March Badness

Hi, this is Dan Gilbazan, and you're listening

to the Geekcast Radio Network. This Themistocles

has shown himself to be quite brilliant in battle.

Which is more than I can say for any of you.

Do you gentlemen find my command unreasonable?

Is it too much to ask for victory? For though

I stand among ten thousand... I am alone. I longed

for a soul who would stand by my side, who I

could trust. Tell me, General Khashoggi, are

you that man? You will taste your victory by

the day's end. I will make certain of it. I hope

so. You are now on the inside of what I like

to call the circle Trust. We are all connected

in a great circle of life. You know something,

Bert? What? I think you and I are going in circles.

It feels like we're going in circles. The circle

is now complete. When I left you, I was about

to learn you now. This is Greg. This is Chuck.

And this is Dan. And we are Talking in Circles,

brought to you by the GeekCast Radio Network.

The podcast where we prove you always know what

you're getting when you get a box of chocolates

because it says right on a box. Forrest Gump

is living a lie. How's the week been going for

you guys? Pretty good. have an interesting week.

I went to a auction last weekend and there were

some comic books there and I kind of had hopes

of getting some good deals on some older stuff.

They had some old Avenger stuff and some X -Men

stuff but they ended up going too high because

you know people see comic books and they immediately

think they're worth like hundreds of dollars.

The funniest part of that of that trip was You

know when you're at like a Comic Con or something

like that, you're trying to look through comics

and there's like this teenager next to you that

hasn't showered in like a week and they just

smell so bad. Yeah, like every convention experience.

Yeah, like everyone ever and about 40 % of the

people there. You mean the guy with the colander

on his head when we were at the Baltimore Count

in the past by? Yeah, that was bad. But I think

I have one that tops that. There are also some

trains at this, some like model trains at this

auction and stuff. And I'm looking through a

box of comics and all of a sudden this like stench

wave like comes over me and there's this guy

standing next to me looking at trains. There's

visible lines. There was. He had like his own

like EM field surrounding him or something. He

looked like Pigpen from Peanuts. He really did.

But I mean, this guy had no excuse. to be like

a teenager that doesn't shower or something.

This guy was like a 70 year old man, fully mentally

capable and everything. He was just like a slob.

Like he had like a filthy coat and clothes and

everything. And he honestly smelled like he has

not showered in a month. And it was just so bad.

And I kept avoiding him the whole day. But and

I kind of found out by walking by him a few times

that he actually had a stink radius. that you

could, like, sense? Did you get out, like, rulers

and grass? Like, here's the epicenter of the

disaster. By my estimations, he had about a 15

-foot stink radius. So as long as you stayed

beyond that, you're okay. But, um, oh dear lord,

that man's stuck so bad. 15 feet around the guy.

That's how Chuck figured it out. I put the yellow

caution tape around them and stuff like that.

But yeah, that's my funny story for the week.

How's your week been going, Greg? Pretty good.

Went on a class field trip to a science museum,

and I got bit by a spider. It was really weird,

and I'm feeling kind of sick right now, so I'm

not sure how that's going to turn out. Interesting.

Stay away from subways, because then everyone

can happen. How's your day feel about it? Uh,

she doesn't really know. Uh, I don't want to

worry her though. Tell your uncle Ben that you

love him. Okay, why? What doesn't happen to Uncle

Ben? Nothing, nothing. He comes up with a really

good rice. Oh, okay, good. So we're going to

be rich, all right. Yeah, good luck with that.

It'll all... I just can't be worried with how

you said that. Yeah. And remember, with great

money comes no responsibility. Anyways, my week

has been fine actually it's been rather uneventful.

They have nothing really to say. It's just been

rather busy and whatnot So yeah, so my week's

been pretty pretty pretty blah. I guess nothing

bad happened. So that's a good thing anyways

for you guys out all there we are talking in

circles and We beginning to podcast with like

a roundabout discussion of what we've been up

to recently and then for a second segment We

have a special different game or something. We

like to play I'm pretty sure everyone out there

knows it's March Madness. Basketball is kind

of in the air, a lot of people doing their brackets

and all that stuff. I mean people that know nothing

about basketball are trying to win a billion

dollars. I filled out my bracket and I don't

think I got a game right yet. I just know nothing

about college basketball. I kind of know, I get

a feeling of how people feel when they do their

Oscar ballots because I'm like, I have, I don't

know. North Carolina is good, right? I heard

good things. but about the yankees yeah i was

like looking for jordan's team he wasn't there

i don't know in the spirit of that we of course

going to take that idea steal it and kind of

geekify it a little bit and we're going to be

doing but a bracket of who is the biggest badass

in all of kind of pop culture land from movies

to celebrities to comic books to television shows

a little bit of everything and it's going to

be kind of fun well Reveal the people who are

in it as we go. We're gonna do the first round

this episode So it'll be 32 matchups and then

we'll finish it next week. So we'll see how that

goes I'm sure it'll bring a lot of lively discussion

a lot of lively lively debate on You know how

right we are how wrong we are who we didn't include

and who we didn't but it's all good fun So we

did we did not include Kim Kardashian. I'm sorry.

No, no Yes, yes, it's been very naughty is what

you're trying to say. Anyways, but before we

get to that, Chuck and Greg, I know you guys

recently saw a movie together. How sweet. Hold

hands. Hold hands. I'm sure it was a delightful

time. You saw the new 300 sequel. So how was

it? I thought it was pretty good. They say it's

a sequel, but it's kind of, it's a prequel slash

concurrent slash sequel. It's sort of an all

in one deal. Oh, one of those. Yeah, it's kind

of tricky, but I mean, I guess it works because

they kind of depict the battle the Athenians

faced while the Spartans were fighting in the

first movie and then they kind of got into You

know what was happening at the same time and

what was happening a little bit after that? And

how they wanted to kind of unite Greece against

the Persians after the first 300 movie Overall,

I wasn't into This movie as I was for the first

one I was watching the exit sign for like a good

minute or two during this movie. I was just staring

at the exit sign. Yeah, I wasn't as into this

one. I mean, there were a lot of good things

about it. I mean, I'll list a few good things.

The fight choreography was fantastic, just like

the first film. And that's the biggest reason

I wanted to see this is because I really enjoy

those sword and sandal flicks and just watching

that old style of fighting. I think that's really

interesting to watch. Honestly, it's probably

the best part of the movie. The story's pretty

good. I do like how they tied into the first

one. As I mentioned, they explain to a degree

what was going on as the battle with the Spartans

in the first film was going on. And they also

get into some background with Xerxes as a child

and explain how the Mysticles killed his father

during an old battle and that kind of molded

him into this revenge -driven madman. One thing

though, I don't know if Greg's gonna agree with

me on this, but I didn't like - I haven't really

agreed so far on any of that Chuck, sorry. Well,

I didn't really like the whole explanation on

how he became 10 feet tall with him bathing in

this mystical pool that gave him strength and

made him huge and stuff. I thought that was kind

of stupid and they could have done something

different. I thought the whole backstory of Xerxes

was unimportant. to this particular story like

if they wanted to have that in the first one

of how he came to be a god okay but i felt like

it really didn't have a place in this movie so

i thought it was kind of necessary though because

it involved the mysticles who was the main character

of this movie so i thought that kind of tied

it in well but it was it was a nice little touch

i guess but i think a lot of his backstory was

just stupid because there's There's a lot of

stuff in this movie that isn't like You know

that really far -fetched sci -fi stuff and to

just make like one part of it like that It's

just it's kind of weird. It kind of throws it

off. Yeah Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I think

they could have explained it some other way.

I don't know but um After that they kind of get

into how the Athenians continued to battle the

Persians after they had heard of the Spartans

defeat and That's where it kind of turns into

the sequel part and I do like what they did with

having Themistocles persuade Leonidas' wife to

seek vengeance for his death. The reason for

that was Themistocles has this dream of, like,

uniting Greece, and he's trying to use the Spartan

300 as, like, martyrs, and he's trying to get

Queen Gorgo, which is her name, which I found

from IMDB. Did not catch that in the movie. So...

I don't think they ever actually really mentioned

her name. They might've, but... I don't know.

I didn't catch it at all, but I was probably

staring at the exit sign at the time. Was it

a nice exit sign at least? It was a nice green,

so I was just staring at it. It was like the

one time when I was working at the supermarket

and I took way too much Benetrile. I was like

halfway falling asleep and I was staring at this

green neon sign the whole night. Interesting.

Anyways, Chuck, what you're saying? Yeah, they

end up trying to get Queen Gorgo to send all

the Spartan fleet to aid the Athenians in the

battle with the Persians. And I mean, kind of

considering all that, it did create a pretty

good tapestry, I guess, in the overall story.

It's kind of interesting. But I mean, in spite

of all these things, it still seemed like it

was a bit of a drop off from the first film.

I mean, you might even say it was a big drop

off. But it was a big drop off, if you ask me.

I mean, I still kind of enjoyed it. Like I said,

just for the fighting element, like the choreography

and I just love that stuff. Like all those sword

and sandal movies I'm a fan of. So other than

being like really weird at certain parts of this

overall, I was, I was pretty satisfied with it.

Now on the negative side of things, I guess this

is my part where I get to jump in. There was

a huge long narration at the beginning of this,

which Besides keeping us up to beat what happened

in the last movie, I thought it was completely

pointless. Besides those specific things, I thought

it went on for way, way, way too long. The CGI

was tragic, to be honest. Yeah, it was. I think

like Blade 2, or was it the first Blade where

they did the CGI of... The first Blade, yeah.

Yeah, the first Blade where... There's this big

blow up of blood going everywhere. The CGI kind

of reverted back to that and I think Blade was

one of the first movies to do like a liquid type

of CGI for the most part. Anytime anybody got

cut in 300 it was like it was very bad blood

CGI where it just looked way too shiny. It didn't

look like a liquid it looked more like a a solid

for the most part. There's probably other examples,

but I don't really remember offhand. It was just

the blood and the quantity of CGI blood that

they used, it really, really, really stuck out.

The gigantic moon on the horizon too, that was

a little too much. Oh yeah, the moon was freaking,

it was way too close. Way too close. Maybe it

was closer back then, I don't know. But then

there's a scene that really bugged me towards

the end, which I kind of figured out what they

were going to use it as a setup for as kind of

like, I don't know, dueling scenes. But there's

one point where the main Athenian, which, what's

his name, Chuck? Themistocles. Yeah, I forget

all these names. Too complicated for my modern

mind. The Mystic Lies gets on the boat and talks

with the main villain for this one, the girl.

Do you know what her name is, Chuck? Artemisia.

Thank you. Nice to meet you. I'm going to start

making up Greek names and see if you notice,

like the Mystic Lies and... That I would notice

but uh, he goes on the boat and they're kind

of like discussing terms to kind of stop the

fighting I guess and it was kind of predictable

where it was gonna go they kind of hook up and

They kind of use it as a comparison about who's

gonna win a fight later on like the final fight

like Up it's it's it's she's winning now. She's

more physically Domineering up. No P is and they're

doing it all through Sex acts for the most part

that whole part was just really awful. Like I

don't know. Yeah It was it was being being edgy.

Yeah edgy just to be edgy like There they were

looking for parts to knock it up to being controversial

The funniest thing about that was the two Persians

that were standing outside the cabin and heard

the noise and they're like looking at each other.

Yeah. It was like a little humor moment they

put in there. In the first 300, some of the nudity

had a place, but this one, that scene just really

didn't have a place. They're enemies. Why are

they doing this? Yeah, I just want to be like

yay nudity, but I was like this is pointless

I can just go home and watch a porn on my computer.

I don't but your home does not have an exit sign

I'm gonna have to buy one of those apparently

any bad movie. I'll just look at the exit sign

on the wall What else did I think was awful about

this movie? The fact that they had Xerxes in

there and then they had this this A thing of

whatever the fuck her name is. Amnesia? Whatever.

Amnesia? All those names give me that. Like,

she seems, he's supposed to be a god, so why

the hell are we caring about her? She's, like,

number two to him, so why, like... If we're gonna

have a... We have to have it just as good as

the last enemy or better Like I didn't understand

that at all Yeah, it was a little weird how they

kind of did that like if I mean if they're gonna

make it about her I mean kind of maybe don't

even put him in there then yeah, exactly I didn't

I didn't understand that Yeah, she she she did

well with the acting. I guess she looked nice.

She's very pretty woman, but And another thing

that bugged me was everybody is talking so intense

throughout the entire movie that I was just starting

not to care what they were talking about. Like

everybody brought the same intensity and the

same kind of speech pattern to their performance

where it all just kind of blended together where

it became like my 11th grade math teacher. It

all just became very monotone. it like and so

that was another reason why I was just kind of

staring at exit signs because I I didn't really

get that feeling per se but it was I kind of

see what you're saying though it was a little

like you know everyone was like super serious

and like kind of the same personality so Yeah,

and everybody had the same intensity to there.

In Sparta, we've battled Xerxes. I never knew

that you narrated that. That was good. Thank

you. One cool thing that I was impressed that

they showed was that old Greek phrase like liquid

fire. I don't even know if that's the right phrase

or not, but they had oil in their ships and they

kind of open these sliding doors on the side

of the ships and like oil poured out onto the

sea and then they lit it on fire with their arrows

and stuff and that was pretty cool like you know

part of mythology that I remember so it was pretty

neat to see that in there. The only thing I found

really interesting was the Athenians using their

brain like you like you learn it in history class.

The Spartans were like brute force and the Athenians

were brain. So it was kind of interesting to

see the more brain aspect. I don't think they

kind of I don't think they brought that out too

much. But what they did, I kind of appreciated

that aspect at least. Yeah, definitely. I guess

Greg, one question. Did you did you like the

first 300 movie? I did enjoy the first 300 movie.

I don't know what happened in between that. My

opinion just changed so much from the first movie

to the second movie. Also, by the way, I felt

like they use different filters or something

because it didn't look as nice either as the

first one. It didn't have that. that design quality

that every scene could be a photograph kind of

quality to it, I don't think. The filters were

just weird and not really appealing to me on

this one. I'm sure part of that too is like when

300 came out, that type of technology, that action

was really not seen to that style before. Yeah,

it's been done so much. I wonder if it's like

a sequel that's just, it's been too long to really

be effective. I worry the same thing about the

Sin City sequel that's coming out later this

year. I love Sin City. I haven't seen it in a

very long time, so I don't know how well it holds

up, but I loved it at the time because it was

so unique. There was nothing like that, but now

it's like 10 years later, literally like 10 years

later. Maybe a little longer. Certain technology

does not take well. You look at some movies from

the 80s and you try to then do that again in

the 90s. It's not going to work as well. So,

you know, I don't know what the hell happened,

but I have not seen that yet. So I really can't

throw my opinion. Hopefully we'll see it sometime.

Probably I'll wait for for DVD because even I

do for TV. Yeah, yeah, I am interested. We'll

see how that is. But you guys have anything else

to say about 300 rise of an empire? That's about

all I got to say about that one rise of my bored

boredom Alright, I did not see that but I did

see the new TV series and this was actually when

we talked about sequel reboot or destroy someone

mentioned I think was a James and the comments

mentioned about Cosmos and that reboot that's

happening and that just premiered a few weeks

ago It's coming back. I actually never watched

the old call it Cosmos. I did with Peter Sagan

Carl Sagan. Carl Sagan. Thank you, Greg. Speaking

of monotone. See, he doesn't have a Greek name,

so you remember his name. Yes, I do. I also listened

to him a bunch of times in the astronomy club.

Nice. I did watch the first episode of Cosmos

with Neil deGrasse Tyson, who I'm a pretty big

fan of. He's always found him entertaining. I

like his podcast Star Talk. Pluto exists! It

doesn't, though. What's funny is I was reading

something about Pluto and how it... Since its

discovery till now. It still hasn't done a complete

rotation of the Sun yet. It's like, oh it really

is not a planet then Well, anyways, so I did

watch the new cosmos that came out. It was like

the first episode I did I did like it a good

deal. I think it has a lot of potential I'm not

sure how long the series is gonna run for but

I'm just kind of amazed that a show like this

is going is broadcast on Network TV on a Sunday

night like a science show produced by Seth MacFarlane

the guy who made Family Guy. It's just, it's

so mind -boggling to me and on Fox. It hurts

the brain when you think about it too much, but

the first episode was cool. It kind of got into

space and just what I really dug about it too

was how it's expanded upon like our galaxy, kind

of trying to kind of show how big the universe

and how much we know about the universe up to

this point and just how minute you realize we

are. It's like, oh wow, we are really, really

tiny, but The only thing I didn't really dig

about it was like during the show, he's like

in this spaceship that's like flying around and

it did feel like it took a little bit to get

going. I was just waiting for it to kind of do

more. I'm looking forward to the next episode,

but it did feel like an hour introduction before

we actually got into the actual stuff. So Chuck,

you saw it as well, right? Did you enjoy it?

Yeah, I enjoyed it. I think I did like. kind

of the visuals in the beginning as they were

going out through the solar system, out through

the Milky Way and kind of as he was going through

that cosmic address thing. I thought the visuals

during that time were really cool. Yeah, yeah,

that's very true. But the one part, especially

to where it was like, I think it was shown either

a planet or a sun or something. And you see the

image kind of like warp into like a sphere and

you realize it's like the reflection on the ship.

And it just hit me for some reason. I'm like,

man, they're like burning through their budget

with this, like in the first episode, like they're

showing like a lot of, you know, just graphics

and stuff like that. But that's part of the,

I guess, the sense of wonder of the show to,

you know, get people to watch that and just the

breathtaking visuals and stuff. So that's like

a cool part of it. Sounds like they should have

got the guys from that to do 300. 300 in space.

Yeah, one little nitpicky thing I had about it,

I guess, was kind of the cartoon sequence they

showed like through the middle of the episode

about that Bruno guy. I mean, I thought it was

interesting that they told his backstory and

stuff like that, but it felt it just felt weird.

Like the cartoon ran like really long. Like,

I don't know. Did you get that impression, Dan?

It was a little bit awkward when it came in because

it's just like suddenly here's a cartoon. Yeah,

I did like the animation of it. It did kind of

go on for a little bit longer than I was expecting.

It was like, okay, and then and then they eventually

got to it You guys have me thinking this is like

Bruno from very nice and animated by Seth MacFarlane

It's exactly like that completely It did go on

for a little bit longer than I was expecting

But I think it was at least I did like the animation

of it and I and I did think it was an effective

way of telling that story so at the time I really

Didn't really have an issue, but I could see

how it's kind of suddenly like and it's now a

cartoon about history. That's but yeah Overall

it was pretty cool though I like to hear Greg

if you ever get a chance to see it see what you

think she wants the original of it I've never

really watched the original so I don't we know

The original is is very very like hippie serene

and then Carl Sagan's narrations are very monotone

and His voice just puts me right to sleep, to

be quite honest. Please don't make me watch the

Carl Sagan version. Please. Unless I need to

go to sleep at night, then it's okay. Well, I

think you'll like Neil deGrasse Tyson's voice.

At least I do. Actually, I heard him, too, on

the Nerdist podcast. He was on that. About the

time this debuted, it's funny. He's a really

funny dude. He talks about how people always

make fun of his mustache because it looks like

it's a porn stash and everything. It's a it's

a good episode with Nerdist if you get a chance

to listen to it kind of gives you a little bit

of backstory on on the show and how it came about

and everything like that and It's a little crazy

like how it's not doing Farley and the guy who

did Family Guy is a big reason That's coming

on like it would not be on Fox. It wasn't for

him So there's a lot of people who are out there

her kind of not big fans of him I enjoy and you

got to give him credit for trying to expand His

career and into new into new areas. So that's

at least one good thing But anyways and you guys

I got anything else before we take a break here

and we get into our big bad tournament I I did

want to talk about one thing actually and I think

it's something that we all kind of watched or

at least found out the news on online at some

point in the last couple days and that was the

Marvel Studios TV special that was on Tuesday

night. I did not see it because my wife was watching

glee So I missed it, but I did see that is not

a good reason I I know I should probably hand

in my key card right now, but License has been

revoked. I did I did go to the online and did

read up all the information on it though Yeah,

I thought it was good it for the most part it

just kind of recapped all the movies released

by Marvel Studios like starting with Iron Man

and did up through like Thor the Dark World and

There were some like funny little tidbits in

the beginning, but I think like the last Maybe

20 minutes were like the best part of it, where

they kind of show some new footage of Captain

America, Winter Soldier, Guardians of the Galaxy.

Like half a second of Ant -Man. Yeah, I'm not

sure if you guys actually saw, but you get a

glimpse of Ronan the Accuser in there from Guardians.

And I got to say, he actually looked like spot

on visually, like with respect to the comics,

like that looked pretty cool, actually. I didn't

see him now. I did see the image. He's like in

the background. He has like the hood on so Yeah,

I am curious how that how he's gonna work. I

do like that character a great deal. So yeah,

you know then they showed some sketches like

some concept art sketches for Avengers age of

Ultron and that included a couple of Quicksilver

and Scarlet witch and They looked great, too.

I thought Quicksilver especially. I think he

looks way better than Fox's version that's going

to be in the X -Men movie. He does look a lot

better than that, yes. He's kind of got the classic

sky blue color uniform. Although it's a little

bit different from the comics. It's a little

bit different than the comics, but I think it

looks pretty good so far. I thought they made

Scarlet Witch. It was going to be played by Elizabeth

Olsen, I believe. Yes. Yeah, and she's the sister

of Mary -Kate and Ashley. And the outfit that

they give her for Scarlet Witch, I'm like, I

think they just rated her sister's wardrobe like

they went into Mary -Kate and Ashley's wardrobe

and just picked out a couple of things. It was

a full house. Oh, snap. But yeah, then the biggest

reveal kind of came at the end. And that was

a concept sketch of the Hulk fighting Iron Man

wearing the Hulkbuster armor. And you get to

see a little bit of the gauntlet too. And talk

about a geek moment. I mean, that was just awesome.

I know the Hulkbuster armor is a major fan favorite.

I know the three of us all like it too. And I

think after Iron Man being in like four movies,

fans are like really just hoping for this Hulkbuster

armor to kind of appear in one of these movies

at some point. I thought it looked pretty sweet.

I know it's just a concept drawing for now, but

it's huge too like it's even bigger than the

Hulk and from my angle, I mean it looked like

a lot like the comic version too. So I'm definitely

excited to to see that in action. So do you guys

think that is like since Tony Stark is the person

who's supposed to be the one who creates Ultron,

you think that's Hulk kind of going crazy or

do you think that's Ultron controlling the Iron

Man? I think it's Ultron controlling Iron Man.

That's a good question. I don't know. I guess

I hadn't thought about that. We have to know

now because this is all we're going to find out

about it. They're not going to talk about it

again today. I'm going to say it's actually Stark

in there. Interesting. But is the armor being

controlled with Stark in there? No, I think Stark

is in it and controlling it. I was trying to

get you on the technicality. I don't know, just

Stark's got an ego. And I think this whole time,

I think he thinks that he can invent something

and create something that can stop the Hulk.

And I don't think he's going to do it, but he's

going to try. So he's going to be a complete

asshole and cause like severe amount of damage.

Well, not really an asshole because he's going

to try to stop the Hulk because he might be on

the rampage or something. But I don't know. I'm

just I'm really speculating here. movies like

barely started filming but writing the movie

based on one image we are yeah pretty much and

go but yeah that did look cool i hopefully go

back and watch that actual episode but the images

did look pretty awesome scarlett which yeah she

did look like she had casual clothes on but that

could be just that one image like that could

be that one outfit or something like that though

yeah it would be kind of where she gets introduced

and stuff yeah it would be kind of hard to Put

her in that comic book outfit, but you know,

I'd enjoy it though So if you see Elizabeth Olsen,

I don't think people would be against that Greg

especially Anyways, that'll do it all for this

segment. So we'll take a quick break here and

we come back we'll be trying to find out who

really is the biggest badass out there and Sorry,

Greg. It is not me Kim Kardashian We'll see you

in a bit All right, and welcome back. And like

I mentioned as we began the podcast, today we're

going to be doing a special little project inspired

by March Madness, where we look at the biggest

badass out there and try to determine who exactly

that is. We have enlisted characters and people

from all over the land of pop culture, from TVs,

movies, comic books, pretty much anything you

can imagine. Put them all in one bracket, and

we're going to have them battling it out. Proclaim

her hair. This is not who wins in the fight.

This is not who's more powerful That's not what

we're doing because Batman's in this so Batman

would automatically win that because that's what

he does He's he wins all those arguments all

the time. This is more so who is the biggest

badass? We're gonna use whatever logic. We really

want to we can talk about their legacy We can

talk about whatever makes them into a badass

per se and look at this farther who can piss

father You know who can we should have got that

guy from bushwhack. He probably would have been

great for that We can use whatever logic we want.

And then what we'll be doing for each round,

myself, Greg, and Chuck, we'll all vote on who

we think is the bigger badass and whoever has

the most votes when. So it's a democracy here,

not a dictatorship. Unless you guys disagree

with me, then I will override you and I'll pick

who I want. So I'm going to Vladimir Putin up

this bracket. I was going to make a Putin joke.

Where you putting it? Putin along with the jokes

there. All right, cry me a river. Anyways, the

bracket has been split into two sides. The first

side is the region of the Barons of Bad Asterdam,

and the second are the Bruisers of the Beefcake.

And we're going to see who wins each side and

then put them together. Today we're looking at

the Barons of Bad Asterdam in that region and

going to have to spell this on a chart later,

right? I'm making up the chart for this. I don't

think there's a way to spell that. Anyways, we're

going to determine the first winner of the first

region and then next week we'll get the winner

of the second region and then they'll battle

out for the ultimate badass champion. So I think

I made that a lot more complicated than I needed

to, so let's get to it. You guys have any questions

before we get this show on the road or any comments?

I had a comment just that we're probably going

to put the link to the visual of the bracket

in the show notes so you can kind of click on

it and... He'll have like this full visual of

the bracket to follow along or whatever. Yeah,

that's a very good, very good point. Better than

me just saying it out loud. All right, so we'll

get the first matchup underway. And we did, if

you know anything about March Madness, there

are, they're seeding like the best team you think

is going to win is higher the seed and the less

chance of winning there is lower the seed. So

Greg and I and Chuck all came up with a different

people that we thought could fit into this. And

then we tried to seed them based upon their likelihood

of success. how well we know them, and that type

of stuff. So that way we can try to make it fair

as possible. And then we randomly put them together

and created these matchups. So we're starting

with probably a very common matchup, one that

you see all the time. People talk about it. It's

endly debated. You know, this one is kind of

your standard typical matchup. And that, of course,

is Batman versus his arch rival, the Kool -Aid

man. Oh, yeah. So we have to determine who is

the bigger badass. I think I'm gonna kick this

off and Batman being a number 1 seed and Kool

-Aid Man being a number 16 seed, it does not

sway me one bit. I think the Kool -Aid Man is

a bigger badass. This is the reason why. Yeah,

Batman has his tools, he's a superhero, he's

got all that stuff. But the Kool -Aid Man? Kool

-Aid Man's a badass. That dude... Signature move

is knocking down walls. He doesn't care what

type of wall it is. It can be the Berlin Wall,

the Great Wall of China. It doesn't matter. That

dude is gonna burst that wall down and give the

great gift of refreshing beverages. Seriously.

And what people don't realize about Colleen Maynard

is his parents were too, killed in an alleyway.

But did he cry about it? No. Did he dress up

like a bad about it? No, he got over it. That

dude is an is uh reeking in positivity So he

he he comes in like a boss and he gives kids

That's something does not sound good thing when

he comes in like a boss and gives kids. Thanks.

This is not michael jackson. Uh Anyways, I think

the cooling man is a pretty big badass. You don't

want to mess with him I mean, what are you gonna

do to him? You can't do anything The dude is

unstoppable. So my focus is the kool -aid man

Chuck, what do you think? You know, even though

the Kool -Aid man has the word cool in his name,

I think I'm gonna have to go with Batman on this

one because I have faith in the detective's skills

to find a weakness for someone made of glass.

Is it the verge from the core, maybe? I think

he might, you know... determine some sort of

weakness as like, you know, a hammer or, uh,

you know, just something hard that he could throw

at him. So, but now that, I mean, we're not doing

a fight here, but figure badass. I think, uh,

Batman just has more, uh, more lore, more history,

uh, has taken on some crazy villains, kind of

never gets rattled, uh, with fear from anyone.

I just, I don't know. I just got to go with Batman

on this one. He could bring out Kool -Aid's arch

nemesis, the straw. And he'd be done for, so.

Anyways. Greg, what is your vote? Well, I'm going

to go based off of Chuck's argument. He's not

made of normal glass, though. Chuck, take a glass

that's sitting on your desk somewhere and then

throw it up against the wall. That fucker is

going to break. Kool -Aid man will break through

that wall. Your house will be destroyed. I'm

sorry Chuck, but he's gonna make it through and

so he's made of some type of different glass.

Is Batman gonna figure that out? I'm not quite

so sure but uh That that straw theory kind of

is is the Kool -Aid his brain? Yeah, it is his

soul. It is his soul. I think Don't know Stewie

made him look pretty silly Batman after a nice

night of problem Gotham is probably gonna get

really thirsty and probably and like the longer

the battle goes on Batman could draw it out the

battle. I think he's gonna get thirstier and

thirstier So I think Batman's gonna take it by

sucking down. Well, this isn't a fight, right?

I can't use that logic. You use whatever logic

you want great Surprisingly enough. This is not

official It's not an NCAA approved. I don't want,

I don't know who I want to go for now. I thought

this was the presidential badass bracket. I'll

just say this Greg, if you vote for Kool -Aid

man, I cannot let that happen. I will just vote

for Batman. I don't want the internet coming

down on us by kicking up, allowing that to happen.

So he will be removed from the internet. I'm

going I'm going with Kool -Aid man, then and

I will change my vote the Batman the next round

All right, the next round is actually that was

a 1 verse 16 and then this is an 8 verse 9 So

these are two very close to close seats. Obviously

these sees me nothing so doesn't like it matters.

But anyways, it's fun to think about number 8

this character is One of the hottest characters

right now, literally and figuratively, and that

is Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games, one

of the biggest movie last year, and her opponent,

he's probably second biggest thing in the world

right now, and that, of course, is JCVD himself,

John Claude Van Damme. Who is the biggest badass?

Greg, you ended last round, so we'll start with

you this time. Who do you think is the bigger

badass? I know who has the nicer ass. Chung Ha

Van Dam, but besides that. I'm just going to

use that as my entire argument. She has the nicer

ass and she can kick a lot of ass. She is awesome

with that freaking bow and arrow, taking people

out, having freaking Lord of the Flies kids battling

her and her surviving and outwitting all these.

Government officials the hoity -toity government

officials. I think Katniss is is really badass

All right one vote for Katniss Chuck, where does

your vote lie? I am gonna have to go with Mr.

Van Dam on this one. Oh my god, that was a shocker.

Yes, and my reasoning is just because of his

Really long sound effects after he makes a kick

Just that yeah All those splits make him slightly

less badass though Yeah, but then when he does

one with the two trucks going backwards, I mean

that that's pretty badass Yeah, I think he's

pretty badass and then just some of the stunts

that he's done cutting a tree down with his leg

and Breaking parts and bricks and all kinds of

stuff. It's got to be JCVD. It's you know, that's

the bottom line for me. Sorry, so I'm not a badass

and so much so that I'm going to have to go with

Katniss Everdeen because if I don't, my wife's

going to get angry because she likes Katniss.

But I do think she's actually maybe a little

bit of a bigger badass. I think JCVD is pretty,

is pretty sweet. He's pretty awesome. He's got

sweet, sweet, sweet like candy. She's leading

revolts against the government. She, like you

said, has some awesome arrow moves. She can kick

ass. You know, she's kind of got it all. She's

a leader. I don't think anyone's going to follow

GCBD to do anything. So I'm going to give the

slight edge, the very, very slight edge to Katniss

Everdeen. This bracket's fixed. The girl on fire.

How am I involved in this and it's still fixed?

You're one third of this. All right, so we're

going to put on Katniss goes on to the next round.

Alright next up. Oh, we just talked about Batman

and fittingly enough Next up is his literally

his arch nemesis the Joker and he's fighting

again another classic battle with Doc Holliday

from Tombstone or the legendary outlaw Who is

the bigger badass? I guess Chuck you haven't

started one off yet. So we'll start with you

this round. Who is the bigger badass? Doc Holliday

or the Joker? And you could use whatever version

of Jokey you want in whatever version of Doc

Holliday you want, I guess. But I'm going to

guess you're not going to go with the Wired Art

version. I'm thinking the actual Tombstone version

played by Val Kilmer. I think he was pretty badass

in that movie. Just kind of looking people in

the eye and doing his gunfights and not showing

any fear. I'll be your Uncle Barry. Yes, classic,

classic line. but the only problem with that

is he is facing off against the Joker and Honestly,

I think the Joker takes the cake here. He he

is just way more badass I don't even I don't

even know how to justify it. I think it speaks

for him see speaks for itself. I don't know Yeah,

I will I got to go with you on that one, too

I think the Joker is a little more bigger of

a badass than Doc Holliday Mean to go up against

Batman. I mean that to be your thing and you're

not even super powered You don't know how to

fight. You're just super crazy and will do whatever

he literally laughs in the face of danger Laughs

like an idiot, but he still laughs You know you

have no sense of reality or morals. You literally

will do anything and everything just for fun

You're you know, you have no real motivations.

You're not looking to rule the world or get money

You're just like to screw around with people

so In looking at his history and what he has

done as a character and how he's reinvented himself

from Jack Nicholson to Heath Ledger to, you know,

the comic books and everything. You got to go.

You got to go with the Joker on this one. So,

Greg, what is your vote by? You stole all my

answers, you bastard. I'm just going to say Joker

and we can move on to the next category. That's

fair enough. Ooh, this one is a little bit of

an oddball one, but these are probably the most

fun. Fittingly, we just talked about JCVD, and

I guess this is kind of along the same lines,

and that is, of course, the infamous Rambo going

up against Bart Simpson. Who is the bigger badass?

Bart Simpson or Rambo? I guess I'll start with

myself this time and I don't even know who I'm

voting for I'm trying to determine as I'm looking

at this Wow, that is that is pretty tough. You

know what? I think I'm gonna go with Bart Simpson

in this one. The reason being the Rambo Yeah,

he's pretty tough. He'll he literally won Vietnam

five years later after it was over in Rambo 2

but he's also kind of crazy and He kind of does

stuff without really thinking Bart Simpson The

key was a badass for a new generation like, you

know, the Bart man He cutting off heads of statues

and Springfield not many people can be a badass

fourth grader for 20 years I mean that that's

a talent. So I'm gonna go I'm gonna go with Bart

Simpson. That's the the rebel without a cause

Chuck who you voting for I'm gonna have to go

with the Rambo on this one I mean the guy took

on like an entire country like two different

times or three different times and still won

me free to countless prisoners of war and did

it style to it. I don't know. I mean, I like

Bart Simpson. I like the Simpsons, but I think

there's no comparison. Rambo wins this. Greg,

what say you? He runs through the jungle all

sweaty and he still gets the ladies. I'm going

to go with Rambo because I don't even think Bart

Simpson has any kind of interest in the ladies.

I think he still thinks the ladies has cooties.

Rambo still gets sweaty in the jungles all stinky,

and he still gets the ladies, so I'm giving it

to him. All right, one vote for Rambo. Next matchup,

the infamous, the legendary, Bruce Lee against

the infamous, the legendary, Stewie Griffin.

Who wins this one? Chuck, what is your vote go?

This one's a tough one. You know, Bruce Lee was

kind of the foundation of you know, karate movies

and kung fu movies and fought a lot of villains

over the years, you know, pretty much defined

badass before Chuck Norris even came along. Stewie

Griffin's more the newer age animated badass.

And I think he he deserves some respect in his

own right. But I got to go with the master here,

Bruce Lee. All right, Greg, what about you? Who

who who survived a worse? Childhood who survived

falling downstairs getting like like beat up

and is still living to this day It wasn't bruce

lee. It's stewie griffin. He goes through time.

He he creates these baddest inventions. He's

uh traveled through the body he Gets the shit

kicked out of him and he's still alive He's survived

a house full of idiots that could kill him at

any moment and he's still around so i'm going

with stewie griffin I think we're going to go

to Stewart Griffin as well. The reason being,

he's only a child. So he may be even a bigger

badass as he gets older. Like you said, Greg,

the amount of stuff he has done as just a baby,

it's kind of crazy. You know, from trying to

kill his mom, to going in time, to trying to

fight with his neighbor dog. He is a character

nonetheless. Bruce Lee is a legend, no doubt.

But if I had to pick, like, who am I more frightened

of? Who do I think is more capable of crazy and...

Badass things. I'm gonna have to go with Stewie

Griffin on this one So we're gonna push Stewie

Griffin and let him move on. Oh, that's rich

Next up and Greg I think we're gonna have to

start with you on this one because I think you

know this one character more than Chuck and I

but the start off we first have the Punisher

the vigilante with the cause and he's going up

against Brock Sampson from Venture Brothers.

And if you listen to any of our past podcasts,

you know, Greg's a big fan of Venture Brothers.

Chuck and I have not really partaken in it. So,

Greg, we're going to kind of maybe follow your

lead on this one. Who do you think is a bigger

badass? It's definitely Brock Sampson. He's gotten

hit with multiple trank darts and got rover by

a vehicle and buried, buried alive. and he has

essentially come back from the dead. He had a

robot installed into his chest to replace his

heart. He's a spy, complete badass. He fights

crocodiles. Punisher is just one thing. He's

just going after the mob, and he's killed a lot

of people, but so has Brock Sampson. He's run

over a lot of the monarch henchmen. in his freaking

badass car. I forget whether it's a Challenger

or a Charger, but it's freaking awesome, and

he's just running people over. He's got a license

to kill. He's the man. And if that doesn't convince

you, I have visual evidence for you guys if I

still have it up here. Greg, put that away. Oh,

jeez. We're not even the same room, Dan. I can

just tell you don't have pants on right now.

I can feel it. I actually do have pants on this

time, but I sent you guys a link. Which maybe

we could put up on the site, but we'll do. But

my vote is for Brock Sampson. I don't think he's

going to win it because you guys really don't

know what he's about. But I think you made a

pretty good case there. So Chuck, I'm curious,

who do you go with? Are you going to buy into

Greg's case or are you going with the infamous

Punisher? I'm going to the Punisher because I

have no idea who Brock Sampson is. Fair enough.

And I don't understand it, so I hate it. Are

you the internet? No, but uh, I don't know. I

got a little soft spot for the Punisher there,

so I wasn't a big comic reader, but I was a fan

of the movie, and you know, I was just pretty

badass what he did, so I'll have to vote Punisher

on this one. But Brock does more insane shit

than the Punisher does. I'm sure he does, but

I've never seen it, so that's why I sent you

the link! It's a campaign commercial from Brock,

uh, Bronx Hamson saying why he's a bigger badass.

It's got a mullet chuck, come on. Oof, you know

what? This is tough. I think, Greg, you put up

a pretty good argument, and I am a fan of The

Punisher. I've read a lot of his comics. My brother

was a big fan of The Punisher, too, but Brock

is just more badass. Yeah, the thing is, I think

you put up a good argument, Greg. I do think,

based upon what you're saying and my Little bit

of knowledge of Brock Bronx Hampton, and I'm

also a big fan of the voice actor where actor

that does his voice It's just for the sake of

variety. Let's go with Brock Samson. So Brock

Samson moving on maybe a little bit of an upset

there who knows and I'm sure The fans from the

Punisher body can't listen. They probably very

angry right now, but They're all behind their

monitors, weeping silently. I can hear the comments

as we speak. Next up, going in a completely different

direction, but still kind of badass. You know

what? It's one thing to be badass in a comic

book. It's one thing to be badass in a movie.

But to be a badass on a kid's TV show in the

90s, that's saying something. And that is certainly

the Green Ranger, the Green Power Ranger. And

he's going up. Though, against Michonne from

The Walking Dead, who is a bigger badass, the

Green Ranger or Michonne? I think I'll start

this one off, and man, this is really tough.

I really want to go with Green Power Ranger,

but I can't. To me, Michonne is just... A super

badass. I think badass is someone with the attitude

of Michonne. She walks a walk, she talks a talk.

While everyone's running from zombies, she's

keeping them as pets. With that sword, she can

take them down like no tomorrow. She lives in

the apocalypse. She lives in the zombie apocalypse,

and in that environment where you have the worst

people possible, she stands supreme as a pretty

big badass. So I gotta go with Michonne on this

one. Greg, what do you think? Keep doing that

noise a lot tonight. Um Pet zombies man That

that's frickin awesome in chains. I'm gonna go

with that. I think it's a no -duh situation Okay,

I even even though the the Green Ranger has a

frickin badass vehicle We got two votes for Michelle

but Chuck. I mean I could I could be swayed and

Can you provide an argument for the Green Ranger

or are you also going with Michonne? I Think

it's gonna be a clean sweep here for Michonne.

I do I do enjoy the Green Ranger, you know his

dragon sword was pretty badass and I Know he

was probably supposed to be the most powerful

Ranger the most Talented as far as his martial

arts and everything But being on a little kids

TV show in the 90s. I mean just the hair on the

wimpy side shown like there's nothing wimpy about

her like like you said Dan, I mean she She talks

the talk, but she backs it up. I mean She she's

like the essence of badass. I could see her going

pretty far in this bracket actually so Very nice.

Very nice. She's going the distance She's going

for speed Greg you're a badass for quoting cake.

I love you Greg You too, Dan. I love you too,

man. Next up, finishing off this section, a 2

verse 15 mashup. I've not been saying the C's,

but it doesn't really matter anyways. But we

talked about license to kill. I think you said

with Brock Sampson. Well, this person is for

sure a man with license to kill. And that is

of course Bond, James Bond. Going up against

maybe the only person in the world that's sexier

than James Bond and that of course is Al Borland

from home improvement Chuck, I know you're a

huge home improvement fan. So I got to start

with you on this one Who you going with who is

the bigger badass? Well, I know I haven't seen

much James Bond at all as we talked about in

the last podcast, but You know Al's a cool guy

and all I Really don't see him as badass though.

I mean I don't think he can compete with Bond.

Bond's got the gadgets. He's got the ladies.

He's got, you know, he's got everything. So got

to vote Bond here. And Greg, on to you. I know

you're a big Bond fan and I think actually you're

the one who put Al Borland on the board though.

So who are you going with? I'm going to make

a couple of points for Al. He does have frequently

said that he does get the ladies going after

him. So I think he probably can have a little

competition with Bond on that aspect. And I just

find it surprising how much shit that he has

survived, the shit storm that is Tim Taylor and

his more power adventures. Like Al has survived

all of that, and he probably knows quite a bit

of medical knowledge to patch up Tim on a construction

site. But even with all that, James Bond probably

gets out like Like one or two more women and

he actually takes it to the to the next step

with them and He also survived death many many

a times the only thing that kind of brings James

Bond down a little bit is the STDs Yeah, well

the fact that he survived that is pretty badass

Now the only thing that takes him down like a

couple notches is the the movie with what's his

name the crappy bond George Lazendy I really

like that movie. Really? I've never really seen

it, but he gets married, so that kind of chops

off his legs a little bit. Who does that? But

the whole scene with, and this is my least favorite

bond, well, one of my least favorite bonds, what's

his name, Craig, Daniel Craig, the torture scene

in the first one, where he gets his boy's...

Crushed with a giant rope. Yeah. Yeah him going

through that and pretty freaking badass So I'm

gonna I'm gonna vote for James Bond I'm gonna

say why I do think Al Borland is an understated

badass I mean not many people can wear flannel

like Al Borland. Come on. Yeah, I mean and he's

got a beard I mean I was gonna say yeah, that's

he that beard is pretty sweet. It's pretty tight

and he also hosted Family Feud Don't know how

that makes him a badass, but they want it out

there, but all that said it's James Bond I mean

the guy from the first moment he was introduced

in movies one of the best introductions in movie

history He's been one of the ultimate badasses

of badass them, so I'm going with James Bond

as well. It's a clean sweep All right moving

on to our next matchup and kind of almost one

of the people that inspired this so pretty good

Good chance. This is going pretty far. It's another

number one seed and that of course is Brian Mills

from Taken, Liam Neeson himself going up against

maybe someone a little bit less tough per se

though if he wasn't Taken that might be an interesting

movie still and that of course is Sweating to

the 80s himself, Richard Simmons We ended with

Greg or actually ended with me last time. So

maybe we'll start with Chuck this time. Who are

you taking in this one? I'm going to take a guess.

I might have an idea, but who's a bigger badass?

Brian Mills or Richard Simmons? Well, I'm going

to I'm going to say who I'm taken. And that would

be Brian Mills from Taken. I do think. I know

Richard Simmons, he's got a little badass going

on there because not many people could pull off

shorts quite that short and that tight. Yeah,

and those, you know, tank tops and just kind

of put himself out there and, you know, have

stuff showing when the shorts get hiked up a

little too far. I can see brain. I don't know,

the brain mills, you know, not many people can

punch that many people in the throat repeatedly

and have like no one learn from it. I just think

that's a pretty badass move. Just that whole

overcoming that whole thing and taken possible

odds jumping onto a boat and Just taking over

the boat taking out everybody on there Just he

just overcomes the impossible odds. I got to

go with brian mills I mean richard simmons has

his own special set of skills. Let's be honest.

I mean he Yeah, it might be a bit different.

I mean that guy you got to give him credit. He

he He has lasted all these years. He's still

you know doing his thing, but Not many people

can make a phone call sound just as badass as

Liam Neeson in Taken. So I gotta go with him.

Greg, is it a clean sweep or are you going with

Simmons? I kinda wanna go with Simmons. Just

to be an asshole, but um... You would like that.

What? Sorry, you said you'd... Bad joke. Sorry,

I root it once again. Sorry. Yeah, like Chuck

was saying, Richard Simmons to go out there and

all that gear that he has that weird Afro, his

voice, he probably takes a ton of shit and he's

still chipper as hell, which is fricking is impressive.

But I'm going with Brian. He just he just like

called out Putin. Yeah, you got to get pretty

fricking badass if you ask me. So next up. We

have to talk about him every episode, of course,

and that is Arrow from the show, of course, Arrow,

or the vigilante or the hood or whatever they're

calling him now. Who's that? What? Who's Arrow?

Oh, he's that guy from that show. I've never

heard of him before. Chuck, Chuck, do you know

who he is? No, I'm not familiar with that. OK.

Well, we'll see how he goes. I wonder how he

made onto the list. Yeah, he's mysterious, I

guess. Use of mystery. It's actually, you know

what? It's actually an actual arrow. It's just

the tool used by people throughout the years.

Anyways, it's arrow growing up against Raphael

from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, not the

infamous philosopher or artist or whatever he

was. I show my stupidity there. And Chuck. Renaissance

man. Chuck, we got to kind of go with you on

this one, since you're such a big fan of arrow.

I got to see what you have to say. Who was the

bigger badass, Aero or Raphael? You know, ever

since back in the day, I think Raphael has been

the biggest badass of the Turtles. He's kind

of that one that fights first and asks questions

later. He's really not worried about the danger

that he runs into. He's kind of headstrong. And

he's not necessarily the leader of the team,

which is Leonardo, but he's definitely kind of

the spiritual leader, like maybe the heart of

the team. He is definitely a big badass and he

garners some consideration, but what would I

be if I didn't pick my show that I always sponsor,

which is Arrow. I'm going to have to go with

Arrow. I mean, the guy spent five years on an

island, learned how to shoot a bow ridiculously

well, stayed in ridiculous shape and muscular

somehow, even though he was probably malnourished.

So however that works. He was on the caveman

diet. Yeah And you know, he spent the time on

the island with a future villain and Deathstroke

and You know just had to fight all these people

and learn to survive you got to go the arrow

that's just pretty badass All right on to me.

I'm gonna I gotta get a disagree with you there

Chuck. I gotta go with Raphael Arrow he mean

from what I've seen he has his moments But he

also has a moments a little bit of whining. He,

you know, he's got his girl problems. He, you

know, he's a little bit dramatic sometimes. Raphael

doesn't care about that type of stuff. That dude

just wants to be a rebel. He, you know, he to

me is a bigger badass. They all might be the

better character, more interesting, but when

it comes to levels of badass them in a badass

degree, I think Raphael has a master's. So I'm

going to go with Raphael on this one. Greg, what

do you say? Who are you going with? It's up to

you. You are the deciding vote. No pressure whatsoever.

But if whoever you vote will go up. This is like

the second or third time I've had the deciding

vote. But you changed it the first time. I don't

know. Raphael always came off a little bit emo

to me. I don't find emo people to be that badass.

Sorry, people at Hot Topic. They're very nice

in there, though. The people that work at Hot

Topic, they're very nice. They're just happy

to see a normal person. Oh, you don't have eyeliner

make up on thank god I did at one point. It's

a different story though. I don't know. I just

think surviving on an island like that like just

for survival and Not not having the training

that Raphael has and having that good father

relationship and Still going out there and like

kicking ass because Rafael has kind of a father

and master splinter. He's he's got a family that

kind of he could go and hug at night Where arrow

doesn't have really that support system, but

to be fair his father is a rat So, I mean that's

kind of badass within itself Yeah, kind of and

he lives in the sewer. I'm just giving it to

arrow. All right, so arrow moves on next up we

welcome Chuck We hit we talked about JCVD we've

talked about Rambo well, it's fortune anger gets

his turn next with Dutch his character from the

predator Going up against you know, the legendary

literally legendary because legends were inbound

him because that's How it's legitimate I guess

I don't know there was a joke that I was going

for and I missed it But we're gonna do anyways,

it is Dutch going against Achilles the Greek

warrior is a Greek. I don't you guys watch 300.

Is that right? It makes your experts anyway,

so Chuck you started last time Greg you ended

last time. So we'll start with you this time

Who is the bigger badass Achilles or Dutch from

Predator? Ah, I think you guys are gonna disown

me as a friend, but I haven't really watched

the Predator How dare you I know there's one

person that we talked to that's gonna be like,

hate me even more. I guess I'll have to talk

to his brother about it. But I seriously don't

know much about Dutch from Predator. It's Schwarzenegger,

right? It is Schwarzenegger. Schwarzenegger always

plays fricking pretty big badass except for Jingle

all the way or whatever the hell that movie was.

I'm gonna go with Achilles. Freaking Brad Pitt

just looks badass. He kind of goes a little wussy

part way through with the whole Woman even that

that portion of it. What is I'm sorry. You'd

say that again when he was yelling Hector Yeah,

that's your little girly to Actually, then you

kind of changed my mind. I'm gonna go touch I

am also actually you know what I'm not sure yet

I'm debating so check before I can decide I'm

gonna cheat and go to you who do you think is

the bigger badass Dutch or Achilles? I think

it's pretty badass that Dutch you know basically

stood in the face of an alien and a very scary

alien at that kind of showed no fear and still

attempted to hunt him down and everything I think

that's pretty badass. Not a lot of people would

have the gumption to do that. I do disagree on

the girly parts about Achilles. I think he was

maybe thrown a little bit of a temper tantrum

there, but he backed it up big time. Hector was

supposed to be the greatest warrior in Troy,

and he put up kind of a fight, but Achilles was

just toying with him. Achilles was really, really

badass in that movie. Even from the guy you fought

in the beginning Bo Agrias who was a freaking

giant Just kind of go with Achilles on this one

You know what you do, but you do bring up some

points there and to be honest Yeah, Dutch did

take down the predator, but he also kind of stumbled

upon it if it wasn't for the fact that he crawled

in mud He'd probably would be a dead man at this

point. I mean, but Achilles he also has that

heel I mean that that took him out and I just

remember seeing that movie And if you don't know

at the end, there's an arrow in his heel. And

then I hear people from the back here say to

me, oh, Achilles heel. I get it. I'm like, you

gotta be kidding me. Those people just instantly

lost this bracket. We should have had Achilles

face off against Arrow. I mean, this is tough.

I think both have their points. Both have their

advantages. But I think... I think I'm going

to go with Achilles. I do think he's more of

the warrior duping of a good point. He does take

down Hector like no tomorrow. He's a pretty big

legend, even if you don't even count the Brad

Pitt version of him. So we'll push on Achilles

the next round. Maybe we will get that Achilles

arrow matchup. He takes his step forward. He

does. We'll see how long that lasts. Heals first.

All right, next up, this is going to be an interesting

one for Chuck. So I gotta start with him because

I know these are two characters that you have

a pretty big love for, both of them. I don't

know one of them, so please everybody go before

me. The first one I know that, Greg, you of course

know this character. Yeah, I don't know this

character. I think the rest of the world will

know it even more very shortly, and that is of

course Thanos. Going up against maybe maybe not

the most popular character, but you know the

actor and that's Mark Wahlberg And he plays this

character in the movie shooter and that's Bob

Lee swagger and Chuck I know you're a big fan

of that movie I do enjoy that movie myself as

well, but I also know Thanos is one of your favorite

characters. So who do you think is the bigger

badass? This is this is a pretty tough matchup

for me I was kind of shocked when I saw these

facing off against each other. I was like, dang

it, that's a tough one. It's hard to go against

the guy that has swagger in his name. You know,

that is tough. Of course, he he kind of gets

framed by, you know, the U .S. government for

shooting the president. But this whole time,

he kind of had a backup plan going on and kind

of takes care of that and. Holds this ace up

his sleeve through the whole movie and you know

really takes care of business He was definitely

a major badass in that movie. I really do wish

that they Could somehow expand that franchise

even though. I'm not sure if it would work it

out, but What can I say I cannot go against one

of my favorite characters of all time? anywhere

that is Thanos he is just to me the probably

the biggest badass in the Marvel Universe and

One of the biggest badasses in all of comics

the guy once killed half the population of the

entire universe Basically undid it just because

he wanted to He was able to take on all the heroes

and in the infinity gauntlet and even a couple

of other stories he faced the major cosmic entities

in the comics and no one thought he would have

a chance to win, but he pulled up this miraculous

plan and Basically just had some fun with it

was toying with it and they say the good guy

always wins But it's usually not the case when

Thanos is involved. He usually does win. So I

gotta go with Thanos on this one Yeah, I think

you've done it off pretty well there and I don't

think I really need to add much So I'm just gonna

say I agree with Chuck and go on Thanos Greg,

what about you? Well since nobody made any really

good points about the other guy and the fact

that Thanos is But we're trying to get with death

itself is just incredibly badass. So Clean sweep

All right, moving on to the next round and so

next round we actually to have to I guess real

life one both historical figures in their own

right and that is Muhammad Ali the famous boxer

going up against William Wallace, they will not

take my freedom himself. But anyway, so we got

Muhammad Ali taking on William Wallace Who do

we think is the bigger badass? And I'll start

this one off, and I'm gonna go with Muhammad

Ali on this one, for the biggest reason that

he is the baddest man on the planet, one of the

biggest and best boxers of all time. That guy

ruled the ring for huge amounts of time, taking

down George Foreman in the jungle. There's no

one in the world that maybe had a bigger influence

on all the boxing than Muhammad Ali. Yeah, William

Wallace is pretty badass, the dude. was intense

like none of Mario, but at the end of the day,

he kind of failed. He didn't really succeed in

his goal and Muhammad Ali did. So I'm going Ali.

Greg, how about you? Who are you going with?

Just because he's the winner, I don't think necessarily

makes a person a badass or not. The fact that

William Wallace kind of won in his own way, man

got disemboweled. And he's like still sticking

with his morals and his gumption and that scene

is just intense and He led an army against overwhelming

odds. It's got to be William Wallace Alright,

so we got one Wallace. We got one Muhammad Ali

Chuck you're the deciding vote who you going

with I'm gonna have to go with William Wallace

on this one. I think Muhammad Ali is pretty badass

never really showed Any fear of anyone he was

willing to take on anyone in the ring, but I'm

not sure of his ability to Like lead a group

of men or motivate an army or anything like that

Like William Wallace was when he did that movie.

It was pretty impressive. I gotta go with William

Wallace All right on to our next matchup. We

have Indiana Jones Harrison Ford himself going

up against Xena the warrior princess No, it wasn't

manly enough just because her voice is a little

bit deeper than that that was mean anyway Chuck

you ended last round. So let's let you start

this round. Who wins this one Indiana Jones going

again to Zena I think I'm gonna have to go Indiana

Jones on this one. I think he is just way too

resourceful for Zena to compete with I think

he He uses anything and everything at his disposal

to kind of get him out of jams and whoever you

may be fighting. I know Zena's pretty badass

with that, you know, little metal coil thing

that she throws. I don't think it compete with

an Indiana Jones. All right. And I'm going to

have to go ahead and agree with you there, Chuck.

Zena's pretty tough. She's a warrior princess

for sure. But Indiana Jones, you can't get much

tougher than Indiana Jones. That dude. Minus

his fear of snakes though. I mean that to me

fear of snakes makes him more manly if anything

Thanks, Dan I also I also hate snakes So but

mean that dude he is a venture of all adventurers

to me one of the biggest bad bad ass moments

in movie history Raiders of the Lost Ark. This

was the sword battle the dick guys going all

crazy Fighting up with the sword doing all his

moves. What does Harrison Ford do shoots the

guy in cold blood? that to me is badass so i'm

going with indiana jones greg what say you what

they said moving on with indiana jones next round

i will start this one off because it's kind of

hits me in in two areas and that with Eric Cartman

for the South Park one of my favorite cartoons

my favorite cartoon of all time going up against

Lawrence LT Taylor I'm a big Giants fan and Lauren

shell is one of the biggest badasses in football

history. Did you change the game for sure? I

Mean he's got his other off -the -field issues.

Of course. He's a big fan of crack as we all

know he can't get enough But even what that said

Eric Cartman's pretty hard to beat when it comes

to badass resume that guy has done that kid I

should say has done quite a bit and I'll save

it for next round because I think I'm pretty

sure he'll go on but if I need to say more I

will but coming from a Giants fan so that means

a lot a big Giants fan I gotta I gotta give it

to Eric Cartman he's the bigger badass Greg what

do you have to say that didn't Lawrence Taylor

also have something with he was like some kind

of underage Children kind of thing. He's had

a lot of issues. He's been that kind of instantly

takes like Any badass credibility away from him?

I think so. I'm gonna go with Eric Cartman I'm

I also have something that I was thinking of

for Eric Cartman that that could take them pretty

damn far So I'll also save that since we're both

kind of voting for him. I think that should be

saved So Chuck, clean sweep. Are you going with

LT? I definitely would have to go with LT here

because you guys are probably gonna Dislike me

for this, but I hate South Park. I cannot stand

it. I think just if you watch a highlight reel

of Lawrence Taylor I mean that that's gonna say

it all I'm using the logic just of him like on

the field basically on the football field the

dude was just really really badass and a lot

of offensive linemen who tend to be bigger were

Gotta lose and sleep at night before they had

to go up against this guy. So I Know I'm in a

losing effort, but I'm gonna go LT. All right.

All right And the last round matchup for this

this round and we're going Samuel L Jackson himself

against the sailor man Popeye Chuck we ended

you with you last time. Let's start with you

here. Who is a bigger badass Samuel L Jackson

or Popeye? I used to love Popeye cartoons when

I was a kid. I used to watch them all the time

and Needless to say it still did not get me to

eat spinach, but um Hated that crap But anyway,

I think I think Samuel Jackson takes this one.

I think he could take it on like speech alone

I think he could like I think he'd intimidate

Popeye or something like just give that speech

from like Pulp Fiction or something and you know

Don't know Popeye would just pee his pants or

something Say what again I'll go next and I gotta

I gotta agree with you there Chuck and Popeye

The dude had forearms like no tomorrow, but I

get those checked out not it's a tumor It's a

good chance, but I mean Samuel Jackson you can't

get much bad -ass more badass than Samuel Jackson

Like he said just his voice even his Apple commercial

with Siri was pretty badass and he was just acting

normally So I'm gonna go with Samuel Jackson

great dinner for his wife Yeah, but it was a

badass dinner. So What say you Samuel Jackson

or Popeye the sailor man? I think wasn't Samuel

Jackson like a part of Black Panthers or some

kind of organization like that. I That I don't

know I thought he was involved in some organization

before he Really got into acting but for that

which may be real or not. I'm gonna put him ahead

Alright, so what's a suite for Samuel Jackson

so That's all the first round matches, so we're

actually going to go to the second round of this

side of the bracket. It's going all the way back

up to the top to our good old friend, Batman.

Taking on the winner of the Katniss Everdeen

JCVD battle, which was of course Katniss Everdeen.

So who is the bigger badass? Batman or Katniss?

Ugh, Batman vs. Kat. Who are we going with, Greg?

I'm seeing both of them hooking up in my head

for some reason. Are you making your own fan

fiction right now? Yes, actually. I'd have to

switch out Batman with me at some point. I don't

know. I hate to do it. I'd like to see Katniss

go farther, but I'm gonna go with... Batman and

his brooding and all those freaking gadgets the

freaking vehicles that he's got all she has is

a bow and arrow And I know you're gonna pick

her anyway, so I feel a little bit better that

she'll be picked at some point because Dan's

whiffed I'm joking by the way, but but it's not

wrong But I I'm gonna go for Katniss not just

because of that but You know, Batman is tough,

there's no doubt about it. But think about it,

like, Candace is just a farmer girl from a poor

town. I feel like I'm running a journey song.

Who is going to a battle? She volunteers for

her sister. I mean, she risks her life to save

her sister. That's pretty, that's pretty badass

that she'll do that. Like I said, and she's just

this normal person who takes up a responsibility.

She doesn't have special training. She's not

a millionaire or billionaire. Because if Batman

wasn't a billionaire, would he be Batman? I don't

know. Katniss literally has nothing, and she's

coming from nothing and becoming something. I

think that says a lot. So I'm going with Katniss.

So one for Katniss, one for Batman. Chuck, it's

up to you who wins this. We know who he's going

to pick. Come on. I'm going to make it short

and sweet, and I'm going to say Batman. Do you

want to know why? Does anyone want to know why?

Because he's Batman. Where are the other drugs

going? Though, alright, fittingly enough, after

talking about Batman, we go to the Joker, going

up against Rambo. Oh wow. Chuck, we added you

with you last time, so we'll start with you here.

Who's winning this, Joker or Batman? Or sorry,

Joker or Batman? Joker or Rambo? Was that a Florian

slip? I don't know. I know what Dan's hoping

for. Wow, this is tough. They're they're both

really really badass characters. I think this

is the first First really tough decision that

I've had so far. Oh boy. I think I am going to

go with Rambo just because I think he He knows

the risks involved and he does them anyway And

I think Joker's just psychotic and he really

doesn't care what happens to him. I think He's

just a nut. I think Rambo Amber was more badass

because he knows the danger and... It's more

of a conscious decision, right? Right, he chooses

to do that, so... Joker kind of has to be a goofball.

An insane weirdo, so... Greg, do you agree you're

going Joker or you're going Rambo? This is really

hard. That's what she said. I kind of want to

go Joker. Just kind of for the the same thing

as Chuck said but opposite I Don't really know

how to back that up to be quite honest Just the

shit that he does is so insane that it's badass

and the fact that he's walking around in purple

He's walking around in a purple outfit the entire

time with this weird bowtie To go out in public

like that is also pretty impressive. So I'm going

to go for the joker. Oh, man. I was hoping you'd

make the decision for me, Greg, but I guess.

Sorry. So we got one joker. It comes down to

this. Yeah, part of me wants that joker matchup

just for next round, but I think that's unfair.

You got to look at joker. You got to look at

Rambo. Joker does some crazy things, but are

they bad ass crazy or are they just crazy crazy?

Rambo. I mean that guy literally fought an entire

army by himself with muscles and a machete and

a headband and I gotta go I think I'm gonna go

with Rambo simply based off the fact that no

one could put on a headband nearly as badass

as Rambo that dude can like he tightens it like

no tomorrow as much as I want to see that Batman

versus Joker matchup I'm gonna I'm gonna have

to go with a little bit of the upset here and

go with Rambo Rambo is moving on The Rambo versus

Batman also not that bad of a matchup, so...

Alright, Greg, again, you might have to fight

for your man again this round. And that is with

Stewie Griffin going up against the infamous

Brock Sampson. Greg, we'll start with you. Who

do you think is the bigger badass? It's Brock

Sampson, of course. He doesn't use... The only

weapon that he really uses to fight people are

his hands and a freaking knife. It doesn't really

use much other than that. And he's fought people

naked. That's pretty fricking badass. So is Borat,

though. But has he been covered in blood from

head to toe while naked fighting people because

he's just like killed so many people, taken out

so many bad guys? That I don't know. That might

be in the Borat sequel. OK, well, Brock has done

that. and he deals with all these things that

are just way far out there and that could drive

other men insane. He has dealt with that. He's

gotten beat up probably much more than Stewie

has and that's just when he's trying to make

love with his girl that always gets away, his

girl that he's always longing for. There are

scenes leading up to them not being able to because

she's saving herself for marriage their scenes

together are quite brutal and Brock gets all

sorts of ladies Stewie doesn't get any ladies

because we're not sure which way Stewie's kind

of leading with his sexual preferences even though

being gay doesn't mean if make you badass one

way or the other but in my male -centric mind

it makes it little bit more badass if you get

the ladies. So I'm voting Brock. Okay. Chuck,

what do you say? You on Stewie? You're going

or has... Have I beaten you down yet, Chuck?

I'm like, Cameron, wait, please vote Brock. Sorry.

No, I'm going to have to go Stewie this one.

I think he, I mean, he made clones of himself

and they all traveled to time and screwed up

the entire time stream. And he didn't really

even care. Like it didn't faze him. I think just

that calm demeanor about, you know, no matter

what happens, he's, you know, going to find a

way out of it. I think Stewie is more badass

in this case. This is tough. I'm not sure which

one to go with, but I look at it this way. What's

more badass of a name? Stewie Griffin or Brock

Sampson? Brock Sampson, it sounds like a porn

star name, but in all the right ways. So he's

probably actually starred in the porno. Maybe,

who knows? But I'll go with Brock. I'll keep

that train going. Though I don't know how much

longer that train's gonna last, but we'll see.

I'm gonna have to keep sending Chuck videos.

And I'm gonna have to keep not watching. Alright,

next up. This one is gonna be tough. I still

don't know who I'm gonna go with. And that is

Michonne versus James Bond. Man, this to me is

like James Bond's worst nightmare coming back

to haunt him. A woman I don't think he's gonna

be able to swoon. Man, I am a James Bond fan,

but... Oof, this is tough. When it comes to badassness,

no, I think James Bond is great. I think he is

one of the coolest men of all time. The guy has

swagger, the guy has charisma, he's got it all,

but when it comes to level badassness, I don't

think you can get much higher than Michonne.

Just her eyes alone and the grimace on her face,

it's enough, and I think... Unlike a lot of James

Bond villains that kind of explain everything

and let him get away but shown would just like

knock his head off immediately Though I mean

who's winning in a fight, but I just I just think

she's that type of badass So I gotta go with

Michonne Chuck or so I'll actually know I'll

move over to Greg's Greg. I know you're a big

Bond fan So Greg, what do you say you go in Michonne

you go in James Bond? I'm not sure how far James

Bond would be able to make it through the zombie

apocalypse He'd probably just go into a cave

somewhere and get locked up like one of those

government safe house type and apocalypse end

of the world type places. He'd probably be in

there. I don't think he'd be out and about in

the apocalypse. Plus two words, pet zombies.

So I'm going to go with Michonne. Chuck, do you

agree or are you going to go with Bond, James

Bond? I'm going to make it a clean sweep. I'm

going to go with Michonne. I think. Think with

bond I don't know you take that you take away

that security of his gadgets and just kind of

his resources and I think he's gonna get a little

scared and honestly if Michonne has the chance

to End something or take care of something. She's

not gonna hesitate at all. So I I think she is

more badass All right. All right on to the next

round. Well, this is another really hard one

It's getting tough as we get going along here

and that is Brian Mills from taken against arrow

Chuck, you ended last time. We'll start with

you here. Who are you going with? This really

is a tough one. Hit the nail on the head there.

I think I'm still going to have to go Aero though.

I think he... I don't know. I mean, I know Brian

Mills has a history in intelligence and security

detail and undercover agents and stuff like that,

but... We don't see much of that, and I think

Arrow has a bigger backstory, and it's more fleshed

out. And there's more examples of his badassness,

so to speak. I think I'll go with Arrow. All

right. Greg, what say you? Oh, God. These are

really getting tough. I'm going to go with Ryan

Mills. He's he's gone through the training. He's

probably had a lot of badass missions beforehand

that they kind of implied in the first taken

and Arrow is just kind of that was a rich snotty

kid So I'm gonna go with Brian Mills I'll put

it this way when arrow makes a call in order

to sound more badass He uses a voice modulator

when Brian Mills makes a call. He uses his voice

He has no need for a voice modulator. You know,

that's all he's got. So I'm gonna go Brian Mills

as the bigger badass. Moving on to the next round,

we have Achilles versus Thanos. I ended last

round, I'll start this one. This one honestly

is probably one of the easier ones this round.

Achilles is great and all, but freaking Thanos,

like come on now, honestly. Thanos would crush

Achilles with a pinky. You take all of Achilles'

greatest feats and match them up against Thanos

and Thanos could do that in a day. So we're going

to go with Thanos on this one. Chuck, what do

you say? I got to go with Thanos. When it's that

clear in my mind that it's just, I don't know,

written in the cards, I guess. Thanos is head

and shoulders above Achilles, I think, with not

only all of his accomplishments, just like the

level of opponents he's faced and defeated. and

basically humiliated. So go with Thanos for that

reason. All right. Moving on to the next one.

Sorry, no. Greg, I'm skipping you on this one.

Are we making it a clean sweep? Are you going

with Thanos or are you going to go Achilles?

Yeah, because I think Thanos could just pee on

Achilles' heel and Achilles would just fall over

dead. Unless he's like R. Kelly and it makes

him stronger. Anyways, all right. On to the next

round. We have William Wallace taking on Indiana

Jones. We ended with you, Greg, last time. Let's

start with you here. Who's winning this battle?

Who's a bigger badass? I'm going to sum it up

in one word. Disembowelment. Thank you and good

night. So you're going William Wallace. Chuck,

what say you? Let's see. Who was it again? Indiana

Jones and William Wallace? And William Wallace,

Braveheart himself. I don't know. I'm going to

go Indiana Jones, I think. that's still sticking

in my mind, just that resourcefulness. I mean,

he is not afraid to use anything within his grasp

to accomplish his mission and take down his villain.

So got to go Indiana Jones. So we got one Wallace,

one Jones. My vote is the deciding factor. I'm

going to go with Indiana Jones just because he

is the best punch in movie history. Honestly,

that smack is pretty amazing. So let's go with

Jones on that one as we move on to the next round.

Next up and this is freaking tough at least for

I think at least for me. I don't know I think

Chuck I know you're answered this one already,

but that is Eric Cartman from South Park going

up against Samuel L. Mother effing Jackson Man,

this is tough Samuel Jackson. It's pretty hard

to get more badass than him. But does Eric Cartman

do that? I got this is tough Eric Cartman made

a kid eat his parents. Eric Cartman... And one

of them was his father. I've just found out.

Yeah. The amount of stuff that he has done...

It is pretty insane. But Samuel L. Jackson, though,

if you think badassness is an attitude, and part

of it, it's gotta be, part of it's an attitude.

Eric Cartman also can get one -upped once in

a while. Eric Cartman can kind of screw you guys

and go on home type of attitude, but... I think

I think I'm going to go with this is tough. This

is debatable. I can go either way. But my heart

goes to Eric Hartman just slightly. But I could

be swayed with a good argument. So, Chuck, what

say you? What is your vote? You probably know

my vote, but it's Samuel L. Jackson, the guy

just I mean, just listen to him talk. I mean,

it's just way too intimidating. I think He's

even he's even gracious in losing or something.

He literally would just say eff it I don't care,

you know, the guy got eaten by a shark and somehow

made it look cool, you know Wasn't wimpy wasn't

wimpy like Quint from Jaws or anything or he

was going out screaming or anything He was literally

like cursing when he got eaten by the shark.

So Gotta go Samuel L. Jackson. Oh That is a good

point. Oh I'm still debating I could I could

I could change my mind. I'm not sure Greg. What

is your folk? Oh, you go in Cartman you go in

Jackson. I think I'm gonna go Cartman I think

he'd have Samuel Jackson yelling into Cartman's

face and Cartman just cursing profusely back

into Samuel Jackson's and Standing his ground

and that's what he always does. He stands his

ground. He forges ahead no matter whether he's

he's wrong or right he just Gets done what he

has to get he does what he has to get done And

he just follows through and that's pretty freakin

badass respect my authority. I Think I will and

Cartman's moving on it's uh Say it ain't so It's

gotta it is it's it's an upset. It's I don't

know I feel big Samuel Oh would be making it

to the final four I know I don't feel great about

it, but I can't I can't argue against it. I Anyway,

so we're back up top back I think that this would

be sweet 16. I don't even know. I have too many

numbers to count. I'm not a mathematician. We're

just going to look grass ties in when you need

them. Anyways, next matchup. We didn't get the

Batman versus Joker matchup, but we did get Batman

versus Rambo. And Greg, you ended last round,

so you'll start here. Who do you go with, Batman

or Rambo? Who is the bigger badass? Rambo fought

his own people even a little bit at the end.

That's a tough one. It's hard. It is. that's

what she said um still going with that joke you

could place it any place and that is also what

she said put it anywhere trying to explain how

like the winner in my head is just so insane

at this point batman has cooler shit going on

for him he's got freaking batmobiles out the

ying yang he's got money he's got the awesome

pad he's got Parents died, but he's still kicking

ass I'm going with Batman All right. We got one

for Batman. You know what? I haven't voted for

Batman once yet and that's gonna not change I'm

going with Rambo again. I'm saying Batman's an

awesome character But when it comes to level

of badassness, you know, Rambo is a crazy mofo

I mean Rambo took on an entire army with a gun

and that's pretty much it. Like I said Rambo

puts on a headband like no tomorrow he's got

he's got the look of a badass character he might

be a little bit cheesy he might be a little bit

crazy but i think that craziness makes him a

badass so i'm going rambo chuck we got one for

rambo we got one from batman is the bat going

down or is he reigning supreme what what say

you i'm gonna push batman forward on this i think

He has just faced more intimidating opponents.

I mean, the guy stood up against Darkseid, you

know, in the Superman Batman Supergirl story

or the animated one, which was called Apocalypse.

He got the better of Darkseid. He stole his security

codes or something like that and basically just

stood in Darkseid's face and Darkseid could squash

him like a bug, literally, physically. And he

didn't even bat an eye, no pun intended. But

just got to go with Batman there. Alright, so

Batman is moving on. Next up, Brock Sampson against

Michonne. Chuck, we'll start with you. You've

heard all Greg's arguments for Brock Sampson.

He's not going to change his. I know he's not.

You also heard about, but you also know Michonne.

Are you going to finally go Brock or are you

going with Michonne? I'm going with Michonne

just because of the sword. I mean, who is that

badass with a sword? It's tough. I mean, he's

badass with a knife, though. I don't know who

he is. Greg, who are you going with? You going

with Brock? You going with Michonne? Brock Samson.

And Greg, you make a lot of good points. I do

think Brock Samson has a lot going for him. But

at the end of the day, to me, man, Michonne just

got that edge to her that it's just I don't want

to mess with. I don't, you know, she. Again,

I mean you talked about what he's got a knife,

but that's not a knife. Michonne's got a knife.

So I'm gonna Brock Stamson. I think he's a good

run for a character that Chuck and I aren't really

aware of. He's gone pretty far. Unfortunately,

his run has come to an end. So we're gonna go

with you both. It's okay, Greg. It's okay, Greg.

Michonne is moving on. Next up we have Brian

Mills from Taken. Against Thanos. I ended the

last round so I'll start this one and I don't

even know who I want to go with with this. Holy

crap. Oh man, Brian Mills or Thanos. Man, it's

hard to beat Liam Neeson, but if anyone could

do it, it's Thanos. I think he doesn't have a

particular set of skills. He's got all the skills.

That dude's got him. He's got intelligence. He's

got panas. He's got power. He's got everything.

And I don't think even a throat punch would hurt

him, even Liam Neeson. So I'm going to have to

go with Thanos. It pains me. It pains me because

I was hoping for Brian Mills to the finals. But

with this matchup, I don't think he can take

it. Greg, who are you going with? You got Brian

Mills, you got Thanos. Kind of want to go Brian

Mills just to spite Chuck for last round. I'm

kidding. I'm going to go with Thanos like it.

He's taking on way higher odds. He's doing it

with his mind to not just his physical ability.

And plus, he's serious. He's the whole fact that

he is trying to get with death. Just like that

is badass. Like guys on bikes, on motorcycles

driving down the street think that's pretty badass.

I bet even though he's a comic book character,

they're going to be like, yeah, it's pretty badass.

And for anybody that wouldn't understand that,

it's that's the physical embodiment of death,

which appears to him as a woman. So. Junk you

make it in a clean sweep. Are you gonna try to

convince us that Brian Mills is the bigger badass?

I think I'm gonna sweep it gonna get my broom

out here. I Just think This might be a little

bit of foreboding a little foreshadowing I don't

know if it's gonna come to this but I think if

there's one guy who prepares more than Batman

I think it's Thanos this guy like just anticipates

everything. I don't think there's I think there's

any level of Badass that Brian Mills could bring

to compete with Thanos. All right, moving on

to next round. We're getting to it here. We got

Indiana Jones versus Eric Cartman. Chuck, you

ended last round. Let's start with you here.

Who are you going with? Indiana Jones. No surprise

there. Greg, who are you going with? Indiana

Jones or Eric? Respect my authority, Cartman.

He had somebody eat his own parents that is just

freaking well Actually, I'm not even sure if

I should really use that as an argument. He was

a cop at age However, like he's in like the third

grade and he was a cop for his city. That's pretty

badass and just his persistence I'm gonna go

with carbon man. This is tough. Reach of the

horse arc is one of my favorite films South Park

one of my favorite cartoons Eric Cartman, one

of my favorite cartoon characters. The dude's

a modern day Archie Bunker. He, like, fights

against the PC like no tomorrow. Indiana Jones,

though, that dude will go, you know, head first

to any adventure, jumping on tanks, going crazy.

Oof, I don't know, but you know what? In Indiana

Jones' Last Crusade, he lost a woman to his dad.

Though his dad was Sean Connery, so that almost

makes him more of a badass. Your dad, Sean Connery.

Jeez, so many ways to go here. At the end of

the day though, if you look at the amount of

badassness in badass things that someone has

done, you can't really beat what Cartman has

done, so I'm gonna keep that Cartman train rolling.

Don't know how far it's gonna go, but for now,

we're gonna go with Eric Cartman onto the next

round. Little bit of surprise there. This next

round, we're into the final four of tonight.

Who knows who's gonna take this battle, but it's

a good one. I think this one's actually pretty

tough. And that is Batman versus Michonne. And

I'm gonna keep my streak going. I'm going with

Michonne again. I think I've voted for her every

time so far and I've voted against Batman every

time. That's not changing. Yeah, Batman is tough,

but freaking Michonne would kill him. Would Batman

survive a zombie apocalypse if he doesn't kill

people? I don't know. Would he kill zombies?

I don't know his moral code. But they're already

dead though. True, maybe he would. He'd just

have the Batarangs that would help, but... Just

think he has she has an attitude to her that

Batman doesn't Batman can get a little bit emo

at times let's be honest like Yeah, his parents

died, but Michelle and so did like everyone in

the world that Michelle lives her kid died She

you know she doesn't really cry about it every

single day She does what she needs to do to survive

so again an attitude alone gotta go with Michelle

Chuck what say you you go on my show and you

go on Batman This is this is another tough one

for me I think I'm gonna go Batman though just

because just the intimidation factor and conversely

the fact that he doesn't get intimidated. You

know you use the argument that he gets a little

emotional at times but honestly I've seen Michonne

break down a couple times too and I think Batman

is seasoned and he's aware of that part of his

psyche and he knows how to handle it and I just

gotta go with Batman. All right, great. We got

one Batman when I'm a shown who you're going

with crap. I'm deciding factor That is your new

nickname deciding factor. I Think Batman would

be able to survive the zombie apocalypse Just

as well as she does the zombie pets pretty badass

I'm still gonna have to go with with Batman and

does not really give that great of an explanation

why but I I think Batman is like Chuck said he's

encountering way worse than the zombie apocalypse

With some of the villains he goes up against

All right, Batman moves on to the final two for

tonight, you know, really Greg though if you're

if your answer is Batman Do you really need a

good reason pretty much? No, no No matchup we

have Thanos versus Eric Cartman which I would

love to see that episode of South Park. I'm just

saying I think it would be amazing But Greg you

finished last round. So we'll start with you

here who you going with Thanos or Eric Cartman.

I think if Eric Cartman was be like, oh here

here Eric tears tears death over here. You want

to go on a date with death? I think he would

literally piss himself Thanos All right, Chuck

who you going with I think I might have an idea

If there ever was a predictable outcome, this

would definitely be it for me. I gotta go Thanos

on this one. I don't know much about Cartman

and South Park, but from what I have seen, I

was not impressed. But I am well -versed in the

history of Thanos, and that guy just, his picture

appears next to badass in the dictionary for

me. I will say this. If there's anyone who's

done more evil things in the world than Thanos,

it is Eric Cartman. That guy has given his friend

AIDS. He has pretty much done it all. He is one

evil, evil man. He started a cult. He's done

everything you could possibly do. Is that necessarily

badass though or is that just rotten? That's

a good point. In the way he does it and gets

it kind of away with it and still has it work

at the end. I would say there is some badassness,

but I do think, though, he does have a little

bit of a whiny side, as I said. You know, if

things don't go his way, he can get kind of crazy

and screw those you -guys -I -am -going -home

type of attitude. So, and it's Thanos. I mean,

I love Cartman, but I think this is as far as

he goes. I think this is the end of the line

for Cartman, so Thanos is moving on. So this

is the final matchup for tonight and it is a

hard one and I'm not even sure who I'm gonna

go with. I kind of thought maybe would go this

route. I thought possibly that these two characters

would go really far. Not too surprising they're

here tonight at the final two and that of course

is Batman and like the man we just talked about,

Thanos. And I ended last round so I will... start

this one, and I've been going against Batman

from every moment, which is so weird. I'm not

against Batman. I like Batman. Batman's amazing.

He's a great character. He, the dude is, he is

the knight. Everything about him, his persona

is just wreaking in badassness. But then you

have Thanos. The dude literally destroyed the

universe. The guy, and he rebuilt it like you

said, Chuck. The guy does anything he wants.

He's that badass level of He doesn't really care.

You know, he'll do whatever would be said he'll

keep goes after death. He'd court staff He's

the big bad of Marvel, but Batman's a big good

of DC He you know, he is the superhero superheroes

So it's hard to say I mean and Batman has no

superpowers It's easy to take over the universe

when you have superpowers Batman's just a dude

and he goes up against Darkseid which is you

know, the who Thanos is inspired by and if he

can go against Darkseid He'd probably go against

Thanos. So, he survived the Unibemes, he survived

death. He's killed kids in action! I mean, multiple

Robins have died and his role under his watch

and he keeps going. I'm gonna buck my trend and

I'm gonna go with Batman. I do think the fact

that he can stand up and go toe -to -toe with

someone like Thanos and not blink an eye, that's

pretty badass. So, I'm going Batman. Chuck, what

say you? This this is tough kind of thought it

would come down to this, you know Go figure with

a couple of comic nerds doing a bracket like

this that would come down to Batman and Thanos

Wow, Batman is He definitely, you know comes

to mind when you think badass It's just some

of the people he stood up against but I think

Thanos has really stood up to you know threats

and enemies on a consistent basis that are way

above what Batman has and I think just that experience

alone and the confidence that it gives Thanos

and like I mentioned before if there is anyone

out there that plans things more to a T than

Batman does I think it would be Thanos just by

his schemes that I've read before so it's really

really super close I would have to give the edge

slightly to Thanos Oh, Greg, you have been the

deciding factor tonight on so many different

levels. And of course, before we end tonight,

you're again the deciding factor. We have Thanos,

one vote. We have Batman, one vote. Who was going

to the finals? Who was going to face off against

next week's champion? Is it Batman? Is it Thanos?

What say you? I'm deciding. I'm deciding. That

we're gonna hear my answer next week. All right,

so After these messages, we'll be right back

Anyways Greg, I'm gonna have to put you on the

spot. You can you can flip a coin You could close

your eyes and in points you can throw a dart.

I Think honestly either answer is a valid answer

We gone I'm going Thanos. Batman is pretty badass.

But I've heard of an incident where I've heard

that Batman has pissed his pants. I'm not sure

if people go along with that storyline because

it's not the new 52. Well, it's not the new 52.

And it was kind of a separate standalone story,

I believe. Plus, it was a Kevin Smith story that

he did. And so I'm not sure. that makes it count

into the actual universe but uh Thanos essentially

became a god for the most part tearing down the

universe building it back up and the only person

that really beats Thanos is Thanos I believe

I've read that in one of the comics that the

only way he ever beats himself ever gets beaten

is because of his own self his own mind he's

literally just Beats himself. That's and that's

pretty badass that the only person that can beat

you is you Yeah, yeah sounds a little dirty but

yeah I would also add to that I know we talked

a lot about Batman's parents and you know maybe

that being a weak point and stuff and his psyche

and I'd like to point out that Thanos chose to

kill his own mother to kind of achieve his own

means So, you know that should factor into it

right there for Thanos Yeah, so I of course the

one time I vote for Batman you you guys go the

other way I Can't switcheroo on you there. Yeah.

Yeah, you'll have that. You know what? It's gonna

be hard to beat Thanos with everything. We've

he's gone through he's beaten Batman He's being

Eric Cartman. He's being Brian Mills and he's

beat Achilles and he's beaten Bob Lee swagger

Probably maybe not the most common complex one,

but still whoever's gonna go up against him has

a lot to prove and though we might have some

men for the job and some ladies for the job and

next week we'll be talking about who's on the

other side of the bracket which is a mystery

at this point but they give you a little bit

of a hint we have the good we have the bad we

have the ugly next week we have men of the iron

face we have those who can survive in Every element

possible we have people who have created and

just mastered different universes. We have people

who have survived Apocalypses we have people

have we have crazy bandits. We have villains

We have we have pretty much everything you could

possibly imagine coming up next week, but before

we go We'd like to end each episode with a special

letter and this week Chuck is already on his

second letter already and Chuck you want to just

give it a little bit of description of what you'll

be talking about Yes, I'm gonna be writing to

a comic book writer by the name of Jim Starlin

if you're not familiar with him He has worked

primarily for Marvel over the years even was

an artist sometimes but mostly Mostly he's a

writer. He has done a little DC work, but pretty

much sticks to Marvel And fittingly enough, he's

best known for creating the character of Thanos.

However, he's also created characters like Drax

the Destroyer and Gamora, which will be appearing

in the Guardians of the Galaxy movie this summer,

and I'm sure he'll probably get a decent cut

of the profits from that movie. Okay, so my letter

to Jim Starlin. This is more of a positive one,

as my last letter was kind of negative. Dear

Jim Starlin, I rate you on this fine day with

the intentions of thanking you. I would like

to thank you for the terrific stories you have

provided to countless Marvel readers throughout

the 80s and 90s. In particular, I would like

to thank you for the creation of the Thanos character

in the story titled Thanos Quest and its subsequent

companion Infinity Gauntlet. These stories captivated

me in my early reading of Marvel comics. For

some reason, these stories more so than any others

piqued my interest and appealed to my imagination.

The sheer tact and strategy involved in Thanos'

quest to collect the Infinity Gems just really

fascinated me. I had always read plenty of comics

with superhero team -ups and fantastic action

sequences, but the strategy and intelligence

behind the Thanos quest was unlike anything I

had ever read. I couldn't get enough. And to

accompany that intelligence behind this story

came the sprawling action and team ups of the

Infinity Gauntlet. It was quite a combination,

and that is what makes it one of my all time

favorites. I would also like to thank you for

signing my Infinity Gauntlet number one issue.

I'm not the only cat in the world that has one,

but it's pretty cool to me to have one of my

all time favorite comics signed by the author.

As it were, I took advantage of the short lines

in the Baltimore Comic Con last year, and it

was the highlight of the show for me. You were

very friendly and not stuck up in any way. I

remember you saying your favorite Thanos stories

that you wrote were the Death of Captain Marvel

and Thanos Quest. Both excellent choices in my

opinion. One thing I would have liked to ask

you would be how gratifying must it feel to have

your character Thanos up on the big screen at

the end of Avengers. And how proud you must feel

for Thanos and the Infinity Gauntlet to sort

of be the secret story behind it all. I can only

imagine that you have a great sense of satisfaction,

like when you complete a major project and gaze

upon it with pride and fulfillment. And so I

tip my hat to you, Mr. Starlin, for capturing

my interest with your writing, and for sparking

my love of giant crossover stories. I hear you

are working on some new stuff with Marvel, so

I am looking forward to checking that out. Because

what can I say? No one knows Thanos like you

since you created him. So I can't wait for your

new material. Until then... Keep filling that

infinity well with great ideas. Sincerely, Chuck.

Well, that proves it. The bracket was fixed.

Jim Starlin has paid for this episode. He has

paid Chuck to make Thanos go through and he has

paid Chuck for that letter. This is like the

Whitesnake scandal all over again. My complaints

in the early round of the bracket were just a...

a big ruse you know it was it was me that had

it fixed all along as i was taking after my one

of my favorite characters very nice very nice

but yeah hopefully you guys enjoyed it let us

know what you guys think uh let us know you know

what we got wrong who do you think should have

won that didn't did Thanos deserve being named

number one badass on this side of the bracket

anyways thank you for joining us for this week

we hope you appreciated it and enjoyed it as

much as we did and we'll even have more fun next

week when we finally determine who really is

the biggest badass. But for now, this has been

Chuck. This has been Greg, or Brock Sampson,

who should have won. And this has been Dan, who

didn't win and didn't deserve to win. And we've

been talking in circles. We'll see you next week.

I feel like I should patch down the back, Dan.

Oh, it's all right, Dan. Just because Bad Dan

was the last. first and only time that you voted

for him didn't get through. Greg, will you sing

for me? What's that? Will you sing for me? I

feel a little bit better, a little bit better.

Glad I could provide that for you, Dan. Yeah.

That took down my badass status right there singing

that song. things going for all you guys that's

not at all how you say that edit point all right

and welcome back today like i mentioned in the

beginning we will be counting down and not counting

down because that's not at all what we're doing

Man You're not counting we are we are battling

Excuse me for a sec. I'm getting right here.

That's what she said. Sorry. Oh She's supposed

to be the opposite of that. Um, sorry edit point.

I will be in it.