Transformers: Dark of the Moon Review

Hey, it's David Kay, voice of Beast Wars Megatron

and TFA Optimus, you're listening to the Geekcast

Radio Network. You're listening to All Things

Transformers, version 2 .0. This is a warning

to all who oppose me. Yes, you are listening

to the Transformers Dark of the Moon discussion.

Spoilers will be abroad. If you haven't seen

this film, you must do so immediately. Yes. Your

hosts Steve Megatron, TFG -1 Mike, Pecan Court

Michael, and Kevin Optimus Solo Thompson will

be... Delivering the news to you on the movie.

I'm discussing everything in between Hello and

welcome to all things transformers version 2

.0 episode 11 I am your split personality host

Steve Megatron Phillips joining me for this very

explorative discussion are my usual class band

of GCRN idiots. Yeah, and? It's not what it says

in the script, dammit. I know, I changed it to

hosts. From hosts. DFJ and Mike, hello. Hello.

Hello, it's Optimus Solo, or as Mike just termed

me earlier in the day, Optimus. What do you call

me? Optimus Asshole. Yes. Very nice First it's

the voice of Michael Wilson Hello, hello, hey,

how's it going? I was gonna say yeah, you gotta

wait till he does his little catchphrase. I know

I didn't get that in there. Hey, how's it going?

Before Steve really starts I do have to say one

thing This is the first time in the reformatted

version of ATTF that Kevin and Michael have actually

been on an episode Together yeah Yes Wow I see

we did last at first at last How about second

third nope those don't count Yes, and of course

today we are going to be discussing transformers

dark of the moon we're discussing pink Floyd

They do drop that reference in the movie. Several

times. Only they would have had a wall somewhere

in there. Are you talking about the third wall?

I can't get out. Yeah, so what we're gonna do

is we're gonna do a basic rundown. Starting off

with the box office. Good old box office. Would

anybody care to review? Well, so far it's been

doing pretty dang good. I think it's just broke

the top 50 of all time. Is that like 49 or 45

or something? It's the highest grossing film

so far. Of this year, yeah. Yeah, of 2011. I

was seeing something like 660 odd million total.

And I'm not sure if it's opened in China yet.

So they're still expecting money to come in from

China and Japan. And they're saying that if the

whole thing doesn't get derailed completely by

the last Harry Potter movie, which comes out

at midnight tonight, then Dark of the Moon could

be looking at over a billion dollars gross. The

domestic wise it's at 277 which puts it 49th

domestically. It's getting ready to Catch meet

the Fokker's and Worldwide it's at six hundred

ninety three million dollars and it's number

45 on the list just below Twilight And above

that is transformers the first film yeah, and

then above that is the twilight new moon So it's

easily going to pass the first film worldwide.

Yes. And it should pass the second one. The second

one's at 836 and it's at 693, so if it can squeak

out 200 more. I mean, it's only in its second

week. Or third week now, I guess. So it has some

time. I mean, I know they peter off pretty quickly,

but it's still pretty young. I mean, Harry Potter

will take some from it, but it'll keep going

for a little while. How long do you think it'll

be until they hit the 1 billion mark or close

to it before it gets booted out of theater? Well,

I don't see it getting booted out right away

I mean, I know Harry Potter is taking a lot of

screens and I know Captain America will be will

be coming out and taking some screens, etc But

I want to say the second one Was the second one

had about let's see 1 2 3 4 5 Six weeks before

it started to drop like big time and it was still

making a million into it's like 10th or 12th

week. So I mean this one's only in week three

So I'd say it's gets another 100 million by two

weeks in two weeks Pretty fair assessment. Yeah

And to preface this, I still have not actually

seen it in the theater. I will be doing that

Saturday. I've watched it twice, bootleg. Oh,

not in 3D? I don't. I will not see a movie in

3D. I would pay to see an IMAX before I'd see

it in 3D. Go see it. Well, it's IMAX 3D. Go see

it at the IMAX in 3D. No. 3d I will not do 3d

it's really cool and it hurts my eyes it's worth

it so we don't need a blind Megatron thank you

I'll buy that 2d glasses that looks like 3d glasses

and oh since we're talking about 3d stuff because

they have this in 3d real d and IMAX and 2d Yeah,

since we're talking about 3d stuff, did you guys

see the The dark of the moon transformers 3d

glasses No, that'd be the the infamous prime

mask. No Let me see if I can find it here. Oh

Those $200 sunglasses. Yes. Yeah Hold on. No,

they're they're really sharp. You look really

you guys keep going. I'll um the downside is

a blank here Yeah, the downside is that they're

$200, but I think they're made by like Oakley

or something They normally makes really really

nice sunglasses. So what I don't understand though

is the 3d sunglasses that you get in the theater

they specifically say on the little piece of

plastic they come in Does not protect from UV

radiation do not wear sunglasses and yet you

have this company who's making sunglasses that

double as 3d glasses and it makes me wonder just

how you know effective they're gonna be protecting

your eyes or do you just wear these in the theater

or maybe that's why they're two hundred dollars

because you would be the coolest looking guy

in the theater until you went outside and became

blind as a bat nobody wearing nobody wearing

3d glasses in the theater looks cool well you

really don't look cool if you've got a big optimus

prime mask on half your head i would consider

buying that i did okay now I believe, I just

sent you guys the link to the glasses on BigBadToyStore

.com. They're up for pre -order and they're not

coming out until the third quarter of the year

this year, but the price is $224 .99. Now, don't

get me wrong. I love Big Bad Toy Store. I understand

they have to have markup, but I believe someone

else got these for like $85 .90, something like

that. 280 to 224 bucks. That's a huge markup

Yeah Just for some 3d glasses that you're only

gonna use once Yeah, these are real decompatible

you could take them to any movie But I mean you

really have to see a lot of movies to make this

worth it and be honest They're not gonna give

you a discount at the theater if you bring your

own glasses. No, they're not So what you do is

you pay for 2D and then you walk into the 3D.

I think someone I know from TFY did that. In

college, I used to always go to see two movies,

but we won't go into that. It's not a drive -in

either. Exactly. So I think we've drilled that

into the ground. I think we'll jump into the,

like a quick, very quick overall overview of

the story. It's all yours Mike, botch it away

Everybody else sit back and enjoy The basic gist

of it is it it centers around the the United

States Russian space race, but instead of Just

having it the space race they they mark it around

an event of one of the Cybertronian ships crashing

And then, of course, we have to rescue Sentinel

Prime, but it turns out that Sentinel Prime switches

sides. Hello, Galvatron. Megatron is still a

bitch in this movie. And was even name -called

as so. Yeah. I do disagree with you calling Sentinel

Prime Galvatron, though. No, he's more... Okay,

well what I mean by that is it's the fact that

it's fucking Leonard Nimoy and oh yeah first

thing I hear is I Know Sentinel prime the character

in the movie is not Galvatron, but just the megatron

is almost The insane version of Megatron it's

kind of like Galvatron He's more like the burnt

Anakin Skywalker You know I gotta give the writers

credit this time around because the Decepticons

actually have a sneaky plan. Like, it's all this,

it's conspiracy done right instead of throwing,

you know, giant asses up in our faces in IMAX.

Um, you know... I think we get that anyway. No,

not in this movie we don't. Yes we do. except

this time it's a nice ass. Giant male asses from

Sector 7, okay? Are you happy now? I was happier

seeing her ass up on the screen. I know, exactly,

but that's my point. You know, you don't have

John Turturro's ass blazoned across the screen

this time around, thank God. It's all about getting

these pillars to make the space bridge, which

I don't know. Space bridge to bring Cybertron

to earth it's basically a g1 episode is what

this movie is and The human that helps them is

like dr. Arcavile But a more badass version of

dr. Arcavile, but he's a very rich Version that

doesn't look like a fugly mad scientist, right?

You know you also got Mike's favorite character

Sam trying to Convince everybody that the Autobots

aren't bad. It's a rehash g1 plotline. There

you go. Yeah speaking of g1 I was reading a review

that walkie did and he spelled it all out here.

Basically Megatron's master plan is about the

human trader and the Autobots being forced to

leave Earth by a spaceship and then the ultimate

doom was Decepticons want to bring Cybertron

to Earth and then at some point you've got Megatron

sitting in the Lincoln Memorial instead of Lincoln,

which is a scene right out of Atlantis Arise.

So you've got all these G1, I mean, they literally

just spread out a bunch of G1 episodes in front

of them and picked some really, really cool bits

and put them all into their script. And there's

some comic reference in here as well. Not only

did they use the autobots having to leave the

planet and blowing up the ship in G1. They used

it in the Dreamwave G1 comics. Sentinel Prime

is basically straight out of the comics. Sentinel

is basically like Nova Prime. Nova Prime sided

with the Decepticons and became evil so that

he could unite their race and keep them so they

could survive. That's what the gist of that is.

It's the same story with that. There's oh and

then Megatron being scrapped and it is kind of

like a hillbilly way that he's got in this film

it reminds me of One of the issues of the G1

Marvel comics Where he's kind of just floating

around he's got all this power and energy and

everything, but he's just kind of there Yeah

And then, of course, you have the rest of the

plot with, like we said, the Autobots going off

in the shuttle and exploding. We later find out

they're not on it, even though we obviously knew

that they weren't going to be on it. And then

it's just a race, basically, between the Autobots

and the humans against the Decepticons as far

as trying to stop them from bringing Cybertron

to Earth and destroying Earth. That's the gist

of the plot. I think there's nothing much more

to say. Not a whole lot of plot. It's kind of

a cobbled together you know storyline that's

meant mostly to bring a bunch of robots on screen

to fight each other and everything we just said

was in the first 60 minutes and then the rest

of the movie is the last battle yeah pretty much

destroyed chicago that might be the best part

of the movie it's like the longest battle ever

it's like war of the worlds where's tom cruise

when you need him yeah that was quite the long

battle scene that's for sure Now, talking about

the battle scene really quick before we move

on, Michael, did you get to see any of the filming

of that? I saw some filming in Chicago. I'm not

sure which parts it was. I remember around the

time that I was in Chicago, they were showing

pictures on TFW of Patrick Dempsey and Shia LaBeouf

fighting. And this is toward the end of the movie

where he's like you picked the wrong side and

he's kicking him off this concrete thing. Oh

Okay, cool at the at the end now I didn't see

that but I knew they were filming that like the

day before I got there and Yeah, Christy and

I were just kind of walking along and it's like

what the heck's going on over there at the bridge

and they had the whole thing closed off and you

could see the 3d cameras up on cranes And it

was really neat, but we didn't actually see what

was being filmed. We just saw a bunch of people

running and explosions I just remember hearing

from all my friends because I'm only about an

hour and a half from Chicago But I just remember

hearing from all my friends that live in Chicago

how pissed they were that they couldn't get anywhere

Everything was closed. Yeah, I remember my bus

route that went right down Oh heck what's the

name of that street? It went right down like

the middle of the loop No, and and all that was

closed so they could film on it and it was weird

how You know that you would see a an Autobot

something driving down a street and it's like

I recognize that street and then they turn a

corner and They're driving down another street

and it's like I recognize that street too, and

it's on the other side of the loop They make

it look like you turn the corner and he's there

but that's not really how the city's laid out

Movie magic, you know, yes movie magic As far

as first impressions for me I And I'm gonna say

this a lot in this episode But I'm gonna say

at least twice and you know we'll get into it

more later in M wire special episodes But anything

is better than revenge of the fallen Anyway Disagree

anyway, let's not go there, but I went into this

really Cautiously optimistic Everything cuz as

we're recording a transformers podcast. We are

up on the news a lot of the time So, you know

and we've reported on the news since the movie

was announced You know, so everything I had seen

up to up to the point of going to actually see

the movie I was excited for there wasn't anything

that that I saw that I was like, oh Holy hell,

what is Michael Bay done now to that giant metal

bug? I know I was waiting for you to laugh at

that The end jokes they're coming to get you

yes, I Really enjoyed this I I didn't go into

it with too many expectations We all know Michael

Bay movies don't revolve around story. They revolve

around explosions and military jets I will say

a couple of things, I'm not trying to go too

far ahead of here, but I really liked that they

super toned down Simmons. I really liked, this

is probably the only movie that I've actually

liked Megatron. I like the fact that they turned

him into a truck because it looked a hell of

a lot cooler than the Jets he was in the two

previous films. He looks really really cool.

I mean I I was just complaining and this was

Well, like a week ago we were complaining about

movie Megatron for one reason or another and

I basically said that he looked like a big mess

of tinfoil that somebody scrunched up and kind

of maneuvered into the vague shape of a humanoid

and He was just all pointy bits and didn't look

like anything But now he does. I mean, he's still

kind of got that Megatron face, which is, you

know, all teeth and big red eyes, but he's got

a body that looks like it could possibly be a

Transformer. Yeah, as most of the characters

that are introduced in the third one does, I

think they finally learn their lesson about jagged

metal edges. Yeah, you can't tell what's going

on in the movie. But no, I think he looks badass.

And I just sent out images today on Twitter.

of Jin Sayatomi had did a custom of that Mack

truck Megatron and it just looks awesome. Yeah

it does. It's just it might be one of my favorite

Megatrons. He replied to us and said it's on

eBay if you want to bid. I looked at it it was

like 190 something dollars. Oh it was 220 when

I checked it. I was like, whoa, it's cool, but

it's just in my pocketbook with screaming. And

the sad thing is that I hate saying that this

is one of my favorite Megatron's because it looks

so cool, but it's a movie design. And historically,

I've hated the movie designs. Well, on toys,

yeah. We'll get to that a little bit later. What

about you, Kevin? What are your first impressions?

I mean, I was very happy that I avoided all knowledge

of... I mean, the only thing I knew going into

this movie was that Shockwave and Sentinel Prime

would be in it at some point. I avoided all spoilers,

all rumors, everything, and I was very happy

I did that. I went into this movie with absolutely

no opinion. I wasn't optimistic. I wasn't pessimistic.

I just was going to see a summer action blockbuster

and let's see what I thought about it. But I

left the movie very happy, very entertained,

and I'll stick with my... quote from twitter

from when i saw it every transformers movie has

been better than the previous yeah i'd agree

with that um what about you michael what were

your first impressions when you first saw it

i really liked it i mean i had no reason not

to like it i was kind of under the impression

that they were going to do better this time than

they did the second time Yeah, Michael Bay had

basically come out in public and said yeah, I

kind of screwed that last one up But the next

one's gonna be really good. I promise And so

I was taking him at his word and I was going

in saying this is gonna be pretty cool now You

know, like I said, there's not a whole lot of

story but it's big on action and There was a

lot to like and especially for g1 fans There's

a lot more to like here than there was in the

last movie Even probably a little more to like

here than that was even in the first movie Even

though optimus prime didn't say freedom is the

right of also And you can't you can't go into

a movie like this expecting a story Exactly right,

especially after the last debacle I wasn't expecting

anything But it turned out really nice and they

introduced some some new characters that I liked.

I mean Alan Tudyk to Tudyk Yeah Wash? Yeah, Dutch.

He was awesome. So if you're a Firefly fan or

Serenity fan, then it's Wash. But, you know,

he's awesome. He stole the show. Now, the last

movie they tried to introduce new characters

and it's like, why is this character in here?

Sam's college roommate. What the hell? Why is

he here? He's here to be the butt of the twins

jokes. The twins. Why the hell are they here?

You know, I mean, it's just one thing that could

have been cut out of the movie after another

this movie Was tight. I couldn't find anything

that I would have preferred to have cut out I

can But we'll get to that in a minute. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I'm just like, you know, I really liked

it I I've heard other people complain about it

and I'm I'm not entirely sure if they have valid

complaints. Yeah, I'm just saying. And Pegleg

Megatron, what about you? Don't talk about me

like that. I'll cut your bars off. But anyways,

um... Yes, I did say that to you. Just give your

thoughts already. Okay, candy ice. Um... I...

watched the movie for the first time and Found

myself because I had a bootleg copy fast -forwarding

a lot. Oh really because It to me felt like it

was dragging on in a lot of places For instance

The scene with the whole scenes of Sam And his

girlfriend, like, having to set up this job.

Bullshit. Complete waste of my time. Nobody gives

a fuck about Shia or the rest of the story. Give

us some goddamn robots. At least with the 60s

clips, that's what it was about. So I didn't

have a problem with that part. I was glad when

they moved past Sam being a little douchebag.

and got to the actual, you know, story. And I

wasn't entirely happy with Megatron, but that's

a different story entirely. Although I will give

you this, that this is the best portrayal of

him in the three films so far. It's just, yeah.

But, um... The first movie where he had one line,

and the second movie where he had... Yeah, and

the second movie where he had four lines and

got his face cut off. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah this

this movie. I liked him better than the other

two, but that still doesn't say much Sentinel

badass just no way around it. Just badass. Yeah

As far as the battle in the city It was it was

fine But I felt like I was watching revenge of

the fallen again where they're doing the 45 minute

run to go give the matrix to prime Yeah, I kind

of agree with that I agree with that to the point

of the building The building leaning over light

like that. That was a constant slow burn like

I was fine once they hit the ground and actually

started just running with it, but it's just it

felt like it dragged in too many damn places

and it just it was annoying in that sense and

then the fact that They introduced these decepticons

or they reinvent them and they really don't get

any screen time other than just to destroy shit.

There's no dialogue. There's not, you know, it's

just basically you're having an entire movie

about humans. That's, you know, I mean, I know

that's what Bay went for, but it's about the

robots and the robots are almost like tertiary

characters altogether. I thought this one had

more robots than any of the other movies, though.

It did. I think it did. But there's no story.

It's not any different than Revenge of the Fallen

in that sense. It's still... Right. They have

40 new robots, but none of them actually do anything

to further the story along. No. I mean, shit,

look at Shockwave. He could have been a badass.

I would have loved to have just seen him taking

out Megatron and taking over. Yeah. Mean he did

it no more with the the new characters But I

still think there was more dialogue between the

Transformers than there has been in any of the

movies No, and I will agree with that, but I

think that they still fell short I'm gonna say

that it's worse than revenge of the following

because it's not but Action wise this is the

best one story wise the first movie has that

I wanted to say that the reason you wouldn't

like let's say the the building scene where the

building's falling over is because you didn't

see it in 3d you didn't actually say yeah that

scene was slow but i i have a feeling that you

were like yeah that whole scene just blew in

3d that's no matter how long it takes to get

through or how pointless it is because they just

run up this building and then run right back

down uh they don't even show how they get back

down it's like how they get back down Well, I

was the one that said that, and I was forced

to see this thing in 3D because the theater I

went to didn't give you a goddamn choice between

2D and 3D. In 3D, it was awesome. I don't see

it, like, this is a whole other thing, and I'm

sorry to cut you off, Steve. This is a whole

other discussion we can have on GCR or something

like that. I do not, every movie I've gone to

see in 3D, between having the glasses on... and

having them off, I see no damn difference. I

don't understand that. The only thing the glasses

do for me is they make the goddamn screen darker.

See, I don't get that. I hear that from people

all the time and I cannot understand how you

can't see a difference between those two. I don't

know if it's something in your eyes. No, there's

two different ways that it could not affect you.

One, if you're color blind. I'm not color blind.

I have optic atrophy with an astigmatism. OK,

well, even then, if you're some glasses, that's

not going to help you much. But like me, I'm

partially color blind. I can't differentiate

certain colors. So when I'm looking at it through

3D, it just looks like I'm looking at different

colors. I don't really see the depth. And unless

you're directly in front of the screen in the

middle of the theater, you're not going to get

the optimal 3D that you would. Like if you're

sitting at the top or the bottom, you're pretty

much fucked. If you're not directly in the center,

all the way around, you're not going to get the

best 3D experience. I never thought about that

because I've never not been in the center. We'll

see because I sit at the top when I go to the

theater and that's more so because I don't want

people around me or more so behind me throwing

shit because I live in the ghetto and I have

to put up with people's bull crap every time

I go to the theater. Which makes it almost not

worth going but yeah, that's a side side point

We went to a 3d movie that was they had some

voucher for you know, just free passes for everybody

and so we went and I think was for Despicable

Me and We sat at the top and we're like, okay

We can't really see a damn difference in the

3d and then as we're walking down to leave we

were in the middle and Everything was popping

out Right now. I've noticed that in real 3d and

real 3d if you turn your head And they kind of

look at the screen out of the corner of your

eye everything splits in half into two pieces

I mean or it depends on where you are in the

room is how it's gonna look with IMAX I don't

get that I think because of the the technology

they use Yeah, no IMAX 3d and real 3d are two

different animals They're they're two completely

different sets of glasses two completely different

technologies if I was going to see it in 3d though

It would have to be an IMAX hands down IMAX Yeah,

I saw it in both and I would say that IMAX is

way better I guess the main point though There

is and I think I agree with Michael if you're

capable of seeing it in 3d And you can you can

actually see the 3d in 3dness then that scene

isn't as bad I think the building seems much

better if you can actually see the 3d effects

on it What I meant though about the building

scene being a slow burn is that I mean They basically

they don't show this it's basically a bullet

ripple matrix effect of the building falling

a Building is not gonna fall that slowly once.

It's being torn down That's my point here I think

I can kind of see that to some extent but again,

it's you know, they're going for the whole element

of it Yeah, that's true. So it's they're gonna

do it whatever way presents itself the best.

Yeah But yeah, I would definitely say that there

were points that could have been trimmed Yeah,

that would be one of them and then beginning

Well, just of Sam trying to get a job I To me

that was all pointless They could have just you

know, they turned him from you know hero to pansy

and well It was it was pointless some parts were

pointless, but they did need to set up the fact

that he was no longer the the hero type guy like

he wasn't he had fallen on bad times and you

know people didn't listen to him they kind of

needed something so that he to set up the fact

that he wasn't in with the Autobots and like

there was some distance there. I mean, they're

not saying they had to do it exactly how they

did it, but there was a character development

there as far as he's not the same character that

he was in the past two movies. He's actually

trying to grow up. He's no longer a teenager.

He's not a boy in this car. They're completely

separated now. And he's kind of got this crappy

replacement vehicle that kind of looks like Bumblebee

but it's a giant piece of shit. It's even got

the same biatch thing in the window. Yeah exactly.

Well even his mom says it kind of looks like

Bumblebee if Bumblebee were a giant pile of shit.

I cracked up. I love the parents. I think they're

awesome characters. I think they're good characters

but I don't think that they needed them in here

either. They just they were kind of a cameo role

one of one of my Arguments about the first or

the second movie was the fact that their cameo

went on far too long Yeah, the second movie.

I will agree. This was a nice short and sweet

cameo exactly I think that they were they needed

to be there especially after Sam's car broke

down and they had to drive them all over the

place But the fact was is he's at his lowest

point now. I mean, he's unemployed. His parents

are kind of like, what the hell's wrong with

you? His father is like, what the hell's wrong

with you? You don't have a job. And, you know,

and he's he has saved the world twice and he

just wants to be useful. And the fact is, is,

you know, he he's not going to get that chance.

We're off the bat. He's got to work. He's got

to work his way up. He has to pay his dues and

he just doesn't feel that he has to. He's like,

well, hey, I saved the world twice. What the

hell, man? And you feel that I mean it comes

across And and just before it gets too dark for

him you get John Malkovich in with the comic

relief So yeah, I mean I'm saying, you know,

they might not had to do it as long as you know

Steve I get what you're saying Maybe it's a little

bit too long, but I still think part of that

was needed as far as character development So

you got away from the boy in the car? Part of

it was needed, but it was way too drawn on like

it was it was It should have been hell of a lot

shorter. My biggest issue with the entire franchise,

as far as Sam goes, is... You hate Shia. No,

I'm not even going there yet. No, okay, listen,

I have an actual valid point here for once. Now,

shut up. Throughout the entire franchise, each

movie, he starts off douchebag of the day. Throughout

each movie he progresses to being a better character

at the end of the first film He was he was that

he had better character development you go into

revenge of the fallen You take him all the way

back to douchebag of the day and then build him

back They keep taking him back and building him

back up what you should have done was make him

douchebag in the first movie build him up Keep

the building going through revenge of the fallen

and up to now to dark of the moon That's my biggest

problem with the character of Sam is they keep

taking him back And as Michael said, you know,

the kid has saved the world twice Not only that

the government gave him a college educate education

and he went through college and And did all this

stuff to get educated You telling me a kid that

saved the world twice with a college degree cannot

get a job Seriously? Yeah. It's kind of shocking.

They red -flagged him. That's right. Every employer

says... They red -flagged him. He's got the Obama

administration behind him. One big -ass mistake,

America. Every employer says... I am not commenting.

Oh, you've been flagged by the FBI, I see. And

it's like, yeah, about that. You know, so I mean,

they basically didn't do him any favors by having

that on his permanent record. Hmm, and he can't

talk about he's under a gag order. So he can't

say yeah, I kind of saved the earth that time

and They can't yeah, he's he's he's frustrated.

He's just Yeah He spends the beginning of the

movie just being a giant douchebag and it's like

how does he How did he get this girlfriend? I

mean, this ridiculously hot girl in this ridiculously

awesome apartment. And they explain how he met

her and they don't really explain why she likes

him. To me, it's just Megan Fox couldn't act

her way out of a paper bag, but she was damn

hot. And the question becomes, how did this idiot

here end up with this damn hot girl? And again,

you end up with a second damn hot girl. And it's

like, how did this idiot end up with this damn

hot girl? I tell you one scene I could have done

without the entire movie is that whole goddamn

bunny scene in the beginning. Oh my god. No,

because you see she was wearing like panties

and little else while she was holding the bunny.

She's like, come play with my bunny. I enjoyed

it. Steve, the reason it drew out so long, the

reason the whole Sam angle drew out so long in

the beginning was because they filmed their 50

minute battle scene for the end and then they

were just scrapping for shit to make it long

enough to be a real movie. That makes perfect

sense we got another hours worth of crap But

yeah, but I agree it seems that she's not involved

with maybe dragged more on than the ones that

she was involved with though Yeah, you should

talk about the acting because this girl can't

act either So she's better than Megan Fox. I'll

give her that yes, so we've already transitioned

through the thoughts in the story So now we're

on the thoughts on the acting Keeping track with

our our rundown Well Carly didn't smile through

the whole movie. She didn't emote through the

whole movie She well she kind of looked upset

she kind of you know puffed her lip out a little

bit of Sam at one point when she Dismembered

the bunny But other than that is she didn't really

emote at all and there's people that say Online

I've read you right that you know The one scene

where she actually did look like she was doing

something. She wasn't doing anything at all There

was she's just kind of standing there dumbfounded

as things blow up behind her and This and it's

like well, that's her one look. She's standing

there with a jaw open like oh And shouldn't she

be like going? In the middle of an explosion

or holy shit, that's mechatron. I think I'll

crawl in this lap and call him a bitch She doesn't

do any of that. She doesn't say anything. She

doesn't emote and it's like she's not acting

at all Yeah, I I just didn't I mean she's gorgeous

fine. I get it He didn't hire Michael Bay didn't

hire her because she could act Megan Fox wasn't

hired because she could act Megan Fox was hired

because she looked really good bent over Michael

Bay's Ferrari Exactly that that was her audition

wash my car and she did and he went Yeah, okay,

you're hired. I mean her from obscurity Yeah,

nobody knew who she was and made her you know

one of the you know nation's hottest actresses

Overnight she couldn't handle it and so she got

replaced this girl Rosie Yeah, so Carly Painfully

hot again, but can't act and she wasn't hired

because she could actually was hired because

she's a Victoria's Secret model Yeah, and she

showed up for her audition in white panties Well

truth be told he directs them the Victoria's

Secret models, so Yeah, no, that's fine. I don't

I don't mind. I don't I realize that she's not

there because she's a great actress She's there

because she's hot You know who I really liked

and we're gonna go back to revenge of the fallen

here Isabella Lucas. Oh, yeah late. Yeah the

girl who played the defender. Yes. She was hot

Hotter than either one of these two. Yeah It

was like oh, yeah, so anyway, but you know again.

I don't think she could act either damn was she

hot I Think she could have done a better job

Yeah, I mean obviously nobody that's involved

in this movie is doing an incredible acting job

because incredible actors wouldn't sign up for

Transformers movies. Oh, yeah, look at the actors.

They've got they've got John Turturro they've

got No, but I'm just saying, none of these guys

are Academy Award actors. None of them are ever

going to be. The only high -profile person they've

got in this entire film franchise is the voice

of Megatron. Who is Angelina Jolie's father again?

John Boyd. He was in the first film. He wasn't

the president, was he? Secretary of Defense.

Secretary of Defense, which they also had Pat

Fraley play. Academy nominated. I'm talking about

guys with major roles. I mean, none of these

guys are like, I'm just saying the quality of

acting, you can't compare the quality of acting

of people in Transformers compared to like, you

know, huge movies that I don't have any examples

right now. But the point is, my point is for

this one is every single human actor to me was

an improvement on their acting in the previous

films. I liked every human character better in

this one. Even though I am anti -human characters

in Transformers films, I liked them all better.

If you take Rosie Huntington -Whiteley over Megan

Fox, that's an improvement. John Turturro's character,

not nearly as annoying to me. I like what they

did with Josh and Tyrese, having them kind of

on the edges. I thought that was an improvement.

Even Shia, I thought was an improvement. So it

just seemed to me that everybody was... Liked

better in this movie Right, right. I'll give

them all credit for that. You know who can't

act to save their own life even worse than Rosie?

Buzz Aldrin Yeah, he has every right to be at

any movie he wants to be enemy he has earned

that right he has walked on the moon I get it,

but it's like he's gonna be a men in black three.

They're going back. Oh god. Don't give them ideas

I wouldn't doubt it. It was awesome that he was

in the movie though. No, it was awesome, but

he walks in and he's like, hello, Optimus Prime.

And he says something like, it's nice to meet

a fellow space traveler. And it's like, dude,

you've been to the moon. Let me tell you about

all the cool places around the moon that I've

been to. But he walks in and he's looking at

Optimus Prime, but he's not. And everyone else

in the room who is an actor, by the way, is looking

where they're supposed to be looking. And Buzz

Aldrin is like looking over here somewhere. Deliver

his lines. What happened is, they told him to

look at this bright light and he's like, I can't

look at that light. And everybody else is like,

we'll go blind for it. I don't know. Both Aldrin

and Bill O 'Reilly, both the two cameos. Oh,

the Bill O 'Reilly. Yeah, that was cool. I did

like that was funny. And then and then he's and

then he's arguing with Simmons as he's getting

his house repossessed. Well, they couldn't bring

in Larry King. No, that's an end I mean Larry

King is not as bad as Bill O 'Reilly is Well,

they had to get somebody as far -fetched as Simmons

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, I gotta bring you know

What have been really awesome if they put fucking

Conan in there and took Conan's house away that

had been great shut up But anyways, what are

you guys thinking about the actor that as far

as like I mean Michael said his piece, but Mike

or Steve I agree with Michael about, uh, Epps

and, uh, and Lennox. That's how you build character.

Their characters have developed over the three

films, unlike fucking Sam. You know? I still

hate that he's named Sam, by the way. I do too!

It should be Spike. It should be fucking Spike!

But, they did it right in the sense that... If

they reboot the series, or if they - because

Shia wants nothing to do with the next one, they

could use his cousin Spike Witwicky. Oh god.

That's right. Jason Statham is Spike Witwicky.

Oh my god. I swear to god, if he's associated

with the franchise, I'm done. He's not. And Simmons

can nicely play the role of Chase now. Chip Chase.

Oh wow. He's an old Chip Chase. Oh my god. It's

low. As far as the rest of it, I liked Patrick

Dempsey's character. I liked the way that was

played out. The only time I even cared about

the national security advisory chick... That

was the only person I didn't like. She's useless.

The only time I cared about her is when she and

Simmons had that thing at the end during the

end credits. But I will say over the three films

the the moron that they usually put in charge

of Being in charge of oh my god, you can't like

that that that jerk in Revenge of the Fallen

It was like you can't do this. You can't do that.

I will say she's probably the best one out of

all of them She came with her own built -in comic

relief She had a little assistant she kept looking

at her like All right, are we doing this now?

She's like, uh -uh. The little assistant was

like a, um... Intern? No, yeah, she was an intern,

but I was gonna make a Cars reference. Damn it.

Oh, well, that's too bad. Shut up. She's like

the, um, she's like the pit crew from Cars. The

little pit crew guy. Nobody gets that reference.

Shut up. Nope. Nobody asked you, Kevin. As far

as the rest of the cast, for me it's all about

the robots now at this point. Well then, we could

get into that after Steve has any comments on

the actual human actors. Any that you liked or

didn't like? Alright. Here we go. Lennox and

Epps. Yes, I can see where they did get more

character depth. That was fine. They advanced.

They moved on. Whatever. Carly. Completely useless.

Completely useless. Just, yeah. Shia. Baby back

bitch. Patrick Dempsey's Dylan kind of reminded

me of G .B. Blackrock from the comics. In a sense

he's a rich guy that you know Yeah, but Jimmy

Blackrock ended up being a good guy though, but

he worked with the Autobots So this is his polar

opposite, but he looked just like him the evil

universe That's all I could think of when I saw

this guy, and I'm like okay, and then I just

wanted him to get stabbed through the heart during

the movie so that I didn't like him I was glad

Sam kicked his ass What bothered me about this

guy is that the whole time he's like this isn't

my fault You know, this was all handed to me.

It was a client of my father's. I had nothing

to do with it. It was just I inherited it. And

then he's just not like I'm evil. You know, I

dig it. And you can't have it both ways. He's

a kiss ass to the robots. But I also don't know

how much I can buy Sam actually kicking that

guy's ass. But he did smack him in the head with

a rock. And then he got thrown into the pillar,

which electrocuted him to death. So yeah, so

I could believe that that it's death by proxy

as long as all out fistfight and he lost yeah

the wiki parents I could see where they were,

you know useful during his job hunt Beyond that

I don't care. I love that. I love the parents

She comes first. I don't like her but You know

the first time I saw the movie it didn't occur

to me It's like she comes first as in okay heard

before me and the second movie it actually kicked

in. Oh, she comes first See, I like the parents

but I'm with I like the parents overall, but

I also don't necessarily see the point of them

in this movie I mean, I guess they just wanted

them to have them in all of them, but There was

the least amount of reasoning for them being

in this one out of the three films I would have

been disappointed if they skipped them. Yeah.

Yeah I like characters. John Malkovich in this,

as useless as he was, was entertaining to say

the least. Just being, you know, just seeing

how Sam was kind of like, okay, you're not gonna

give me the job I want, fuck you, I'm leaving.

And then he's like, wait, wait, wait, wait. And

then just gives him a job. He's like, here's

a bone. Yeah, I, I, I had mentioned before that.

And then he gets tickled by Bumblebee. What is

up with that? Bumblebee's like come here little

human. It's like a person petting a dog. He just

flipped over He's like hey, and he kicks his

legs up near I was trying to fight him like I

think he was and the bumblebee's like I'll just

blast you He had his gun in his face like I'm

gonna get you you know and then he's just laughing

like a madman like So We get to the the the FBI

CIA whoever the hell that was Francis McDormand

playing. I hated that character. I hated the

one that they had in Revenge of the Fallen, but

I hated this one more. Yeah. I can see that.

I liked when Sam was mouthy to her because that's

how I would be if I were in that situation. So

I associated very well with that. But I. didn't

like her at all. Dutch, on the other hand, was

fucking hilarious. Dutch was amazing. There was

no background information on him, but little

bits were sprinkled in there enough to know that,

yes, I like this character. He was just a little

bit off kilter, like an upgraded, better version

of Simmons. So I would tolerate this guy in future

films, for sure. Oh, yeah, I think he balanced

out Simmons very well most definitely he was

the gang to Simmons Ian We've all kind of like

skipped over the big pink elephant human character

in this entire movie Mr. Wayne was yes a character

that's just like this is the character that I

cannot stand even more than I Must have blocked

it out from my memory because I forgot he was

even in this guy He's in mostly the hangover

likes to pull down his pants and every film he's

in furry vengeance pulls down his pants hangover

one pulls down his pants hangover two starts

with his pants and pull him down yeah and the

monkey sucks him but anyways uh Actually, I would

say that was the worst cast you know that was

just casting because he's popular right now Yeah,

I hated him with a passion. I was glad that he

got thrown out of a window by a laser beak That

part well, but I'm glad he died You have the

guns drawn he didn't shoot you should have shot

Yeah, he's playing like a gangster type thing

like, I kill you motherfucker and then he's like,

I'll just wrap this cord around you and throw

you out the window. Only t -shirts that say Wang

shot first. That would be interpreted so wrong.

I know. We've got to make up our mind. Is it

Wang shoots first or she comes first? Why we

could have it say something different on both

sides of the t -shirt What about the voices I'll

let you guys start back over on that Down we

completely forgot about Kennedy Kennedy can't

act either most of that was a good majority of

that was stock footage though. It was They like

how they recreated the stock footage. So it looked

like I did while it was being filmed They did

the the TV like it was actual footage from the

moon and actual footage from the TV that they

showed people back in the 60s Yeah, but I liked

how they worked Nixon and Kennedy and all the

everything that they did that was based on other

footage was good Yeah, yeah Neil Armstrong, you

know every all of it Right. I liked I liked it

up until they actually tried to show Kennedy's

face Like Nixon they didn't show his face you

know Obama they didn't show his face, but they

did that with W and the first film on the plane

They had him there, but they didn't show his

face And I'll buy that I like that I think that's

funny, but Kennedy they showed his face, and

it just looked really bad Don't they know they're

supposed to stick with the back of the head Yeah,

that was a mistake. They should have just stuck

with the far shots. Yeah, you went a little dark

there, sorry. So, on to the voices here. I like

them all, for the most part. I just cannot see

Buster Bunny as Starscream, I'm sorry. I just

can't see Charlie Adler doing Starscream. Dude,

he played... I could have swore he played Starscream

at one point. I know for a fact he played Cobra

Commander. He's been playing Cobra Commander

for the last few years on random G .I. Joe stuff.

He's done them in all the live action movies,

but no cartoons or anything. Right, yeah. I don't

mind that they just enlisted Frank Walker to

do Shockwave for what little voicing Shockwave

had. It was Dr. Claw. I wish they would have...

Don't start. I wish they would have put his vocoder

on for the film. Right. Or at least now that

he's been upgraded. Yeah. Well, I was talking

about Shockwave, not Soundwave. Even then, that

kind of sounded like an ass. But when I was gonna...

You fucking let me finish. When I was gonna say

what... Was it Shockwave, really? Yeah, he was

Shockwave and Soundwave. Yeah, Frank Walker was

Shockwave for what little lines he had. That

wasn't even English. Hugo Weaving has three typecasts

to himself. Mr. Smith, Megatron, and Red Skull.

They're pretty much all the same character as

far as his voice He's a one -trick pony, yeah

as many as a cool voice though Lance Henderson

Lance Henderson has the same voice and everything

he does, but he's got a cool voice We'll get

to that Get to that later Peter Cohen. It's it's

Peter Cohen Hasbro and Paramount are going to

keep that gun on ice for every Optimus Prime

thing ever needed. Optimus Prime 50th anniversary

figure. He's three foot tall, he turns into a

truck in your living room. Watch out, in 2015

there's going to be a rough patch. But anyway,

Leonard Nimoy as Sentinel Prime, as I said earlier...

All is I kept hearing out of the voice was just

Galvatron I'm very glad that Leonard came back

and did a voice in the live -action movie I saw

an interview with Michael Bay about it after

the movie came out something about they asked

him about Like Michael Bay's wife is she's somehow

It's like her uncle I believe Uncle nephews cousins

aunts mother's dog, you know, it's that whole

thing I believe that he's married to Michael

Bay's aunt Yeah, something like that. I believe

that's the story Sam. Yeah, it's his wife's aunt

or something I did not even hear, like, I'm a

huge James Reymar fan, I love that guy, he's

a great actor. I did not even hear him as Side

Swipe. I'm probably gonna have to watch the movie

again and actually pay attention to see if I

can hear his voice, but I didn't even hear him

as Side Swipe. I think he had one line. Yeah,

that's probably why I missed it. Wheeling and

Brains, this is what... Dark of the moon is really

the second film in this franchise for me. This

is what the second film should have been Brains

is awesome Was a split sling back sling blade

No brains, dude, I know the movie that that voice

comes from oh, I don't know Yes We're going to

go throw these decepticons in the toilet. And

I think it was a huge surprise to everybody that

the wreckers were half Irish, half Scottish instead

of NASCAR rednecks. Thank God. God, that would

have ruined it for me. I think he learned his

lesson the first time. It's like, oh, everyone's

going to say that I'm using negative stereotypes

for my characters, so I guess I better not be

rednecks then. Now they sounded very much Australian

to me. It's like the one guy sounded like a dreadnought

Yeah and Jess Harnell as Ironhide I've loved

that since the beginning of the franchise Even

though another unfortunate G1 homage Ironhide

got blowed up. Oh, he didn't just get blowed

up, but that's not that's Yeah, no, I know, but

I mean, it's just the way that it happened. It's

1986 all over again. Spoilers. I don't know.

To me, the voices that stole the show is Colin,

Nimoy, and Welker. They make the movie for me.

And first of all, Colin and Nimoy having conversations

together is incredible. Yeah. Those are two of

the most epic voices. Of our generation talking

to each other on screen and that's just awesome

I don't care. I mean, I know you guys are gonna

disagree with me, but Frank Welker sound wave

voice just Like made me giggity like I was like,

that's the greatest thing ever I know everyone

likes to say it is the dr. Claw voice, but you're

actually Not given an accurate assessment because

you need to listen real closely to dr. Claw versus

sound wave and their different voices I know

it sounds a lot similar, but he does do it differently.

And I'm actually happy that they didn't do the

vocoder. It would have sounded really cool with

the vocoder, but for some reason, what they did

to me worked. And I loved Frank Welker's sound

wave. Next time, gadget. It's slightly different.

I can just imagine Dr. Klaas slash sound wave

saying. Oh mad beak. What are we going to do

today? You know something like that. Just call

laser beak mad beak and seeing is how sound wave

doesn't have a cat Yeah, but I mean, so I loved

Frank Walker and Neymar and Colin and and then

I obviously love brains and wheelie to me The

rest of them almost didn't even I don't even

remember them speaking Yeah Except for Megatron,

I guess but I could I like the Dino had an Italian

accent You didn't catch that Barely, but to me

I can barely remember Sideswipe and I'm gonna

call them Mirage, Wheeljack or the records. I

can hardly remember them talking. I need to go

see the movie again. Yeah, I think each of them

got like two lines. Yeah, although I wish they

would have been able to name them Mirage and

Wheeljack. Actually, I think that Mirage slash

Dino should have been named Sideswipe. Yeah,

that's true. Because he's actually a red Ferrari.

That would have made more sense. And as far as

Q... Wheeljack. In the credits, they do... It's

Q slash Wheeljack, so... Even though they didn't

call him Wheeljack in the movie... Although he

is the weirdest looking Transformer I've ever

seen. He looks like Einstein. They said they

tried to illuminate his head to give an homage

to G1 Wheeljack's lights by his head, but I'm

like, you gave him hair. That's what kills me

is they call Sentinel Prime the Einstein of his

generation. But Wheeljack actually looks like

the Einstein of his generation. It's like, damn,

is he ugly. Sentinel Prime more so looks like

Alpha Trion. Yeah, that's what I thought it was.

I could buy that. Preview. That's who I thought

it was, too. And as for the voicing, like character

wise, before voicing, I like Prime, Sentinel,

just from the looks, Shackwave, somewhat Megatron,

and some of Soundwave in this. The rest you're

kinda like meh. As for voicing, on the other

hand, I would definitely have to say that I like

Peter Cullen's performance, I like Leonard Emoys,

Frank Welker, of course I Just the rest of them

are kind of like you don't really hear too much

out of most of them to really get a feel I mean

other than like wheelie brains Starscream Megatron

Iron hide if you if you blink you miss that he

died. I Didn't even catch that until the second

time I watched it I'm like where the hell the

iron hide go and then all of a sudden I'm like,

oh he died And then I rewatched the movie and

I was like, oh, yeah, this is where he died Yeah,

everybody died It's like that's how it ends everybody

died. Yeah, what about the characters? What about

the characters that weren't voiced like laser

beak and and steel jaw and some of those guys?

Laser beak had a voice to him. He talked. Yeah,

he sounded pretty cool. Actually you talk. Well,

I mean it wasn't a Oh, yeah, that's right is

Keith. Okay. I remember now. Well, I didn't even

catch that steel jaw was in it and at the beginning

Still watching it watching it the first time.

I didn't catch that Laserbeak my only it's not

really the voice that I have a problem with it's

How many things does the damn thing transform

into seriously? He's he's a copier. He's a TV.

He's a he's a toaster. He's a blender He's a

pink mom He was doing a lot of scanning Yeah,

yeah, you think I like the pink bumblebee. I

thought that was cool out of out of all of the

three of Soundwaves minions that they've used

over the three films frenzy ravage and and laser

beak I Honestly have to say I like ravage the

best but laser beak was good. I don't dislike

laser beak Frenzy was just dumb That was back

when everybody was all spiky pieces of tin foil

Yes That's for sure. So that means the next movie

when they revive sound wave they're gonna have

rumble Michael Bay did his best to try to ruin

any attempts at a new movie They could technically

revive it I Am glad the trilogy is done. I am

glad too that someone else can have a shot at

it now I I'm so like he Bay should have never

gotten transformers No, yes, I've been it should

have been Spielberg to get transformers. They

should have got GI Joe I've been saying that

since the beginning They should have got nothing

they should be shot. He would have fixed GI Joe

GI Joe was a clusterfuck GI Joe was a clusterfuck

and You can thank the mummy director for that

Bay loves his military. He would have doctored

the shit out of the GI Joe. That's true. So Are

we done beating the actors apart? Yeah, yeah,

I don't know. I have one thought that I want

to throw out there and that's uh Leonard anyway

gets cast and suddenly we have all of these Star

Trek references in the movie Well, yeah, I wonder

Well, yeah, did they write those in? In the cast

originally or I mean did they write those into

the script originally or did Michael Bay sneak

them in after the fact? It was probably snuck

in after the fact. I don't know Michael He wouldn't

have been smart enough to do that. I Just think

that the writers said yeah We should put that

in there or the animators were like that would

be really funny if we threw that in there I guarantee

that wasn't Michael Bay decision it foreshadowed

the entire movie You could have done without

the entire movie with just being like oh, that's

just gonna happen I'm glad I didn't know he was

gonna go crazy though until I saw it. I kind

of figured would any other voice actor Sound

right as Sentinel Prime saying the needs of the

many outweigh the needs of the few No, but they

purpose they wrote that line for him. Oh Yeah,

I'm sure it was put in there specifically for

him. Yeah, there was it was actually a snippet

of Spock coming out of Bumblebee's radio. At

one point, he tells Sam, you know, you'll always

be my friend. Go ahead. No, that's what I was

going to say. That was actually a snippet of

his voice that was used there. And it's like,

that sounded like Sentinel Prime. Sam goes into

Dylan's showroom and says, this looks like the

Starship Enterprise in here. Yeah, they're all

over the place Abrams Enterprise. Yeah No, it

did they look just like that But I mean there

was a lot of Star Trek here and it makes me wonder,

you know if they had used like Let's say, you

know, they they can't get Patrick Dempsey to

do Dylan. So instead they get Johnny Depp You

know, are they gonna sprinkle in a bunch of Pirates

of the Caribbean jokes in there? Spikes Spikes

Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes

Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes

Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes

Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes Spikes

Spikes I don't know, I really liked it. I liked

having Nimoy as Sentinel Prime. They could have

called him Alpha Trion, and it probably would

have made a little more sense. They probably

should have called him Nova Prime, because Nova

Prime is the one that went batshit crazy and

sided with the Decepticons. Well, the question

becomes how much of IDW's scripts can they steal?

Yeah, that's true. Or Marvel or Sunbow. I'm sure

Hasbro owns the rights. Well, they could apparently

steal everything from Sunbow. Yeah, I'm wondering

at what point does that stuff become I don't

want to say public domain, but you know, is it

fair game? I don't know. Yeah, anyway, lots of

Star Trek II goodness in there. Yes. What are

your thoughts on the CGI? I liked it in this

one, actually. I want to say that. In the second

movie, they got the CGI about as good as it was

going to get. I mean, they got the polygon count

up there so high that everything looks photorealistic.

And the big difference in this movie from the

previous two is that they filmed everything slowly

in the sense that Michael Bay filmed as much

of this movie in 3D with 3D cameras as you can,

as he could. And you can't use that That You

know quick cam jerky her her key jerky run around

behind somebody camera movements that Michael

Bay loves so much. Thank God He was forced to

film everything slowly and the whole film benefited

from that Especially the CGI because the first

two movies you've got Robots fighting and here

you're you're so close up and everything's moving

so fast that you can't tell what's going on The

first movie all the robots were gray I know who's

fighting who and a jagged metal itches Exactly

the second movie that most of the robots had

color different colors And when they're fighting

you could kind of tell what's going on, but it

was like all blurred. It was horrible this movie

Prime sweeps in and just cuts five or six decepticons

in half and you can see everything and There

was no blurry you know short attention span theater

shot it was here's prime and he's cutting through

a whole swath of bad guys and it was very very

cool i agree they finally this is where they

finally got it right they finally started designing

the bots to not look like little pieces of tin

foil like you said and they finally resembled

transformers and like you said with the slower

cameras that help the fight scenes and everything

it's just like bit by bit after hearing all the

backlash throughout these three you know the

first two movies they finally started to get

things right too bad it was only in time for

the last movie i know we're on the cgi but there's

something i forgot to bring up earlier you still

have the g1 mistake of when optimus transforms

where the hell does his trailer go i know it

was still there but one of those things that

kind of I thought needed like maybe an additional

minute and a half was the scene at the end where

Prime loses his trailer. Right. And then he goes

back to find it. But we don't see him do that.

We just see him go off. And then the other team

goes off and we see the other team doing their

thing. He just shows up in jet mode. Five minutes

later, he shows up. I'm Optimus Prime. I'm going

to fly in and kick your ass. Yeah, a half a minute

scene of him turning a corner and seeing his

trailer and going, oh, there's my trailer and

having it open up and, you know, him suit up.

Yeah. Maybe a minute, two minutes tops wouldn't

have hurt the movie at all. And it would have

explained a lot. I still like I'm still very

happy that they put the trailer in, though, because

it's like as soon as I as soon as the movie started

and as soon as I saw the scene, the first scene

with him in his trailer, I'm like, yes, this

is an Optimus Prime. I can get behind. Shut up.

He did use the trailer in the beginning. I don't

like how it opened up though. The big circular

stargate? I mean, what was inside it, what it

looked like after it was opened up is nothing

like any trailer I've ever seen open up as far

as Prime's history, but I did love that the trailer

was in there in the first place. It's a subspace

portal. I wanted a roller to come out. It's around

the bridge. I wanted the guy with the roller

and all those little minions to come out. A little

blue off -road ATV roller, that would have been

awesome. Sam, get away in this. Sam, get to the

cube. Get to the chopper. As far as the CGI,

I thought it was really well done. You know for

me going to the movies whether it's in 3d or

or not it just I I notice more things when I'm

sitting here watching something on my computer

rather than I do in the theaters Like it's nice

that I can go to the theater and I can see all

the great you know big screen the way it's meant

to be shown this that and the other thing everything

else, but I Get the general gist of movies when

I go to the theaters, but I catch more when I'm

just sitting here watching it I can't stand watching

stuff on my computer. Anyway. Shut up. Well,

see, I didn't watch mine on my computer. I plugged

it into my plasma television. There you go. There

you go. The way to see this movie is at the IMAX.

Go to the IMAX and see it. Agreed. So we're gonna

move on to our favorite and least favorite scene

in the movie. Who's starting? You can go. I'll

start with my least favorite scenes. I got two

of them for sure. The scene where Carly jumps

on Megatron's lap and convinces Megatron to do

her bidding. That was pathetic. Like, you're

telling me Megatron is going to listen to this

little female human being ant? What she did is

she put a quarter in. She wrote them and then

showed them... The goods. That was just a terrible

scene. This ain't no kiddie ride. It was a terrible

scene first of all because she can't act. Second

of all because it was just dumb writing as far

as that's how this is what's going to solve everyone's

problem is she is going to convince Megatron

that Sentinel Prime's stealing his thunder and

that's going to solve everything. I think the

scene would have made more sense if it had included

an earlier scene that I felt was missing. where

Sentinel Prime, you know, pimp slaps Megatron

and says, you're my bitch now, you go sit over

there in the corner, and he does. Why are you

comparing this strong? Yeah, I mean there was

just something missing there, and it's just because

they don't know how to write, but that's one

of my least favorite scenes. My other least favorite

scene is anything involving that tremor, Sidewinder,

Decepticon, that I had no idea what I was looking

at the entire time. That was too much like the

first two films. Yeah, the Driller was way too

much like the first film as far as I have no

idea what's going on. I don't know what this

thing is. This is not a Decepticon. This is not

even a Transformer. This is like a robotic trimmer

worm. Scorponok! Sandworm! Trimmers! If they

would have taken all the minutes they dedicated

to that bullshit and given it to Shockwave instead,

that would have been much better. Yeah, I mean

then you would lose the entire building falling

down somehow Shockwave could have just went shock.

We've had a badass cannon on his arm. You could

have transformed to a gun and then shot it Exactly,

you could have done something. But uh, my favorite

scene is killed by humans So how badass could

he possibly be? Well, that's another fault but

My favorite scene is anything involving sound

wave, especially when he's got all the the bots

tied up and is ready to execute them one at a

time. For some reason I just like that. I like

hearing Soundwave's voice and I like this. That's

one of the first times where Soundwave is just

complete badass instead of subservient to somebody

else. So I loved that scene and I don't know

what's my other favorite scene. Anytime that

probably when Sentinel Prime kills Ironhide Because

that's pretty rough that was just harkening back

to the 86 animated film and just made me think

man Ironhide gets the worst deaths in history

That was the scene where they were supposed to

kill skids and mudflap Doesn't just die though

he they do him wrong he melts they they gave

him the the Uh, what's that called, the Cyber

Rust? The Cosmic Rust. The Cosmic Rust, yeah.

Yeah, the Cosmic Rust. The two worst Transformers

deaths in this entire franchise. Ironhide. And

Jazz. And Jazz. Well, Ironhide twice. Give me

a piece! How about two? Yeah, that's for sure.

Mike, what are your favorite and least favorite?

I'm starting with my favorite because just...

Some of my least favorites are just um My favorite

one of my favorite scenes was actually optimists

doing the whole You know will take the battle

to them. I I like that They gave him lines this

time around that didn't have to turn into internet

memes Just oh my god, we will kill them all is

an internet man Oh my god, it's better than give

me your face. I'll give you that It's so un -autobotly

But when he said give me your face, he says I'll

have two and he took sentinel and Megatron Yeah,

that's that's true. Um, I don't mind that they

didn't reuse one shall stand one shall fall I

shall stand two shall fall no like everybody

shuffle I like what they did I really just honestly

like my favorite robot scenes with optimus are

honestly when he's driving just because of the

damn trailer yeah the trailer is awesome my least

favorite scenes I'm glad that laser be killed

that douchebag but that entire scene could have

been cut out with Deep Wang and all that crap.

I was going to say, which douchebag are you talking

about? Well, the biggest douchebag of the film,

which is even bigger than Shia LaBeach. Deep

Wang. What shot first? As far as the parents,

I agree with you guys on they really weren't

needed that much, but it's nice to have them

in there. I will say that out of the three films,

this is the only one that I really kind of came

around and liked hit Sam's dad. I still cannot

stand his mother. His mother is the worst mother

in the world. Hate that you won't talk about

bad acting I would rather take Rosie hunting

in the white Lee and Megan Fox not being able

to act compared to over -the -top Weed brownie

eating mom. Oh Yeah, that should have been cut.

They had way too much time on the second film.

Yeah felt a lot better Yeah, no, it did you a

lot better. So um, I I wish like i'd get frank

walker is the voice god i still wish that they

would have found a way to hire david warner and

give shockwave a little bit more lines the track

or burden well you know but he said take a hike

he says i get two lines but overall I could probably

watch this multiple times. This is probably the

only one out of the three that I could watch

multiple times out of enjoyment. I like the other

two. They're okay. The first one was really good.

The second one, when I first saw the second one

in theaters, I really, really liked it because

I saw a lot of G1, like when they did the whole

pyramid scene at the end about, oh, we're gonna

steal your son or whatever. I swear to God, it's...

Changed it's it's based off the episode changing

gears where Megatron has this has the space needle

But Dark of the Moon, it's a solid movie For

the most part if you're not analyzing it Somebody

else go because I'm ready to choke here Steve

least favorite parts favorite parts. Well, my

favorite part I'd have to say Is I like the final

battle where Prime is getting his ass whooped

by Sentinel, and Megatron comes to save the day,

and then Megatron's like, how about a truce?

And Prime's like, how about not? And then just,

like, rips his head off, and then takes out Sentinel,

who's begging for his life. Prime's like, you're

my bitch now. And then he's like, goodbye. You

had the weakest knee, goodbye! And then blows

his head away, and uh... It's like well prime

just became the first decepticon Autobot leader

and He's one -armed bandit I I also liked Any

scene that had Dutch in it? Yeah Just because

he was badass I could deal with another film

with him in it and Simmons too because they toned

him down quite a bit By using Dutch So I can

see that. I did like the fact that there were

more robots in the battle, but here's my least

favorite parts. Any scene that had to do with

Laser Wang. That's what I'm going to dub that

scene now. I hate Laser Wang. I hate the ending

of the movie. How they just have prime say something

and he's the one -armed bandit and then it just

kind of fades out. It's like really I Will say

about the ending of the movie I did like that

they didn't Leave it open that they did put a

put a period on the movie where it's not left

open where I am Optimus Prime And I send this

message out to bloody bloody blah. I'm glad they

didn't do that again I hate the - that just brought

that to my attention. I hate the fact that they

always had him do that, and then they never went

anywhere with that. Yeah. I am Optimus Prime.

Do not come back to this world. They just had

new characters already in the movie. They never

showed like, oh, you know, somebody incoming.

Like, we heard this message, we're coming in.

They never did show it, but they do mention it

in this movie. They mention it, but it's still

like, why couldn't you at least spend a little

bit of time showing that? Because the movie was

two it's two hours and forty six. It's already

long as it is. Yeah, but half of it's not needed

so Yeah, I don't know. I like that. They put

a period on it, but I don't like that Mike I

guarantee Michael Bay was just like fuck everyone

I don't want anyone to be able to take this from

me, so I'm gonna kill off every major character

So there's no way they can do anything with it

That's when we get the Beast Wars movie. I swear

to God if they do that, and they don't have the

original Beast Wars cast I It would never happen.

They'd never be able to reassemble the cast.

I don't care. They would have to get Gary Chalk,

McNeil, David Kay. Yes, at the bare minimum.

That's why that'll never happen. You never know.

But I truthfully, if they were to do Beast Wars

movie They would have to do it in the style of

how they I don't know if you've seen the 2007

King Kong film How they had the gorilla and the

Tyrannosaurus Rex Battling and duking it out

where they looked so real That would work Like

and people for a while were taking that image

of those two about to at the standoff about to

beat each other's ass And they put Beast Wars

the movie in the middle nice Which it looked

like a badass trailer or combine the new planet

of the apes with the new Jurassic Park and it'll

look something like that Yeah, so I mean I I

think it would be interesting to see them do

it in that style Provided they never touched

it and they did it correctly and kind of keeping

with the Beast Wars kind of mythos somewhat.

Yeah What's your adamant about the cast? I would

be pissed if they didn't use... I can see where

they could swap out Gary, technically. I can

see where they could swap out Ian. But McNeil

and Kay... Neil Patrick Harris as Cheetor? No!

Steve, what if it's the exact same cast, but

you are Megatron? Will you still disown the franchise?

We would be set for podcasting for life because

Steve would get paid beaucoup bucks. That would

be true. If I was Megatron, that would fucking

rock. I would not disown it then. But. But, yeah,

I'm pretty sure Kay would jump at the chance

if he got it. But oh, yeah. But yeah, that would

just depend that Beast Wars doesn't have the

following G1 did. So that'll never happen. I'm

just hoping someone else gets a hold of it and

completely redoes everything and has nothing

to do with these three films. And as far as you

know like Like the you know before the and everybody

knows that listens to all these transformers

is one of my biggest pet peeves They'll do a

story or a rumor will come out like a month before

the the actual third film or fourth film comes

out Oh transformers 4 transformers 5 I My feeling

when I walked out of the theater, I love dark

of the moon They need to step off transformers

for at least two and a half three years before

they do another film But the reason they won't

is because the last movie and because of the

money I know our money than God I know it's because

of the money away from that I know but still

they have finally found this fandom and they

now know that it's huge a Beast Wars movie and

place of rebooting this They better fucking hire

me Me and Benny, yeah, we would we would know

Beast Wars in and out between the two of us So

I guess we can go on to a number of times We're

gonna see it plan to see it what medium IMAX

2d 3d real D for me I'm just waiting for the

DVD release at this point. I just I don't like

the theater going experience in general, so I'm

with you. I've seen it once in the theater I

will wait now until I can watch all three of

them back -to -back on DVD to really get a good

feeling of which ones I like the best Because

I have avoided watching any of them really multiple

times I'm waiting until I can see them all together

Steve Yeah, mr. Bootleg over there I've already

seen it two times. Yeah, I plan to see it in

the theater Probably gonna see in 2d just because

I don't care to spend the extra money. Yeah,

and Because it's not that big a deal. I'm going

from big screen to bigger screen. It's not That

big of a difference I'll probably do that because

my dad wants to see it and So we'll end up doing

that and then I won't watch it again until I

buy the blu -ray disc and then like Kevin said

watch them back to back to back now I know I'm

skipping ahead here in your little topics, but

since we did mention the Blu -ray and the DVD,

I'm looking at T -Formers. Transformers Dark

of the Moon is blowing up the box office as the

highest grossing film of the year. The Blu -ray

version of the disc will be ubiquitous, three

disc set, two Blu -ray discs for the film, and

special features, one DVD version of the film,

and digital copy according to the website's listing,

blu -ray .com. Another listing reveals that a

3D version of the film will also be available.

The date falls in line with the release month

of November for the Trilogy box set. November

15th, 2011 is when Dark of the Moon is set to

hit DVD and Blu -ray. It'll be on sale the day

after Thanksgiving. Interesting fact about this

that they're going to have the Trilogy pack,

the Blu -ray 3D combo pack, and a collector's

edition. Whatever the hell that means probably

gonna be all three films, but yeah, but that's

perfect for the Black Friday sales So it'll have

some type of deal that day Right, and I mean

we've seen and it's not just with the Transformers

live act. It's with any any big -budget movie

stores get each store Walmart Target FYE Every

store gets a different exclusive. It's like oh

my god We want you to buy the same movie 16 different

freaking times just to get all the exclusives

The DVD sales for this is gonna be amazing though

the DVD sales I mean, it's gonna come close to

like being up there at the top of all time Just

because of the timing wise. I mean how many people

are gonna buy this for their kids for Christmas?

Oh, I know it. Yeah, that's that's the thing

It's going to be ridiculous. Are you going to

wait for the box set? Yeah. Actually, I'll probably

just buy them on iTunes. I prefer a physical

copy. Me too. A box set in Blu -ray would be

very cool. I have the first in Blu -ray, the

second in DVD, and then the third one will be

in Blu -ray. Why don't you just sell the first

two that you have now and just buy the box set?

Because it's a redundant thing and I don't plan

on doing that Well, you know the box sets can

I come with a bunch of bonuses and stuff too?

The thing is how often are you actually going

to watch that? That's true. That's that's how

I think about it I might watch them once and

once in a blue moon every couple of years, but

it's not important enough for me to buy a special

edition Yeah, that's that's kind of how I am

now where I just buy like like if it's a movie

that I want to see that's come out I just either

rent it or I'll buy it through iTunes or Amazon

or something now see the difference for me is

if it's got a shitload of special features or

of in terms of deleted scenes or That kind of

thing. I'll eat that up, but like behind the

scenes stuff and all that other. I really don't

care Yeah, you only watch interviews with the

voice actors Yeah, I mean which I can't see them

doing when I had the two DVDs when I had the

two previous movies DVDs I only watched any of

the special features. I watched them once and

That was it Yeah So we will switch into Technically

we've already done kind of short comparisons

to the other two films. Yeah and throughout this,

so that's kind of moot. Mike, I believe you wanted

to bring up the fact about the soundtrack at

some point. Yeah. Everybody who's listened to

all things Transformers knows how I've ranted

about Linkin Park being the live -action Transformers

band. Linkin Park hasn't had a good song since

what I've done and since their album Meteora.

Oh, what's the name of this stupid song? Iridescent.

Iridescent So does not fit this movie. It fits

it as a end credit song. That's it. Other than

that, the soundtrack itself is kind of silly.

iTunes... Has and I think this is probably the

company that puts it out not just iTunes but

the three tracks that I wanted to check out I

was gonna buy individually except iTunes said

we're sorry you can't get these unless you buy

the entire freaking album Thank God I had an

iTunes gift card didn't really cost me anything

so The score itself the the Steve Jablonski score

It's probably the best score. He's done. I think

to To any of the movies. I liked a lot of the

you know the battle scene tracks And this is

just listening listening off of iTunes previews

for it So I mean it's okay. It's not worth what

they're asking for for a soundtrack. I don't

think though Yeah, but I think we'll jump into

the final rating We'll go back around from the

beginning. What do you rate this film at, Kevin?

I don't know, I have like a specific number in

mind, but I rate it as the best of the three

in my opinion. You know, there's parts of the

first two that I like and parts that I don't

like. To me, this was an improvement in an on

-off facets. The humans I liked better, down

to every single one of them. The robots are finally

starting to look like Transformers instead of...

foil like Mike Michael pointed out we got more

dialogue from the transformers the battle scenes

were easier to see probably like Michael said

because of the 3d camera usage so to me this

one ranks as the best out of the three all's

I have to say is a tan a fucking tan okay Billy

Bob reference from varsity blues Anyway, I would

probably give it an 8 out of 10 Because it was

just such a gorgeous movie. This is a 3d treat

for the eyes When they really Do 3d well when

they film it with 3d cameras and you know treat

it like, you know 3d movie foremost It looks

really nice and this is just amazing Michael

Bay strapped 3d cameras on everybody the the

whole scene with the skydivers jumping out of

the building or jumping out of the Helicopters

thanks to yeah next to the Willis tower It well

the Sears tower for most of the world, but you

know they changed the name a year or so ago It's

amazing that the whole scene with them if you

see it in 2d You're not gonna get the same effect,

but it's it's just rocks in 3d The whole movie

is just a testament to how good 3d can be when

you do it, right? You know number one I've never

seen a 3d movie look this good except maybe avatar.

Yeah, and again, that's cuz Avatar was gorgeous.

Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing but and this was Better

arguably better than avatar as far as far as

the the 3d usage goes it was You know again back

to Kevin said, you know It was the best movie

as far as being able to see the robots, the robots

looking good. The fight scenes were top notch.

Everything was really nice. The ending was kinda...

what the fuck? You know, there was a... I'll

bring it up now. In the book, Prime doesn't kill

Megatron. Megatron says... They actually have

the truce, yeah. Yeah, Megatron says, I think

we should make a truce and team up to... Defeat

this guy and prime says well, I think that's

a great idea and they they defeat sentinel and

then Megatron says hey my my home planet's right

there up at the sky man If I go back and sure

go ahead, you know off he goes And and there's

your truce and the he and the Autobots live peacefully

on earth Despite the fact that they pretended

to leave and most the planet got nuked by Decepticons,

but that notwithstanding Uh, you know, and the

ending was completely different. I think the

book's ending made more sense. I think that they

should have used the book's ending, then. Yeah,

they should have. I think they should have, but,

you know, it probably wouldn't have tested very

well with audiences. Audiences want to see Optimus

Prime kill everything that moves. And he even

says as much, he says, we will kill them all.

And at the end, if he would have let Megatron

go, well, you know, that's just Peter Cullen

talking about his ass. So, kill them all. You

know the ending was like what the hell and the

aerial alien ships that came in on yeah Exactly,

you know, it's like there were giant plot holes

like yeah, like all these decepticons come out

of the ground on the moon How the hell did you

know? Where did they come from? It's it's like

we all followed Megatron here, but we didn't

quite get farther than the moon So you're ranking

it eight out of ten then right? Yeah, I mean

it could have been I don't want to say it could

have been a 10 out of 10 because honestly, is

there such a movie? I don't I don't know. I'm

not sure. It's all a matter of opinion. But I

suppose. What about you? I would say that it's

about tied for me with the first film in some

areas that beats the first film, but in some

areas it falls short. So I pretty much give it

about an eight out of 10 out of movies in general.

If this could have been the first film and the

next two films could have built upon this amount

of awesomeness. The world would have been a better

place for it. I agree Agree, if they hadn't been

so stubborn from the beginning and actually listen

to people instead of waiting three films to listen

to people Yeah, that would have been the genius

move Again Michael Bay's a dumbass that you know

rapes giant metal bugs like Starscream so and

then that note He had to fail horribly before

he could you know do it the right way Yeah, it's

still failing horribly. He still managed to make

more money than God Yeah, he had to be spanked

by the fans, but anyways... Fans spanked instead

of fan wanked, oh my god. This is about to go

down a bad path. I can see that. Thank you for

joining us here on All Things Transformers version

2 .0. If you'd like to leave us feedback on the

show, there are three main ways to do this. First,

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Wars Megatron. My Twitter is scp21. What are

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Radio Network Yes, I left that out for now. I'm

Steve Megatron Phillips with TFG and Mike. Kevin,

Optimus, Solo, Thompson. And Michael Wilson.

Say thank you for listening and in the words

of Optimus Prime... You've made a grave mistake.

Hey, I have an idea. How about we get back to

the important topics like the fact that I almost

had my face cut off by Decepticon as a taxpayer

and like to lodge a complaint as a matter of

fact. You know the streets, break the rules,

take the heat You're at your best when the gold

gets run You've been put to the test but