of makes sense

that we have a lot of Star Wars kind of connection.

He does mention some other things. He does try

to reference a lot of stuff. He has Lord of the

Rings references. He has a lot of Wizard of the

Oz references. Wizard of the Oz. Wizard of the

Oz. As well as obviously your Star Wars and Star

Trek. You seem like a Star Trek fan too. I swear

to God if you painted Gwildor green and shaved

the fucking beard it would be Yoda. A less competent

Yoda. He did say that Gwildor was the one character

that he got the most heat for. He said, you know,

most die -hard fans were pissed off because there

was no Orko, but he basically said that at the

time to try to do an Orko would have been impossible.

Oh, yeah. No, I mean, I agree with that. I'm

not saying that Orko should have been in the

film at all. No, I agree with it, too. I mean,

at the time, you know, it's 1987, people. You

know, Star Wars, Superman, and, you know, hell,

we didn't even get Batman yet until two years

later, but Star Wars and Superman were pretty

much the only big -budget, you know, sci -fi,

superhero, action, fantasy films that we had

to go off of. And that's another thing. Did you

watch... You've watched it without the commentary

for the beginning, right? Mm -hmm. That is the

fucking Superman music It is the fucking Superman

theme I looked at the the credits for the the

composer I Loved what Bill Conti did with the

Thomas Crown Affair the 1996 or 1999 Remake of

Thomas Crown with Brosnan and Russo. Okay. I

love Bill Conti score of that. He ripped off

Was it John Williams that did Superman? I know

he's done Star Wars, but it was somebody. It

might have been John Powell. Oh God, I don't

know, but I swear to God that beginning few notes...

I didn't pick up on that. Huh? I didn't pick

up on that, but that's interesting. The beginning

few notes, if you go back and you watch the very

beginning of the film when they're going through

the credits sequence, the credits, the opening

credits sequence, the music is the Superman theme,

and... It pretty much goes the same way as the

Superman credits go with the with the little

universe thingy in the background that's kind

of like a galaxy thing and then the titles coming

through a little bit I I didn't realize that

I didn't realize that Gwildor was being played

by a 60 year old man though yeah Billy Barty

I didn't realize he was that old when he did

that mm -hmm that was kind of crazy yeah I guess

he could barely, like he had a limp in his step,

so they had to have a couple different, I think

they had two different stunt doubles help him

at different times, but going back to something

you were saying earlier, you were talking about

Mattel capitalizing on basically the toy line

and the cartoon and trying to, whether it was

trying to make... the little last bit of money

they could using the franchise or whether it

was an attempt to revitalize it to hope that

they could maybe I don't know redo the cartoon

or put another group of toys on it. I can't obviously

speak to that but what surprised me is if they

were doing that and it says in the commentary

that they had to approve everything that the

movie did basically so you know they were behind

the scenes and they had to basically sign off

on everything and So it surprised me if they

had that kind of power and that kind of position

to sign off on everything, and they were trying

to revitalize maybe the toy line of the cartoon,

why they let so many characters look nothing

like the toys of the cartoon. Oh, we'll get to

that. So that kind of surprised me. We'll still

get to that. Basic plot rundown here is that

Skeletor has taken over Grayskull. You know,

he's captured the sorceress. He's pretty much

won They find Skeletor he man and Tila and man

-in -arms find Skeletor's troops Hauling off

this Yoda wannabe and that's what I will be calling

him for the rest of this episode This Yoda wannabe

off and they save him and says something about

a cosmic key and this that and the other thing

and everything else they end up Getting into

the castle getting into a fight They have to

get out of there, so he randomly Hits keys and

whatever else on the musical thing on the cosmic

key and they get sent to earth My one problem

with this Like you were saying a second ago about

them not really including any of the other characters

character characters He meant secret. Oh, that

was the other thing where the fuck is Prince

Adam I mean, most significant of the differences

between the cartoons, the Mattel mini -comics,

and the film, Prince Adam, He -Man's secret identity,

is never depicted or even mentioned. Despite

being a major theme in the cartoon and comics,

it should be noted, however, that Prince Adam

also did not exist in the pre -filmation mini

-comics. Similarly, there are no references to

Orko, King Randoor, Queen Marlana, Trapjaw, Merman,

or any of the other major characters known from

the series. Furthermore, Skeletor is depicted

as having a large army of black armored soldiers

at his command. This allows him to conquer Eternia

primarily due to his military prowess rather

than via elaborate mystical plans as his Now...

The reason why I brought that up now when I was

mentioning that they got transported to Earth

I wish they would have gone back watched the

fucking cartoon caught on to the fact that Marlena

is from Earth and made some sort of something

there. It's just, oh my god. There's a lot of

things like, I realized that this is 1987, I

realized that there's limitations budget -wise,

there's limitations visual effects -wise, et

cetera, et cetera, et cetera, and you can blame

a lot of stuff on that, but it still doesn't

change. One of the things I like the least about

this movie is that they went to Earth. Now, I

realized they had to because they didn't have

the budget to create an entire movie based on

this mythical world of Eternia and everything

that would have came with it, you know, plant

life and creatures and etc, etc. So they had,

you know, to make it within the budget they're

like, oh, we'll just bring it to Earth and that

way everything is a lot easier. I get it. I don't

like it. I don't have to like it, even if I do

understand it. But I don't know. There's just

so many things that you can kind of write off

to. Okay, you can't have Oracle, so we have to

accept Gildor because of your limitations. We

have to accept that you went to Earth. Blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah. But, you know, you mentioned

the Prince Adam thing, and the funny thing about

that is, at least for me, is I watched... I don't

know if I've had the same reaction other times

I've watched it, but this last time when I watched

it, I actually completely forgot about Prince

Adam and completely forgot that they hadn't shown

him in the movie. Until, towards the end, He

-Man lifts up his sword and says, by the power

of Grayskull, or I have the power, whatever he

says in the movie, I don't know if it is, I don't

think he uses the exact line from the cartoon,

but it's pretty close. No, he uses the I have

the power line, I don't think he uses by the

power of Grayskull. Right. And it was up until

that point that I had completely forgot that

Prince Adam hadn't been shown, and then he did

that, and I'm like, wait a second. He's already

He -Man. Well, he was re -energizing himself.

Yeah, so while I realized I did that for the

fans, so you could have this iconic quote or

line or whatever, but I'm like, that was kind

of pointless. He was already He -Man. That was

a poor, poor fan service deal. Speaking of which,

the other thing that is not in this movie whatsoever

is Cringer or Battle Cat. Yeah, that would have

been cool. And impossible. By 1987 standards,

yeah, I know. He even talks about trying to,

that stupid cow that was at the beginning, how

hard it was, just like an hour just to get the

scene with a cow in it, because they couldn't

get the cow to do what they wanted. But I forgot

one thing, I gotta go back and track a second.

You mentioned basically what I'm gonna call the

foot soldiers, Skeletorers, Black Stormtroopers,

or whatever you wanna call them. Like, I have

a problem with them being in it, but... At the

same time, it goes back to the little thing,

like I can realize that they had to do that because

if you wanted as much action as they had in the

movie, all the main characters would have been

dead. Or we would have had a bunch of people

getting hit with stuff that didn't hurt them.

So I guess bringing the foot soldiers in is always

a good idea just so you can kill people off that

don't matter. Right. It just still kind of strikes

me weird after, if you're a kid watching a cartoon

and then all of a sudden you go to this movie,

you're like, okay, I get that some of the people

look different, but... Where the hell did all

these guys come from? So then you have Julie

and Kevin, and you have this cop, who is pretty

much Strickland from Back to the Future, except

he's a cop. You have them, they get a hold of

the cosmic key, you gotta... You know, they gotta

go back to attorney, they gotta do this, they

gotta do that. Julie's parents had already been

killed in some plane crash or whatever. And by

the end of the movie, Skeletor is defeated. And

they go back and Gweldor's like, Oh, well, I

can send you back in time, you know, whenever

or into the future or whatever. And right at

the last minute, Julie's like, Oh, wait, no,

send us back. Cut. Click. You know, and just

went through the portal. And then as... huh?

Yeah, I disagree. I'm following you. And as the

film closes, we find out that Gwildor did, in

fact, send her back before parents caught the

plane to stop them. She and Kevin meet up in

the street and they hold the orb or, you know,

the ball of attorney or whatever the hell it's

called. in their hands and you see it, you know,

fade into grayskull. And of course, the eye have

the power line and then, you know, end credits.

And the original draft of the script by David

O'Dell was reviewed in episode three of the He

-Man and She -Ra podcast. Well, I want to let

that show up, called Master's Cast. I've actually

watched that. I've listened to that a couple

times. Is it any good? It's alright. Okay. Uh,

the script revealed that the movie intended to

be more faithful to the original source material.

The original draft included more time spent on

Eternia, Snake Mountain, Beastman had a speaking

role, and even revealed that He -Man's mother

was originally from Earth, thus linking the two

pla - No, see, what the hell? Why the fuck didn't

they do that in the first fucking place, you

fucking morons? Wow. Remember, folks, the podcast

is exploring. Good thing, huh? Comparisons with

Jack Kirby's Fourth World. Comic book writer

slash artist John Byrne once compared the film

to Jack Kirby's comic book meta series, Fourth

World, stating in comic shop news number 497,

the best new God's movie is Masters of the Universe.

I even corresponded with the director who told

me this was his intent and then he had to get

Jack Kirby to do the production designs, but

the studio nixed it. Check it out, it requires

some bending on an occasional sex change, Metron

becomes an ugly dwarf, and Highfather becomes

the sorceress. But it's an amazingly close analog,

otherwise, Franklin Gell's Skeletor is a dandy

dark side. Um... God damn it. Director Gary Goddard

clarified this in a letter appearing in John

Byrne's Next Man, number 26, in which he stated,

Although it was a tough proposition to sell to

the studio at the time. Comics are just for kids,

they thought. And they would not allow me to

hire Jack Kirby, who I desperately wanted to

be the conceptual artist for the picture. I grew

up with Kirby's comics. I've stole all my marbles

from the first issue of Fantastic Four and Spider

-Man through the time Kirby left. And I had great

pleasure meeting him when he first moved to California.

Since that time, I enjoyed the friendship of

Jack and Roz and was lucky enough to spend many

hours with Jack hearing how he created this character

and that one and why villain has to be even more

powerful than a hero and on and on. Jack was

a great communicator and listening to him was

always an education. You might be interested

to know that I tried to dedicate Masters of the

Universe to Jack Kirby in the closing credits

but the studio took the credit. No disrespect

to Jack Kirby. Jack Kirby was an amazing comic

book person. I believe he was a writer and an

artist. The reason why I say comic book person

is because I don't want to get, you know, hate

mail saying, oh, he was this or he was that.

I'm just generalizing here. You know, no disrespect

to him, but Jesus fucking Christ, if you're gonna

have a movie that says, Masters of the Universe,

The Motion Picture, Have He -Man, The Sorceress,

Man in Arms, Skeletor, Evil In, all these people

from the fucking cartoon, and the Mattel toy

line don't base it off of the new gods. Yeah.

Oh god. Just kill me now. Did you, did uh, quick

question for you. Did you watch past all the

credits? No. Not this time. I don't remember

why. What's there? Just after all the credits

they go back to the movie for a quick scene and

they show Skeletor coming up out of the whatever,

ooze, fire, whatever, and he says something like,

I'll be back, or something like that. It's kind

of a nice little thing at the end, even though

they never did a sequel. Still, whatever. So

we gotta talk a little bit, I guess I don't have

a script in front of me, so I might be going

off, but we should talk about some of these characters

that are made up. Trag, or Krog, or whatever

the fuck his name is. Whatever. Basically, the

characters that are made up that didn't exist

before this, we already talked about Gwildor

a little bit. Then you got Card, who's a white

-haired... I don't know what you want to call

him. And then you have Sauron. What's that? A

white -haired piece of shit. And then you have

Sauron. who is the lizard mechanical thing that

gets killed by Skeletor. And then you have Blade,

who has swords and stuff like that all over his

body. Out of Gwildor, Sauron, Karg, and Blade,

are there any that you like? Fuck no. Ouch. I

actually, even as a kid watching this, even though

they weren't in He -Man, I always have really

liked the Blade character. I don't know why,

but I just always thought he was cool as a kid.

I liked all the swords and the knives and the

daggers and everything everywhere, and I kind

of thought he was cool, but I didn't really care

for any of the other ones. Card was too ridiculous

looking with it. It looked like, you know what

it looked like, it looked like the freaking,

it looked like the freaking witch. A cross between

the witch from Robin Hood with Kevin Costner.

and the little guys in Princess of Billy Crystal

and Princess Bride. That's what it looks like.

Looks like a cross between those two. Just fucking

shoot me now. What? These fucking made -up characters.

Ugh. Yeah. Well, I mean, I get some of them,

but this is one of my cardinal rules that I hate

when films break. It is when you take a cartoon

that has And I understand, okay, I get it. Oracle's

impossible, maybe Battle Cat's impossible. You

know, I don't disagree with that that was impossible

whatsoever, but making up fucking characters

like the ones they made up. And what I'm saying

is, if you could pull off, even though I don't

necessarily agree with this whole design, but

if you could bring in Beastman, then there's

no reason you couldn't have found some of the

other guys in the show to bring in here. You

know, fine. Have somebody else be Orko, whatever.

I can stomach that one if that's the only character.

And I can stomach the foot soldiers, maybe. But

you don't need to make up characters if you have

a plethora of characters to choose from. I get

that some of the characters in He -Man might

have been impossible to bring in. That's fine.

There was other ones that you could have. You

know what I mean? Maybe it doesn't make sense

to bring Merman in because you have no scene

that has to do with water. There's other bad

guys. You can bring in Trapjaw. Why couldn't

Trapjaw have been made? Somebody tell me why

Trapjaw could not have been made in 1987. You

could have brought in Triclops. You could have

brought in, well, I don't know if they could

do Stratos, but... Triclops would have been easy.

Trapjaw would have been easy. You take Sauron,

Carg, and Blade out. You bring in Trapjaw, Triclops,

and find one more bad guy, and you're good. Even

if you don't, you don't have to... you know they

had enough good guys i don't think they needed

straddle even though he's one of my favorite

characters it would have been hard for him to

fly around and stuff you know you didn't necessarily

need any other good guys you had man -at -arms

you had tila you had the sorceress you had he

-man what about ram -man everybody needs ram

-man but i'm saying in the story you have four

or five good guys so you wouldn't have had to

have more even i think those guys would have

been it would have been possible to bring some

of those guys in but there's no reason why trap

john triton get a fucking excuse my language

human being put a freaking thing around his eyes

that you can maneuver and you're done and give

him a little costume there was nothing hard about

that if you could do blade you could do trap

jaw yeah so i i hate that one i hate it when

movies do it i hate it when transformers does

it i hate it i fucking hate it and transformers

is even though that's a whole nother story i

mean you had 350 characters to choose from and

you had to make new ones up, dumb bastard. Well,

you know, Michael Bay continually rapes our childhood,

like Starscream rapes metal bugs, but you know.

That's just one thing I'll never forgive and

I don't get it. I don't get it. Is it like a

God complex from these directors that, oh, we

can't use all characters that are already in

existence. I gotta have some type of stamp on

this, so I'm gonna make up my own new character.

Fuck that. I hate it when people do that. Getting

off topic just a little bit here, Steve and I

will be recording a commentary this coming Saturday

when this episode releases for Transformers,

the 2007 film. I don't want to listen to that

commentary. Yes, you do. I don't want to listen

to you rip on the movie out there. Oh, whatever.

All right, so getting into the reaction here

with a budget of 17 million the movie grossed

17 million three hundred and thirty six thousand

three hundred and seventy dollars in the u .s.

An additional combined 1 .5 million in Germany

in Australia it is referred to as a flop by variety

magazine and has a 13 % rotten rating at rotten

tomatoes Aborted attempts at sequels. Canon films

intended to create a sequel, which is indicated

after the end credits like you saw before. The

Skeletor has in fact survived since fall. The

idea was abandoned when Canon wouldn't pay for

Mattel's fees, and the production used already

made costumes and sets for the improvised action

movie Cyborg. A new He -Man movie, directed by

John Woo, was reportedly being developed. But

despite many rumors circulating around the internet

regarding this film's production status, the

casting, and the project was never officially

greenlit, the film rights to He -Man have reportedly

since reverted back to Mattel. We will have a

He -Man movie. A 2011 film! As recently as fall

of 2008, there was a new feature film in development

entitled Grayskull, Masters of the Universe,

produced by Joel Silver, and written by Justin

Marks. The film would reportedly employ visual

effects to a large degree as done with 300. An

alleged script has been leaked. Recently the

studio announced that Kung Fu Panda director

John Stevenson will take on directing duties

probably with a new screenplay. Now I'm going

to look this up really quick to see if there's

any new information on this because when I got

the original wiki information for the Masters

of the Universe coverage It's been about six,

eight months since I got it, so... You know,

I don't care what the rumors say, it's only a

matter of time. You've had Transformers live

action movie, you've had G .I. Joe live action

movie, you've had other stuff, you know, from

other comical type cartoons. You're gonna have

another live action He -Man. It's just a matter

of what year it's gonna come out. That's all

it is. Oh, no, no, I know that. But it's one

of those things where, you know... You know,

there's all this speculation on it, and what's

gonna happen with it, and you know, who's gonna

be He -Man? I honestly could not stand the Russian

from Rocky IV, V, whatever the fuck it was, as

He -Man. You don't like Dolph Lundgren? No, not

really. His accent kinda screwed it up for me.

I thought that was perfect casting for He -Man

at the time. That's one of the people I have

no problems with. There's four people I have

no problems with in this movie. He -Man's one

of them. I think that was perfect as far as the

look. He had the blonde Adonah type guy. You

know, obviously he didn't speak much because

that actor can't really speak much. But I thought

look -wise it was perfect. I thought the look

of the sorcerer was good. I thought the look

of Skeletor, he was usually the best character

in the movie. And I think they got it right with

Man -At -Arms. I thought that was... I mean,

it's an easy one to do, but that one was right.

I don't like how they did Eva Lin, and Tila's

interesting. Tila, I don't think they came even

close to trying to represent what the cartoon

was, as far as Tila goes, but I will say that

for once, and I don't think I've ever said this

about another movie based on a cartoon, I like

the movie version of Tila better than the cartoon

version. Nah. I don't know why. I never liked

Tila in the cartoon and I liked Tila in this

movie. I don't like either version. First time

I've ever liked a movie character better than

the cartoon that it was based on. Yeah, I can't

find anything on it yet. There hasn't really

been much activity flavor. I gotta throw this

out there since we're talking about characters

and stuff. I hate Courtney Cox. This is the first

film I think she ever starred in. I can't be

for sure about that, but I know this is the first

film that I ever saw her in. This is her first

film. This is her first film. It's the guy that

she's, I think it's her boyfriend in the film,

his first film. I hate Courtney Cox. I hate Courtney

Cox in everything. I hate Courtney Cox in TV.

I hate Courtney Cox on movies. I hate Courtney

Cox in this. Did you catch the scene when they

had When they went back to Eternia and Skeletor

was like almost making out with Evo Lynn. Yeah.

I hate that scene too. That was the only scene

of Skeletor that I think I disliked. I'm like,

why are they trying to make an intimate scene

between Evo Lynn and Skeletor? They never had

a thing for each other and that's disgusting.

But I do like Skeletor and I think they did an

excellent job with the makeup and the mask. They

said they were the fool. maybe the only second

good thing that came out of commentary was that

he was talking about his debate and going back

and forth of having a hard more skull -like looking

head so it was more faithful to the cartoon versus

having a more like a latex like soft thing so

you can see the actor a little bit more and he

could be performing and kind of that they went

for that middle ground and I think they did do

an excellent job with the whole oh yeah Skeletor

is awesome in this I mean hands down Skeletor

is by far the best character It's the best design

in the entire film. And that's the thing, they

could do Skeletor. I mean, think of it. You had

a cartoon that was a purple, purplish -blue skeleton.

And you made that into the movie. So if you could

do that, you could have done almost any other

character except for flying ones. Yeah. Yeah,

you know, it's just one of those things where

you know, I used to covet this film I used to

just absolutely love it and I so wanted to get

like I said before I had been wanting to get

my hands on the DVD for a number of years and

when I finally did and I watched it I watched

it like regularly just as the film and then I

went back and I watched the commentary The Gary

Goddard or God eater go whatever the fuck the

dude's name is is Out... Singly, the worst commentary

I've ever heard outside of the Tim Burton commentaries

on the two Batman films Burton did. I cannot

listen to a Tim Burton commentary. I would lose

fucking brain cells over that and I lost brain

cells over listening to this idiot. Yeah, if

you need to hear that. He talks... I think I

should have counted. I think it was 50... 5700

times where he talks about lightning. And it's

flat lighting versus the actual lighting. Yep.

And then I hate that it's a standard. Yeah, pretty

much. I honestly do not think this movie stands

the test of time whatsoever. It doesn't. It is

so fucking dated. Of course it's dated. But it's

dated in the same way that... Oh, this is...

You can't say that. No, go ahead, say it. Say

it! No, I'm not saying that. Say it! I think

the visual effects were as good as they could

be for the time. I think the effects that they

used in the movie, the makeup and stuff like

that, was as good as you could get in that time.

It's kind of like... I'm trying to think of a

couple different movies that are from that same

time period. If you look at the Ewok movies that

were made, whatever, the Battle for Endor or

the... Moon Over End or whatever the damn movie

was yeah, and if you like the dark crystal and

a couple movies like that it looks Affected and

visually just as good as those movies do That

being said for some reason it seems when you

watch it a lot more dated than those movies Hmm

yeah At least dark crystal it seems more dated

to me you darker. That's just a creepy movie

for that Anyway. You know, I just can't... Outside

of the Skeletor design, outside of them giving

very very poor fan service with the I have the

power line, I just can't say anything good about

this fucking movie. For some reason I like it.

I think it's just nostalgia and just me remembering

it. The nostalgia for me is gone. The nostalgia's

never gone for me. Nostalgia never leaves me,

but you know, it is hard to... It's not hard

for me to watch, but I've never watched it with

someone that it wasn't hard for them to watch.

But I can watch it just fine. I mean, you had

to have grown up with He -Man, you had to have

been a fan of it as a kid, and even then you

still might not enjoy it, but if you didn't do

those things, you sure as hell aren't gonna enjoy

it. Unless you just love old crappy sci -fi fantasy

movies. And you know what? The other thing that

really pisses me off, and this is more with the

He -Man fandom anymore, with the Masters of the

Universe fandom, and the different spellings

of Grayskull. Whether it's G -R -A or G -R -E.

It's G -R -A, dammit! I just watched the YouTube

commercial of the old Grayskull playset. On the

box, it says G -R -A. It's not spelled with a

fucking E. I didn't know that was a point of

contention. It'd be pretty easy to look back

at the toy. Well, it is for me. Because people

just can't get shit right. Oh, God. Well, at

least this Masters of the Universe episode didn't

last four hours and twenty -something minutes.

That's true. It is better than the New Adventures

of He -Man cartoon. Whoa! Wait, you're saying

this film is better than that cartoon? You know

which cartoon I'm talking about, right? Yeah.

Oh, wait! Not the 2003 one. Oh, okay, never mind.

Yeah, I know. I thought you were talking about

the 2002 series. No, it's better than the New

Adventures of He -Man. Where it's still a talk

about the drag queen. franchise. God, if we didn't

have to record two episodes of Tooncast after

finishing this, I would so break out my He -Man

DVDs and watch that cartoon again right now.

Just to get some real nostalgia, because this

just doesn't... It had a... I guess it had a

defense storyline? No. No! An action, but...

It had action, but it had Star Wars action! Basically,

uh, Skeletor is the Emperor. Gwild Doff, or Gwild

Dweed, or Gwild Dweeb is Yoda. He -Man is a combination

between Luke Skywalker and Han Solo. I'm telling

you, if you replaced every single sword or staff

in this film with lightsabers, it's He -Man with

Star Wars. You could have Man -At -Arms as Obi

-Wan Kenobi and Blade as both of them. Teela

can be Leia. Oh, God. I would much rather have

Carrie Fisher over whoever the hell played Teela.

The only character you're not gonna be able to

recast is Eva Lin. All the other ones I think

you can get away with putting someone else in

there. Yeah, pretty much. But I don't know. There's

something about it that I feel like even though

I will admit it's a very crappy movie. I'm almost

sad. I paid six dollars for this thing now. I

don't hate it as much as you do. Any 80s cartoon

or He -Man fan should own the DVD though. Right.

No, I know, but it's just one of those things

where, you know, honestly when I was doing my

little recap before we started recording this

episode, I honestly had to start skipping scenes

because it, oh my god, it was just so freak -

I had to skip the whole scene where, um, Gwildor

is mooing at the fucking cow. Yeah. Oh my god.

Or when he comes out and drags in that one scene.

Don't remind me! Stop it! Stop it! How about

when he shoots water out of his ears? Oh god.

Like a little fucking dog. Oh my god. This just

does not do Masters of the Universe or He -Man

Universe whatever justice whatsoever. It just

doesn't. The only thing that does, the only thing

to the actual, you know, Mattel toys and cartoon

series that does justice is Skeletor. Um, I think

Man in Arms too. Yeah, he was okay, but... He

looked like him. Yeah, he looked like him. Barely.

He was much skinnier. Yeah. Other than that,

though, I agree to a certain point. But I still

like Blade. No. Just... Made -up characters don't

fucking count. Okay. So, um... Do we have anything

else we want to bring up or pimp out or anything

before I go into the closing? Um... No. Thank

you for joining us here on MWIRE movie weekend

review. There are several ways to get in contact

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enjoyed this episode of M .Y .R. and wish you'll

join us next time when Steve Megatron will be

back and we will be reviewing the Ace Ventura

films. For now, IMTF's you on mic with... Thank

you for listening. Until next time. Now! I have

the power! You! You will no longer stand between

me and my destiny! But I will. I told you it

was always between us. Oh, I yearn to smash you

out of existence! To drive your cursed face from

my memory forever! Yes! Let this be our final

battle! Victory! Victory! Victory. Well, Lubick,

look at you. So you're really gonna stay here,

huh? Are you kidding? What am I gonna go back

there for? And look what I got here. I got a

castle. I got a view. I got clean air. I got

a beautiful woman. Some kind of retirement, huh?

Julie, keep this with you, and Eternia will always

be near. Thank you. I guess this is really goodbye,

huh? Eman, Tila, and Orbs, don't... Don't say

goodbye. Say good journey. In a world, there,

I said it. Happy.