Sex Criminals Volume 1 Review

The following content is of a sexually explicit

nature. The review here inside the pull bag of

a Image Comics series is not for children. It

should not even be heard around some adults.

You have been warned. Now, let's get to the pull

bag and this latest episode. Join us as we dig

on our latest comics and discuss them with a

rotating panel of the GCRN crew. So sit back

and enjoy this week's Pull Bag. Hello and welcome

to The Pull Bag. This is yet again another Back

Issue Classics episode and we are one week away

from Thanksgiving. Well, we're one week and one

day away from Thanksgiving and what better way

to talk ab - What better way to kick off the

killing turkey season by talking about sex? I

am your host, TFGio and Mike. As you heard at

the very top of this show, there is a very, very,

very explicit warning on this podcast. Do not

let your children hear this at all whatsoever.

uh... this is for this is basically ms f w people

this is ms f w this is ms f home this is ms f

whatever it is just not safe for anything so

you need to listen to this in your own little

quiet closet or corner or wherever uh... not

that we are going to necessarily be more explicit

than what we normally are But because of the

content that we are covering here in the third

week of November 2014 Yeah, you have been warned.

I am of course TFG and Mike Jeremy is Jeremy

fine. Hello. How you doing? This is gonna be

an interesting one To say the least, you know,

I I recorded a podcast and unfortunately a lot

of the Hanukkah casts got Deleted due to a virus

and after I changed RS feeds, but one of them

was on sex and comics and I'm Familiar. I mean

dating back to the Tijuana journals and Maggie

Co Fritz the cat Barbarella Nothing new, but

I think this one this one seems to be a little

bit more tasteful Or don't don't reveal it just

yet. Yeah Here's the thing folks I have been

I Know everyone when this podcast when I started

this podcast. I was heavy DC. I'm still Kinda

into DC, but at this point I'm just looking for

damn good comics and damn good storylines that

are gonna pull me in You know you heard JT from

Saskatoon and I talked about the first volume

of John layman's chew from Image Comics And you

know that's about a guy who Technically has a

cannibalism problem, you know And while I do

love that that that series at this point because

we in that episode we reviewed the first two

trades In the next one that we do I don't know

when that'll be but we'll be talking about the

next two trades volume 3 and volume 4 so at this

point because they DC has changed Batgirl beyond

what I Used to like and Gail Simone's no longer

on the title uh... they canceled or whatever

ended batman beyond universe two point oh with

kyle higgins so i'm pretty much done kind of

with dc like the only title that i'm really interested

in and that's going to be changing here as you

heard last week with a despair and i uh... actual

two weeks ago with a despair and i talking about

him in the message university seven twelve uh...

that is still going to be going on but it's going

to change into attorney war uh... other than

that dc Arkham Manor I could say is the only

actual DC title that has to do with their characters

That I'm actually really excited about right

now. There is nothing for me at DC anymore You

know, I'm going backwards on DC. I actually I'm

looking at the Gotham City sirens only because

I Kind of miss what happened before the new 52

took over so I'm going backwards on a lot of

the stuff Well, it's pretty much not gonna matter

in friggin April since everything is gonna converge

Yeah, you know that this is the problem with

DC that it's 75 years and you know what but Marvel

I'm shaking my finger at you to Marvel because

you had ultimate then you have Marvel now and

it's like I've been now supposedly with this

new a secret wars trailer it's all new marvel

so instead of marvel now next year it's supposed

to be all new marvel so that that there have

been people that have surmised and and guessed

in and assume that they're gonna do a reboot

like what dc did i don't know if that's possible

i don't know if they're that's they're gonna

do honestly i don't care my whole point of even

us even talking about this far into the big two

in a you know in our disdain for some of the

stuff that they're doing is the fact that, as

I said a moment ago, at this point I'm looking

for comics that have stories and art that engage

me, that interest me. It doesn't necessarily

have to be a franchise, you know, an established

franchise, even though I still hold IDW Publishing

as my number one favorite publisher at this point.

Image Comics is vastly creeping up. to be a tie

with idw for me because so far i've got cowl

by kyle higgins alex uh alex siegel not alex

alec siegel uh and rod rice i've got chew with

john layman and now we've got from matt fraction

and chip zinarski we've got sex criminals um

I wasn't sure what to think of this. I don't

even know who suggested this to me. I just somehow

found it. I really don't know how the hell I

got interested in this comic. Like chew I kind

of know how I got interested in that someone

I think it was JT that told me oh He's a he's

a guy who you know can solve crime by eating

things or can figure out things by by eating

things and there's you know a slight edge of

cannibalism in it and and This that the other

thing and everything else so but sex criminals.

I have no idea now I am NOT a prude, but at the

same time I don't I'm not a sexual outrovert,

I guess you could say. It's just one of those

things where, you know, I don't know, it's just

some things I don't talk about and, you know,

sex is kind of one of them a lot of times. But

with this book, if this hadn't come out in 2013,

this might have been. the best comic series of

2014, if it hadn't already been out, you know,

if the first issue didn't debut in 2013. This

is by far the funnest, or the most fun, I should

say, that I've had with a comic. Just some of

the stuff of this trade. We are covering the

first five issues of Sex Criminals, Sex Criminals

Volume 1, One Weird Trick. What do you think

of the trade cover? Because I assume you have

the digital copy of the trade. Well, the cover

itself seems to just be bland compared to what

we're going to get into. But I do like the image.

as we get a little further with Susie and, you

know, where her hair is and the book having her

private parts and Susie down in the quiet. I

love that. I mean, the images right now just,

as I said, for the cover looks tame. Well, I

think what they're doing with the cover and you

know what Matt fraction you can correct me if

I'm wrong Chip Zdarsky you too I think what they're

doing is they're trying to make a cover for the

trade and I'm sure this is from one of the issue

covers I don't know. I haven't actually looked

at any of the the issue covers before we recorded

this episode, but Think what they're trying to

do is kind of blur the lines to kind of give

you a taste without actually like offending people

because because let's face it this is about sex

and Some people are not as open as others so

Think with covers like this and I and I could

be completely wrong I'm gonna have to you know

as as we go through this maybe when we take the

break here after the intro I'll have to go to

image comics his website and look at some of

the covers for the first five issues And I know

we'll kind of go over some of them in the back

of the trade at the at the end of the show here

today But I think really what this this trade

cover is to kind of give you a you know Taste

of things to come to quote Shang Tsung. It's

just one of those things where It's kind of cool.

It's kind of nice. It's kind of interesting and

it gives you something that you know, you You

don't quite know what you're getting into but

you kind of do just by the title So in the trade

Matt and Chip have dedications and Matt says

To anyone, anywhere, literally at any time in

human history, whoever rubbed one out, you are

the real heroes. And then Chip's dedication is,

to my darling Jessica, wherever you may be. Oh,

you are behind me. What the fuck? Little semen

stains all over the page. That's what it looks

like. Yeah. Yeah, it could be it I Don't know

um and we had now instead of having like a full

-on trade cut like a full on egg like Again,

I'm gonna have to look at this once we take a

break here in a second but uh... we kind of get

to the first chapter the first issue and as you

said you know susie down the quiet uh... we're

going to take a quick break uh... you hear a

couple ads were to come back with this first

issue after this Alright folks, we are back and

what they have done, because during the break

I looked at the Image Comics website where they

have the listings for the sex criminals issues

and what they have done in the trade is something

that I really really like and I cannot like I

wish more comic companies would do trades like

this What they've done is they've taken the original

covers from issues one through five and made

them full -size images in the trade so You know,

we already had the the image comics logo uh...

you know in the beginning so this first uh...

this first image this pink background image where

it says no uh... one susie down in the quiet

and as you already described it's her with a

gun and god knows what else is i don't even know

what's in her left hand i know the gun is in

her right hand uh... and it's got the book over

her uh... private parts I really dig this. I

think this is cool that they're doing full -size

images in the trade, and I honestly cannot wait

until the second trade comes out in January.

This is going to be amazing. What do you think

of them taking the regular covers for each issue

and making them full -size here? To me it makes

more sense. This way you're advertising the images

a little bit better and the book a little bit

better. Which is as you as we discussed during

the break. This is how you should be doing a

trade and I think what she's holding in her hand

and You know don't ask why I know this it is

a sex No, no, it's not a vibrator. It's it's

kind of like a mini whip. Oh, okay Yeah, yeah,

it's something that yeah But I mean I love love

The the full -size image it's just so cool. So

we have Suzy down in the quiet and it opens up

with the opening narration of her talking about

How she It opens up with and that's not John.

That's not John. Is it I think it is John I think

it is John. Yeah, cuz they're in the that's right

there in the bathroom. It is them. Okay It opens

up with running water as the first upper left

hand panel in the background You see like this

bright shiny glossy kind of thing So you have

all the all the panels of page one and then behind

them you have this giant super gloss thing that

will reveal here in a moment uh... and apparently

someone is hunting them and she goes to say basically

that uh... you know she says uh... uh... you

know she says hey give me that back and all this

and all that and everything else and These other

unknown people who we don't see say, hey, YouTube,

Jonathan, Suzanne, this is your very last chance,

children. Now all three, we're coming in after

you. And I mean, this is just amazing. That bottom,

I'm trying to think which one it is. It's the

very bottom left -hand panel. the red background

panel on the first page. Oh, yeah. In guided

view looks amazing blown up. What do you think

of this opening? Well, for me, I wasn't too sure

what was going on. I knew that somebody was trying

to break in and I figured that I tried to surprise

myself because I heard bits and pieces about

this comic, but I wanted to go click and just

judge for myself. So I thought Whatever they

did, they did something terrible and they figured

there was a last moments on earth and they were

just going to go out with an orgasm is what I

thought. And because we don't know who this dark

figure is or what's going on. But you're right.

Blown up with that image in the background in

the red. To me, it almost feels like something

out of Frank Miller, you know, out of Sin City.

But this is drawn a little bit better. So I have

to give. You know, these two, a lot more credits.

And yeah, I mean, then we have images with the

faucet with the water spouting. It's almost like

because this is a sex comic or, you know, you

know. sex issues and whatnot so I love what the

faucet is like she acts like she's ready to have

an orgasm but she's holding back but she's having

many ones and then you could just see a facial

expression then we cut back to the faucet again

like the way it's doing the countdowns where

he's stripping her naked and he's saying you

know we're coming in after you we could just

you know see them in the red and then it's like

one and then like two like she's starting and

then you know Go right to the next panel where

he's on top of her and I love then the caption

where this is Suzanne's narration Where it's

like I know how this looks don't judge us But

here's what I love though is that now I guess

we can give this away when they have sex and

the orgasm apparently they have powers to stop

time and Yes, what's great about this? I love

the little images of the light how time is stopping

and it's going over with them having orgasm and

you can see how much she's getting into this,

but I want to go back to those images how they're

using the water coming out of the faucet as some

sort of symbolism about how she's ready, how

they're able to have a sex scene and how they're

able to symbolize it at the same time. I think

the symbolization is that they are We'll come

to see this in the coming pages, that she started

this by basically, not necessarily drowning herself

as a child, but basically she used her bathtub

as a... unlit self deprivation tank basically

is what because as as this first issue kind of

goes along we go we we find out about her father's

death and and her coping mechanisms and everything

else and how her mother handled it and how she's

handling it and you know we get what what's so

cool about this is this is kind of like a flashback

well It is a flashback, but it's a flashback

done very well because you have adult Susie in

the same place as she was, you know, as child

Susie. Like, that's what I love about this, is

how the narration and the explanation are so

well executed here, and how she is just looming

in the background like the ghost of Christmas

sex or something. I don't know. Whatever. It's

just one of those things where This is what made

this like we're only on you know The fourth fifth

or sixth page and you know, she's it just it's

wonderful. So we find out about her father's

death We find out how her mother and her are

coping and her mother cries a lot You know, she

doesn't think that you know, Susie can hear it,

we see the scene where she emerges herself in

the bathtub, and then obviously she is masturbating

at this time, or she eventually starts, and I

think that's the symbolism of the water, is that's

how she found out about her... Quiet time her

quiet place or you know the quiet that's how

she found out about it how she explored her powers

and I think that's really interesting I subscribed

to a web page called beautiful agony and it's

all about orgasm, but it's done with people with

the neck up and they are expressing orgasm they

confess about how they first had one at a young

age and why a lot of them and you know i'll even

do self -disclosure because let's be honest our

parents are not roadmaps and susie apparently

is using the bathtub as an escape because what

i what i just want to go back to i love kid susie

and how you know we see the image of a father

he was thrown out of a building and it was one

of those you know glass buildings you know all

windows and him being thrown out and i love when

she's trick -or -treating and she just walks

up to this guy's house he goes like i'm the little

girl whose dad just died he just opens up her

bag and she's getting all this candy so like

i practically made myself diabetic like it's

how she's traumatized but she's not gonna go

ape just yet and she uses the bathtub as an escape

and i guess she figures yeah you're right she's

using the tub as self -deporation. She's using

the, you know, masturbation as her quiet time.

And I guess because with a lot of young girls,

and I've heard a lot of confessions on Beautiful

Agony where a lot of women have claimed that

one day they were just bored and they just started

to, you know, in the bathtub and playing with

the faucet or whatever and they had an orgasm

and they didn't realize what it was and they

didn't know how to have another one a few years

later. I guess with Suzy, Because of everything

that's happened in this universe, she's able

to not only control her desires, but can control

and get her time back. And she can't reverse

it, but she'll slow it down. And what's great

about these images, because it is supposed to

be kids, Susie, it's not so much as porn as we're

seeing, like, her from the neck up and her hair

floating around. And then, like, We have this

great image or I guess it's kids Susie in the

bathtub or a leg is out of the tub, but adult

Susie is just explaining like how she's discovering

herself and we see how she's gained her powers

and we see the floating, you know, aspects of

time and all in all it works for these first

few pages. Everything is straight into the point.

And how she's mastering our powers. Exactly.

And that is what is, again, this is what's so,

you know, people might hear this episode and

think that, you know, some people think sex is

bad. And, you know, it's one of those things

where, you know, she has, you know, they've taken

this whole first issue to explain to us You know

her sexual evolution her growing up her dealing

with the stress of her father dying in the emotional

conflict her mother feels and as you already

said her kind of wanting to escape and They take

a whole issue to set this up and it's written

fraction writes. It's so well. I don't If people

go back, and I think it's episode 26, if people

go back and listen to episode 26 of The Pull

Bag, that was Ryan Merkley and I, I believe,

I think it was Ryan, talking about Hawkeye volumes

one and two, which is also written by Matt Fraction.

I'm not, like this is the second series I've

read by Fraction, ever. And this is easily his

best. out of the two series that I've read Hawkeye

just didn't really it just didn't really click

with me but this one is just amazing it really

really is and I love the bathtub scene where

she you know where we see her when she says I

wasn't the first girl in my class and I wasn't

the last but I suppose until then I thought it

was something that only the dirty girls did and

you see a close -up of her smile and then she

says time stopped literally and I knew you know

what scratch that I had no idea what was happening

to me whatsoever and then we see her coming up

out of the bathtub and Chips art and this is

amazing like it's the first time that I've seen

art from this artist and the art the colors the

effects on on the time stop It's so amazing.

I love the fact all as I said before it's somebody

who's Unaware of how to pleasure themselves at

a young age because I forget how old young Susie

supposed to be at this moment But I think it's

middle or high school. It's she might be somewhere

between 13 and 16 Maybe yeah, I thought it's

between junior high school and high school. Yeah

usually a lot of the people as I said on beautiful

Angie have confessed is between 8 and 10 Because

it's just out of curiosity and boredom one day

and they just do it and you know You get the

idea here I love the fact when she's getting

to bed and she's looking under the covers to

find out what she's done And of course I love

it at the bottoms like I was confused and terrified.

How can anything feel so good? How can everything

make how can anything make everything get so

quiet because she's coming down from that factory

period where you know she had an orgasm and she's

trying to come down from it and she doesn't know

how to yet and then which is trying to ask people

questions because you know like what it was like

to masturbate for the first time and she's asking

all the adult questions but then in gym class

she's being considered a slut because the other

girls don't seem to get it now for me it was

weird because as I said my parents were workaholics

so I couldn't talk to them about sex and we actually

had sex in a junior high school in 6th grade.

I actually even had an elementary school in 5th

grade, and no joke, my public school was PS69.

But, you know, it was co -ed for some reason.

It was both for the boys and girls, which was

even more bizarre, because the girls would have

to sit in, and we would have to watch a video

with boys reaching puberty, and then we would

have to watch a video the next day of a girl

having a period. And it was like... We're both

confusing are both young and we're still in a

cycle where we like girls, but we're not into

them at this point So I can understand how Susie

Because there were you know more adult things

we weren't really getting into as of yet Susie

seems to be asking the right questions which

makes sense because she's discovered herself,

but unfortunately the more realistic situation

is, she's now ostracized. So because she's ostracized,

she finds herself going back into the tub and

trying to make everything that everyone has just

thought of her as being a bad girl go away. And

then like a phoenix, we see how she's risen and

she turns back into adult Susie, and she's like,

that's better high, and she's back to normal,

and you can see where the faucet is, where the

water's coming out from. But I love how she awakens,

like she's trying to give herself a hug, and

her eyes just open up, and she has this gigantic

smile. So all in all, it is, you know, well written,

especially the images of the faucet, how it just,

you know, how not only is the water coming out,

how the time lapses are showing, and how the

water is getting, you know... more forceful.

So yeah, it is absolutely the best artwork I've

seen in this type of comic. Absolutely. So after

this last panel on this page here, we get to

the next thing where she's still in middle school,

high school, whatever, and says, Mom, woke me

at 2 a .m. screaming that I'd left the tub running

all night and flooded the bathroom. Yeah. I blamed

an intruder. I suppose I knew what had happened,

but I still didn't know. Yeah. I kind of like

this because now we get into her wanting to know

about this. Wanting to know about sex and trying

to learn about it from various sources and you

know, we see that... She just needs to get away

from everything And of course her release Literally

and figuratively is you know the tub I know she's

stopping time when she masturbates, but it looks

really weird to me that her entire body is on

like this this panel here after she says finally

finally the next panel where she's Completely

submerged in the water and uh and she's got her

eyes open and whatever i don't know it just it

just looks strange well she she's had an orgasm

and as i said uh i i keep going and i probably

will dozens of times a beautiful agony once you

know a female and you see it neck up uh achieve

orgasm and they're by themselves after they masturbate

you know they want to Hold something or hold

on to something, you know, they're coming down

from just having the orgasm So she's giving herself

a giant hug. I mean any other Position she would

grab on to something. She's having something

intense and pleasurable that makes sense to me

in the fact She has a giant smile. She's achieved

what she's wanted. So yeah, I mean that then

to me you know, is nothing new. I love that image

because it's real and it's honest. She wants,

if somebody was next to her, she would be holding

somebody, but because she's with herself, she's

holding herself. So I've seen a lot of these

videos where, you know, they're giving themselves

hugs after all is said and done. Absolutely.

Absolutely. So um let's see here we get to you

know we get to her kind of you know time lapsing

through everything and um and well she's in college

now and she well yeah she's in college now but

like it it fast forwards in the quiet place like

it goes from her saying uh that's better hi you

know it goes from that to her being oh no i wait

no that was that was rachel yeah how is rachel

talking to her when she is in the quiet place

that's what i want to know the only thing i can

think of is that she's having flashbacks because

either she's while she's masturbating or she's

in the quiet place she's Thinking of other things

that have happened in her life because she's

been so stressed So the thing the only thing

I can think of is that she's trying to take all

the negatives and make them positive But then

we of course we get to a bottom image where that

girl says hey slap, but it's cut off So the only

thing I can think of is that? She's trying to

usually and a lot of women and guys have said

this as well is that? When you're masturbating

or whatever the case may be or making love with

a partner you want to be in the zone, but sometimes

you could be so stressed and You start to trail

off and think about everyday worries and for

her I'm assuming she's trying to think of all

the good things. She wants to have an orgasm

to escape, but unfortunately right now, she's

being distracted by everything that's happened

in her life. And that's what I love about the

image where the girl comes back and she's being

cut off by saying, you know, it's E -Y -L -U

-T. And I love the fact that when she's trying

to have sex with other guys, they either don't

know what they're doing to satisfy her or they're

trying too hard or too little and she's even

saying that when she thought she would achieve

orgasm like we see an image where she's walking

down a ball or a stairway and it almost looks

like a ballroom with people dancing i know it's

not but it looks like that it's supposed to be

wondrous that she's sharing her desires with

a male partner or any partner and she just can't

seem to achieve it and then she goes back to

you know her kid self where she's just trying

to you know handle everyday life and the only

time she can handle anything is pretty much making

love to herself yeah now I did kind of get confused

here because these panels where the one where

I just mentioned that's better high when she's

sitting in the tub that is her getting out of

the tub talking see I thought I thought for some

odd reason that the girl walking away was her

not the girl in the towel the girl in the towel

is Susie the girl walking away is her roommate

Rachel because the next part of the panel shows

oh hang on a second it's going away and so we

see the two of them talking which is fine so

now I don't have a problem with it because at

first I thought it was Rachel talking to her

while she was in the quiet place and I'm like

well wait wait a minute here something isn't

right and it was just me not realizing who was

who Yeah, I got a little confusing at first but

at the end it's also supposed to be Where she's

been or you know what she's trying to experience?

Absolutely, I think the problem is is because

she's trying to focus on reality and in her mind

when she's masturbating Reality, you know starts

to become her desires and then we see her reality

and unfortunately her reality was shit no matter

what you know college post college of course

we go back to middle school for her she just

can't fit in because of so many problems that

are going especially with her mother right well

of course we know with her mother mother's turned

to alcohol which you can't blame her for and

she can't and she has questions Of course, she's

still being considered an outcast because whatever

question she asks You know, it's not the right

ones and nobody really wants to deal with her

right Absolutely But I do love when she confronts

the mean girls because when she does it and I

love it's called Susie versus the dirty girls

round two As they've called her slots this feels

like something of a 1980s movie Which is not

a bad thing, but I love like I got something

I want to talk to you about your sluts And I

guess the head one goes excuse me and she goes

like that thing that when you touch yourself

underneath everything bleeds colors and you can

hear is that low rumbling sound that everybody's

frozen like what's up with that skanks and they

look at her and she's like, oh god, and she just

like runs away, but here's the thing though because

Susie's not wrong because Susie is asking the

right questions about her body She's trying to

fit in with society and it's like nobody wants

to give her one So they'll just make her an outcast

and then when she stands up for herself She runs

away, and I don't know they give her this look

the dirty girls, but they're not you know They

have these looks of oh my god. I can't believe

they said that to us, but It's strike one for

some reason and I don't know why because they're

not chasing her and I don't know Why she would

think they would be against her now? Or whatever

the case may be. That's why I was confused about

that panel Right. Yeah I think it's just a scene

of her running away. I mean, it's you know It's

one of those things where she just runs away

and they don't say you know they don't say anything

to her Because they don't know they probably

don't know what to say to her Yeah, and then

of course you've got the typical or stereotypical

Other outcast tough girl or tough guy that smokes

in school or this case. She's smoking in the

bathroom And I love, like, they're in the stall,

and adult Susie's in the other stall narrating

about how she's gonna learn about sexuality.

And this one's just smoking a cigarette, this

other tomboyish girl. And she's just showing

on the stalls on all the different positions.

And then gives Susie a cigarette. And I love

the look on Susie while she's inhaling the cigarette.

Like the three -second rule taco and Susie just

smoke it in her eyes and going. Oh my god while

she's looking at these images ET the sex movie

Yeah, I mean this this is and of course Susie

is starting to realize what her body is going

through and and She's smoking the cigarette while

watching all these different positions of people

having sex Which I don't think we really need

to go into but they're pretty no No, we're not.

Even though at the beginning of this episode,

I said the podcast is going to be a little bit

more explicit than normal. No, we're not. You

people need to pick up the trade. You can get

it digitally on Comixology, or you can get it

at your local comic shop or wherever you buy

comics. Yeah. All you need to know is that Susie's

being educated by these sketchings on the bathroom

stall. She's smoking a cigarette, but she's not

as ready as she thinks. And she runs out, and

she realizes she's not ready, which is fine.

But then she's talking to a gynecologist. And

this becomes strike two, because while she's

talking to the gynecologist, or he's examining

her, I guess because you know the way that he

he's got to go in there and check things out

she's We don't know she's getting into it or

not, but then she finally sits up, but on the

You know the bed, and she's like what happens

if you have an orgasm asking for a friend and

the doctor just stops for a minute and Nothing

the nurse like looks over the doctor, and we

can see like a breast like I don't know if that's

in her imagination. No, actually, I'm sorry.

That's Susie. Susie's the nurse. So Susie, the

nurse is not there. It's just Susie. But Susie's

asking the gynecologist what happens if they

have an orgasm. And the doctor just says, usually

fall asleep, Suzanne, with your husband. And

that's strike two for Suzanne. And then, of course,

she's at, I guess, a party or whatever. Well,

this is the party that we didn't mention this

earlier. This is the party that they had announced

earlier in the issue about saving the library

and the books. This is her book. This is one

of her book parties. Yeah, and she's asking,

I guess it's her mother. Because that's what

it looks like cuz you know somebody with alcohol

when we all the mothers turn to alcohol and of

course She's like I have a few questions like

you know sex questions and the mother goes great

now I'm raising a whore and we see you know another

adult Susie going strike three so she's back

in the tub as usual and Well, this is after the

party though. Yeah party already happened. She's

coming home like she's coming home so and then

this is kids Susie she came home from probably

the doctor maybe I don't remember off top my

head and so basically you know as you said we

go back to the tub and we go back to the quiet

place and and it's kind of interesting how they

show what's going on around her as time has stopped

Really I really do think that the scene with

her mother is kind of touching at the end even

though she kind of goes off on her Well, you

can't blame her. I mean we We don't know I mean

the father's thrown out of this building and

you know the mother's turned to alcohol and Susie

You know since she doesn't have an adult figure

or you know a parental figure in her life The

mother's turned to alcohol, Susie is trying to

discover herself and her body and discover but

discover where she could find her happy place

but she keeps saying in the quiet was the only

place I could talk to her for a couple years

after this even. I just scream until everything

stops hurting. So I'm guessing that after she

has an orgasm she has the confidence to talk

to her mother but then we just see how her mother

continues to drink and Susie just like I guess

in her imagination, smacking the bottles away,

but during orgasm, she's kissing her mother and

making everything better. Like in her mind, when

she's having an orgasm, she somehow is able to

bond with her alcoholic mother. Yep, and it's

somewhat strange, like when you're really like...

stop having fun and just think about that statement

that you just made that's a little strange but

it's again this is her way of coping with life

and that is interesting and we go on you know

she needs more data she needs to compile all

this stuff and she goes to the library and and

you know she asks the librarian about I have

a lot of information, but no good way of sorting

it all and searching through it and stuff library

says Taxonomy you need a taxonomy like the Dewey

decimal system. I Loved books, but it was the

day I fell in love with libraries And we go back

to adult Susie and you know she talks about you

know the bank for closing on the library and

and all this and all that and this is kind of

where we get back to the party um that's going

on currently um and this is where we meet john

and john is a secretary hey don't laugh i was

one for a while no no no like no i'm not laughing

because he's a secretary i'm laughing because

of how he deals with his like he's not ashamed

to Say that he is one because she says you sound

very secure in your masculinity Most guys would

say would say personal assistant right right?

Yeah, I'm a secretary And he says what about

you I throw parties to save libraries So these

two kind of hit it off and you know she goes

on to say that there were others and we see all

these other guys and even herself and and you

know as we go along and and go along oh my god

she now has a partner in the quiet place and

the best image out of the entire first issue

is the one where How are you? They both say,

how are you here? Yeah, I mean, this is something

that you want to make into a poster. I think

if any money shot for this comic right now, it's

this one right here with the two of them going,

how are you here with a little light? It almost

felt something of Ghostbusters with Dana and

Louis Tully for some reason. You know, like when

they were possessed. But like, did we do it with

Louis? No, it was like. Dana did we do it no

Louis we didn't that's what it kind of reminds

me of but at the end of the day It's smart because

now there are two misfits that are finding each

other and we learned about her and of course

we start to You know, they're kind of confused

about do they have the same power? How do they

get it? They're not too sure and then of course

we go back to the beginning where we get the

three but the guy with the black you know voice

balloon thing goes three like you're slowing

down and they're talking to each other like we're

here you okay yeah i'm okay everybody's okay

and they just walk out of the room closed with

guns and you know i guess we figured at this

point what about this is look okay to you like

they've done something and they've used their

orgasms to slow down time and that's the end

of the first book So all in all it's satisfactory

We get a confession out of her. We're starting

to get to know something about well We'll get

to know something about him, but all in all I

love the first book Absolutely love it I think

it's amazing. I think the only problem I have

well so far in the trade the only problem I have

is that the second issue come world COME world

yeah that is not a full image it's not a full

screen image it's just like the standard you

know cover which some of the other ones are full

images I don't know why this one doesn't take

up the full screen so issue two we start and

We see that they are surrounded. They are in

a bank and People are you know basically yelling

and screaming at them to you know come out with

your hands up and the police are here and everything

else and We see these these agents Who I don't

know what they look like in these white suits

I don't know what you would equate them to well

one looks like storm for some reason I guess

the head one looks like a kabuki and the other

one looks a little bit like you know Curly Joe

if he went to the gym or something or that guy

Kano from the venture brothers I'm sure we're

gonna get into them, but we do Understand now

that John and Susie when they orgasm they can

stop time They're robbing the bank and we know

why because she wants to save the library and

he wants to you know I guess make a better life

as well, but this one mainly deals with John

and how he discovered himself and This porn shop

come world where I can tell you right now folks.

I used to live in New York City It's Giuliani

pre Giuliani post Giuliani you know David Dinkins

mayor Koch you name it all three mayors Koch

Dinkins and Giuliani and I can tell you right

now I didn't explore the sex shops until I was

in my 20s. You walk in, you walk out. I mean,

this book got it right. They're not called Comeworld

or anything, if that's what you think. And they're

not as explicit. Even Hollywood will make them

explicit or whatever the case may be. No. If

you ever walk through what's left of the seedy

area of Times Square Manhattan, um, they would

look like a regular store they would they would

be called like adult world or something and Sometimes

if they needed business, they'd have you know,

like this middle eastern guy hand out some flyers

pretty much it's cut and dry with A poster saying,

you know adult books, you know 20 off of adult

dvds You wouldn't get too many of the you know

chains on the door or anything. There wouldn't

be a door They would probably advertise a peep

show here and there but other than that Yeah,

they're really they are dank they do have like

this cash register where the I don't know why

but the desk is like 20 feet tall for some reason

and You have a plethora of x -rated tapes. You

may have some boosts. I have not gone in I've

heard you know what a same sex people will go

into those but past all that I don't think this

is a smart thing for anyone to discover or ask

questions about sexuality Because if anything

this is what would turn somebody off to it because

if you go into any of these stores past getting

porno that's really terrible to watch in the

magazines They're not really helping you. They're

just it's exploitation. And I can understand

what this character is going through because

he doesn't understand sex and he figures, you

know, his friends are no help as we'll get into.

And it's just it's it's realistic in one side

and it's sad in the other. Absolutely. So we

see them in this bank As you kind of already

pointed out and we have the whole come world

scene, which is really interesting I Really got

a laugh at the ass Jeeves line. I thought that

was hilarious. Oh, I remember yeah Surprisingly

there was something like the ass Jeeves There's

I mean the internet still has like these free

porn sites every now and then they have something

like this Like the ass Jeeves I forget what it's

called But yeah, I mean John is doing his best

to try to find out about sex and he goes to the

library of all places And it's been blocked.

I'm surprised he got even you know that far with

the ass Jeeves web page, but he He's in the woods

with his friends. He comes across a bully and

John has found pornography and he's willing to

beat up the bully just to get his hands on that

porn magazine and Pretty much it as I said it

it goes back and forth about him going into that

store of him Like how he's ejaculated for the

first time, but what he did it's like The cum

came alive and he's trying to touch it like he

doesn't understand what it is You know to him

it could be ectoplasm as a kid He's not he's

not too sure what's going on with it. We can

see all like the timelines go around but Susie

she knows what it is and she just calls it the

quiet and she goes that's what you do when you

call it and John is is trying to describe his

orgasms and I also love the fact how he says

that when he orgasms, it's like, she's like,

oh, it glows like ET, like ET's dick. And he's

like, no, see, yeah. They're trying to have an

understanding of them both discovering the sexuality

because they're both used to masturbating and

they're not used to sharing. you know, an orgasm

at the same time, and they're doing their best

to try to figure out what they're doing right

and what they're doing wrong. And Susie, I think,

is getting into it a lot more than he is. It's

like, we see these images where she keeps trying

to get on top of him, and we can see him biting

his lip, and he's just, like, saying one -letter

words, you know, like, F, and then nothing at

all. And she's just disappointed. That she's

able to come and he can't and you know, he accidentally

kicks her off the bed and she's ready to go again

And yeah, then we we keep going back and forth

to come world. In fact, there's one point where

he treats it as a board game I love I do love

that image where he he thinks of it more as like

and he wants to play benny hill music because

he is under age while going through the store

and It does, like I said, it does feel like something

like out of chutes and ladders. Yeah, it is so

amazing. And as she, you know, as they go along

and, you know, they're not necessarily living

together, but they're, you know, he's cooking

at her place and she's researching his favorite

internet star and all of a sudden the laptop

comes to life. It's like, well, really? Seriously?

Like, how could that ever work? But it does.

I mean this second issue just like the first

one is very very fun very interesting by close

to the end we come back to the bank stuff and

you know the woman calling them children and

them trying to figure out how they're going to

escape and it kind of ends on She says Johnny

think about it. We'll slip out the back. We can

beat her we can get away and He says too late,

and that's where it ends We then overall what

did you think of the second issue you see here's

what I like because it is more realistic version

of American Pie for John and I love how he has

his friends trying to figure out about sex and

again realistically around that age between 11

and 12 I had kids well I had kids I had friends

like yeah right I had kids good night you know

I live in Staten Island for a while and I was

in the suburbs but we were near an area called

Marron's Harbor where there are a lot of ghetto

kids and What happened was is that sometimes

you would hang around the bad kids because, you

know, that's just the way it started to become

in Staten Island where they started to come into

our area for whatever reason. And when they started

talking about sex, you had to pretend you knew

something, otherwise they would pound on you.

And the problem is that when I would hang out

with my regular friends and we got bored, my

friends would find... An x -ray to tape of their

parents or they'd find a magazine and we didn't

know what really to think of it You know, like

as I said a lot of comedies in the 80s and 90s

They make it into a big deal We looked at it

for a couple pages and like this is the big deal

and you know That's what our 11 and 12 year olds

thought and we still go back and watch real Ghostbusters

or something, you know, we didn't really think

of Sex until probably 17 18 being a late boomer

for us was not that big of a deal and anyone

who did talk about it well you know they dropped

out of school and you know they are the ones

who had kids but I mean I never really came across

a bully to fight over a porn magazine my father

who eventually became a principal of a high school

decided that he confiscated a playboy from a

student and he brought it home he showed it to

me like I was 15 16 and I looked at it And I

was like, okay, I get it, but, you know, as I

said, he was a workaholic and he did joke about

sex. You know, he's almost like, oh god, Jim's

dad from, Eugene Levy from American Pie. But

past all that, the stuff that John does is relatable

and it's enjoyable and anyone male at a young

age who masturbated and ejaculated and didn't

understand with erections and ejaculation and

orgasms and coming. Yeah, it works. And then

when you're trying to share that with somebody

else and, you know, they're joking about it because

they're more experienced than you. I love this

entire issue, how he's trying to share, you know,

have sex with Suzanne and vice versa. It's fun.

It's relatable and It's also, again, great issue.

Issue number three, my sexual errors and misfortunes,

2001 to present. We get, of course, I guess,

you know, mysterious lady or the Oracle from

The Matrix, whatever you want to call her, seeing

and John and Susanna trapped in the bank vault

figuring out how they're going to get out because

they, of course, The these three people who are

calling John and Suzanne children are not affected

by the time lapse. So Susan just seems to go

back to, I guess, college or whatever, the same

as John. And they're just, you know, think. And

of course, we get the shadow guy who sings. Well,

the yeah, this is a little interesting. You know.

Uh, so we're... Yeah, yeah, yeah, Esteban. It's

not... The cock blocker is the only thing you

can do with this guy. Um, it pretty much just

deals with them trying to figure out their relationship

and what they're like, but they're not gonna

have an orgasm. It's not a boring issue. It's

just no not at all it This entire these first

five issues are very immersive very interesting

Like I didn't some trades I have to stop and

step away for a little while I Read this trade

in like an hour and a half or less. It is that

fun. It is that fast -paced moving You know,

it's not so fast pace where you have to try to

keep up with it, but It's so fast -paced where

it's like, I started the third issue, next thing

I know, in what seemed like 20 seconds or less,

I'm at the fourth issue, and it's like, whoa,

wait, what? Already? Because it's so fun, and

it's so interesting. So we get them back at their

dorm place, and they go and do the whole sexual

act. And we then go through John's... past and

his sexual partners and Some of this stuff is

amazing, you know Just some of the things that

he says It was always wrong with one and never

It was always wrong with me and never Kara with

a C or Kara with a K Jen Beth Betty never Beth

and Liz Amanda with the weird periods who had

to change her name That chick looks mean Brenda

Gia who almost killed me George whoa wait what?

Guy named George you know any girls named George

yeah once in fact I did well no this wasn't her

this was a guy named George Wow wow you slept

with a guy yeah well I'm not gay as going as

a going concern I just You just fucked dudes.

Well, dude, and what? I was looking. Well, you

know, in college you either experiment with your

sexuality or substance abuse stuff. And for John

to experiment with his sexuality, I... who didn't

back then in college or but the point being is

that I love the fact how they're starting to

bond and I love the fact how they're realizing

that they have more to offer than just I mean

they're talking about the sex lives but they're

having fun with it and she's not judging herself

and I learned she's not judging him either that's

the you know she's not judging herself but she's

not judging him either and vice versa yeah and

I love the fact that they're trying to talk about

their powers And I love the fact how, you know,

even Esteban is trying to come in and break up

whatever he's trying to sing. He is still trying

to form a regular rational relationship. He does

not think of her as a sex slave and vice versa.

And they consider it a first date. And he, you

know, at first Guess they're talking for like

a day or so cuz like it's it's been the 55th

hour. She's like it was a hell of a first date

and I Guess they're going to exchange information,

but we're not too sure if she's gonna text him

or not and she's upset No, it's she's not sure

if he's going to text her. Oh, that's always

the case. I think she's she's You know cuz he

goes you know what but this is so cool though

because this Their meeting happened at this that

this party for the library and you know the the

panel before she asks him to stay He basically

says, you know, I was mentioning earlier before

we get to the Esteban thing the the the panel

where Where he says well, dude and and what I

was looking for people like me like us and then

we have this giant part of the panel where where

he says that and he's still talking and she says

you know what she says and uh you see all the

naked people like surrounding the table behind

them and so we we get to the point where she

says you know hey why don't you stay and he says

uh no i mean no thank you i've looked for you

every day of my life or since i was what 13 fuck

whatever it was and Susie, I'm worried that if

I don't go home tonight, I'm never ever going

to go home again So that's when he leaves and

you know She closes the door says he gets home

goes to bed. Oi gets up You know goes into work

and we see him go into the men's room and do

all that and he's doing going into the men's

room to masturbate instead of actually doing

what you're supposed to do in the men's room

because he doesn't like his boss and he has been

shitting in his boss's plant. Yeah, I love that.

I mean, these are some great images and I love

the montage where he goes to masturbate to slow

down time and you see the person on the walker.

I guess it must be ironic anyway because whether

time slows down or not, this person is still

going to take the time to walk. But I love how

he's going to slow down time, shit in the plant.

He's reading a book while doing it. And he's

like, fuck you, sir. And fuck this bank, sir.

OK. And then she, Susie, is pretty much at the

library. just bored out of her mind because or

also look at the phone wait for john to call

her yeah she's still waiting for him to call

or text and we see her in bed still waiting and

waiting and waiting and it happens and she screams

and you know this is again this is one of the

cool things about this book how the text messages

are perceived because you know he says hey We

then cut to the panel where it's like in in the

guided -view technology they show His phone or

her phone I should say You know her phone Because

on the left -hand side of the of the panel and

then her laying in bed And it shows this like

blue line like it like like the text message

just flew into her window. Oh, yeah I absolutely

love that way of them, you know, of Chip showing

the art of connecting between the phones. And

actually that was his phone to hers, I believe,

because how I can tell the difference is on the

first one here it says, you know... Mr. Come

World Ugg at the very top it says Mr. Come World

Ugg and then later as we go along on her phone

it says Suzy with an I and an E so you know they

go back and forth and start texting and texting

and they text for god a couple of days until

they meet up again no I almost to use a Sexual

joke here. I almost blew my wad talking in issue

two because when they were in When he was talking

about come world beforehand when they were in

the quiet place You know she I Thought they were

gonna show the shelves and he actually takes

her there Come to find out, you know, he has

turned into come worlds, you know most loyal

customer And we see some of the sections in this

adult video store. One of them says medium core.

I kind of laughed at that. Another of them says

electrical, feather, tickle, whatever it is in

the background. At the very bottom of this panel

on this page it says Obama core. Obamacore medical

and socialist themed I I just can't even I laughed

but oh my god, I can't even imagine that So that

was hilarious so they go into the booth which

John isn't Isn't too thrilled on and he's like,

oh this is expensive and You know we you know

she wants to experience this with him, and you

know they go into the quiet and They do all kinds

of stuff in the store And they basically realize

that with these powers and the you know the power

to freeze time together They can do and basically

get away with anything that they want to so they

go around and mess up the store and put masks

on and goggles and all kinds of things and Do

kind of fun stuff there? You know They then go

to that this is not in the quiet side anymore

they You know they go to some bar some pool hall

And she you know, they're they're talking and

she's like are you gonna do this or are you gonna

Are you just gonna stare at the balls all night?

He's like, all right. All right, and you know,

she hears music and Turn around. Oh shit. This

is my jam Now this might be the best part of

this entire trade They actually did this in the

single issues and they carried it over here to

the trade We have She starts singing this song.

We don't know what it is Well, it it says what

it is. But at first just from the panel where

it's like, it's my jam we don't see it but They

do this post -it note thing, so this is Matt

Fraction talking to us the readers directly outside

of the story. So here Suzy starts singing Fat

Bottomed Girls by Queen. Legally though, that

was an issue. Yeah. This is so amazing. Yeah,

they is almost something like out of Scott Pilgrim

versus the world where, you know, Scott's sister's

friend is cursing at him, but they put a black

box over her. So even though they're bleeping

her out, they're putting the black box so that

you can't see the lips move. So this way they

can lower the rating. But this one is even better

because they're putting a post that. box over

the balloons as you can't sing and he's explained

to us why because they couldn't get the rights

in time it didn't work out we we tried to get

the rights in the lyrics for the original comic

we just couldn't get the worked out on time and

she tried to get them for the trade but it still

didn't work out on time or you know you know

the lawyers or whatever and that was Again this

comic may be about sex and crime But just that

is so many aspects of this series already. We're

only three issues in folks and It's just pure

Unadulterated fun it is and it's tongue -in -cheek

and it works Even though they couldn't get the

rights and they still make it work And I and

I love how There's one panel where it says that

we almost arrest poor Brian May at this point

and You know anyway, so Freddie Mercury hub best

pipes ever Would have been fun. Oh, well. I always

wanted to shoot a real musical number, but back

when I made videos and stuff and we just see

but it you know the joke still works and They

fall in love with each other and they understand

that You know she needs the money to support

the library and and they figure they'll use their

powers to help each other But then of course

we're back to the vault again where we have I

guess You know the the three matrix guys whatever

you want to call them, and it's about to hit

him what John looks like is about to hit one,

but the other guy hits John and John is laying

his blood and Guess with issue four we find out

there the sex police Mm -hmm. Yeah, there's a

sex police which done done done and well, that's

how that's how issue three ends She the you know

the one guy hits John And then she says you tow

her in my world now and my world hurts And that's

how it ends for issue 3 and then issue 4 is the

sex police and we pick right back up And John

says I swear to God you hit me again man, and

I will break your fucking jaw No, man. I'm just

fucking with you, but seriously don't hit me

again And the police lady says, goes on to say,

I suppose some sort of kudo is in order for you

both. Many people like us have of course chosen

to break the law, but you, you're the first who

have actually ever worked together. I suppose

you think you're very clever. Um, I have a question.

What kind of police get to carry that? Yeah Yeah,

she's like shut up. Don't speak to them Yeah,

yes, they run into the sex police which I you

know For this kind of soft core porn or whatever

you want to call it is probably the most inventive

character I can think of the sex police But then

she finds out that one of them is just a bus

driver that they're not real cops That's why

I go question mark because I'm doing this for

the people that have not picked up this book

and for me I still got a little confused, but

there they are something because they are Overpowered

by when John and Suzy have this orgasm, but they're

able to get away and because they go they're

not real cops and then of course they're I guess

we see a flashback again back at the apartment

on how to save the library which is fine and

they're debating of you know what did the whole

issue and right and wrong is and you know she

has the poster about saving the books and again

support your local library I'm all about digital

media and digital print but still not everything

for some reason is able to be made into digital

print. And the library is still good because

it's still about socialization. You still have

these free workshops. So I can understand what

Susie is trying to do, and I can understand what

John is trying to do. And they're doing it for

a good cause, but since this is technically also

about sex, they are starting to find things in

common that it's not just about the sex, it's

about their interests. And they will meet again.

and you know John is saying how he's never had

sex outside you know because they're in a car

and he's just like except for like peeing in

the woods when I was a kid I don't know if anyone's

ever seen my junk and you know Susie's okay with

it so they're in a car and I guess she's ready

to you know do it in a car with him they're back

in come world where they're just like destroying

all the merchandise and they're Seeing like the

aftermath of people going insane, but they're

still debating on the issues of right and wrong

and Right. I also love for some reason with Susie

or adult Susie dresses the hamburger because

she's like You know imagine imagine She had a

family life a real life like I guess she's going

back to the mother You know probably has to do

mom shit to do but then suddenly It could be

like her secret identity like Susie's dressed

up as the Hamburglar because she thinks she has

a secret identity and because she's about ready

you know discuss with John about robbing the

bank and she's hoping her mother had a secret

identity but Susie pretty much knows that robbing

the bank to save the library is the only way

you know she's run out of ideas and she figures

well with her and John together what could go

wrong And that's when the sex police are coming

in and they're trying to interrogate everything

that John and Susie has done up until this point.

Nobody understands what's going on. You know,

nobody understands what the sex police are taking

out with their phones and their scanning. And,

you know, the head sex police officer leaves,

this phone number goes like, it's me. There's

two of them. Meet me tonight at Danny's. No more

9 30 my kids won't be sleeping till then and

then it's taco night so I love that humor and

of course we're seeing the flashbacks of Susie

and John texting each other John shitting in

the plant but we see them having dinner we see

them you know Susie using the powers of orgasm

to go into the zoo and pet live tigers And well,

he asks her this is part of their discussion.

He asks her haven't you ever used it for anything?

Oh Yeah, anything else, you know, yeah, you know

anything else than just coming to The quiet place

and you know, that's what he asks her and this

is where the Tigers come in where she she tells

him about You know what? She's also used it for

and that brings us to her story of the You know

Susie versus Jeff You know and that starts that

whole story and you know basically Jeff dumped

because we find out that the girl in in middle

school high school that called her You know said

hey slut turns out to be Rachel her current best

friend roommate etc etc So apparently Jeff broke

Rachel's heart and Susie is going to get even

with him and she goes masturbates and you know

takes a hold of she says I availed myself of

Rach's stash she was so wretched by then she

didn't notice hey pointer for all you kids out

there if rubbing one out puts you into a state

of frozen time maybe don't get high down in it

yeah because she says Weed shouldn't even work

like that. I don't know. All that was left to

get back to my seat without falling on my ass.

But my estimate this took a half hour. Then all

I had to do was sit back zzzz and we see a what

the hell and there's a flaming pile of stuff

in his bag. They revoked his scholarship and

you know she basically got revenge for Rachel.

And that's where we get back to the bank. What

what did you think of the Suzy versus Jeff? Well,

I thought it was interesting because we're seeing

some more tent, you know, like tension between

the two But we're also seeing like what they

would do with their powers besides just you know

What what they do in the quiet? So I do I did

like this montage III especially I'm trying to

figure what music would go with it But I especially

love what she does to get back with Jeff. I mean,

I love the fact that she literally destroys this

guy's life and the fact that Rachel will become

her BFF. I mean, they were enemies. They became

friends. It makes the most sense, I feel, because

Susie is standing up for herself in a way. But

the montages for me work. The destroying of Jeff's

life works. And I think. we're starting to get

a little bit more about the sex police because

one of them just seems to be a receptionist and

You know she's taking down calls and then all

of a sudden You know we have this person who?

He says I don't know I need to tell anybody this

but I think my new roommates new boyfriend has

gotten herself into having sex in public and

now they're planning to rob a bank and We see

how this person is starting to turn to the sex

police. Yeah, and I don't particularly like this.

This is the one thing that I know Rach is just

looking out for her, but like as we're going

through this trade, ladies and gentlemen, as

we're talking this through, I'm having a major

sense of deja vu. That sadly involves the adult

Anakin Skywalker. And no, I'm not talking about

James Earl Jones. Oh. Because this entire comic

reminds me of the film Jumper. Oh, I was going

to say that, but you know what? It is Jumper.

But on the other hand, I think it's Jumper with

a better cast of characters. Oh, no, no, no.

Yeah, I know. I understand that. But I'm just

saying, like. The you know Obviously if you haven't

seen jumper ladies and gentlemen basically what

happens is there are jumpers all over the world

that can jump from place to place to place to

place to place It's similar to the slowdown of

I guess technically this would be a crossover

between sex criminals, the way that the time

stopping works and the way that, you know, everything

else works in it and how it has the sex police.

That's really the part that I think is from Jumper.

The rest of it is basically clock stoppers for

adults. With the 2002 movie Clock Stoppers with

French Stewart and... Oh, God, what's that kid's

name? Jesse Bradford, I think. Oh, yeah, but...

Good yeah, I agree with you, but as I said This

is better. I'm not saying that I'm just I'm just

making you know right allusions to things that

as I'm going through this and we're discussing

and I'm like hey I've seen this before but this

is done in a very refreshing light because it's

new characters. It's new situations It's really

really interesting. Well could be you know the

only thing that would cause a monkey wrench if

Samuel Jackson was in it but I don't know there's

always a catch but yeah we get to the final issue

now going down and I guess they're like the tied

up with their you know because they've also mentioned

that the cars aren't affected by the quiet and

I guess they were in a trunk somewhere of a van

or they're they're in the back of a van is what

I perceive yeah they're in the back of a van

and pretty much the sex police you know claims

that they're a prisoner of the sex police and

you know they've been intercepted by using an

act of committing numerous crimes which of course

you know beyond laws and she's claimed they're

two fucking morons because you know they're they're

trying not to get caught but they abuse their

power so to speak and somehow We get we think

they're gonna get away because it's gonna be

something of a Batman comic where their hands

are tied and they're gonna find a way to get

out But we get to another flashback where we're

not really a flashback. It's like Well, it's

sort of because she's trying to get out and she's

cuffed and we see her cuffed at the bed and he's

and John has all these toys and he's kind of

wearing a spider -man costume and He's calling

himself James bondage. Yeah, you've jumped into

this is issue five ladies and gentlemen. Yes,

it's Going down. Yeah But yeah, I mean I don't

know. That's one of the weird things in this.

I don't know why he's in a half Spidey costume.

That's a little strange. I mean, it doesn't bother

me, but it just seems a little strange. They're

roleplaying and they're trying fetishes. I mean,

here's the thing too. Fetishes have always been

how desperate are you if you can't do, you know,

missionary, which is fine. But fetishes are not

for everybody if you don't know how to do them.

I mean he's just up a spider -man He's reading

from a script calling himself James bondage and

she's tied up on the bed With an apron saying

kiss the cook and they just can't seem to get

no. It doesn't say kiss the cook Oh kiss the

cock You know why stop now we're trying to keep

this cleaned up. Yeah, you're right I didn't

say what it said. I just said that it doesn't

say kiss the cook You know what kids you knew

the discretion on this one, but yeah, I mean

they're trying their best to spice up their sex

life and He's trying his best and it's not working.

They're trying the best to have sex outdoors

and that's not working and they don't know where

to go or how to plan this and They're freezing

time But somehow I guess she comes in where he

sees him shitting in the plant again Well, this

is the first time she's seen it they've they've

had let's see here. Where is it? Okay, so the

last part in real time was an out -the -front

door we just fill one like Jim Bagworth and wham

bam thank you bank uh we then go she says it

was that whole thing that was starting to feel

haunting like we were being watched um and i

think this is what's her name um i i don't know

somehow this is what's her name or they they

it didn't show them having sex because the the

the agent is also in in this because that because

they're in the police station or they're no they're

in the bank that's what it is and and the agent

is in the bank and so this is I'm starting to

get creeped out and she's looking for John and

then all of a sudden she sees him shitting in

the plant because John actually works at the

bank so then we get to what the fuck and he goes

to explain all of this and And we go back to,

you know, we get to John, you know, he basically

says, let me tell you about this asshole I worked

for. Okay, if I tell you about him, you'll totally

understand everything. And he goes to tell her

about him and, you know, he, you know, checks

the stall. He goes into the bathroom and checks

the stall, but I don't know why the ladies would

be, unless this is part of his fantasy. I think

it's part of his fantasy and I think it's also

that the sex police, from what I understand,

is that the captain of the sex police or whatever

you want to call her, knows that they've been

having sex and using their powers to abuse time.

not just abuse themselves. And she kind of uses

her powers to step in and alter their reality.

I think that's why she's able to see them because

there's a panel where she's controlling Susie

and that's how Susie sees him shit in the plant

and how John is talking about his boss goes in

the stall and sees all these women and then it

goes back to them, you know, in bed talking about

the sex life, being in a diner. And she's saying,

are we clear? She's letting them go, but she's

letting them off with a warning that she's watching

what they're doing. And, you know, they say that

she has kegel face. And, yeah, you know, they

were kegels. So pretty much the sex police can

watch whatever they do. Mm -hmm. I think the

funniest thing about this entire scene is the

fact that the boss put up a Wanted poster for

the most disgusting human being ever somebody

in her office has been defecating in the plant

of our kind and considerate boss Mr. Shank worth

like mr. Shank worth the plant has done nothing

to deserve such abhorment treatment There will

be a reward for any information which leads to

the fingering, the culprit, and the ceasing of

the defection or the defecation. Please contact

Mr. Shankworth's assistant, John, at extension

2435. So, it's just hilarious to me. I think

that this also reminds me of something out of

John Waters. I don't know if you've ever watched

his early films. You gotta get your hands on

the poor white trash movies. They're out there.

Pink flamingos, multiple maniacs, polyester,

and, you know, desperate living. Because it deals

with people in Baltimore with just wanting to

perform these really bizarre acts. And, you know,

pink flamingos deals with who are the filthiest

people alive. And you have Divine, and you have

our son, Crackers, and their traveling companion,

Cotton, against the Marbles. And the Marbles

are kidnapping hitchhikers and forcing them to

have sex with their butler. And they're selling

the babies to lesbian couples. So Pink Flamingos

is probably one of the best John Waters movies

I've ever seen, his early ones. I mean, he eventually

made Hairspray and Crybaby. And then he tried

to go back to being filthy again, but it didn't

work in the 90s. So you get the idea here. I

guess it kind of pays homage to it. But we know

that these, you know, John, Susie, aren't dirty.

They're just trying to use their powers for good.

And we see what I guess what the keg was like

in her human form. And she is trying to talk

to Rachel. And the Kegels family, she has these

twins that are just, you know, obnoxious and

she can't deal with them. Susie, of course, is

back at her library trying to do whatever research

she can and trying to save the library or, you

know, reestablish her relationship with John

and. Of course we have the kegel that she's like

she wants to report a bank robbery because But

she ends up saying yeah, Bobby. It's me and they're

at bank Corp and We have the sex police again,

I guess they're going backwards of how John and

Susie they're going backwards and finding out

their past crimes that they've done, right? What

I got out of it because they're kind of rewinding

time as well Right, right, right, right and we

see them at Bancor and then we get back to the

present and and She says so now then where were

we? Oh, right. We're being kidnapped by the Ku

Fox clan God that's so is just so funny And we

find, you know, they keep saying that the gun

that John had isn't a gun. You know, even though

it looks like a gun, and it has a trigger like

a gun, and it has a barrel like a gun, and it

has a grip like, it's not a gun. Yeah. It's not

even a real gun. Yeah. That's not a knife. This

is a knife. Yeah, I mean, we don't... We don't

really know what the sex police really want if

they're upset about how John and Susie are abusing

their sex powers and committing the crime. All

we know is that they also have the power to reverse

time too, but John and Susie apparently are able

to get away this time, or how many times they've

tried to do it. And it does leave on a cliffhanger

because now they're wanted criminals. Now they're

wanted criminals, you're right. But she takes

the agent's phone. They want to find out about

themselves. And the last line, you know, our

worlds had just gotten bigger and smaller at

the same time. So we ran like a couple of goddamn

criminals. And that's how issue five and the

trade ends. And then we see a page in the trade,

Matt and Chip's ultimate sex moves, our master

list of what did and didn't make the cut in the

washroom stall. There are just too many and you

really don't want to know them, kid. No, okay.

Again, like we said, we were not going to reveal

the moves that are done that, that, um, um, Rachel

shows Susie in the in the bathroom. You need

to pick the trade up and see it for yourself

We then have Barton rethink in issue 3 Susie

and John partake in the viewing of an erotic

film entitled Hard on Fink. Matt, being a fan

of its non -erotic spoof, Barton Fink, had a

few more dialogue options to use for the scene.

Here's what did not make the cut." So they're

doing kind of like outtake things, and this isn't

even Susie and John, it's just the film thing.

So that's kind of cool. I really do like that.

Again, it just goes to show you like, I almost,

even though I bought this digitally, and even

though I've already read volume one, I almost

want to pick this up in physical trade form.

It's that damn good. We have the next page here

in the trade is Steaming Radio. While promoting

the first issue of Sex Criminals, Matt and Chip

created an original radio erotic drama for the

literary website Hazlet. This is it, I guess.

So that's another interesting thing with the

trade, and it is about two full pages. You know,

they then go through making sausage and how they

did the script, the layouts and the pencils,

as well as the inks, the colors, the quiet. lettering

and edits. It's basically just a behind -the

-scenes look at making the comic. We see a photo

swap and then we get into the cover gallery.

Their fourth printing of the book actually has

the two of them on the cover holding a cover

of issue one, because it is a fourth printing

of issue one. So I thought that was kind of cool,

and we see other random covers, and I really,

really like the Image Expo, or it actually says

the Image Sexpo variant. I think I like that

cover the best out of the variant covers. That

and the Time Magazine one. And I believe this

was on the cover of Time Magazine at one point.

I know that this was talked about. It is a popular

graphic novel. Oh, absolutely. It's gotten praise.

I mean, you know what I'm going to rate this.

Well, you know, I think we all know what we're

going to rate this. I'm just trying to see here

really quick if it really was. Top Ten Comics

and Graphic Novels Entertainment Time. Let's

see here. Yeah, there's an article that was posted

December 4th of 2013 where sex criminals got

number one out of the top ten. um... so that's

that's cool uh... but you know i wasn't sure

how i was gonna feel about this uh... it's really

really fun uh... a uh... third printing of issue

three has a cover of uh... of the classic queen

one of the classic queen images that was kinda

cool uh... and it's just You know, some really,

really fun stuff. Absolutely love it. We're gonna

take another quick break here. We're gonna come

back with final thoughts and ratings after this.

Hey Geekcast listeners! Do you ever listen to

Punisher Body Count and think to yourself, this

show would be awesome if it had less toilet humor

and was not about the Punisher? If so, join me,

Emily Williams, as I class up the Punisher guys

on Dane and Jake at Classy. We're like the Oprah

Book Club of comics. You'll hear us discuss famous

works like The Dark Knight Returns and The Grove,

along with graphic novels no one else is talking

about, like Blue Monday and Blankets. You can

find us at danandjake at classy .wordpress .com

or on iTunes. Alright folks, we are back here

inside the pull bag. Sex Criminals Volume 1,

Collecting Issues 1 -5, One Weird Trick. Absolutely

loved it. Every single piece of writing in this

is great. The art is amazing. I wish The Quiet

would be just one entire issue. I know they have

to not always be in there, but like the art on

The Quiet, it's what I love about certain comics.

It's nice and glossy and shiny and new and everything

else, and it's really, really awesome. The art

on a whole outside of The Quiett is good as well.

I really love the character designs by Chip.

And Fraction's writing, like I said in the beginning

of the podcast, the only other Fraction stuff

I've read is Hawkeye. The only reason why I don't

like Hawkeye, ladies and gentlemen, is that it's

basically Hawkeye's adventures on his days off.

Like I want to see Hawkeye kicking ass with the

Avengers. I don't want to I don't want to know

what he does in his days off But after reading

this I am a sex criminal fan of fraction because

it's just amazing I I know I had a few nitpicks

and a few missteps in misunderstanding a couple

of panels, but overall this gets five stars I

mean, this is just an amazing fun ride I give

this one a solid five out of five. I mean, there

are some images that you really want to hang

up on your wall. It shows that sex is not as

dirty as you think. It shows how people discover

sex when mom and dad aren't a road map and you

don't know who to ask and who you want to turn

to and who you want to trust. I wish the sex

police would get out of their way, but past all

that... Each issue has a memorable image that

I want like John running through come world like

you know shoots and ladders or you know Susie

in the tub Waking up in the tub after she's achieved

orgasm even when John comes and he's touching

it for the first time It doesn't understand what

it is. It's just a great book. We can depict

every panel by it You will not have buyer's remorse

with this one Yeah, I mean ladies and gentlemen

if you are open -minded to reading a really fun

story based around sexual activity Get this book

Seriously, just go get it The next trade volume

two Comes out in January of next year. So sometime

in January. That's when we'll talk about sex

criminals again here inside the pull bag Where

can the people find you online sir? Oh, of course

at geek cast radio comm syndicated shows Facebook

comm Hunnic outcast podcast and finally all one

word Hunnic outcast on Spreaker stitcher Twitter

stumble upon SoundCloud and tune in radio and

iTunes of course You can find me at TFGOMike

on Twitter, follow at GeekCastRadio on Twitter

as well, go to Facebook .com slash GeekCastRadio

network, obviously GeekCastRadio .com. Coming

up next, we've got issue or episode 97 where

Nicole Hailstone and I are going to be talking

about More Than Meets the Eye, Transformers More

Than Meets the Eye issues 28 and 29, and then

coming up in December, episode 98 will be Angel's

Smile Time from IDW. Episode 99 will be Steve

Megatron and I talking about Batman Beyond, 10

,000 Clowns, and Batgirl Beyond, and then we

will have the two of us back, Jeremy and I, for

the final episodes of 2014. I was going to do

some sort of countdown for the pull bag this

year, but I just kind of lost the idea of how

to do it. uh... so the final two weeks uh...

for christmas and new years uh... you're going

to get uh... uh... to back issue classics episodes

one in week three we're going to talk about avengers

and x -men access issues two through nine those

we will have bullet points for we are not going

through all seven issues like we have done here

uh... and then week four is going to be the uh...

tie -in series avengers and x -men access revolutions

I don't know, I'm kind of interested in that.

It's only four issues, so that'll be the end

of the year for the pull bag. Coming up January,

I'm not sure what we're gonna do yet. January

week one so far will be episode 100. Not sure

what's gonna happen with that. But it's gonna

be interesting. I'll say that. I've got a few

things that we could... Probably do, but just

not ready to reveal those just yet. So join us

next week when we talk about Transformers More

Than Meets the Eye issues 28 -29 with Nicole

Halestorm and I. Make it your greatest game in

the comics and we will catch you next time. You

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